#malal

Nine whole months ago I made this post on r/grimdank (Warhammer 40k meme subreddit) based on those Which Sin Do You Relish the Most? memes but with Chaos Gods instead

I decided to watch a few YouTube videos before bed only to find someone did a BurialGoods style reading of it

I like the voice acting, but my only criticism is they cut the last one out like a coward

1. (The Lion)

“Well, they are certainly effective. And exceptional. And by thunder, Perturabo would have you know it.”

2.(Redacted)

“If PTSD were a Legion. They are equal parts bitterness and love of duty. Pray the bitterness does not seize primacy.”

3. (Fulgrim):

“All the stubbornness of the Thespian Hoplites at Thermopylae without the panache. And like the Thespians, they are often doomed to be forgotten.”

5.(Khan)

“Too many tanks. To little initiative.”

6.(Russ)

“If I were to say I fear but one of the Legions, it would be the Fourth. Against them, even the strongest foes fall in ranks and columns.”

7.(Rogal Dorn) “My brother has often bragged that his Legion could hold a quarter inch of ground against an invasion fleet if so directed . And, do you know something? I believe him. As do I believe he would waste their lives, especially the Olympians, were -HE- so directed.”

8.(Konrad Curze)

“They smell of oil, rust, and graveyard loam. But they get the job done.”

9. (Sanguinius)

“Not an inch of gilt. Or lace. Or whimsy. Brutally efficient.”

10.(Ferrus Manus)

“They are, for the most part, hardbitten men. Not without their merits as individuals, but men beaten in to a sort of collective that values the phalanx over the fire team and sees the legion itself as an apex hunter whose weaker parts must be excised, from time to time. Begin command of a Legion with a decimation order, and this is the result. I am not so certain this is a good thing.”

11.(Redacted)

“Cranky bastards, like my brother. But when you can get them to loosen up, they are just as human as any other man. Some day all sons must come home from burying their dead amongst wine dark stars. And I wonder what will happen then.”

12. (Angron)

“They rely too much on artillery, too little on cold steel. “

13.(Gulliman)

“Exceptional logisticians, which of course is understandable given their father. I know of few Terminator companies who excel in the siege as they do.”

14.(Mortarion)

“One would think that Hellenes would have a better sense of humor. They certainly excel in tragedy and drama… If you listen carefully, you can almost hear the sound of the whining over the sound of the bolter fire.”

15.(Magnus)

“Good soldiers. Well read. A bit boring.”

16.(Horus)

“Better that they adorn themselves in nothing but cold ceramite and iron. They would, otherwise, never be able to scrub themselves clean. And I do not speak here of mud.”

17.(Lorgar)

“His lack of faith reflects poorly upon them…”

18.(Vulkan)

“They are passionate men forced to do dispassionate things. I like the average man among them very much, but I fear the tragedy he could become.”

19.(Corvus Corax)

“They’ll just give any Legionary a gun and stick him in a hole these days, it would seem. Poor bastards.”

20.(Alpharius Omegon)

“Their father is unworthy of them.”

Khorne - a blood candy, like a hematogen or something like that, or protein powder.

Nurgle - a food that was left to rot for a VEEEEERY long time or literal feces.

Tzeentch - coffee, because of how inconsistent the reactions you get to it are.

Slaanesh - everything at once, but the longer you taste the more the taste of caramelized ""babybutter"" becomes dominant.

The Dark King/The God Emperor of Mankind - human flesh. Stop chewing on the corpse ffs.

Malal/Malice - paper. Specifically - lawsuit paper.

so since I've been doing some 40k posting lately about lore postulations I might as well commit. This'll be a long one.

I'll start by saying this is obviously all interpretative based on texts written by different authors and will ultimately be decided years down the line by corporate interests rather than hard narrative dictates

But from the implications in the Horus novels it reads to me that, when GW eventually decide to take The Next Big Plot Step (beyond just "hey look another Primarch is back")

It'll be the death of the Emperor and his immediate reincarnation into two aspects of him/the Imperium that the total mass of humanity has come to associate with him

the first being The Star Child - salvation (not hope for the here and now), endurance (neither change nor decay), the breadth of human experience (not excess), ardor and zeal (not rage), and most importantly: the childlike naïveté in thinking that these are enough and that it just doesn't get more complicated than that

and The Dark King, which is a term they have been seeding since I will bet DOLLARS TO DONUTS they were and are trying to negotiate the right to use Malal even as we speak but are hedging their bets against it

who is, also, very much the Imperium as a reflection of the Emperor as he has become while trapped on the Golden Throne - both dead and alive (that half-face emblem...), baleful in its ire towards the Chaos Powers (those nearest to him, a representation of humanity's persecutions of itself) tyrannical in its all encompassing doom (though never jolly! there is no happiness for it in knowing cessation is inevitable, no new life to spring from the rot)

And I say this because within the fiction of 30k and 40k, there is one character that is a long-time fan favorite and that would make the most kind of sense with a whole new faction and codex associated with it upon its return to max out profits IF all the above were to happen

motherfuckin'

Konrad Curze

they've already established dude was very probably killed wearing a crown full of Eldar Spirit Stones; his Chaos "alignment", if we were to use that term, would've fit best with that of Malal - hopeless, spiteful, self-discordant

can you not see the tabletop model in your mind's eye? Headless Horseman Konrad Curze, Herald of the Dark King. His True Father's Son at long last, all dark visions come to pass, all futures lost, his prophecies vindicated; he returns, finally, as what he started as, what he (despite his own sense of nihilism) first tried to be: an aspect of true even-handed justice, striking against the corrupt Imperium as well as twisted Chaos