#lysander fic

✧. - ̗̀ CASTIEL . . .

we all know castiel has the worst temper out of the boys. he feels and sometimes because when he started dating you he truly wanted to change that, control more his reactions. truth is, you helped him a lot with that without even realizing it, he got a lot more calmed around you, more mindful, watching his words to not be hurtful or not sound as aggressive when vision his opinions or expressing himself, he learned to be gentler.

however, he hates arguing with you, he really does. but most of the time he forgets that because he gets pissed and suddenly he gets defensive and all he thinks about he’s not being the one loosing the argument. i feel like he’s easily taken over by feelings and he might say hurtful things but regrets them immediately after they left his mouth but he’s too proud to just immediately apologize so he normally storms off and decides a right then and there the argument is over.

arguments normally start because i think he has a hard time expressing his feelings. he’s the kind of guy who never got used to doing it when he was young so he sometimes feels corny about opening up and telling you what hurts him or annoys him so when you accidentally do sometimes he takes it personal and doesn’t realize he can simply communicate it to you.

but something about him is that he will never ignore you. he is very emotional in terms of being very temperamental and not controlling properly his feelings sometimes but he has a certain degree of maturity that makes stop in his tracks and tell himself that he’s not a child and that he won’t act like one. i mean, he’s still stupidly in love with you even when he’s mad and he’s very anxious when u don’t talk to him for a while. which also plays a very important role in him apologizing, because he’s miserable when u don’t talk to him. he gets grumpier and more annoyed and snappy than usual, which says a lot, and since he changed a lot more since he got with you (he’s not a sunshine and rainbows kind of guy now), it’s easy for people to assume he’s upset because you’re mad at him or because he argued with you, lysander being normally the one to talk some sense into him about how he needs to stop being dumb and simply apologize (if he’s the one who fucked up).

when he was the one in the wrong, he will come and apologize, maybe in his own awkward way but he will because he refuses to let you two feel weird around each other just because he’s terrible with words. he will randomly caught you alone, probably after looking nervous as hell the whole day following u around and looking like he wants to say something he doesn’t dare to, and simply grab your shoulders and tell you straight up “I didn’t mean that, okay? Any of what I said.” He frowned (which looked more like a very slight pout), and u were going to make a comment about it but couldn’t because he was speaking again. “I’m sorry. I know I give you a lot of reasons to get tired of me but,” And then you were kissing him, very hard, knowing everything else he needed to say already, and deciding to spare him from the suffering of getting cheesier than that, to which he got all relieved, chuckling into your lips before grabbing your face and kissing you deeper.

also, make up sex is a MUST for him, not every time, but you look really hot when you’re angry. and you found that seeing you pissed (when it’s not serious) and mouthing off at him makes him stop listening entirely. so it normally leads to him pining you to whatever is closer, not needing to make it to a bed, sneaky fingers making you forget entirely what did he even do to annoy you, lips devouring yours and swallowing every insult you intended to throw at him, because now all you want to do is make up and he will definitely give you a good reason to forgive him. and yes it does work when he’s the one pissed. “i’m still mad,” he said breathlessly (which sounded like a whine but he won’t admit it so better not to point it out). “mhm” you hummed against his skin mockingly. “should i stop then?” you said, holding his shirt up with ur hands as your lips mouthed on his lower stomach area. “fuck no,” and u chuckled at that.

✧. - ̗̀ NATHANIEL . . .

nath is very weird when it comes to arguments. because he naturally wants to de-escalate them before they get worse, normally because he definitely doesn’t like fighting or anything that involves yelling and shouting at each other. after what happened to him he came to the realization that he won’t ever raise his voice at you, which is hard when someone is angry but he refuses to see a look in your eyes he had seen on himself before when someone u love yells at you just because they’re mad, so that’s a big no for him while fighting.

he struggles, contrary to castiel, to admit his feelings to himself. he’s a very strong people pleaser, he always has been and it’s hard to get rid of that, so he constantly thinks that he needs to not be too much in order to not be annoying and so people won’t get annoyed by him. that’s why even when something hurts him, like being misunderstood. when people don’t understand his intentions, when u assume the worst of him even if it’s unconscious, because he opens himself to you, in his own way, he shows you who he truly is, so when u accidentally and unconsciously show somehow that u view him differently then what he desperately tries to show of himself it hurts him really bad. but he convinces himself that all those things that make him feel bad are fine, and that he doesn’t care, when it only make him bottle it all up until it eventually explodes. the same with the fact that your opinion matter too much to him, so feeling like he disappointed you or you’re not proud enough of him can make him overthink and just pull away which bothers you because u want him to talk about how he feels and it’s stressful when you don’t.

he hates arguments because it makes him feel like loving sometimes it’s not everything. it makes him overthink and doubt himself, like do you love him enough to stay? did he say or did something that finally made you realize he’s not worth staying for? It just creates so much doubt in him and doubt sucks when you love someone as much as he loves you, and loosing people has always been easier for him than keeping them because what could he possibly have in him that it’s good enough to make people stay as easily as they decide it isn’t worthy. and it’s so sad that he thinks because nath is like the coolest boy ever, he has so many interests that nobody knows of and u got to know and he’s so sweet and so attentive and you hate that he sees himself in such a bad light.

which takes me to making up. after arguing he gets anxious. he closes in on himself and simply pretends it doesn’t bother him, that it’s okay and that maybe you need space and the problem will fix itself. except this man does not sleep a bit at night. he’s just laying there thinking and thinking and thinking. he’s also pretends to not be hovering bus he’s waiting for you after class, he’s asking you unnecessary questions during class you know damn well he knows the answers to just to check how pissed you still are. and after a while, he will just come up to you looking miserable and dive into your arms and start apologizing into your neck. and it’s so sad it would be cruel to not forgive him right then and there. he’s just kissing all over your face and apologizing, “I’m sorry baby”, “I promise I’ll tell you how i feel more everyday” “That’s definitely lie” “Maybe, but I’ll try! I swear!”, and when u simply grab his worried face and kiss him properly any anger left just melts away immediately.

funny thing is hell looked like a kicked puppy for the next few days and you better reassure him everytime that you aren’t mad anymore and that it’s fine, and that you forgive him and he’s a great boyfriend, otherwise he’ll have that sad expression for a while until he convinces himself you’re actually on good terms now.

✧. - ̗̀ LYSANDER . . .

the most mature of them all. he’s so deeply patient it’s really hard to piss him off in general, so imagine with you. lys never gets angry at you, it’s really for him to do so because he loves you so much he struggles to stay mad. he’s human, he obviously gets angry sometimes but it never lasts long because you two always find a way to communicate during them or if you fail to, he waits for you to cool off so he can gently approach you after and properly talk to you about what bothered him, listen to you to know what bothers you, to pay attention and actually remember that to not do it again.

one of the very few things that make him sad, not mad, sad, is not feeling cared for. he’s very attentive. lys is so in love with you, he constantly makes sure to always do the right thing. to listen to your needs, to be thoughtful, to put you before others as his partner, to constantly reassure you and make you feel like what you are: someone he’s in love with you. just trying to cultivate the relationship everyday in little ways, and when he doesn’t feel loved back in that same intensity, then he feels hurt because it makes him think he’s the only one trying and he needs back that kind of love that he shows to you constantly, so that happening is something that hurts him. or another particular thing he hates, is if you put someone before him. he’s not toxic, he encourages every other relationship you have, but if he knows for sure (considering what we all know that he’s a very jealous guy) that a guy is crossing a line, or that he’s very obviously flirting with you and you defend them to him, even if it’s not like fully, just the implication that you’re making him feel like he’s overreaction and the interaction wasn’t like that when they clearly were interested in you, makes him feel like you’re not giving him the place he deserves as your partner and it hurts him because yours, and he makes that very clear, so why can’t you do that for him as well?

during arguments he’s very gentle. he’ll ask to talk, he’ll voice out to you everything that he didn’t like. hes not embarrassed or troubled at all with sharing his feelings. he’s actually very open about them and doesn’t shy away from telling u when he’s sad, to cry a bit because he gets emotional when it really hurts him, to tell you it made him feel bad. and it’s something u appreciate so much because he’s very private, he’s very hard to read, and you get the privilege of being someone he feels comfortable enough to open up to, and to freely speak about how he feels and you make him feel safe too, and he appreciates that too. a lot.

so yes. he’s definitely very good at communicating. he also very rarely allows you or allows himself to go too long without apologizing. he will respect fully your time if you want space, i you want to talk, if you want to be heard, whatever it is, he can do it for you. he feels really guilty when he goes too far sometimes during arguments, which rarely happens but sometimes he gets too lost in his own feelings that he doesn’t realize he might be asking you for too much. and that’s when he immediately apologizes first.

he hates sleeping after a fight. absolutely hates it. even if you both decide to continue the conversation tomorrow because you're exhausted, he'll still pull you into his arms before bed and press a kiss into your hair. he also loves hearing your perspective. genuinely. even when it hurts. because for him, understanding you is more important than being right. he'll ask questions. these are some of the things he does after a fight after apologizing because he believes the aftermath of showing you his love is not conditional to wether he was angry at your or not. another thing about him is that as observant as he is, you cannot pretend you’re not mad anymore when you actually are. he’s very good at noticing your moods, and therefore, he can easily tell when you’re saying it’s fine but it’s not really fine.

“something’s bothering you”

“not it’s not, i told you im fine”

“baby”

“talk to me”