#luvpogl

Now it seems to me tumblrs, Saturday night around here has been missing some spice for a while now. And while I ain't quite up on the modern stylings of all you Cholos and Chicanas; the old Katz I ran with all new, Saturdays were the night to show the world how gorgeous that special lady on your are is. And the only close thing we could find to stand next to her shine, was a classic called the "zoot suit" while we danced all night....

Now I ain't 100%, but I am fairly certain that's the lead Chicano Mr. Edward James Olmos. And when he asks to stand and deliver, WE listen. Viva La Rasa!

https://tidal.com/album/29028416

                                “MY LAST PIECE”

[I wrote this while listening to @taylorswift ‘s https://youtu.be/DUnDkI7l9LQ . P.S., It’s the most beautiful song I’ve ever heard her voice in].

You need not speak, I held you in the silence.

You need not speak, I held you in the quiet torment we, and death witnessed.

You need not speak, I held you softly as you grieved the things you could not explain,

You need not speak, I remember everything.

You need not speak, I held you closer as the tears soaked my shoulder.

You need not speak, I watched as angels’ tears wiped away the children’s fears.

You need not speak, I mixed you a drink as it was part of the job no one can forget.

You need not speak, when ur eyes cry; mine do too.

You need not speak, because I’ve given you a second to breathe doesn’t mean I’ve forgot ‘bout you.

                                                   “Tin Man”

I think I had a thought, but the more I thunk, a thought it was not.

So I took a broom to that rumored room of ruminations to knock down all the cobwebs left by those evil empty thoughts; I think, I thunk, I thought.

And then I sat down on this stump to reflect of these things I think I thought and thunk and thunk and thunk. 

In contemplation of these agitations I realized it was not from up top, that was causing this mess of thoughts.

In retrospection on invention of those evil thoughts, it seems emotive motives of emotions were at the core of my faults. 

Causing this bump to pound in my chest; thump, thump, thump and jumble up those thoughts I think I thunk.

It was spells from hell being cast upon my heart by that gal. 

SHE was making all those nasty thoughts; “I Love You’s, I Love You Knot and other what nots”.

So I got my axe to show that empty pounding mass who was boss, once and for all. 

I swing, swang and swung until there was nothing more to chop. Carving those pesky affections out one by one, until there were none.

And when I sat back down to rest, well that’s when I noticed the shape of her hands made a hole in my chest. 

For all the thoughts I think I thought I had thought were poured out into her arms, only to be laughed at and torn apart.

In speculation of this meditation I could only deduce...what is love, but a broken heart? (Or “After all, love is nothing but a broken heart?).

But all that did was push those sinister thoughts down to my chest, into my heart.

And he stepped out onto the stage the crowd began to shout; screaming at the top of their lungs "JIM! JIM! DO THE LIZARD KING AGAIN!!"

He reached for the mic; and greeted the crowd "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT?" The crowd roared out of control. Pushing their ego's a bit more, he yelled "THIS WHAT YOU WANT, BOYS & GIRLS? YOU'VE COME TO SEE A SHOW OF IMPERSONATIONS; FUCK A FEAST OF FRIENDS, HUH?! He laughed" They began to edge closer to the stage, crowd mentality took over and he kept playing to it. "WADDYA THINK ROBBIE; GIVE 'EM WHAT THEY WANT? DANCE AND SING LIKE SOME PLASTIC PUPPETS; PLACATE THE IGNORANCE?" he sneered back at the band.

Robbie's bottle neck began to slide and the guitar started to pick up with L.A. Women, John Densmore kicked in the with the rhythm of drums taunting the crowd more and more. Anticipation building as Ray Manzarek started in with that unique organ sound, the band was becoming more known for. Not bad for some kids out of film school in UCLA he thought. The music picked up urging Jim to begin the song; but he held the silence longer, acting as though thought and trance had somehow shifted him away from any stage performance.

As the music continued a silence came across the crowd, only an occasional voice yelling "I LOVE YOU JIM" peppered even more randomly with "PASS HIM THE JOINT". Brought back from the journey his mind had taken him down, the band began to run through the progression of opening chords for a third time. Walking to the front of the stage he looked back at Ray and said "My Wild Love".

He walked to the front of the stage, his boots hanging just over the of the cliff when a woman handed him a finely wrapped cigarette filled with weed. He reached down to take it from her, she grabbed back at him trying to pull him into the crowd. Laughing as he regained his balance; he looked at the joint and smiled "Man, you can tell that's a New York joint all right, wrapped as skinny as a toothpick and over tight." The crowd was mixed with boos and cheers as he lit the left handed cigarette and took his first hit.

The band started softening the music hoping to signal him to move into the set, confused by why he was playing with them more than usual instead of starting the show. Just as the music got to it's softest point he shrilled "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT NEW YORK?! MR. MOJO RISING! A CRAWLY KING SNAKE FOR YOUR PET?! They picked up enthusiasm a bit but even by know they were getting stale from excitement. "THE LIZARD KING! MORE OF MY COCK?!" he shouted back as he took another hit from the cigarette.

"NOT TONIGHT HE SCREAMED; I GOT BIGGER THINGS PLANNED". The fans went crazy and the band took the cue that things were back on track. "I GOT BIGGER THINGS TO DO THAN PLAY PUPPETS WITH YOU" he slammed the mic into the stage and took a final puff before flicking the joint back in the audience. Walking off stage, the silence deafened the auditorium as everyone wondered what was going on - as the mumbles started amongst the crowd, the house announcer came out and said "Ladies and gentlemen, they'll be no show tonight". Boos began to take over and riots broke out in the crowd becoming directed at the police as they tried to get the band out.

Jim, made his way to the dressing room and grabbed Pam's hand; leaving rubber on the street as his Shelby darted off to the Catskills. She asked him quietly in the car "What happened?" He looked over with the devilish grin; and said nothing; they wanted a puppet show and I wanted to tel you a story about a boy and girl instead".

[I don't usually write much on this page, but tonight 4 U, I thought I might share this rough draft that is itching to get out]

"Safe & Sound"

I've journeyed many leagues

and countless fortnight's on this quest.

Through the depths of ruin & despair;

searching the shadows of Misty Mountain lands.

Looking for a heart so pure;

worthy of an Elven princesses hand so fair.

Often the soft voice of her beating heart,

was what kept me safe & sound through Mordor's night.

When one perilous night,

By the might of an axe my life was spared;

from Ringwraith's wrapped in black.

Kindred by the name of Durin

was the noble dwarfs fame,

who wielded that weapons name.

Later that night by the fire,

we talked while passing a Hobbit's pipe.

He told me he once knew of a love so true,

but grabbed at his chest l, while his heart sunk

and face grew dim.

He revealed it had been severed by the hands of Sauron none the less.

Reaching down deep from his breast,

he pulled out an ornament and handed it me.

Forged from the finest mithril he promised;

so strong it could never be broke.

He asked that I take it since is true love was long lost.

And with that I saw a tear run down the blade of his axe.

I put my arm around him and said "Dwarves don't cry my friend."

To which he looked up with a grim reply and said; "it's only a bit of rain you see, fallen on this blade good man."

And with a final toke of that Hobbit's smoke and a swig of the finest ale;

I told him not to worry, I would tell no other tale.

Returning to the knees of Rivendell,

I felt myself at peace as I drove to Elrond's hall.

In his private council I did press,

to which he inquired the meaning of this?

Saying nothing as I approached...

...and stood in solemn earnest at Arwens' feet.

And on bended knee, with head down low,

I lay down the sword of Anduril, and offer to her this heart of true-silver! Stronger than pure than gold.

A simple poem,

a simple plan,

just to tell you;

“Happy Valentine’s,

 I’ll never let go,

                                                 “The Kiss”

He’d sat in this very spot before, but something was different this time. Something inside of him kept jumping out wanting to scream “please, don’t leave”. The others could come and go with no emotion. There was nothing left in him to hurt anyway, but SHE made it different. 

As she stood with her hand on the door ready to walk out, he knew if she left she’d take the last of his heart with her, there’d be nothing left. He hated feeling like this, something having so much control over his soul. 

He stood up and reached behind her stopping the door from opening any further so she couldn’t leave. Not like this, he just couldn’t let this one walk away like the rest.

He stared past her shoulders to the floor behind her and whispered “please” as she pulld the knob more firmly against the resistance of his hand. “Don’t go, not like this, not at all. I’m sorry” he continued. The emptiness of silence filled the space between them as she took a moment to sop up the serious tone in his voice.

She tossed her head back with a sigh of hesitation under her breath turned around with her eyes closed slamming her shoulders back into the door slamming it shut. The sudden move caught him off guard forcing him to catch his composure as he stumbled into her. 

Stopping himself just inches from her, she opened her eyes with and glared deep and cold into the bottom of his soul forcing out the words “I’m not like them and I never will be”. She rolled her eyes away from his and refocused her stare to a distant point on the wall behind them as she crossed her arms.

He moved his hand from the door and slid it into his left pocket. His voice broken and softened from the pain he made, he said “ I know, I know and I’ll never be THEM.

He continued to ramble “I know.” with frustrated hesitation he continued, “I know dammit, you’ll never be them. That’s why, that’s why...” fear stops him and silence blankets the air between them. “Just; what?” she whispered past his ear staring behind him.

“It’s just, I love you” he says softly into her lips. He’d never said that to any woman before, none of them could pull something like that out of him before. It wouldn’t work for him in his professional world that goverened his personal life all too much, but in this second he didn’t care what anyone but her thought.

He stood silently closing his eyes with a wince waiting to be slapped with the fragments of battlefield ammunition he’d been hit with too many times before. After the seconds turned into hours he reluctantly opened his eyes to see why she had not walked away yet.

He noticed her posture becoming less frigid as she contemplated if it was sincerity in his voice or just stumbling over words and ideas of things he thought she wanted to hear.

She looks at him with a harsh silence, the emotion in her lips has shifted to cold anticipation thinking to herself “This is the bullet her mom had warned her about”. He finally broke the silence again “I know it’s crazy, but it always just leads to you, the hate, the lies, the sacrifice - all goes away when the image of you touches my heart.” She stopped him with her finger and said “shut up and kiss me”. Maybe the embrace would help her decide if he was serious or not she thought.

He leaned in stopping just before their mouths touched and said “Let’s not have a last kiss ever, but especially not like this”. He ran his fingertip across her lips and continued; 

“You know it’s not just kissing you.” 

“It’s sweeping my fingers down the side of you cheek.” 

“It’ s letting my fingertips dance down the side of your neck and watching as they cue your head to tilt.”

“It’s feeling the slight gasp of air as your lips purse from the caress of my hand across the small of your back, pulling you in”

“It’s the soft song of ‘I Love You’ falling from my lips before I hug your bottom lip.”

“It’s the softness in your eye’s and your body’s sigh as our souls submit to each others love.”

                                                    “IF”

FUCK! FUCK! FUck! Why did Lionel do it? Misery does love company they say, but did he really have to take it this far? I mean, what if Motherless was right? “ What if we can’t understand the puzzle of “if”? 

A small line that could have been left out of the script with no effect, but thrown in at the hands of a tormenting writer just to FUCK with the minds of some of us. For the last two week all I think is maybe Motherless is right! “IF! makes no damn sense. It’s just a puzzle of struggle and strife.”

All right here’s the discussion, I’ll share it and maybe some of you insane insomniacs could help us solve it - that bastard Essrog, they should have left him in the boys home to rot…

Those two letters “I”; a selfish little bastard by himself and “F”; the begining of 10,000 sins, Fondle, Fornicate & Fuck. Of course without them I would have no Future, so we can’t just toss them out. 

Oh IF you conditional little bitch, two letters so full of contingencies it makes us sick: “If you do this, then I’ll do that, how can you put such stipulations on relationships?” Or “IF” we could go to Mars we could destroy that planet too, and “if” not maybe we could just contain the ignorance to Earth - “Destruction BAD; Money Good, Kids. Unless if the destruction is done for good purpose.

I mean if we just tossed out “IF” there’d be less “shoulda”, “coulda” and “woulda’s” taking away most regrets. Love wouldn’t have to be so hard aways wondering if she’s being faithful, or if he really likes her or is he just concerned with how good she looks in a skirt. 

Oh, “IF” you fickle litte bitch, I love her, but what if he’s cheating; planting seeds of doubt that have sprouted so many wars throughout the world. What if the DACA immigrants use up all our resources? Better to just shut and lock the door than worry about it, but what if they just dig tunnels under the wall? 

And what if Trump really was a good guy —- O.K., O.K. “IF” Trumps’ dictatorship is not your fault, but what if we ever got a candidate who truely cared about making changes and not just playing political games - you mean like Trump (oh, shut up brain that’s a different argument).

Oh wait, there is a positive of if, but it’s covered by hope, so, IF, you’re still on the chopping block. Without you too then we’d have NO IFs ANDs or BUTs about it! Everything would be more concrete like your cousin “IS” assures us.

IS, now there is a puzzle piece we can sink our teeth into. At lease with IS we can underastand things for certain, thereby removing doubt. “It is love, or it is not - no question and no hearts played with, broke or lost”. And if it IS, then she’s hot and if it is not then, oh well her loss (and she wouldn’t have to be alone loving herself). 

Trump IS our president so we should support him out of respect due the office, but his foreign policy IS not anything we should stand for as American’s.

How long do I really need to go on with this? If I wrote a 100 pages maybe it would make my points more clear, but we’d still be no closer to solving it. Or maybe just one or two would do since there IS no part of the puzzle “IF” really fits.

And what kind of God would do this to us? IF we do these things HE will show us favor and IF NOT against us HE will bring His wraith (or wrath?). I mean if you ask me just giving us the word “IF” is hell enough. 

This whole time part of my brain is arguing the pro’s and con’s of some damn two letter word to itself, another wondering if I turned the coffee pot off, another trying to reassure myself I’ll make it to the bus on time and still a final analyzing the probability of whether she couwreally love me or not.

You see there kids the whole mess Lionel has gotten us into? Before this here I never thought two seconds about if, but when you really uncover the evil nature of it you see how sinister it is. I mean just how committed can one be with a word like “IF” in their vocabulary?

I told you they should have just kept Motherless locked up.