Today was a brain-fuzzy day.
The kind of day where I can’t get out of bed or make a decision about anything — but my brain somehow feels both dizzy and heavy at the same time. It’s honestly hard to be productive when my brain acts like this, but it’s also dangerous to be around people, since I wouldn’t be able to keep track of things or my surroundings.
With my car in the shop, I feel like I have an excuse to not be around people.
I guess a way to explain this is that many of my brain functions — around planning, decision-making, working memory, and emotional regulation — are all running on low battery mode. So I’m not able to function fully, which means super easy foods, lots of rest, and watching shows that don’t require a lot of processing ability… like corny harem anime.
Though I actually had a lot I was planning to do today, like posting about “what my last 14 days have been like on my content creation journey,” or “the accommodations I’ve given myself as an AuDHDer.” Those will have to wait until tomorrow. I’ll at least write up this journal entry, because I wanted to post something blog-like today.
On the topic of my last 14 days with content creation, I can tell I’m actually struggling a bit — and that has a lot to do with how my brain works. Things just take longer for me to complete. Doing face-showing videos feels so uncomfortable that I wish I could bury myself, but the administrative work — like writing scripts, looking up information, and analyzing data — has been quite fulfilling.
It makes me think I might be more suited to social media managing than content creation… but I still want to keep growing and learning.
Over the next 14 days, I’d like to work on making my content more engaging — or at least improving my video hooks so that my content can generate more interest. This seems to be more of an issue on Western apps than on Eastern ones.
I hope this new year will ignite a greater spark — to give me a chance to improve myself and find the stability I’ve been craving.
