I have finally begun typing the second book, Looking for the Light.  Finally.  I actually took so long to start that I have rewritten most of what I had on paper.

On the up(?)side, I found the easiest way to write Eli is to seriously be on the verge of tears while wondering what your life is worth.  Is this the author's version of method acting?

The members of the Spetsgruppa Drakon Pushki stood by as Eli said good bye to his brother.  The three of them work their dress uniforms as they stood on the marble floor of London’s St. Pancreas station.  Gregori and Vikenti both stood tall in their black suit jackets, black pants and polished black shoes.  Their grey shirts were pressed, and their red ties, knotted neatly.  

Viktoriya’s hair was brushed to a jet black shine, and then twisted and tied at the back of her head.  Her makeup was applied neatly and subdued, her lips still painted red, and her eerily light eyes rimmed in black, but her eye shadow was a tame shade of brown.  Viktoriya wore her black jacket and trim skirt, grey blouse and red tie.  Her black heels were polished to a shine, and she held the leads of Ceres and Dinah in her gloved hand.

Eli was rarely the most casually dressed in a group.  He wore his favorite oxblood shirt and black tie with a pair of grey slacks tailed to his legs.  He hugged Levi good bye, as Lin stood behind them.

“Are you sure about this, Eli?” Levi patted his little brother on the back.

“I already sold my Benz and gave up my lease.  All my clothes and books are in those bags.  I’m sure, Levi.” Eli told him.  He wore a smile, but his eyes searched the station.

“I sent the message to her, Eli.  I didn’t get anything back.” Levi told him, meeting his brother’s eyes.  

While Valentina had completely walked out on Eli, she’d kept contact with Levi.  When Eli decided to leave his apartment, he’d asked Levi to let Valentina know that he was moving, and selling anything he wasn’t required to give back or needed to take with him.  Is she had left anything behind, that it would be her last opportunity to get it.  After that, he’d asked Levi to send a message to let her know that he was leaving London, and England all together, and it would be her last opportunity to see him.  She was noticeably absent.

“I guess you were wrong, Levi.  It wasn’t love.  I don’t know what it was, but it wasn’t love.” Eli shook his head with a sigh.

“I thought it was. I don’t know who sits by a hospital bedside for eight weeks, and then walks out over a night out.  I even told her that you didn’t do anything.  I don’t know what happened, Eli.  But you deserve better.” Levi shrugged.

“I know.  I’m still broken hearted over it, but I’m moving on.  We’re going to start getting active with this investigation. This is…  This is the right thing to do.  This is what I am meant to do.  And I think these are the people I’m meant to do it with.” Eli told him.  His brother was starting to tear up.

“Good luck, Eli.  I’m going to miss you.   I love you.” Levi pulled him in for another hug.

“Thanks.  I’ll miss you too.  And I love you.  Good luck with Lin.  And I’ll try to come home for New Year’s.”  Eli promised as he hugged him back.  Levi nodded as they parted. 

Eli didn’t look back as he walked back to Viktoriya, Vikenti and Gregori.  He wanted to look back at Levi, but he was afraid if he did, he wouldn’t have the courage to get on the train.  Viktoriya handed the leads over and gave him a smile.  She looked beautiful in her dress uniform, and if he hadn’t already seen it, he’d never think that she might have a tattoo spanning her entire left arm.

“Ready to go, Coates?” She asked. The other men boarded ahead of them.

Eli gathered the courage to look back at Levi and Lin, at London, at the life he’d cowered from, run from, hid from, denied, sacrificed for, built, torn down and embraced.  He looked back to Viktoriya and nodded.  Eli had not held anyone’s hand in what seemed like an eternity, so he was surprised when he felt her hand slip into his.  

Mischa wandered the halls of the compound, smoking a cigarette.  He used to have to barter with the guards for them.  Now he merely need ask.  He occasionally tried to quit smoking, but with nothing to do, he always failed.  His longest success had been the four years he’d been in Valentina’s life.  Mischa had been enjoying a decent day, the food wasn’t over cooked in the commissary, one of the guards had gotten good enough at sambo to offer Mischa a challenge, and weather was warm, so he wasn’t surprised when he heard the clicking of heels around the corner.

“Where is he?” Solange put on a posh lit to her voice, trying to make herself sound more cultured than she was.  The act was in vain; neither Mischa nor Yuri spent enough time with a diverse enough British population to learn what the “rich accent” sounded like.  To each other, Mischa had a rural drawl and Yuri spoke with a Muscovite dialect – when Yuri was putting his words together properly, but the guards and Solange, they simply sounded Russian.

“Did you try his room?  Where you keep him?” Mischa turned to face her.  He didn’t flinch at the sight of Nishi laid over her shoulders.  He looked terrible with her slinky red dress and heels.  Solange had gotten another nose job, making her look pinched and distorted.  Her nose was too narrow, her lips were too fat, and she’d plucked her eyebrows to nothing.  Mischa did not know how decided on that face, but he wouldn’t have chosen it.

“Yes, I looked there.  He’s asleep on the bed and I can’t wake him up.  Where is he?” She swayed as she walked, shaking pair of fake breasts in his face.  Mischa rolled his eyes.

“I don’t know where he is. I’m not telepathic.  And even if I was, I wouldn’t just pop in on him, thanks to what you’ve done to him.  I don’t want to die.”  He blew smoke in her face.  As a younger man, Mischa had always prided himself of his chivalrous attitude toward women.  But Solange Marchand wasn’t a woman.  She was the devil in a woman’s skin. “What can you even want from us anyway?”

“Phillip is asking about his father again.  He wants to see him.  And I’ve been considering giving Phillip a brother.” She said after a pause, as if considering if Mischa even deserved an answer.

“I don’t think either of those choices is wise.” He warned, taking another drag off his cigarette.

“I didn’t come down here for your wise counsel, Mischa.” She sniped back.  As hideous as he found Solange’s alterations to her looks, they were made worse when she got mad.

“And I didn’t come here for the food.  Let us free and I won’t tell the Prizrak Rytsarya where I was.” Mischa always made the same offer, hoping she would take it.  She never did.

“Why would I do that?  You can’t break out and you have no place to go.” Solange sneered at him.  She tried to look down her increasingly shrinking nose at him, but he was a full foot taller than her.

“Why keep us? You have to feed and guard us.  You pay doctors to keep us well.  You pay for electricity to keep this place lit.  And for what?  What do you gain by keeping us here?” Mischa always asked that too.  He never understood his capture; he didn’t consider himself that valuable of a bargaining chip.  He definitely wasn’t worth dying over, but just the same, four people were dead.

Solange met his eyes.  Her eyes were cold, blue and dead, with no emotion behind them.  She never gave Mischa an answer.  He was beginning to think she did have one.  That his imprisonment was one big temper tantrum gone out of control.  The worst Mischa had ever done to her was suggesting that Abraham Horowitz break off his engagement to her.  That was hardly worth commanding Yuri to kill Mischa’s wife.

“What would you even do if I let you free?” She said, as if Mischa would be at a loss.

“Wear a real pair of pants?” He shrugged. “I’d go home.  Tell my government that I’m not dead.  I’d visit Malena’s grave.  Find my daughter.  Try to put my life back together.  Help Yuri put himself back together.”

“You think Yuri’s allowed to go too? You’ll rush to your daughter’s arms, and take my son’s father away?” Solange sneered.

“Seems fitting, doesn’t it?  You took me away from Valentina when she was Phillip’s age.” Mischa kept his face stony.  Ultimately, if he and Yuri ever did get free, Yuri wouldn’t think twice of leaving Phillip.  He was too broken to even realize he had a son.  Or at least Mischa though that much.  Yuri never spoke of Phillip, or asked to see him.

“Phillip is the only thing I have.  And you would break his little heart?” Solange dared vilify Mischa.

“A fear of breaking hearts? It didn’t stop you from taking me from Malena and Valentina.  It didn’t stop you from taking Yuri from his brother.  It certainly didn’t stop you from killing the Petyr and Ivan Pajari, or Alexei Makismov, or Malena Sima.  If you have any heart left in that silicone filled chest, you’d open those doors and let Yuri and I walk free.”  Mischa was ready to take another beating.  They barely hurt any more, and it did nothing to him mentally.  He was beginning to hope for the day a guard would go too far and kill him, but they guards all either respected or feared him too much for that.

Solange rolled her eyes at him. “Russians and your drama.  You are giving me a headache.  All I hear is buzz buzz buzz.”  She turned on her heels and slipped away.  She walked right past Yuri’s door, completely forgetting what she came down the hall for.

In a small compound, word traveled quickly.  Mischa didn’t usually care much for gossip, but with Yuri asleep for the third week straight, he was bored.  He was leaving the gym passed two guards, and overheard part of their conversation.

“What did Miss Marchand need so urgently?  No one’s ever called up into the house.” The first guard asked.  He was a young man, they all were.  Mischa didn’t think there was a single guard over thirty.  This one was a blonde with freckles.

“She said we have a guest, and wanted to set up reorientation.  I don’t know why she suddenly needed me to retrain everyone.  There are only two of them.” The second guard said.  He had a shaved head and no eyebrows.

“Maybe it’s a nanny for PJ?  Someone to take care of her little burden?  You know she doesn’t let that kid’s feet touch the ground.  So what, was she just hiring some poor little French lady, so PJ could cry next to his father on someone else’s shoulder?” Freckles asked.

“No, PJ wasn’t with her, and I didn’t see any nanny.  It was a man.  Some friend of hers.  I tried to ask questions but she dismissed me.  She said she had a headache, and she was hearing buzzing in her ears.” Cueball told him.  Neither seemed aware Mischa was following them.

Mischa’s eyebrows came together in concern.  He started back toward the medical bay.  He pushed his way inside the medical bay, surprising a medic.  The medic dropped some glassware on the floor, shouting in anger.

Yuri lay in a bed, hooked up to an IV, just as they knew Elijah had been half a year ago.  He was pale, but Yuri was always pale.  His eyes moved rapidly under his closed lids.  Mischa ignored the medic and the broken glass as he went to Yuri’s side.  Suddenly, Yuri sat up and ripped the IV from his arm, his eye wide and wild. 

Mischa leaned in, about to calm Yuri when he heard the clicking of Solange’s heels across the floor.  She slunk into the room, with a smirk on her face.  It was a twisted thing across her lips.

“Oh good, you’re both here.  That saves me a time and wasted words.” Solange spit out at them.  This time she was wearing white dress that made her over tanned skin look like leather.  “We have another member of our family.”

The click of men’s shoes on the linoleum tiles of the hall outside of the medical bay echoed far ahead of him.  When the door opened, Mischa’s eyes met with the dull green eyes of an old friend.  Former friend.  Abraham Horowitz stood in front of them in a dark sweater over a white collared shirt and khakis.

Despite Colonel Lytton dropping his investigation, they were making remarkable progress.  Gregori and Vikenti had finished translating all the journals and documents they had found in Mischa’s apartment, Abraham Horowitz’s farmhouse, and their offices.  Eli was tearing through the translations faster than they could finish them.  Unfortunately, none of what they found pointed at who might have attacked Sima, or what their motivation might have been.

There wasn’t anything else in London that was going to help them find her cousin.  Well, that wasn’t completely true.  Eli was still there.  In his recent depression, he’d confided something in Viktoriya.  It was something they shared.

By then, he’d taking up smoking on his own.  Viktoriya was on her way to lunch when she found Eli waiting to cross the street, and lighting a cigarette.  She elbowed him playfully and held out her own unlit cigarette.  Eli gave her the best smile he could muster - which was less than a second of a barely upturned corned of his mouth, and lit her cigarette.

“Spasiba, Coates.  Where are you off to?” She crossed the intersection with him.  Since Valentina broke up with him three weeks ago, he’d retreated into his misery.  Eli started dressing in several layers every day, even in the late August heat.  He’d stopped eating lunch with her, unless Viktoriya asked him, and insisted.  Their signing lessons had all but been forgotten.

Eli shrugged, and let out a smoky sigh.  He raised his hands, as if he were about to sign to her, but paused, and after a moment, just took a drag off his cigarette.

“It’ll get better, Eli.  They say it takes as many weeks as you dated in months to get over some one.  And you hadn’t been dating that long.” Viktoriya tried to offer.

Eli just shook his head.  He didn’t want to talk about Valentina.  She wasn’t sure what he did want to talk about.  Before she could broach another topic, they were interrupted.  A man that was walking on the other side of Viktoriya had decided to help himself to a hand full of her behind.  As suddenly as it happened, Eli stepped in front of the man.

With his cigarette still poised between his fingers, he signed.  With both hands he made a pinching motion, between his index and thumb of his left hand, and index and middle finger together against his thumb in his right, the cigarette still held between them.  Eli moved his left hand to his temple, with his thumb against his middle and ring finger, other two extended he moved his hand out, and then made a fist with his left and extended his index and middle finger in the “K” hand signs as he brought his hand down on his flattened right palm.  He wore a protective anger on his face.

“Woah! Woah, dude!” The man backed away from Eli. “I didn’t know she was your girlfriend.  But I mean, look at her!”

Viktoriya’s outfit did draw attention, a pair of tight jeans and a white ribbed tank top.  Even though she wore a red zip-up sweatshirt over top, the sleeves pushed up to her elbow, her dark colored bra was visible through her shirt.  But just the same, she had dressed for comfort, not for show.

Eli made another fist with his left hand, and put it over his palm-down flat right and moved them apart, he tucked his thumb between ring finger and small finger, put his finger tips together, and finally moved his hands apart.  After a moment he held both hands up above his head, and with index and middle fingers crossed and ring and small fingers tucked behind his thumbs, and extended both arms away from his body.

Viktoriya was surprised by Eli’s defense of her.  She didn’t think he ever noticed her as a person, but maybe that’s all he ever saw her as.  She wasn’t just a woman, his boss, or his friend.  To Eli Viktoriya was all of those, and even more.  

While she marveled at his chivalry, the guy didn’t back down from Eli.  He stepped up to Eli, and got pushed back by the mute man in three piece navy suit over a lighter blue shirt.  The groper shoved Eli harder.  Eli threw a punch, knocking the man off his feet.  Before he could get to his feet, Eli was walking away, guiding Viktoriya away with an arm around her shoulders.

“Eli, you didn’t have to do that…” Viktoriya started.  He cut her off with a gesture pinching his index and middle fingers to his thumb together a few times.  He gestured back toward the man, repeated the pinching, freed both hands to point at his chest with index and middle fingers apart, and then touched his index fingers together at a right angle.

“I know, but you really didn’t…” Viktoriya tried again.  Eli stopped them.  He pointed at her, hooked his right finger and gestured down a few times, then raised both hands up with index fingers crossed over his middle fingers, the other fingers tucked between thumbs and moved his hands out into the air.  Viktoriya gave him a sad smile.  No one had ever defended her honor before, and the first person to do it was a man she’d only known for a few weeks.

She put her right hand to her lips and moved it out in an arch, away from her face. “Thank you, Eli.  You’re a good friend.  It’s a shame our works almost over.  We should have hung out more.”

Eli wore a look of confusion as he traced his right index finger over his left palm.

“We translated everything we found.  You and I combed through everything.  That’s it.  Dead end.” Viktoriya admitted.  Eli mirrored her unhappiness at the idea of their investigation coming to an end.

Eli pointed with both hands, crossing his fingers in front of his chest and then separating them, and pointed to his right shoulder and arced to his left.  He moved his index and middle fingers from his lips out, his ring finger touching his thumb, pinched his index and middle fingers to his thumb, and finished by placing both hands in front of his chest and turning them palms in to palms out.

“Eli, I don’t want to go back, but we have no proof that they are still alive.” Viktoriya hadn’t told him about her episodes.  Even she was beginning to doubt them.

Eli’s signs came quickly.  He was excited, desperate to tell her.  He was desperate for his loss to be in vain.  Eli pointed to himself, and then brought his right hand, flat to his head.  He pointed off into a vague direction, brought his index and middle finger to his lips again, and repeated the gesture from before.  Eli tucked his right hand inside his left, pulling it out like he was removing a handkerchief, and gestured his hand outward with his palm flat.  He pointed to himself again, extended all four fingers and his thumb tucked against his palm he brought it to his temple.  Viktoriya didn’t understand the last sign at first.  He had made the sign for speak, but not at his mouth.

“You communicated with Mischa telepathically?” Viktoriya was hopeful, and surprised even herself with her optimism.

Eli nodded, and made a “Y” hand sign at his forehead, and then made the “M” sign followed by rolling his wrist and bringing index finger to his thumb with other fingers extended.

“When did you talk to them?” Viktoriya tried to keep the excitement out of her voice.  She had thought she was special, to receive contact from Yuri Utkin, and she still thought she was, but now she wasn’t alone.  She wasn’t jealous that Yuri had also his mind in Eli’s head.

Eli signed slowly for her, in a combination of finger spelling and signed words.  He finger spelled F-E-B and then A-P-R-I-L, then a W from his lips to his cheek, C-O-M-A.  He pointed to himself, and closed his right hand over his face. He made a weird hand sign putting his middle finger to his thumb, with the other fingers extended, and with his right index finger extended, he moved his hand toward her across his left hand.  Y fingerspelling at his forehead – Yuri, and Eli rolled his wrist, putting his index finger to his thumb, with his other fingers extended.  With the same hand shape, he made it with his left too, and gestured with his hands on top of one another, like an old milk maid churning butter.

“You were in a coma?!” Viktoriya immediately felt bad, for the way the words came out.

Eli made a motion with his fist like knocking, with his thumb tucked under his curled fingers.

“That’s wonderful.” She paused at the confused look on his face. “No, not wonderful in that way.  Eli.  I mean to say, I am glad to hear that someone beside me had that experience.  It wasn’t a coma, and I don’t mean to say it’s the same.  Um… a little while ago, I would have these sleeping spells.  I would be out for days.  And I would hear voices.  They would tell me to go on this adventure, to find Yuri and Mischa.  I think that voice was Yuri.”

A smile broke out across Eli’s face.  He made the knocking motion again, pointed to himself, and patted his head.

“Eli, we’ll find them.  Besides, he won’t let me go for long without progress.” Viktoriya patted his shoulder.  Even through his jacket, she could feel his hard muscles.

Eli traced his right finger over his left palm.   He pointed with both hands, both thumbs extended as well, and tipped both wrists up.  Eli pointed at Viktoriya with a questioning look on his face.

“He hasn’t said anything lately” She shrugged.  “But if I’m idle for too long Yuri scolds me.”

He held out his hands, palms up wiggling his fingers.  She hadn’t seen him smile so wide since they first met.  Eli pointed to his chest with two fingers on each hand, and gestured from his temple out with the small finger of his right hand.  He was excited.  Eli could barely stand still.  He took a final drag off his long forgotten cigarette and threw it aside.  He traced his middle finger across his left hand, his thumb against his middle finger and his index finger extended.  He switched his fingers, extended his index finger and his thumb and made a circle around his mouth.  Eli casually shook his hands in front of his chest, crossed his wrists while making fists, his thumbs extended, then flattened his palms as his wrists passed back over each other.

Eli woke up with only hazy memories of his night before.  Valentina had left a bottle of aspirin and a glass of water out for him on the nightstand.  Or maybe had when Levi help Eli into his room.  Of course, Valentina wasn’t there when he woke.  He searched the apartment, before taking a lonely shower, dressed, took his dogs out, and then returned to the apartment to have breakfast.  Eli only had Ceres and Dinah to keep him company.  He had a headache, and had expected that, but the souring nerves in his stomach kept him from eating much.  The last time he’d felt this bad, they were on their way to Fairgarden.

He tried to relax himself.  Eli watched the second half of a movie on television, not caring as Dinah and Ceres sprawled out on the couch with him.  It was as if they could sense Eli’s mood.  Ceres would look up at him and nuzzle against his arm.  Dinah licked at his hand in hopes to cheer him up.  After two more hours, and another terrible movie, Eli forced himself off the couch.  He took the dogs for another quick walk, and then took a trip down to the property’s pool.  Eli had hoped swimming a few laps would clear his head, but it didn’t.  The thoughts preyed on his mind, worrying over where Valentina was, if she was okay, and why she hadn’t spoken to him since Friday night.

She still wasn’t home when he returned the pool.  After another shower, Eli dressed in a pair of sleep pants.  It was getting late, and he thought of ordering dinner, but his stomach still wasn’t with him.  After another walk with the dogs, and another movie, this time one of his choosing, Eli eventually decided to make himself some soup.  He was standing in the kitchen, naked to the waist, in his sleep wear, stirring a pot of condensed soup at eight in the evening.  That’s when Valentina arrived home.  She didn’t meet his eyes.

“Where have you been?  I was worried.” He asked, but his telepathy hit a wall.  Eli found that being forced out of some one’s mind gave him a headache.  And being shut out of your girlfriend’s mind gave him heartache.  He turned off the burner on the stove, and trailed her as Valentina ignored him on her way to their bedroom.  This felt familiar.  He’d done this before, just not with Valentina.

“Would you stop following me?!” Valentina shouted at him.  He’d cornered her in the bedroom, though he hadn’t meant to.  Eli only wanted her attention.

He tried to speak, mentally, but she was resisting.  And she didn’t know sign language.

“Don’t you get it, Elijah?  I don’t want to be around you right now.  I only came to get some clothes.”  Valentina’s tone was venomous.

He held out his hands to echo the confusion Eli wore on his face.  Valentina shook her head and staring looking for her bag in the closet.  He was still watching her when she returned.

“What? God, Eli, I didn’t want to do this now!” She sighed.  Valentina walked to the end of the bed and sat down.  “I want you to quit your work for the CIA and the Russians.”

“Why would I do that?” He asked, surprised to be let in.  “Things are going well.”

“Because, I don’t want you working with them anymore.  I don’t want to see my father’s memory tarnished by this ridiculous investigation.  Just let him rest in peace, please.” Valentina pleaded.

Eli was genuinely confused.  Her words seemed to come out of nowhere.  “Valentina, I know he’s out there.  I’ve spoken to him.  Mentally, yes, but I have spoken to him.  Don’t you want your father in your life?”

“I have a father, and he’s the one I spent my weekend with.  He might not be my biological father, but he’s the one I’ve got!” Valentina raised her voice to him.

“It was Colonel Lytton that recruited me for this assignment, Valentina.  He wants my help to find Captain Sima.” Eli tried to remain calm.  They only thing he feared more than how this conversation was going to end, was the idea of hurting Valentina along the way.

“He is pulling his support tomorrow.  And if you love me, you will too!” Valentina threatened.

“Valentina! What has gotten in to you?!” Eli got to his knees on the floor to meet her eyes.  “I thought this is what you wanted.  You’ve been looking for him since before we knew who he really was!”

“Have I?  I was just trying to write my paper.  It was you that lured me into helping translate those journals.  And then you made me start devoting school time to it! Then we were driving to crazy people’s houses! Eli, this is going to get you killed! This will get me killed! You have to stop, or we have to stop!” Eli was sure their neighbors could hear Valentina’s voice.

“We need to stop?  What is that supposed to mean?  Are you going to break up with me if I don’t quit my job?” Eli asked, dumbfounded.  He couldn’t believe the situation he found himself in.

“I should break up with you over a lot of things, Eli.  Lying to me, taking advantage of me, putting me in danger.” Valentina stood up, pushing at Eli’s shoulders as she got to her feet.  He fell back and scrambled to stand up.

“When did I lie to you?  When did I take advantage of you? And when did I knowingly put you in danger?” Eli was getting defensive.  He was now actively holding himself back.

“Are you going to give your notice tomorrow or not?  Can you give up your little fantasy about being the shining knight?” She spit at him, ignoring his question.  Eli was appalled at her behavior.  It was her voice, and her face, but something felt so wrong.  Or maybe he was just already missing her.

“There is not fantasy about being a knight.  Valentina, I’m doing this for you.  So that you can have your father back in your life.  So that a man can live free, and not in a prison.  To ease Colonel Lytton’s guilt.  It’s the right thing to do.  And I’m not going to stop.”  He left her mind before he could shut him out.  He didn’t need to hear her say those next words.  He knew what was coming.  It was like taking a punch to the nose with your eyes wide open.  The pain came before impact.

“Good bye, Elijah.  Don’t call me.  I’ll send someone for my things.”  Valentina sneered at him before storming out.  The door slammed.  Eli was alone.  He was in shock.  He wasn’t sure how things had gotten to this point.

Eli and his brother sat at a table trying to carry on a conversation, but the younger Coates brother could not stop watching the door.  Every time the bell above the pub’s entrance rang, Eli’s gaze went to it.  Dinner had come and gone, as had their first and second rounds.  Valentina wasn’t here yet.  He hadn’t seen her all day.  She was ignoring his messages too.  Eli had already thought about, agonized over, and washed his hands of the idea that he’d done something to offend her.  Now he was just worried.

The door opened, and the crowd parted to let the new comers in.  Viktoriya Sima and her entourage were unmistakable.  Gregori stood a good head above anyone else in the bar.  Eli caught glimpses through the crowd of Viktoriya’s face.  She wore an expression of nerves and hopes, wondering if she was in the right place.  A moment of vulnerability on her otherwise calm exterior.

At first he didn’t think she looked much different than what he normally saw her as.  Her ice-and-violet eyes were rimmed in black, and shadowed in a smoky grey, and her lips were painted a dark red.  Her dark hair was tied up, off her neck.  As Eli got up to meet his guests, he noticed Viktoriya’s clothes.  She wore an oversized thin electric blue tee shirt over what he’d first thought was a black skirt, but turned out to be a strapless dress.  She’d turned to ask Vikenti something, just before Eli approached giving him a view of the curious twist in the back of her tee shirt, and showing off her well-formed muscular back and shoulders.

Eli tapped her on the arm to get her attention, then smiled.  He waved them made each of their name signs, “V” down the left arm for Viktoriya, making the sign for “G” with each hand and gesturing from his chest, circling out for Gregori and a “V” straight down his chest for Vikenti. Eli moved his open palm toward his chest twice, and then held both hands at his chest level and pointed down.

“Eli, thank you for inviting us!” Viktoriya leaned in to say.  She smelled like cigarettes and an alluring perfume.  Eli wasn’t sure what is was, but he liked it. “I was nearly dead of boredom!”

Eli gestured from his forehead with his right hand in a loose fist, his thumb extended and brought it down to meet his left hand with both index fingers and thumbs extended, and then gestured back toward Levi.

“Guys, over here.  Eli and his brother have a table.”  Viktoriya kept a hand on Eli’s shoulder as they edged through the crowd back to the where Levi was sitting.  After introductions were made and drinks were ordered, Viktoriya leaned in again, “Valentina’s not here?”

Eli tapped his index and middle finger together twice, and shook his head.  He shrugged with palms up.  He wish he had something to tell her, and hoped Viktoriya didn’t think it was any reflection on herself.

“It’ll be a good time, just the same.” She assured him, patting his arm.

Once the drinks had arrived, all worries were forgotten.  Eli quickly learned that one of the things Viktoriya did in her free time was dance, and once she found out that the DJ took requests, she only left the dance floor for another drink.  A few times she brought Eli out onto the dance floor with her, and he didn’t mind too much.  Viktoriya wasn’t flirting with him, she danced with Gregori and Vikenti too.  She was just looking to have a fun night out.  It was well after midnight when she snuck up on Eli checking his phone.

“I’m going outside for a cigarette… Are you okay, Eli?”  Viktoriya asked.  They were both passed drunk and on their way back to sober.  Alcohol only served to stave off their hangovers at that point in the evening.

He nodded, and signed to her.  He pointed at himself, then at the door with both hands, made two fists with his hands together, and pointed at her.  Still a little tipsy, Viktoriya didn’t understand at first.  He simplified the message by offering his arm to her and gesturing to the door with his head.  She got the idea this time, and took his arm.

Out in the cold of the evening, Eli watched her light up a cigarette.  He sat down a bench, and was surprised when she sat down beside him.  Viktoriya offered him the cigarette, and after a moment of hesitation he took a drag.  She laughed as he coughed.

“That was your first, wasn’t it?” Viktoriya’s tattooed hand plucked the cigarette back out of his hand. “I hope you didn’t do that just so I would think you are cool.”

Eli shook his head, and took his phone out again.  He had no messages waiting for him.  He hadn’t missed any, and the last he’d received had been from Gregori asking for directions.  He made a “V” over his heart, pinched his index and middle finger to his thumb again, and then made a motion like he was texting on his phone.

“Are you in a fight?” She let out a smoke ring, and then blew a plume of smoke through the ring.

Eli shook his head no.  He shrugged again, looking confused.

“Eli, I’m sure it’s nothing.  She’s probably asleep already.” Viktoriya tried to give him a smile.  Eli took the cigarette again, and this time didn’t choke as he inhaled.  She shook her head as she warned. “Those things are a nasty habit.”

Eli laughed to himself, only signaling his amusement to Viktoriya by blowing smoke out of his nose. She laughed with him, and patted his knee.  Viktoriya lit another cigarette, letting Eli keep the first one. They sat in silence as they finished.  Both butts were dropped on the pavement and stamped out by Viktoriya’s black pumps.  Eli noticed the electric blue bottom to her heels.

When she looked back at him he caught her gaze.  Her eyes were mesmerizing.  He’d never seen eyes like hers, a purple ring around a nearly clear blue iris.  After a moment, Viktoriya looked away.

“We should get you home, Eli.”  Viktoriya got to her feet, stumbling in her heels for a moment.  Eli stood up and caught her before she fell.  She laughed as she regained her balance. “Let’s get you back to your brother.  I have a feeling he’s taken a drunken Eli home before.”

The fourth floor was almost completely empty as Valentina walked the hall to Dr. Utkin’s office.  It was still early.  She hadn’t even woken Eli before she left.  She was sure Eli would have objected to her going to see Dr. Utkin, even if it wasn’t about Eli’s academic career.  She had woken with a dull headache – still yet to subside, and didn’t want to deal with the fight or the lecture that was sure to follow if he knew where she was going.

The click of her heels echoed down the hall.  Valentina tried to quiet her footsteps, but there was nothing for it.  She hesitated before knocking on Dr. Utkin’s door.  Valentina reminded herself that she was doing this for her father.  Dr. Utkin might be her last opportunity to know him.  She summoned her courage and rapped on the door.

“Come een.” Utkin called from inside.  Valentina had only met him once before – when Utkin had interrupted their party, and he made her nervous.  His eyes studied her, judged her, and it felt like he could see into her soul.  Utkin looked far older than his age, perhaps he was worn down by the trials and stress of his life.  “Please, Mees Leeton, have seat.”

Valentina’s stomach had gone sour with nerves and for a moment she saw a ghost image of Eli sitting in the offered chair.  He looked younger, not yet needing his glasses, or marred with the fine scar near the hair line on his left temple that only she could notice.  He balanced his books on his knees, dressed in his usual Victorian Era finery.  Valentina cleared her vision with a long blink, and sunk into the chair. “Thank you for seeing me, Dr. Utkin.  I know you are very busy preparing for next year’s class.”

“So many appleecants, so few quality candideets.”  Utkin smiled at her.  “I sense you are not here to talk about class.  Your mind is heavy.”

“Yes, I’ve been thinking about my father – my biological father.” She told him. “There’s so much talk about him recently, and I know so little about him.  I wanted to know… I mean, I was hoping that you could tell me about him.”

“Ah, yes.  Captain Sima is a popular topic right now.  He was a great man.  Sima was brave, cunning, cautious, everything you would want to see in an officer.” Utkin told her, always referring to her father in the past tense.

Valentina nodded.  She started to feel pressure behind her eyes.  Mentally, she cursed Eli for talking her into opening that bottle of wine the night before.  She was jealous of him, getting to sleep off his hangover in bed while she was awake and in a meeting.

“As proud as I was to serve your father, he was too curious.  You have heard the expression, ‘Curiosity killed the cat.’ Da?”  Utkin joked.  Her ears acclimated to his accent, and Valentina no longer heard the oddities in his words. “Captain Sima was the cat.  Colonel Lytton and I tried to stop him many times, but he was stubborn.”

Valentina nodded.  She tried to push through her headache and focus on Dr. Utkin’s stories.  There was much to learn from him.  From everything she had been told, Anton Utkin had been her father’s right hand in the years before his death.  She could not afford to miss a detail.

“For all his tactics, his research and his stratagem, Mischa was caught.  He was killed.  He got my brother killed.  He got our friends, Petyr, Ivan and Alexei killed.  I tried to warn the others.  Reopening this research will get you killed, but I was ignored.  More innocents will die.” His hands waved as he spoke, as if he were conjuring his words from the air.  Perhaps it was a distraction so that she wouldn’t see his pain.  He still mourned his brother.

“Was he really that careless?” She spoke barely above a whisper, afraid of tarnishing her father’s name.

“Careless? No.  Unprepared, is more like.  He made a move before he knew better.  Too quick to attack.” Utkin explained.

“It seems like all of this should just be buried away.  He wouldn’t want anyone else to die over this.” Valentina shook her head.

Dr. Utkin nodded. “He wouldn’t want that.  He was a good man, but he should be laid to rest.”

“Why didn’t my mother ever tell me about him?  Why didn’t his family ever come to see me? Why am I only just meeting them now?” Valentina asked.  Maybe it was the idea that her father was dead, or maybe it was her headache, but she could feel the tears burning in her eyes.

“Your mother was a sweet woman, but she was young.  The Sima family liked her well enough, but thought she dragged him to his fate.  They had only just got him back when he ran off to join the Prizrak Rytsarya to protect her from the phantoms he saw everywhere.  What he needed was psychological help, and what she did was push him into another stressful martial law position.  That’s how they met.  That was the only way they could work.  Of course, this is all according to the Sima clan, a collection of penniless, alcoholic, opportunistic farmers.” Dr. Utkin’s words were confusing.  She’d never heard this about her parents before, but of course, she’d never heard anything about her parents before.

“Is that why they were never part of my life?  They wrote off my mother and me too?” Valentina produced a handkerchief from her bag and dabbed at her eyes.  She sniffed back tears as she managed to speak.

“Your father was the best hope they had, and they were bitter they had lost him to a Western European woman – one that spoke German, no less, and with him went their money.  If he had not joined the Prizrak Rytsarya, he would have worked his father’s farm.  Or at the least, if he had joined, but not gotten married to your mother, he’d send his money home to them, not to her.  The Sima family, all they saw in your father was the potential to line their pockets.  That’s all they see in anyone.  How much money can this person make me?  That’s why I told that miserable whore, Viktoriya to stay away from you.  I wish I could have kept her from Elijah.  She will lure him to his death like a siren.” Utkin warned.

Valentina closed her eyes.  She saw Elijah in his hospital bed, straddling the line between life and death.  Her heart ached.  She wouldn’t allow that to happen again. “What can we do?  It all needs to stop.  No one else needs to die.”

“You just have to make him see that he’s on the wrong path.  Mischa should be left to rest.  The sooner he accepts that, the safer he will be.” Utkin nodded.

“Thank you for your time, Dr. Utkin.  I’ll be in contact with you again over the semester.”  Valentina rose to her feet.  She stopped to dry her eyes again before heading out the door.

Her mind was still heavy.  The more she learned about her extended family, the less she wanted to know.  Her mother had always been so loving, so gentle.  She was no mastermind with designs on luring a husband to death.  Murroh said that her parents loved each other dearly, that they lived for one another.  How could her father’s family be so ignorant?  How did they not see what everyone else saw?

Her poor mother.  Her poor father.  Dead five and ten years respectively, but not yet laid to rest.  Not properly, at least.  The best way to honor them would be to leave them in memory and stop turning over rock and bringing up the painful past.  She could see the pain of losing his brother was still weighing heavily on Dr. Utkin.  Murroh still carried the guilt and sorrow from Mischa’s death.  Valentina still missed her mother sharply.

It was wrong to let Eli talk her into this silly hunt.  What a ridiculous idea to think that her father was alive.  That all would take was a few books, a road trip and a few questions and that her father would just return to her?  If it was that simple, why hadn’t Murroh done it? Or her mother? Or Dr. Utkin?  No, Mischa was dead. Valentina was a fool for letting Eli convince her otherwise.  She was foolish for getting roped in to helping with his research.

So far, Eli was enjoying his work as consultant for both the CIA and the Spetsgruppa Drakon Pushki.  Each organization paid him well, and separately.  His hours were steady.  Every work day started ten in the morning, broke at one for an hour lunch, and then resumed working until five in the evening.  His work was consistent.  If the group wasn’t tearing apart some former office or residence of Mikhail Sima’s they were systematically digging through his journals and research.

They had developed an assembly line-like process for evaluating Mischa’s papers.  Gregori and Vikenti would translate the books and reports into English.  Eli would review the translations, making note of anything strange, or seemed like it might be connected to his disappearance.  Those notes would go to Viktoriya, where she would read what Eli had passed along, and try to piece the information into what they already had, trying to make a bigger picture.

Murroh didn’t help much.  Unless he was guiding them to a new location, he actually didn’t help at all.  He spent most of his time back at his own hotel – he stayed in a different location from the Russian, with his wife, or out with Valentina.  Eli didn’t seem to mind though.  Valentina was happy to have her father around, and honestly, Murroh wasn’t more of a hindrance when he was around.

The Russians were all very nice to Eli.  Gregori and Vikenti’s English skills weren’t great, but they were always polite.  They would have to use Viktoriya as a translator, but the fact that they didn’t ignore him because he was mute made Eli feel valued.  The conversations weren’t only limited to work.  Gregori liked to talk to Eli about soccer and beer, and Vikenti liked Eli’s suits. 

Eli often ate lunch with Viktoriya during their hour out of the office.  She was as strict about getting work done, as she was with putting the work aside.  During their meals, they often talked about learning to sign, learning Russian, or music.  Sometimes he would insist on only communicating with her if she signed to him, but still carried on conversations.  There were other times when Viktoriya would only speak in Russian to Eli, albeit in very simple sentences.  She was throwing Eli into a crash course, he was doing the same to her, and both were doing better than they would be with books alone.

Eli never worked on the weekend.  Viktoriya gave everyone Saturday and Sunday off to worship as they wanted, even though she did not attend any form of service herself.  Eli sometimes wondered what Viktoriya did during her free time.  Judging by her appearance, he assumed she worked out in her hotel’s gym, or maybe practiced her sign language.  Eli hoped she had another hobby to keep her busy.  She seemed too nice to be sitting, bored and alone in her hotel room.

Eli arrived home Friday evening with his mail tucked under his arm and his umbrella hanging over his wrist.  It had been raining that morning, but the sun had prevailed by lunch time.  Eli wasn’t sure what to attribute it to, but even he noticed the modern update to his wardrobe.  This time he wore a slim cut navy button-down shirt with a slightly darker navy tie.  His dark grey slacks were tailored to his build, and held up with a black belt.  Just as he dropped his umbrella in the stand, Ceres and Dinah were running to him, barking happily.  With two quick snaps, both dogs were quieted and seated, though they were still fidgeting.

“Don’t let your little girls play you, Eli.  My dad and I had them out an hour ago.” Valentina called from the kitchen.

“Is he still here?” Eli asked, looking around the apartment with his hounds at his heels.

“No, he left.   He was taking Ekaterina out to dinner tonight.  I guess every night is out to dinner when you don’t live here, but they were going someplace nice.” Valentina explained.  She slid to his side and planted a kiss on his cheek. “How was work?”

“Good.  We translated three books so far.” Eli returned the kiss, and then threw the mail down on the table.  He never told her any details about his work.  Eli had signed documents, holding his tongue regarding such matters. “How was your day?”

“Nice.  I went shopping for my fall wardrobe.  I took the dogs to the groomer.  Got my nails done…” Valentina scrunched her nose as she thought. “And then my dad came over and we talked for a while.”

“Was it something important, or just family togetherness?” Eli watched her go through the mail.  There was another letter from Utkin, but Eli just ignored it.  Instead, he took a seat on the couch, letting Ceres rest her head on his knee and Dinah lick his hand.

“We were talking about his work mostly.  What he could tell me.  The Russians keep a lot from him.  I’m sure there’s more to that story than what he tells me, but it’s none of my business. We talked about New York City, and London, and some other things.  Nothing you need to worry about.” Valentina told him as she returned to the kitchen.

“Are you already cooking?  I thought we could go to the pub tonight.” Eli looked over his shoulder at her.

“I have a meeting tomorrow morning, at eight.  I probably shouldn’t.  I was thinking about a small meal and then maybe a movie here at home.  We could have a nice night in.” She suggested.

Eli’s eyebrows rose over the frames of his glasses, but he didn’t say anything.  He calmed the dogs, giving the sisters attention until they were satisfied.  Dinah and Ceres shared a large dog bed by a heat vent.  He’d given each of them their own at first, but they preferred to sleep curled up on one another.  In a way, Eli was reminded of himself and Levi.  They could have their own lives, but they just felt happier when their sibling was close.  Watching his dogs took his mind off of Valentina’s behavior.  Something wasn’t right, but he wasn’t sure.  

With the recent changes in his life and his schedule, Eli and Valentina saw less of each other during the day.  Most of their time together was in the evenings at on the weekends.    They had dinner together every evening, Eli and Valentina went out to see movies and concerts, or go to a bar, and they spent most nights together, in the more meaningful sense.  Valentina said she was fine with the arrangement, but up until just a week ago, she was still asking him about meeting with Utkin. 

Valentina slipped in beside him on the couch, breaking him from his thoughts. “We’ll go to the pub tomorrow night.  I’ll call Levi and Lin and invite them too.”

“Maybe we should invite Viktoriya, Gregori and Vikenti too.” Eli offered, taking her hand.

“Oh.” The smile faltered on Valentina’s face.  “Yes, we could do that.  If you think they’d accept our invitation.  Captain Sima doesn’t seem to like me, Eli.”

“No, she likes you Valentina.  You are her cousin!  It’s just difficult because of work.  I’m sure if it was just a social call, you two would be friends.”  Eli reassured her.

Valentina stood up, wandering away from the couch again. She didn’t say anything at first, and Eli couldn’t tell if she was mad or if he had offended her with the suggestion.  He turned to watch her, but it seemed that Valentina was just making dinner.