#loki mcu reader insert

We find ourselves in another story, in another world. One I have yet to explore before. But just like any other story, there are several tweaks and adjustments. Some changes are small and barely noticeable. Others are life-altering. This moment is one of the latter.

In all other timelines, you agreed to Jessie Slate's deal. You accepted his protection and became his Siren. A decision you would regret several times over the years that followed. However, it was a choice none could fault you for. You were only fifteen and trapped between two terrible choices. That was exactly what Jessie Slate was relying on, your youth and your fear of the unknown.

However, this time, in this one timeline, you did not succumb to that fear.

"I'm leaving," you said with all the strength you could muster. You raised your gaze to his defiantly. "You said if I wanted to leave, you would let me. Is that true?"

Jessie stared at you, blinking in shock. "I said that, but kid, the world is a dangerous place. Are you sure you want to do it alone? I'm offering you a lot here. Protection. Security. Family."

You snorted a laugh. "I don't have good experiences with that. So, I'll take my chances." You turned and began to make your way to the door. However, you knew it wouldn't be as easy as that.

"Grab her," Jessie said and you felt a pair of hands on your arms.

"Get off me," you commanded and those hands immediately fell away. You turned on your heels and turned to Jessie Slate. "I'm going to leave, and you're going to do nothing to stop me."

You could see the curiosity and fascination in his eyes as your command took hold. If Jessie wanted to have you before experiencing your powers firsthand, he needed you now.

"Go ahead, and run, little siren," he said with a sickening smirk. "But I'll find you when you least expect it."

You took him at his word and quickly scurried away, determined to run faster than he could find you.

You knew you couldn't go back to your father. Jessie would find you there, and also you couldn't look your father in the eye after what he did to you. Trading your life away for some cash was just too much to stomach. Your father took advantage of your powers frequently, but until then you never knew just how much he saw you as an object. A means to an end.

You briefly considered tracking down your mother, but you quickly determined some doors were better left closed.

That only left you with one option. To go it alone. With only the clothes on your back and your mutation, you would start fresh.

~*~*~*~*~

Years later…

"Loki, we need to talk," Thor said solemnly as he guided his younger brother into one of the conference rooms in the Avengers Tower.

Loki glanced around the table skeptically. He recognized Tony Stark, Nick Fury, and a few of the people sitting around the table, but there were several mortals in suits and dresses that he didn't recognize.

"What's going on here?" Loki asked as he took a seat at the table beside Thor. "Whatever you think I did, I didn't. It was just a joke. A prank gone wrong."

The business people around the room looked equally unimpressed, but what else was new? After three whole years of fighting on the side of good, everyone (except his brother) seemed determined to ice him out.

Not that he had any interest in befriending mortals.

"These are some PR people," Tony announced before gesturing around the room. "I've hired them to help improve your image."

"My image?" Loki repeated skeptically. "What in Hel's name are you talking about?"

"You've been here for three years, and people still don't trust you," Tony said bluntly.

Loki crossed his arms as he sat back in his chair. "They don't need to trust me. I just need to assist in keeping them safe until my exile is over."

"Yes, but it would be easier to do that if the Midgardians viewed you in a more positive light," Thor added. "Remember that woman last week who wouldn't let you save her from a burning car."

Loki frowned at the memory. That woman was ridiculous. Upon seeing Loki's face she screamed louder than a banshee and tried to claw at him as he tried to free her from her seat belt. He had to use seidr to calm her down enough so he could save her life. "She was a fool who thought death by burning was better than being saved by me."

"And she's not alone," one of the PR people Tony hired spoke up. He turned to the projected image of charts on the wall. "One of our polls found that over eighty percent of New Yorkers find you untrustworthy, and sixty percent would describe you as evil."

Loki shrugged. "Only sixty? I consider that a marked improvement from last year."

Tony huffed a sigh. "Avengers and evil shouldn't be said in the same sentence unless it's to talk about how we kick evil's ass."

"Well, I don't know what you want me to do about it," Loki said flippantly. This conversation was beginning to get on his nerves. It wasn't like he wasn't trying. He did everything he could to earn the trust of the mortals, but they remained suspicious of him. No matter what he did.

"You're going on a press tour, baby," Tony said as he got to his feet. "They suck but they are effective when it comes to needing to change your image. Trust me, I speak from experience."

"A press tour? What, am I to go shake hands and kiss babies?"

"Christ no, if you went near a baby at this point their parents would likely call the police," one of the PR managers said. "We've laid out a six-month plan with steady interviews and press engagements."

"I don't have a choice in this, do I?" Loki asked.

Tony shook his head. "Not unless you want to find a new place to live."

Loki slumped back in his chair, looking defeated. He wasn't sure if Thor's encouraging shoulder pats were helpful or infuriating at that moment.

"It won't be so bad, brother," Thor said with a warm smile. "Soon all of Midgard will see you for the man I know you are."

"I've tried to kill you multiple times," Loki reminded him.

Thor seemed nonplussed at Loki's statement. "Only because you knew I could take it."

Loki heaved a heavy sigh before waving his hand in a dismissive gesture. "Fine, I'll do the silly little interviews. Make the arrangements."

~*~*~*~*~

Tony hadn't been kidding when he said press tours were terrible. The interviews and engagements seemed to never end. If he had to smile and talk about what it was like growing up with Thor one more time, Loki was certain he would stab something or someone.

The worst was visiting a classroom full of tiny mortals. He was forced to read them a story about a feline trickster god with a penchant for striped hats. Although he had to admit, he admired the chaotic cat's style.

As if reading the story wasn't painful enough, he was then forced to answer their questions. At least the tiny mortals asked new questions he found surprisingly refreshing. Like what his favorite dinosaur was. After some thought Loki decided on the brachiosaurus, to which the child who posed the question nodded sagely.

Loki checked his watch as he continued down the street, ducking into an alley to take a shortcut. Stark was going to kill him if he was late for his…what was it today? A puppy interview? The inane things these mortals came up with always surprised him.

He was so lost in thought he did not hear the footsteps behind him. Nor did he hear the click of the gun.

"Give me your wallet, and the watch too."

Loki closed his eyes and groaned. Perfect. Just perfect. Well, now he was definitely going to be late. He told Thor he should not be forced to wear power dampeners when he wasn't on a mission. He turned on his heels to face his assailant and tried to put on his most charming smile. It would be best if he didn't get any blood on his suit, otherwise, Martin, his media consultant, would have a fit.

"Trust me when I say you don't want to do that," Loki said in an even tone.

However, his would-be robber would not be deterred. "Maybe you didn't hear me. Give me your wallet and your watch. Now."

Before Loki could lament his chances of not getting his suit stained with the blood of an idiot, another voice came from behind him. One that was much more enticing.

"Drop the gun."

Something about the words sent a shiver through his body. No, shiver wasn't the right word. It was more of a tingle, like a minor shock was passing through him. It wasn't too dissimilar from being hit with one of Thors's thunderbolts when they were children.

Even more curious, the man before him obeyed without hesitation. He fumbled with the gun before letting it fall to the ground. "What the fu-"

"Now get out of here, and find a real job."

His assailant turned and ran away from them, leaving Loki alone with the fascinating individual who just saved him from a real headache.

"I suppose I should express my gratitude," Loki began as he turned once more to better face you.

But you were already walking away from him. The hood from your sweatshirt was pulled up and Loki could barely make out some faded logo on the back of it.

Loki almost felt insulted. "Hello? You saved my life and you're just walking away?"

"Not interested," you said before stopping and looking over your shoulder. Your hood obscured your face from his vision. "But next time don't cut down a sketchy alley while wearing designer shoes."

Loki scoffed and looked down at his shoes. "I would hardly call them designer," he grumbled before looking up and seeing that you were already gone.

Well, at least today was going to be interesting.

~*~*~*~*~

You cursed under your breath as you slid in the back door and quickly unzipped your hoodie.

"Late again," Kelly, your coworker, said with a smirk.

You barely stopped yourself from rolling your eyes. "I got held up." It wasn't entirely truthful, as you were not the one being held at gunpoint, but you weren't going to get into it with Kelly. "Is Abe in?"

Kelly shook her head. "Nah, you're safe. He's out on a supply run. But you better get out there, we're already swamped."

"I'm going, I'm going." You quickly tied your apron around your waist and affixed your nametag to your shirt. You fished your notepad out of your apron pocket and slipped into the dining room.

Waiting tables wasn't glamorous, but it was steady. The tips weren't half bad, and you didn't mind the work. It paid enough to keep a roof over your head, and that was all you needed anyway.

Your shift passed by in a flurry of greasy food and cold beers. It was busy, but at least the time was going by quicker than on a slow day.

You didn't even look up from your notepad as you approached the next table. "Can I get you something to drink?"

"Ah, so here's my savior."

You froze as you looked up from your notepad to the man sitting in front of you. The same man from earlier. He was wearing the same all-black suit, although it seemed to be coated in dog hair now.

"Bold choice in a pickup line, pal," you said, forcing yourself to remain calm.

"Ah, so you're a terrible liar as well," he all but purred as he leaned forward on his table to get a better look at you. "How charming."

You could feel your heart starting to beat faster in your chest. What was he doing here? How did he find you? You were careful and made sure no one followed you to work. However, the man continued to appraise you, but not in the way your male customers normally did. He wasn't simply evaluating your appearance, it was like he was trying to look into you.

"What are you?" he asked finally, once he concluded his investigation.

"I'm a waitress," you answered without hesitation. "Now can I get you a drink?"

The man only chuckled. "We both know you're more than that."

"A root beer it is then." You quickly jotted that down on your notepad. "Coming right up, sir."

Before he could say another word, you quickly made your escape back behind the counter. You could feel the panic building up in your chest. This is what you got for trying to do something good with your powers. Talk about no good deed going unpunished. That was the last time you took your teenage neighbor's advice. What did Peter know about having powers anyway?

"Hey Kelly, I need you to swap tables with me," you said to your coworker as you gestured to the man's table. "He's hot and has money."

Kelly glanced at the man and shook her head. "Hon, I already tried to swipe him, but he seemed determined to be seated in your section." Kelly grinned. "Who is he? An ex-boyfriend? A one-night stand?"

You could only sigh as you picked up a clean glass. "Sure, something like that." You knew if you fought against her, Kelly would just keep digging for gossip that you were not prepared to give. You tried to keep a clear boundary with your coworkers. Kelly had only recently been granted the privilege of having your cell phone number. You weren't about to make her privy to your genetic makeup. Not yet anyway.

You held the root beer in your hand as you tried to figure out what you would do next. Of course, there was one option but you hated to use it. You tried not to use your powers on people but desperate times called for desperate measures. You cleared your throat and approached his table once more.

"Here we go," you said in a congenial tone. "Now, why don't you drink that quickly, leave me a big tip, and never come back here again."

The more complicated you made a command, the more energy it took to exert your will on others. You could feel a slight strain in your throat, but it would be worth it when this man dropped a nice stack of cash and left you the hell alone.

Instead, he leisurely reached for his drink and slowly brought it to his lips.

"No, I don't think I will," he said with a smirk before taking a long, slow sip of his drink.

You instinctively recoiled. No one had ever been able to resist your powers. Not since you were a small child. No one.

"What are you?" you asked, looking at the man a little closer now.

"My my my. It seems we both have questions." He set the drink down on the table and looked up at you, that same smirk still on his face. "I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

You couldn't help but wrinkle your nose in disgust. "Could you have made that sound any more crude?"

"Fair enough," Loki chuckled. "But I am dying to know more about the person who would risk their pretty neck to save someone from being mugged, only to leave before they can be properly thanked."

"Consider it a temporary lapse in judgment, it won't happen again," you huffed before crossing your arms. There was something about this man that unnerved you, besides the fact that your powers did not affect him. You were certain he looked familiar, but you just couldn't figure out where you saw him before.

Then it hit you.

"You're Loki, one of those Avengers," you said with a gasp. Of fucking course you ran into a goddamn Avenger. The absolute last thing you needed.

Loki, to his credit, looked a little chagrin. "Most people recognize me as the villain who almost destroyed New York three years ago."

You shrugged. "I wasn't in the city at the time, so I missed that bit." You weren't there when the skies opened up and aliens flooded the city, but you heard stories even years later.

"It wasn't much, just a failed attempt at world domination," he replied breezily and despite yourself, you laughed. He was just so damn charming.

"Doesn't sound like much," you agreed before glancing around. "Listen, I can't talk about…what happened earlier…while I'm at work." You asked, hoping against hope that Loki of all people would understand your desire to be left alone.

Loki considered your unspoken request. "When do you get off work?"

"I'm not interested in dating," you replied.

Loki waved aside your concern. "Neither am I, so no worries there. I simply want the chance to learn more about your silver tongue, darling."

Despite his words, you could swear he was flirting with you. You raised an eyebrow. "I get off at 8," you finally answered.

Loki reached into his pocket and pulled out a wallet. He put down a hundred dollar bill, far overpaying for the root beer you gave him. "Then I will see you here at 8 o'clock." He got to his feet and brushed off the front of his jacket, cringing as he noticed just how covered he was in dog fur.

He left, leaving you with a massive cash tip, and a small grin. You quickly pocketed the cash and continued your shift, curious to see where the day would take you.

~*~*~*~*~

Loki returned to the Avengers Tower, mostly to change into something less covered in dog fur. He wanted to look his best when he saw you again. At first he had only been interested in learning more about you and that fascinating ability of yours, but after speaking with you for those short few minutes he found himself feeling eager to spend more time with you. You did not seem to fear him, and you were witty and charming. Not to mention you were a massive mystery to him. He was looking forward to seeing you again.

On his way to his room he ran into his brother.

"So, how were the tiny dogs?" Thor asked with a wide grin.

Loki shrugged. "Very…wiggly."

Thor laughed loudly and slapped Loki on the shoulder. "That they are! I rather enjoyed my interview with them. There was this one, they named him Thunder, and he would not stop licking my face."

"Fascinating," Loki replied dryly before continuing down the hall to his room. He suppressed the urge to roll his eyes when he heard Thor following behind him, but he pressed on, unbuttoning his suit jacket.

"Something is different about you, brother," Thor remarked as he closed the door to Loki's room. "I can't put my finger on it."

"I haven't the faintest idea what you are saying."

"You seem…brighter, in a way. Did something happen during the interview?"

Loki remained silent as he searched through his closet for a better outfit for his meeting with you that evening. Perhaps if he ignored Thor, the large pest would go away.

"No, it was after your interview…" Thor said as he watched Loki curiously. "I got it! You met someone!"

Loki stiffened just slightly, a moment of weakness but enough to give him away.

"I'm right!" Thor said joyously, clapping his had together. "Tell me everything about them."

Loki considered this for a few long moments. As much as Thor got on his nerves, he knew his brother had good intentions. However, Loki had no idea if anything would come from your little rendezvous. You told him you had no interest in dating, and he hadn't lied when he said the same. But something in his gut told him there was a future with you. You just felt…right.

Of course, Loki's instincts were not unfounded. You and Loki were right for one another. Later that evening you would meet and drink tea, as you did in your normal timeline. And you would manage to build your same relationship, just on a slightly different path. One day, you would find your way back to the Avengers, and you would even befriend Thor, much to Loki's chagrin.

But that was in the future.

"I don't think I will," Loki said with a small smile. "I think I'll keep her my little secret for now."

His true form would not fit through the door of your bookstore. So he would have to walk in as his normal self. Then what? He would just make awkward eye contact with you as he transformed? Also, he hadn't been entirely truthful with you about who he was and what he was. What if you were scared of him when you found out? What if you were one of those people who hated him after that whole Chiturian army incident?

By the great roots of Yggdrasil, what if you had been joking?

What if you had been joking about being attracted to the grotesque monsters in that silly novel you had gotten him addicted to? Sure you weren't serious. You were having a go at him. Why else would you have randomly asked him about his opinions on the sex scenes? Surely to tease him and have a laugh.

So no, he would not be returning to your store in his full blue-skinned glory. Not tomorrow and not ever.

And with a sigh, he sat down to crack open the blasted thirteenth book in this awful, atrocious series.

~*~*~*~*~

If it had been anyone else, you would have called the cops.

But when you walked up to your store the next morning and saw Loki patiently waiting there for you, you couldn't say you were surprised. What surprised you was that he was holding up the last book he purchased just yesterday. He didn't normally bring them back.

"Bek?" Loki asked with a huff. "Are you telling me that even that low-life scoundrel gets a mate? After what he did?"

You chuckled as you reached for your keys. "I know, I thought the same thing when I first read it." You fiddled with the key the precise amount your aging lock required before hip-checking the door into opening. "But I promise it's worth it."

"No," Loki said, shaking his head and following you inside as you opened the shop. He even helped you turn on light switches. "I will not stand for it. I refuse to read of that monster getting a happily ever after. This is where I leave the series."

Once you rounded the counter and started to count the register, he stood across from you. He dropped the book down on the counter with a decisive thud.

You looked down at the book, then back up at him. Then you pointed to the sign behind you that said "We don't give refunds because of moral objections".

"Of course, I'm not looking for a refund," Loki said before crossing his arms. "It was for dramatic effect."

You rolled your eyes as you went back to counting the ones in the cash register. "I also needed to take a break when I caught to that part, but I came back just as you will."

"I will not!" Loki insisted, disgusted by the very idea.

You just gave him an unimpressed look. "Until then, how about I show you another series?"

Loki let out a sigh, his shoulders instantly relaxing. "Alright, fine," he grumbled. As much as he tried to deny it, he was shaping up to be an even bigger romance junkie than you. "What do you have in mind?"

You thought about it for a few moments, considering your options. You considered introducing him to another genre. You could picture him getting equally obsessed with a good cozy mystery. But then you got a more devilish idea.

"I think I know just the series," you said before heading down one of the aisles.

You didn't check to see if Loki was following you. You knew he was. He always did. You let your finger brush the spines of the books until you found the one you wanted. The cover was designed to look like the old oil painting covers on the romance novels you stole from your mother's hidden stash.

"The Dragon's Bride," you said as you handed the book to him. "This one has more of a fantasy vibe obviously, and I love the author. And I promise this series is much shorter. Only five so far, and the sixth one is supposed to come out soon."

Loki rolled his eyes as he observed the cover. "I see, so she's the damsel in distress and some valiant knight will save her from the beast chaining her up?"

You snorted. "Not at all, my good friend." You pointed to the green draconic figure he called a beast. "That's the love interest, he basically saves her from an abusive marriage."

"….He…he literally has her in shackles."

"And she's into it!"

Loki was silent for a few moments, simply taking in the cover art and your determined expression. "What is wrong with you?" he simply asked.

"What's wrong with me?" you repeated, putting your hands on your hips. "This is the published stuff I read. Compared to the stuff I read on Paetron, this is downright tame-"

Loki interrupted you, partially because he did not want to hear the end of that sentence, and partially because he was fed up with this whole game of yours. "What about this nonsense could appeal to you?"

You glanced down at the book in his hand. "Hot, rich, dragon-king who gives her a library and he has two dicks. What's not to love?"

"Two-? No." Loki shook his head, refusing to let himself be distracted. He took a deep breath and tried to get his thoughts in order. "This stuff is obviously written as a joke. No one is daydreaming about being abducted by a dragon man."

"You and I clearly run in different circles-"

"Enough!" Loki barked, raising his voice for the first time since you've known him.

It surprised you and made you shut your mouth.

"There is nothing attractive about monsters. They are awful and despicable creatures that should be at best pitied, and at worst eliminated." His chest heaved with emotion as he finished his outburst.

Your expression softened as you realized there was something deeper to this, something more than some lighthearted teasing. This was bothering him.

"Doesn't it make sense though? To want to love and be loved regardless of appearances?"

Loki scoffed. "There are limits."

You shrugged, undeterred. "Sure their features are odd, but so are mine. That dragon man isn't going to care that I have stretch marks or body hair. Not in the way another human might. That's the ultimate fantasy."

Loki studied you closely, looking for any hint of deception or mockery. He found none. You were speaking from your own experience. In your short mortal life, you had been made to feel so…he didn't have the right word for it as he had not lived your life. But he could see a glimmer of past insecurities. It reminded him a little too much of what he saw when he looked at himself in the mirror.

"I can't speak for everyone who likes these books," you continued speaking. "But yeah. Why wouldn't monsters appeal to those who feel a little monstrous?"

Loki cleared his throat before replying. "You are not monstrous. Far from it, in fact."

"Neither are you," you said before taking his free hand and gently squeezing it.

Loki let his gaze fall to your joined hands. "There is something have to tell you. About me, I-"

"I know."

"You know?"

"Loki isn't a very common name these days," you said with a playful smile. "And to be using a credit card with Tony Stark's name on it? Yeah, I know."

"Oh."

And suddenly all his fears felt foolish. You knew, and you had known since practically the beginning. Yet you still welcomed him into your store and into your life. How could you believe yourself to be monstrous when you were so angelic in his eyes?

Loki swallowed hard as he fought against the sudden flood of emotion that made his chest feel tight. "Alright, I'll buy the damn book."

You grinned and led him back to the front of the store, not letting go of his hand. "I can't wait to hear your thoughts."

Loki chuckled as he followed you to the main counter. You released his hand to start ringing up the book, and he reached for his wallet. "I'll be sure to share them the next time I come in."

"Or, we could talk about it over dinner," you suggested, not looking up from the cash register. "At my place?"

His throat suddenly felt dry as he held out his credit card for you to take. "Sounds perfect."

"Great, I'll text you," you giggled and quickly put the book into a bag and handed it to him.

He took the bag and waved to you before heading towards the door.

"Oh, Loki?"

He turned in the doorway and looked at you. "Yes?"

"Try to actually pay attention to the sex scenes this time. This book is a particular favorite of mine."

You had the audacity to wink at him. For a bookworm, your boldness never ceased to surprise him. Loki was beginning to wonder if he was in over his head.

"Duly noted," he said with a grin of his own before turning to leave.

Even if he was in over his head, Loki was a quick study.

The teasing would only get worse when Loki got overzealous and left behind a damning bruise on your neck. You were a grown adult, but with Loki you acted like a hormone ridden child. Your friends speculated on where else Loki had marked you, if he laid his claim to your skin under your clothes.  

Loki was a god after all, and surely gods demanded complete devotion? 

~*~*~*~*~ 

“Darling, please...” the words escaped his lips like a broken prayer.   

He painted a perfectly sinful image, spread out on your bed like a feast. His dark curls were wild and fanned out across your pillows. His neck, bared and tense as he threw his head back once more when you nipped the skin on his thigh, adding to the growing collection of love bites there. A slight flush crept down his chest, which heaved with every panting breath. He was simply divine.  

You grinned against his pale skin, trying not to chuckle as he moaned like a whore when he felt your teeth tease him.  

“Not yet, my love. Soon,” you murmured, feeling the muscles of his thigh twitch under your hand.  

Loki groaned in equal parts frustration and arousal. “You’ve been saying that for hours,” he whined, and this time you could not help the chuckle that escaped your lips.  

“It hasn’t even been ten minutes,” you soothed before giving him a playful nip.  

Loki forced his eyes open to look down at you, and you were pleased to see the slightly hazy look in his eye. Desperate and wanting.  

“That’s impossible, it’s been at least an hour,” he argued petulantly.  

You nuzzled your face against his inner thigh to smother your fond smile. “It’s been ten minutes,” you repeated.  

“Well, regardless darling, you are trying my patience,” he huffed a sigh, and you did not have to look up at him to know he was pouting.  

“I thought you liked it when I marked you up,” you asked as you glanced up at him, immediately confirming your earlier suspicions. You pulled away from him, relishing how he squirmed and rolled his hips towards you. Subtly chasing your touch.  

“I never claimed otherwise.” Loki managed to sound remotely calm, even as his heart raced in his chest. 

You smirked as an idea popped into your head. You twisted your body in order to reach the pen that was on your bedside table. With a delighted giggled you retrieved it and settled back into your place between your lover’s spread thighs.  

He looked down at you with a mixture of amusement and burning desire. You gently pushed on his knee, guiding him to spread his legs wider so that you could get a better angle. Loki allowed it, as he watched you curiously.  

Satisfied, you uncapped the pen and began to write on an unblemished spot on in his inner thigh. The black ink contrasted beautifully against his red and bruised skin.

Mine.  

You even added a small heart at the end, and Loki could not stop staring. You claimed him, and you had done it so casually, so brazenly. The ink burned his skin in the most delicious way, and part of him wished it would never fade away.  

You grinned up at him as you capped the pen, completely unrepentant. “You got a problem with that?”  

Loki almost forgot to breathe as he kept staring at the simple four-letter word.  

Mine. 

Yours. He was yours. Always had been, and always would be.  

“Just one problem, my darling,” Loki all but purred. His legs were still proudly spread, and your handwriting in black ink against his pale skin was on display. “That your own, lovely thigh is unadorned.” 

You giggled. “Oh? I suppose you should fix that.”   

With a lustful growl, Loki all but pounced on you. He plucked the pen from your fingers as his lips trailed down your neck and continued down your body. You arched your back as you felt his hand grip your thigh and spread it wide.  

You closed your eyes and sighed blissfully as he uncapped the pen. Then he began to write down his own claim to you, your body, and your very soul. 

And in the back of your mind, you tried to remember if any nearby tattoo shops were open at this hour.  

As the panic began to surge through you, you managed to pick up your phone and quickly send off a text. Natasha was the only person you trusted to help you in such a mortifying situation.

You: Can you come to my room really quick? Need help, no questions asked.

You stared at the phone desperately, waiting and watching for the three dots at the bottom of the screen.

Nat: Sorry, I’m not there. Everyone got pulled away on a mission. Are you okay?

You did your best not to scream in frustration. That was just your luck. You were counting on Nat to help you out. Granted, she would laugh her ass off once you told her what happened, but then she would take that secret to her grave. Instead, you wrote one more text before tossing your phone aside.

You: No worries! I’ll figure it out :)

You banged your head against the wall, as you considered your fate. Maybe if you were really careful, you could cut it off. But it was your favorite belt, and you really did not want to have to do that. Your phone pinged and you looked at the screen, reading the latest message.

Nat: Okay! If you need anything Loki is still in the building.

Fuck.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Loki was enjoying a pleasant evening, reading a book from the comfort of his apartment, when a sudden knock rattled his door. He huffed a sigh before forcing himself to his feet. Another impatient knock came, testing the last of Loki’s patience, not that he had much to begin with.

He was still angry about the mission you and he just returned from. The entire time you were so damn reckless. Every time he tried to step in and convince you to see reason, you would double down and put yourself in more danger. You mouthed off to him constantly, as if you were determined to get on the god’s bad side. If he did not know any better, he would recommend you receive a psychological evaluation.

“What do you-” Loki growled as he opened the door, but cut himself off once he saw you, standing before him in your pajamas, with an embarrassed expression, and your wrists bound together tightly in a black leather belt.

All wrapped up like a present.

“I don’t want to get into it,” you said before lifting your wrists. “I need you to help me get these off.”

“No,” Loki said with a small grin as he leaned in his doorway. “I don’t think I will.”

“No?” you asked incredulously. “What do you mean no?”

He reached out and hooked his finger under the restraint. He brought your wrists up closer for his inspection. “Dare I say, I think you have a knack for this, darling," he teased as he looked over the knot. "But improvements can still be made.” He took the remaining tab of the belt and tucked it into the metal loop once more, undoing the tiny amount of progress your wriggling had accomplished.

You jerked your bound wrists away from him, only to find that his adjustment made the restraint even tighter. You wrestled with it once more to no avail. “Asshole,” you spat out.

To your frustration, he only chuckled. “I do not think you’re in any position to be name-calling, pet. Not in your predicament.” He turned and walked back into his room.

You felt heat bloom across your cheeks, but you forced yourself to follow him into the room. The door shut behind you. “Are you seriously not going to help me?”

Loki turned to look at you before crossing his arms. “I might, if you make it worth my while.” His voice dropped into a low rumble that almost sounded…flirtatious?

You stopped dead in your tracks. There was no way. Loki had told you countless times that you were the bane of his existence. The most recent time being just a few hours ago. He said it after your debrief, before you parted ways for the evening. There was no way he was flirting with you. You had just read too much romance.

“Loki, come on,” you begged, a slight whine making its way into your voice. “Just help me out, okay? This is my favorite belt, and I don’t want to have to cut it off.”

Loki raised an eyebrow at you. “And just how do you propose you would do that? You can barely move your fingers let alone hold a blade.”

As much as you hated it, you knew he was right. All your ideas involved creative angles and less than standard knife-handling techniques. You remained silent, figuring it was better than proving him right.

 “It’s like I can’t take my eyes off you for a second.” Loki shook his head and rolled his eyes.

“Loki, it’s been a long day, if you could just-“

“Darling, you are lucky I have not thrown you over my knee after the way you behaved today.”

Your mouth shut so fast you were worried you damaged your jaw. “What did you just say?”

“You heard me,” Loki said with a smug grin on his face as he uncrossed his arms. “You are in no position to be giving me orders.”

As if to add insult to injury, he hooked his finger under your bindings and pulled you closer to him. Slowly, he lifted your arms above your head, a silent reminder of your helpless and bound state.

“This isn’t funny, Loki,” you hissed, trying to sound annoyed even though deep down you were anything but. You were supposed to be indignant. Outraged even. You were not supposed to be turned on.

“I agree, pet,” he murmured. “There is nothing funny about you having such disregard for your own safety and well-being. Do you have a death wish?”

You wanted to groan, and not in the sexy way. “You’re being dramatic. I don’t have a death wish.”

“Oh?” Loki raised a quizzical eyebrow. “So, you are just stupidly stubborn, then?”

You were getting sick of his attitude. All you wanted was a nice, relaxing night alone and instead you were being forced to seek help from the worst possible source. This is what reading smut gets you.

You jerked your bound wrists out of his grasp. “Fuck your lecture, and get me out of these,” you insisted once more.

Loki made a disappointed tutting sound. “I only help good girls,” he said before grabbing your wrists again and pinning them against his chest. “And good girls don’t make demands like that.”

You let out a growl before you suddenly shifted your weight with the intention of kneeing him where it hurts. However, Loki was just one step ahead of you and he quickly maneuvered your body so your back was pinned against his chest, your bound wrists were still being held by the very hand that kept you trapped in that position.

“You didn’t think that move through, now did you?” Loki asked, his breath tickling your ear. “Kneeing a god in the groin? What did you hope to achieve?”

This time you did let out a groan of frustration as you struggled in his hold. “I was hoping that you would let me go. Since you’re not going to help me out, there is no reason for me to stay here.”

Loki, the bastard, only chuckled in your ear. “Who said I wouldn’t help you?”

“You did, multiple time.”

“No, I am more than happy to help pet. I’m just waiting.”

“Waiting? Waiting for what?”

“The one thing you haven’t done the entire time you’ve been in my room.”

You racked your brain trying to figure out what on earth he could be talking about. When suddenly it hit you. “Loki, will you please help me?”

His response was immediate. “With pleasure.”

With a quick flip of his wrist, your belt loosened around your wrists, and you were free. The belt fell to the floor in front of you and you breathed in a sigh of relief. Loki released his hold on you and leaned down to retrieve your belt from the floor.

You rubbed your wrist as you turned to face Loki. “Thank you.”

“Of course, what are friends for?” Loki winked before handing you the belt.

Your heart raced in your chest as you took the thin strap of leather from him and held it protectively against your chest. His eyes bored into yours, but he said nothing else.

“Well, then, good night,” you said.

Loki only gave you an amused smile. “Good night.”

You turned and made your way to the door. Just before you could get out and close the door behind you, you heard his voice call to you.

“Oh, and darling? The next time you are curious about bondage, why not just ask an expert?”

When he got his body back, he would kill Thor. He meant it this time. Nothing would save that oaf from his wrath. The Avengers be damned. Nothing would stop Loki from getting his revenge.

“Hey look! It’s a black cat,” a voice called.

“Let’s get it!” Another yelled back.

Normally such threats from a group of children would not even register on Loki’s radar. But as much as he loathed to admit it, Loki was vulnerable in this form. No magic, no strength. He was….

Ugh.

Helpless.

Loki did not need to hear anymore before taking off down the alley. A bunch of footsteps took off after him. His heart began to race in his chest as he ran as fast as his small legs would carry him. He barely paid any attention to where he was going before he ran into something.

“Hey there, honey,” a sweet voice cooed at him. “Are you lost?”

Loki hissed defensively.

You looked down at him and then up at the adolescent boys who were fast approaching.

“Are you in trouble, sweetie?” you asked before scooping him into your arms.

Loki wanted to hiss at you again but found he couldn’t. At this moment, being in your arms was the only thing protecting him from whatever those horrid children had planned.

The group of adolescents took one look at you and then down at Loki.

“Can I help you?” You asked the group, your tone of voice making it clear that you would not be accepting any sort of shenanigans.

The kids all looked sheepish before running off without another word. They knew the gig was up now that an adult was involved. Whatever sick fun they had planned for the unfortunate beast was not worth the hassle.

Instead of setting Loki down like he expected you to, you gently began to scratch behind his ear -by the fates how did that feel so good?

“What are you doing out here by yourself handsome?” you cooed to him softly. “You must be freezing, let’s get you outside.”

As humiliating as it was, Loki was grateful when you tucked him into your jacket, granting him respite from the rain. He curled close to your body, eagerly soaking in your body heat and vowing to himself he would take this secret to his grave.

~*~*~*~*~

Your home was small, incredibly so. Even in his smaller form, he was surprised by how small the space was. When you set him down, he took to exploring, expecting there to be more room hidden behind some door. His search came up empty.

By the time Loki made his way back to the main living space, you were poking around in the kitchen. “I don’t have any cat food, but I have some tuna?” you said out loud, showing him the can.

Loki meowed petulantly. Is this what I have been reduced to? Eating tuna from a can in some mortal’s overpriced studio apartment?

You had the audacity to chuckle at his outrage. “I should have known you were some bougie house cat.” You shook your head before turning to face him. “Well, it’s tuna or a bag of frozen broccoli, and to be honest I was kinda hoping to eat that tonight,” you said crossing your arms.

Loki stared at you for a moment, he could feel his tail swishing behind him. Surely you were planning on eating more than just a bag of frozen broccoli.

After a moment he huffed a sigh and meowed again, bowing his head gracefully.

“Tuna it is,” you said with a triumphant grin before rifling through your drawers to find the can opener.

Loki watch as you prepared your meals. You placed the frozen vegetables in the microwave and opened his can before plating both dishes (if he could even call them that).

“Here,” you said before setting his plate of tuna on the table across from your bowl of broccoli. “I wouldn’t want to insult you by making you eat straight from the can.

Loki glared at you before leaning down to eat. You chuckled again and picked up your fork.

Together the two of you ate in silence. Loki had only known you for about an hour, and he knew a few things about you. Your apartment was tiny, your pantry was frighteningly empty. Clearly your financial situation was rather dire. However, you had the heart to save a stray cat from the cold and a group of cruel children.

He vowed that he would do something to repay your kindness once he was able to figure how to get back to his normal form. After I murder Thor, of course.

After a few moments you broke the comfortable silence. “What should I call you, little guy?” you asked, tilting your head as you assessed him.

Loki meowed. You should call me by my name. Loki, Prince of Asgard, Rightful King of-

“How about Lucky?” you giggled a little, as if you made the funniest joke ever. “Get it?”

This is truly the worst day of my life.

At first, he feared how he would survive in such a different environment. Luckily for him, the ruler of the planet took a liking to him. Loki was good at schmoozing and meaningless chatter, and those talents had served him well so far.  

Sure, the Grandmaster was…eccentric, to say the least, but he knew how to throw a good party.  

Loki plucked a drink from a tray as he joined the party. The faces were already beginning to be familiar to him as he made his way through the crowd. Everyone who passed welcomed him to the party.  

“Oh Loki, there you are,” said a woman with pink skin. Loki wracked his brain for her name but came up empty. Melissa? No. That wasn’t right.  

Loki put on his most charming smile. “How can I be of service, darling?” He said with a hint of flirtation in his voice.  

Not-Melissa blushed, her skin turning from a light pink to dark red at the pet name. “Have you ever been to Beecaria? I was just thinking I could really use some sun.”  

“No, I cannot say I have, but if I remember correctly, didn’t they just suffer a hurricane.” Loki replied pleasantly.  

“Such a shame,” Not-Melissa sighed. “I guess I’ll have to go to Aladna then.” 

Before he could try to continue the conversation, someone else seemed to catch her attention.  

“If you’ll excuse me,” she said politely before taking her leave.  

Loki only shrugged and sipped his drink. He scanned the room quickly, to assess and plan his next steps. He was interrupted by a hand on his shoulder. There was an air of over familiarity among the upper crust of this city. Everyone wanted to act like they knew him personally when he had only just arrived. Perhaps that was the allure of being the shiny new toy. 

“Loki!” The Grandmaster announced loudly as he turned Loki to face him. The taller man slung his arm around Loki’s shoulders. “Come, let me introduce you to some people.”  

And Loki knew better than to refuse. He was more than fine with playing along with the games of Sakaar. He knew when to play nice and when to bare his teeth. Besides, this was not his home world, nor was it one that he was familiar with, like Midgard. He knew he wouldn’t get far on his own.  

~*~*~*~*~ 

Loki spent the entire evening held firmly to the Grandmaster’s side. He laughed and socialized with everyone put before him. He didn’t even balk when the Grandmaster’s hands began to wander on his body after a few drinks. Loki had become an expert at redirecting the Grandmaster when he got a little too handsy for his liking. Loki would do many things to ensure his own safety, but he was not inclined to whore himself out for it.   

Laughter surrounded him and Loki clung to the approval with every bit of strength he had. He kept up his ever-charming smile as he carefully watched the expressions of everyone around him. He knew he was performing exceedingly well, and some part of him relaxed as one of the Grandmaster’s associates patted his arm politely.  

“I say, you must tell us where you found him, Grandmaster,” she said in a delighted tone.  

The Grandmaster simply chuckled. “Would you believe he fell out of the sky like an angel?” 

“I was so sure you were going to tell us he was another find by that pet scrapper of yours. I’m fairly sure if you were to cut her, she would bleed Demon Rum.” Another one chimed in, earning another way of laughter from the group.  

“Come now, Antonios,” said the Grandmaster. “Many here could say the same about you, the way you down those Mai-Tais.”  

“Like you have any room to talk. I’ve seen you with your Xandarian whiskey,” Loki added playfully.  

The circle fell silent as all eyes turned to the Grandmaster. Loki felt his heart stop in his chest as he took in the Grandmaster’s stormy expression. It was unreadable and the tension in the room became so thick, Loki felt like it was difficult to breath.  

The the Grandmaster laughed.  

“What did I tell you,” the Grandmaster said with a wide grin before he wrapped his arm around Loki’s shoulders. “He’s quick witted this one.”  

Just like that the tension broke, and soon the conversation began to flow once more. Loki continued to charm and dazzle, and he could almost forget the flash of anger he saw in his benefactor’s eyes. 

~*~*~*~*~ 

Loki had no idea what time it was when he was so rudely dragged from his bed.  

On instinct he tried to fight off his assailants, and he put up a valiant effort despite there being more of them than there were of him. Suddenly, he felt one of them slap something cold and metal onto his neck, and then a sharp stab of pain.  

An obedience disk? Why would-  

Then he watched as one of the Grandmaster’s guards pressed a button on a remote, and Loki felt the last of the fight leave his body. He was caught by several pairs of hands before he could hit the floor, and he was dragged out of his luxurious accommodations.  

As he was dragged through the grand halls of the Grandmaster’s home, Loki slowly began to come back to awareness. Something was terribly wrong, and there must have been some mistake. He had been so careful. He did everything he could do to stay on the Grandmaster’s good side.  

Well, almost everything.  

Was that what this was? Had the Grandmaster grown tired of waiting? Had he decided he had had enough of Loki’s subtle refusals for a more intimate relationship? He shuddered as he remembered the Grandmaster telling him about the more erotic uses for the obedience disks.  

However, much to Loki’s relief (and slight horror), the guards did not bring him to the Grandmaster’s chambers. Instead, he was thrown to the floor in front of the Grandmaster’s seat, which anyone would sense would recognize it for the throne it was.  

The Grandmaster reclined in the chair with his legs crossed, his head propped up on one arm as he looked down at Loki with a cold smile. “I must know, did you like it?”  

Loki pushed himself up from the floor. “I must admit, I am at a loss here. Did I like what?” He asked, careful to keep his tone as neutral as possible. In his short time on Sakaar he had learned that the Grandmaster was nothing if not mercurial. Loki was sure if he could just weather whatever storm the man threw his way, he would survive the night.  

“Making them all laugh at me,” the Grandmaster supplied, his voice distressingly detached. “Did you like the attention? Don’t lie, I know you did.”  

Loki cleared his throat as he thought through what he would say. “I will admit, I find myself undeserving of your attention, but if you deem me worthy, Grandmaster, than of course I will enjoy it.” He knew he was laying the flattery on a little thick, but Loki could sense something had changed.  

This was no longer the Grandmaster he knew. The eccentric ruler who was obsessed with him and had a penchant for wandering hands. No. This was the tyrant who ruled over Sakaar with an iron fist. The creator of one of the cruelest games of deathsport throughout the known universe.  

The smile dropped from the Grandmaster’s lips. “Attention is like an addiction to you, isn’t it my little trickster. Well, fine then. I’ll make sure you have plenty of attention from now on.” He turned his attention towards the guards. “Put him with the others.”  

“Grandmaster, wait!” Loki cried as the guards surrounded him. The one holding the remote pressed the button activating his obedience disk, and that was the last thing Loki remembered.  

~*~*~*~*~ 

“You must get word to the Grandmaster,” Loki demanded once more from behind the bars that kept him confined. “My being here is a mistake, and I just need to speak with him!”  

He was met with only laughter from the scrapers at the bar. His pleading had fallen on deaf ears once more. What else was new? He sighed heavily before walking over to the extensive rack of weapons. Some of the other gladiators were picking their weapons carefully, perusing the options before them.  

Loki closed his eyes and shook his head. He knew he was a skilled fighter, and a brilliant tactician. But these types of fights were not about skill or strategy. It was about brute strength and barbarism. He was not sure how long he was survive in such a battle.  

“You sure are desperate to get the Grandmaster’s attention,” a new voice came from behind him, the tone thick with amusement.  

Loki turned to face you, an irritated look on his face. “I’m not supposed to be down here,” he insisted once more. He had seen some of these fights from the Grandmaster’s private box, and he never expected to find himself in the arena.  

“None of us are,” you replied with a shrug before crossing your arms. 

“But I am a god,” Loki continued.  

“And so is Ares, but he got trapped here just as you.” Your eyes looked him up and down, assessing him carefully. “But it’s not so bad, if you play your cards right. I think you could do quite well for yourself here.”  

Loki scoffed. “Do I strike you as some barbarian?”  

“No,” you answered honestly. “But you strike me as a showman, and that’s all this is. One big show.”  

Loki tilted his head in confusion, and it took everything you had not to laugh.  

“Most of the people on Sakaar don’t want bloodshed. They want entertainment, which I am confident you can provide,” you explained to him slowly. “I’ve heard them call you God of Mischief. Lean into that, play the trickster. The crowd will eat that up.”  

Loki’s eyes widened as he realized you were serious. “I don’t care about providing entertainment to the masses. I care about getting my freedom,” he insisted.  

“Well there’s only one way to do that, and that’s to fight the Grandmaster’s champion,” you explained before gesturing to the side. “See there, that’s Doug.”  

Loki followed you gesture to look at the large being with purple skin excitedly picking up his shield and mace. Determination and confidence all but radiated from his body.  

“Doug is going to die today,” you said, not bothering to lower your voice. “Because everyone who faces the Grandmaster’s champion dies. If you ask me, freedom is overrated. Especially when you can make a comfortable life for yourself in the lower fights.”  

“Comfortable?” Loki asked skeptically. “You consider that dingy never-ending hall they keep us in to be comfortable?”  

You grinned. “No, I consider my apartments in the top performer’s suites to be comfortable. It is possible to move your way up, you know.”  

With that, you plucked a sword from the weapons rack and smiled at him.  

“They’ve all been dying for a little drama,” you said. “Just give them what they want, and you’ll have everything you could ever need, Mischief.”  

You winked at him before heading to the ramp that lead to the arena. Loki watched as you high-fived one of the guards, earning an indulgent smile from the stoic man who held the remote to Loki’s obedience disk. You began to bounce on the heels of your feet, clearly amping yourself as you waited for the large doors to open. Loki could hear the dulled roar of applause get louder as the doors opened and you ran through it, primed to work the crowd.  

Loki turned away to face the rack of weapons once more, when his eyes fell on two sleek daggers. The smaller blades were left forgotten and abandoned in favor of the other more fiercer options. Loki gingerly picked them up before giving them a twirl to test the balance on them.  

They were perfect. 

Drama, you said? Well, Loki was sure he was more than capable of providing a little drama.  

In this one, you faltered. For a fleeting moment, you let doubt cloud your pursuit of Loki. Instead of remaining determined, you gave up. You let him go.

“Fine,” you said, doing your best to swallow back the tears as you released his shirt. “Sleep well, Loki.”

He closed his eyes tight as he listened to you walk away. You would head back to the party, to mingle and amaze every potential suitor. You would find and love, and he would move past this pathetic obsession he had with you. He would have no choice but to.

It was better this way.

~*~*~*~*~

Unfortunately, fate was not so kind and only half of his prediction came true. After leaving him alone to sulk, you indeed amazed every potential suitor. You dazzled the masses, and they vied for your attention. Loki heard all about it the next morning. Thor was nothing if not a faithful and insistent storyteller.

However, his pathetic obsession did not come to an end. If anything, it was made worse. He would never forget the look on your face when you told him about the first one you took to your bed. You were giggling and bashful as you recounted the sordid tale to your best friend. Unbeknownst to you, every word was like a dagger to his chest.

It should have been me. His soul screamed from the frozen wasteland that took hold of his chest. It should have been me!

That night he drowned his sorrows in ale, and the next morning he awoke beside one of the tavern wenches. His memory was hazy, and his chest ached when he saw she had your hair color. He always pictured his first time with you, and in his drunken stupor he sought the next best thing.

It seemed his pathetic obsession had become even more pathetic.

And remained so for the decades to come.

~*~*~*~*~

“I am in love,” you announced proudly one afternoon.

Loki shot you a suspicious look. Having been your best friend for nearly a millennia, he claimed the privilege of knowing you better than anyone. He knew that your interest flitted from person to person. You never settled in and never committed to anything serious. It was something he was deeply thankful for. He knew he would not survive it if you were to actually find love. If you were to marry, he was sure what was left of his withered heart would crumbled to dust.

“I mean it this time,” you insisted. “He’s perfect and everything I want.”

“You said that about the last one,” Loki reminded you with a chuckle. “And the one before that, and the one before that.”

You shook your head as you stepped forward, cupping his face in your hands. “I’m going to marry this one.”

Loki’s eyes widened. Never before had you made such a proclamation. Sure, you spoke poetically about your previous lovers, but you never spoke of marriage before. Loki sought comfort in the fact that you avoided marriage like it was a plague. When your previous lover, Harald, began to hint about proposing, you went to Loki to ask him if faking your own death was gauche.

It was.

But now something had clearly changed.  

“He’s asked you to marry him?” Loki’s voice dropped to a whisper. The ever present pang in his chest flared as if the wound was torn anew.

“Well not yet,” you answered, dropping your hands from his face. Loki felt a rush of oxygen flood his lungs. “In all truth, he hasn’t noticed me yet. Not in that way at least.”

Loki tilted his head questioningly. “Why not just tell him how you feel?”

You sighed. “Because if I tell him I love him, I fear he will not take me seriously. I fear he may laugh at me.”

Loki’s expression darkened. “If anyone laughs at you when you bare your heart to them, they do not deserve of keeping it.” He could feel a rage building within him.  

“I know that,” you waved him off. “But, if I can show him that I can be serious and committed.”

Loki’s stomach dropped, as he knew what you were thinking. It was too cruel, even for you. Surely you weren’t asking him to-

 “Please, Loki,” you asked him as you knelled on the floor beside his chair. You clasped your hands together in a begging motion. “You’re my best friend in the whole world, if anyone can help me prove that I can be serious about a relationship, it’s you.”

And just like that, his reluctance evaporated. You always knew how to get him to do what you wanted. You had him wrapped around his finger, ever since you were both children. Even though it made him sick to his stomach, he knew he could never say no to you.

Even as his chest constricted painfully, Loki found himself nodding. “Alright,” he said, sounding a little breathless. “Alright, fine just please, stand up!”

You grinned and pounced on him, hugging him tightly. “Thank you, Loki! Oh, I love you!”

Loki allowed himself to return your hug. His hand falling naturally to the small of your back, and his face gently nuzzled into your neck. It wasn’t often he let himself take comfort in your embrace.

“Yes, yes, I love you too,” he mumbled, as your scent invaded his mind. His arms tightened around you just a bit. “What are friends for?”

Oh, this was going to end very, very badly.  

~*~*~*~*~

On the first day of your little ruse, you convinced Loki to attend a festival in Asgard with you. You looped your arm in his like it belonged there. You pressed your body up against his side as he led you through the stalls set up in the street. It was surprising just how natural this act felt. The two of you spent most of your time together anyway, and you often enjoyed making him take you to festivals such as these (much to your father’s chagrin). He could almost forget that this was just part of a larger performance.

“Quick, kiss me,” you whispered in Loki’s ear, breaking him from his thoughts.

Loki turned to look at you, just barely keeping the surprise from his face. His eyes immediately fell to your lips, soft and already parted for him. Memories of the first and only time he kissed you came rushing back to the surface. Memories he worked very hard to keep locked away.

The scent of old books in the library.

The sounds of your quiet moans.

The taste of your blood on his tongue.

Your expression was perfectly coy. “He’s here,” you murmured softly. “We have to make it convincing. Kiss me.”

Then you damned his sanity by biting your lip.

Loki’s lips were on yours before he could process what he was doing. Instead of cupping your face as he had last time, he let his fingers dig into your waist. The dress you were wearing was soft and silky, a perfect reflection of the ever-warming spring days Asgard was enjoying. The thin fabric did nothing to conceal the heat of your skin to his desperate fingers.

The kiss was not as brutal as your first one, so long ago. A distant voice in Loki’s mind reminded him that he was playing a part. The part of a besotted lover. It was not a difficult part to play, except for one small detail.

If Loki were truly your lover, he would be able to savor this kiss the way one would savor a glass from an exquisite bottle of wine. Slowly and with the knowledge that there was always more where that came from. Instead, he ravaged you the way a man stranded in the desert would ravage a goblet of water. With all the desperation of a man who knew that he had a limited supply and it would never be enough.

And even if by some miracle this farce lasted for the rest of his life, Loki knew he would never have enough of you.

It took one of the stall vendors clearing their throat for the two of you to pull away from one another. Loki could feel his heart racing in his chest, and he was pleased to note that his heart beat in time with your labored pants.

You looked up at him, your cheeks radiating heat as you struggled to catch your breath.

Loki smirked before whispering in your ear. “Convincing enough?”

He delighted in the way you shivered when his lip brushed against the shell of your ear.

You gave him a sly grin. “I’m sure we convinced him,” you said before taking his arm and leading him further into the festival.

For the rest of the day, Loki found himself looking out of the corner of his eye, trying to catch of glimpse of the man who stole your heart. The man whose attention you were so eager to grab. Yet every time, his search came up empty.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“I heard that you have a new lover,” Thor said with a wide grin as he walked into Loki’s study. “Or rather, not so new.”

Loki groaned and let his head fall forward onto the papers he was diligently working on. This was not the conversation he wanted to be having so early in the morning.

“Come now, brother,” Thor laughed before patting Loki on the shoulder just a little too rough. “I am not here to say I told you so. I am only here to congratulate you. This is long overdue.”

Loki slowly lifted his head from his desk, ready to tell Thor the truth of his arrangement with you. However, the words were stolen from his throat as a terrible though occurred to him.

What if it was Thor?

You never told him who it was that you were trying to make jealous. What if it was his own brother? Loki’s stomach turned at the thought. Surely you wouldn’t use him to make his own brother jealous.

You and Loki spent so much of your childhood pulling pranks on Thor, and poking fun at him. He couldn’t be Thor. It just couldn’t be.

It couldn't.

~*~*~*~*~

“You know you never told me who it is,” Loki murmured, as his thumb brushed against the back of your hand.

You hummed in response as your turned to look at him, the performance before you long forgotten.

The actors of the play continued to say their lines, adding to the background noise as Loki gathered his courage.

“The one we’re doing this for,” he answered, making sure to keep his voice low. Any bystander would think you were just two lovers whispering sweet nothings to each other. “The man that you intend to let steal you away from me.”

You chuckled softly and shook your head. “Don’t worry about that,” you replied. Then you rested your head on his shoulder, and cuddled as close as the theater seats would allow you to.

As much as Loki wanted to drop the matter and go back to pretending to watch the play, he just couldn’t let go of the dread that haunted him since that morning. The idea that you had fallen for his brother tormented him.

“It’s not Thor, is it?” He asked, although to his ears it sounded more like he was pleading with you.

All of his fears were alleviated when you pulled away to look at him. The pure look of disgust on your face could only be genuine.  “That is disgusting, he’s like a brother to me,” you whispered.

Loki felt the vise around his heart ease some. At least it wasn’t Thor.

“I’m sorry, love,” he said soothingly before raising a hand to caress your cheek. “I just wanted to be sure.”

Your face lit up in recognition, and your eyes softened before your leaned into his touch. Your pressed your cheek more firmly into his hand before sighing softly. “I would never use you that way,” you assured him. You knew how insecure Loki could get when it came to Thor. “I swear to you, it’s not Thor.”

Loki smiled softly, relieved at your promise. “Thank you,” he whispered. Then he gently coaxed you to lay your head on his shoulder once more. Content with how well your body fit against his, Loki turned his attention back to the stage. Perhaps if he started paying attention now, he could piece together whatever it was this play was supposed to be about.  

~*~*~*~*~

Weeks went by and the two of you continued your act. Over that time, it began to feel more natural for Loki. He no longer hesitated to reach out and grab your hand. When he traced the contours of your face with his fingers, he no longer felt a wave of self-loathing wash over him.

And when he kissed you, he learned to take his time yet leave you wanting more. He considered it a personal success when you couldn’t help but lean into him when he pulled away. Despite your intention to win the heart of another, you seemed to preen under Loki’s attention. You were always an affectionate creature, and perhaps this was just a natural extension of that.

Soon enough it was the night of the summer solstice. Every year there was a grand feast. The twins, Freya and Freyr, would agonize over the details for weeks before the settled on the exact same arrangements as they had every year. The sweltering heat and the inevitable fall into debauchery was usually enough to make Loki pass of the feast. Most years he spent the summer solstice in his room or on Midgard.

However, this year was different. This year, you would not let him slip away quietly. This year, he would attend the feast with you on his arm. A jewel which half of the attendees would covet. But there was only one that you seemed to care about.

Just yesterday, you came to Loki and excitedly told him that you were pretty sure the plan was working.

Part of Loki was relieved that this ruse would soon be over, but he was mostly heartbroken. He finished adjusting his clothes in the mirror he heard a knock at his door. He knew it was you. You insisted that once you were dressed, you would meet him in his room and then the two of you would attend the feast together.

Loki sighed heavily before he turned away from the mirror and went to open the door.

Nothing could have prepared him for the sight that lay before him.

Ever since Loki first laid eyes on you, you were the most beautiful person in the world to him. Even when you were covered in mud or in the middle of fighting a cold. Your beauty transcended petty vanity. Your beauty came from the very depths of your soul and radiated for anyone who cared to look.

That being said, the dress you were wearing took your beauty and elevated it to a whole new dimension.

You were damn near ethereal.  

The dress was surprisingly simple, but far from plain. Your shoulders were left bare, but long, gauzy sleeves clung to your biceps and fluttered gracefully behind you. The bodice alternated between silk and sheer chiffon, giving tantalizing glimpses of the skin beneath the dress. The skirt was long, and the fabric flowed like a waterfall down to the ground, but Loki could see a sliver of your thigh through a well concealed slit.

And of all the colors you could have chosen, you had to pick green.

You smiled at him as he attempted to reteach himself how to speak coherent sentences. A challenge, even with his reputation for having a silver tongue.

“Is it too much?” You asked, a rare moment of insecurity poking through your usual facade. You put a lot of effort into being confident and charismatic, but Loki could see through that. He knew it was just another performance for you. You felt the need to prove to the people of the court that you were worth more than your common blood allowed. He knew that you felt you had to work twice as hard as any of the other nobles but to feel like you belonged.

None of that mattered to him, because in his mind you always belonged at his side.

“You look…” he trailed off before chuckling nervously. “I can speak every language that is used throughout the realms, and I don’t think there is a word in any of them that will adequately describe just how incredible you are.”

The nervousness slipped from your expression, and your smile turned warm and genuine. Norns, what Loki would give to see you smile like that every day. He would give almost anything for the right to make you smile like that for as long as he lived.

“Here, I got something for you,” you said before stepping into his room. Loki carefully closed the door behind you as you rifled through your small bag. You grinned triumphantly when you found what you were looking for. “Here. I thought you could wear it tonight. It would mean a lot to me.”

You handed him a small flower, with white petals tinged with pink. He recognized the flower immediately. It was one of the rare blooms that grew in his mother’s garden. If his memory served, it was the very flower that caught your eye when you first visited the palace. It was the flower that inspired you to slip away from your mother’s side and sneak into the forbidden gardens.

It was the very blossom that led you to him.

Loki stared at the petal, then he turned to look at you. His heart raced in his chest as he tried desperately not to look too deeply into the gesture. He tried not to assign some hidden meaning to something as innocuous as a plucked flower stolen from his own mother’s garden.

“Who is it,” he asked again for the first time in weeks. He had tried to tell himself that it did not matter, but in that moment as his resolve clung to dear life, he felt he needed the reminder. He needed to know the identity of the man who stole your heart. The name of the man he would spend the rest of his life cursing.

You stepped back slightly, but Loki followed you. “My love, the time for games is over,” he murmured as he crowded you with his body. “I must know who it is that we are doing this all for.”

You shuddered when your back hit the wooden door, but Loki did not relent. He could not give up, his self-control was in shreds and you held the key to the only thing that could repair it. You tilted your head back until it rested on the door so you could look up at him. He could see the conflict in your eyes.

The desire to keep your secret at war with the compulsion to give into him. Over the weeks he spent pretending to be your lover, he had seen glimpses of your true nature. Whenever he kissed you, he could see a hint of the part of you that craved this. That part of you that was eager to submit.

“A name,” he whispered in your ear, making sure to let his lips brush against the shell of your ear, which he recently learned was so sensitive. “That’s all I ask.”

He pulled his head back just enough to look at your face. He could see the lust burning in your eyes. Pride swelled in his chest, but his undoing came soon after. The moment that broke his sanity and his control came when you bit your lip.

“Loki-”

“Fuck it,” Loki growled softly as he pressed you further against the door and kissed you.

He was tired of pretending. Pretending to be a dutiful friend. Pretending that the touch of your hand on his skin did not leave him burning for hours to come. Pretending that he could ever love another when his very soul was branded with your name and had been from the moment you met in that garden all those years ago.

Loki kissed you forcefully and full of intention. He groaned when he felt you melt against him. His hands went to your wrists, and he slowly pinned them above your head. He moved slowly and kept his grasp loose, in case you wanted to pull away. But you didn’t. Instead, you arched your back away from the door in a bid to be closer to him.

“Loki,” you moaned softly when he broke the kiss, only to lay a series of kisses along your jaw and down your neck.

The sound of his name leaving your lips was enough to shatter any part of him that wanted to hesitate. He knew he was irrevocably changing your relationship. Sure, over the last few weeks he had kissed you more times than he could count, but this was different. This time he was kissing you without an audience, and not with the intention of making the one you truly wanted jealous. He was kissing you because he had to, he could not go on another moment without feeling your body against his.

With one hand holding your wrists about your head, the other began to trail down along your side. Until he found one of the slits in your dress, then he let his fingers massage your outer thigh.

“Do you consent?” Loki asked, his voice lower and huskier than you had ever heard it. Even though his control was in shambles, he could never do something to you that you did not wish for. Half of Asgard saw him as a monster, and in many ways he was one. But never to you, and never like this.

He could feel you nod eagerly as a slight whine built up in your chest.

“Use your words, pet,” he teased before nipping at your bare shoulder.

“Yes,” you choked out.

“Good girl,” he praised you, making another shiver run down your spine, before he allowed himself to gently bite your shoulder, the bare skin was too tempting for him to resist. If he could only have you for tonight, he would be sure to leave his mark on you, so that way you would have to remember him, and this.

Loki dreamed of this moment many times. He dreamed he would lay you down on his bed and that he would spend hours making loving to you. He dreamed he would take his time and worship your body. But now that the moment had finally arrived, and Loki knew this was his only chance he could not seem to stop himself. He felt like he was possessed.

The fates were cruel indeed.

He grabbed your thigh and hooked it around his waist before pressing himself between your legs. His skin felt like it was on fire as he traced his hand up your bare thigh, slipping it inside the slit in the fabric of your dress.

Your wrists wiggled in his grasp and you moaned again, adding more fuel to the fires of his insanity. Loki tightened his grip on your wrists and pulled away from your shoulder to look at your face. Your eyes were closed.

“Look at me,” he demanded roughly as his fingers dug into the meat of your thigh. “Look at me as I fuck you. I won’t have you imagining anyone else. No when it is me who makes you feel this way.”

You opened your eyes obediently, your gazed immediately locked onto his. “Loki,” you sighed in what he wanted to believe was adoration before you squeezed your leg around his waist impatiently. “Loki,” you repeated, adding a slight whimper to your voice.

“Yes, pet,” he whispered before giving into the temptation to kiss your nose. “I never imagined you would be so needy, but by the Norns I love it.”

“Loki,” you said with a slight pout. It took everything he had not to nip at your lower lip when you jut it out like that.

“Oh alright.” He grinned before stealing a quick kiss from your lips. “I’ll give you what you want. I'll always give you what you want.”

As much as Loki longed to peel the dress from your body and to bask in your naked form, there was no time for that. He adjusted your clothes with the appropriate level of urgency. Once he unfastened his trousers and shoved them out of the way, he set about to hiking your dress up towards your hips.

All the while his eyes remained locked with yours. He had to know- he needed to know that it was him you wanted. Even if it was only for tonight. Even if it was only this one time.

“Last chance, dear heart,” Loki groaned as he took himself into his own hand. “If you don’t want this, you have to tell me now.”

Your body writhed against his “Loki, please,” you begged and that was good enough for him.

Loki retained the sense of mind to ease into you slowly. In his eagerness he did not prepare you nearly as much as he would have liked, but thankfully your body welcomed him. You gasped as he sheathed himself inside of you.

“My precious darling.” He kissed your jaw. “You feel incredible around me.” A nip to your earlobe. “I’m blessed to have you.”

Your body relaxed under his praise. “Loki,” you sighed in pleasure. “I need you.”

And with most things, Loki found he could not deny you anything.

Much to his regret, Loki knew he would not last long. He had spent centuries imagining what it would be like to take you, to make love to you, and it was already almost over. Thankfully, it seemed that you were not faring much better either.

You arched into his every thrust, even as he held you pinned against the door. What little movement he allowed, you took enthusiastically. Soon enough your body began to tremble for him.

“Loki,” you groaned, your voice becoming more desperate by the second. “

“It’s alright,” he shushed you gently. “I’m here. You can let go. I have you.”

You looked up at him, your eyes shining with trust, affection, and -dare he dream- love.

“Kiss me,” you ordered him, and Loki could not help but comply.

He kissed you, savoring the way your body tightened and contracted around him as you fell over into the pit of ecstasy. He loved how the sounds of your cries muffled by his lips. He loved the slightly dazed look in your eyes as you came down from your high to realize he was still thrusting inside you.

He loved you.

Loki kissed you again to keep the words from slipping out as he reached his peak. It was too soon, it was too soon, but he just couldn’t hold back anymore. There was something about this orgasm that made any other one he ever experienced pale by comparison. He felt as though he died and went straight to Valhalla upon hearing your soft moan as he came inside you.

His heart was racing, and he could feel his hair sticking to his forehead with sweat. But none of that mattered when he looked into your eyes. Slightly dazed and drunk from pleasure, you looked at him like the cat who ate the canary.

Loki carefully let go of your wrists and chuckled softly when you all but collapsed into his chest. Loki adjusted his hold on your body so he could better support you as you slumped against him in exhaustion. Your arms wrapped around his neck as you cuddled close to him, and once more, Loki’s heart refused to beat in a normal fashion.

“Oh, my love,” Loki murmured as he brought his hand up to cup the back of your head and gently massaged your scalp. “I’m afraid that I won’t be able to let you go after this.”

You hummed softly as you lolled your head to the side to look at him better. “Who said I wanted you to let me go?”

Wait what?

Loki raised an eyebrow. “What about your mystery man?”

Then it was your turn to laugh. It was a soft giggle as your shook your head. “You asked for a name, and I gave you one.” You grinned slyly before dropping your voice seductively. “Over and over and over again.”

Loki frowned as he tried to make sense of your words. Then suddenly, everything clicked into place. This whole time, the man that you wanted to make jealous, the man that you had fallen so head over heels in love with, the man Loki imagined sinking his dagger into the stomach of…

It was him.

“You wicked creature,” his voice rumbled as he tangled his fingers in the roots of your hair to get a better look at your face. “To think they call me the God of Mischief.”

You grinned unrepentant. “Shall I be punished for my offense?”

“Nightly,” he promised with a growl before claiming your lips in a bruising, soul searing kiss. The first of many you would share.

Now I have seen countless worlds and countless stories, and each one is dear to me. However, I will admit that I am especially fond of any story that includes you and Loki. As I have said before and I will most likely say again, you and Loki have a habit of finding your way to one another. As a spectator of the vast multiverse, I find it difficult to believe in destiny.  

But you and Loki are destined to find one another, no matter what.  

However, that excuse had run dry right about the time he realized he was taking more unnecessary risks in the field just so he could visit you when he returned to the tower that had become his home. Once he realized he was intentionally hurting himself just for the chance you would patch him up, Loki had to admit that his desire went fair past your healing powers.

Loki was addicted to your touch.

He responded to that revelation in the manner that most befit him. He withdrew from your presence entirely and hid himself away. No matter how much Thor pestered him to join in team building activities, Loki declined, knowing you would most likely be there. Even as his heart lurched and begged him to go. He couldn’t. He just couldn’t.

This desire, this need, was a weakness, one that Loki could not afford when surrounded by so many who still reviled him. He had to refrain in order to strengthen his resolve. He could not indulge himself in this addiction.

He could not indulge himself in you.

~*~*~*~*~

Loki was, unfortunately, accustomed to waking up in a cold sweat. His dreams still plague his mind, even in his waking hours. The blood and the pain. The manipulation and the lies. All of it swirled around him until he wasn’t fully sure of what was real.

He looked down at his hand and flexed his fingers, silently examining his movements, making sure he felt every single ligament that curled and bent. He felt the slight discomfort from bending the knuckle on his right index finger, the one Thor had accidentally broken when they were children and left behind a permanent ache. Only then did his shoulders become less tense.

Real.

He was awake. Loki looked around his room, and complete darkness threatened to envelop him. The blackness called to him and smothered him simultaneously. He pushed the blankets aside and got out of bed.

He would not be going back to sleep anytime soon anyways.

Sometime later, he was in an unfamiliar part of the tower. Loki hadn’t been paying attention fully as he walked. He let his feet carry him through the never-ending hallways. His clearance allowed him access to most floors of the tower, so he hadn’t even bothered to look at the number he pressed in the elevator. He just needed space, away from his bedroom and away from the terrors that plague his mind. The threats to come and the tragedies behind.

“Are you alright?”

He shut his eyes, as if willing the voice away. It was sweet in a way that he had grown accustomed to, and it was the very voice he had spent so much time and energy avoiding.

His traitorous feet turned to better face you. You looked concerned, in your sweatpants and a steaming mug in your hand. Your eyes scanned over him, assessing for injuries.

It was a shame that the damage you were looking for resided in his head and his heart, and not on his skin.

“Shouldn’t you be asleep?” He asked, his voice dry and cracked. Loki realized it was his first time speaking since he had woken up, however long ago that was.

You only smiled at him softly, a warm glow radiating from you. “I could ask the same question.” You tilted your head, giving him a curious look. “And you are standing in my living room, so I think my question is more valid.”

That was when Loki finally looked around, taking care actually see his environment. He saw the couch, the blanket that was haphazardly thrown over a chair. It was smaller than the common rooms on the upper levels of the tower. Smaller and homier.

“My apologies, I don’t know how I got here,” he said doing his best to conceal the flush that threatened to betray his true feelings.

Somehow in his sleep depriving wanderings he stumbled into your personal living quarters. He had blindly pressed his palm to whatever access panel he saw, and he kept walking if it allowed him forward.  He had no intentions of intruding on you at such a late hour.

You seemed miraculously unperturbed by that. “I had the security system grant you access a few weeks ago.”

“Why in the nine realms would you do that?” He asked, his eyes widening.

You simply shrugged. “I noticed that you were avoiding me in my office, and I was worried you would need me.”

You said it as if it were that simple. As if his reliance on you was anything other than intolerable. It felt strangely nice, to be thought of in such a way. As if his needs were worthy of note.

“If you don’t need me, you are welcome to stay,” you offered. “I’m on call tonight, so I’m not going to be sleeping any time soon. I could use the company.”

You walked away from him to walk around to the front of the couch. You sat down, leaving the invitation open to him. All without putting pressure on him for his response. He could turn around and leave, and you would not hold it against him.

Or he could stay.

Part of him really wanted to stay. The part of him that was sick of the nightmares. The part of him that was tired of never sating his hunger. The part of him that was just plain exhausted.

He slowly rounded the couch like a cat that was easy to scare. You pretended not to notice his hesitation as you flipped through channels on the TV.

You only turned to him once he settled on the couch next to you. “Have you seen Doctor Who?” You asked him.

The casualness of your tone nearly caught him off guard. He cleared his throat. “No, I can’t say I have.”

“I think you’ll like it,” you said before you queued it up on the TV.

Then you curled up next to him, and the pressure from your head resting on his shoulder calmed his frayed nerves better than any vintage wine ever had. He gingerly wrapped his arm around you, marveling at how well your body fit against his. He feared his self-restraint was in peril, but at your soft and contented sigh, Loki found he no longer cared.

He figured he could allow himself this one little indulgence.

Just this once.