((oocly posting some dms so yall can have context :p))
peises: I know I can't do muc)( now but I )(ope you're alrig)(t!
2twopiid: iit'2 fiine. you don't have two worry about me, iit'2 dumb.
peises: I don't t)(ink I understand muc)( but I'm s)(ore it's not dumb. 38P
peises: Do you want to glub about it?
2twopiid: iidk, iit'2 ju2t that ii wa2 pretty 2ure ii wa2 done wiith all thii2 guiilt, or liike guiilt by a22ociiatiion, or whatever fucked up 2emii-uniiver2al alternate fuckery emotiion2 thii2 kiind of 2hiit iinvolve2. but ii gue22 iit doe2n't take a whole lot two undo the work ii put iintwo gettiing over my fuckiing 2elf.
peises: W)(at are you guilty about? 38O
2twopiid: let'2 ju2t 2ay ii wa2 tangentiially re2pon2iible for a death (2he ii2 fiine now), and a2 iit turn2 out, ii am not the only 2ollux re2pon2iible who wa2 u2ed a2 a twol for murder.
peises: You never told me t)(is. I mean, you s)(ouldn't eel guilty if s)(e's okay now and it wasn't completely your fault. 38(
)(ow long ago did t)(is )(appen??
2twopiid: iit wa2 a long tiime ago. ii wa2 5 2weep2 almo2t 6. ii don't actwoally remember the actual event at all, but ii know iit happened.
2twopiid: ii diidn't tell you cau2e ii diidn't want two giive you a rea2on two thiink le22 of me.
peises: You just told me you were a kid! I won't t)(ink less of you because of somet)(ing t)(at )(appened w)(en you weren't able to make c)(oices for yours)(ellf.
2twopiid: ok, but who 2ay2 you won't thiink le22 of me for my iinabiiliity two get over iit, even though 2he ii2 fiine iin my tiimeliine.
peises: M-E! I would say t)(at. Do you t)(ink MURD-----ER is somet)(ing you get over in a few sweeps?
peises: T)(ere are t)(ings I still get upset aboat, do you t)(ink less of me?
2twopiid: of cour2e ii don't wtf.
peises: But you some)(ow cannot apply t)(at to yourself! 38(
peises: I eel more bad for you t)(an anyt)(ing because I can't kelp you or conc)(vince you otterwise.
2twopiid: ii don't want you two have two feel bad for me. ii don't want two be re2pon2iible for you feeliing anythiing that ii2n't good.
peises: It doesn't always )(ave to be aboat me, eit)(er- it's not dumb to eel t)(ings!! I like you because of w)(o you are now, and it doesn't matter to me w)(at )(appened w)(en you were itty bitty.
2twopiid: ii thiink iit ii2 2ometiime2 pretty dumb two feel certaiin thiing2. and who ii am now ii2 a re2ult of the bad 2hiit that happened two me. ii would probably be le22 terriible and fucked up iif none of that 2tuff ever happened, and maybe iit would make more 2en2e that you liike me iif ii wa2 fundamentally a diifferent per2on.
peises: You're not making any sense!! 38(
peises: I told you I like you for you and I just wis)( you could get t)(at, genuinely!
2twopiid: ii'm not 2ayiing you 2houldn't, ii'm ju2t 2ayiing ii am not a2 good of a per2on a2 ii thiink you beliieve ii am.
2twopiid: are you really cryiing? becau2e iif you are ii wiill back off. ii'm tryiing two explaiin my2elf not be an a22hole.
peises: I am not but I am also not far from it! It's just frustrating. 38(
2twopiid: ok. ii'm 2orry. iit'2 ju2t. iidk, you 2aiid ii wa2n't makiing 2en2e, but iif you 2pend any tiime thiinkiing about iit, none of thii2 really doe2. what you could po22iibly 2ee iin me that ii2 worth all thii2 bull2hiit ii2 a my2tery! ii ju2t really don't get iit.
peises: I don't want you to conc)(stantly question w)(at I sea in you! I still am going to fig)(t for you but I am starting to doubt t)(ings. 38(!
peises: I feel )(-ELPL-ESS.
2twopiid: you have doubt2?
peises: I want to )(elp you but you s)(ould let me if t)(is is going to work!
peises: W)(at do you want to do??
2twopiid: ii don't know. ii want thii2 two work, but ii am not the be2t at lettiing good thiing2 2tay that way.
peises: Maybe we s)(ould take a s)(ort break until I get back. 38P
peises: I t)(ink we s)(ould t)(ink about t)(ings!
2twopiid: ii2 that what you want two do?
2twopiid: when are you comiing back?
peises: I'm not sure. A mont)( or two, maybe, but it reely depends on w)(en -Eridan )(as seen enoug)( of -Eart)(!
peises: Maybe we can try to find a little peace alone and we can work it out w)(en t)(e tide comes. 38(
2twopiid: ii2 that really what you want?
peises: It's not w)(at I want but it's w)(at I t)(ink will at least keep us going, even if it is later. W)(at do you want?
2twopiid: iidk, ii want a lot of thiing2. ii want two not ruiin thii2. ii want two feel liike ii de2erve haviing you iin my liife. ii want whatever ii2 goiing two make thii2 work long-term. iif you genuiinely thiink takiing a break ii2 goiing two be good for u2, ii don't really want two do that but ii wiill becau2e ii do love you, and liike ii 2aiid, ii want whatever ii2 goiing two make thii2 work.
peises: Maybe just a few days or weeks, t)(en? It can't )(urt us, rig)(t?? I don't want to just call it quits. 38(
2twopiid: why don't we ju2t 2tart wiith a few day2, and iif you 2tiill thiink a longer break ii2 a good iidea, we can talk about iit then. ii feel liike makiing the decii2iion whiile we are up2et ii2 maybe not the be2t iidea.
peises: T)(at works for me. 38*
peises: I mean, I want t)(ings to be okay! I reely do.
peises: It just mig)(t take some tide, you know? P)(-EW, okay.
2twopiid: yeah.ii'm 2orry.
peises: Don't be! I t)(ink t)(ings will be better after.
peises: I still LOV-E you.
2twopiid: ii love you two.