#lobo.

By Devon “The Man of your dreams” James

Welcome nerds of dubious morals and ill-defined labels that characterizes those aforementioned dubious morals which are loose even by dubious standards. I present thee with my Anti-Villain of the Week.

Before I get going, I feel I must specify that an Anti-Villain is a real thing and I didn't just make it up just because I'm running out of Anti-Hero ideas. You'll know that I'm running out of ideas when I introduce my Anti-Stock character of the week. An Anti-Villain is just like an Anti-Hero, except not at all. Its like a Bizarro Anti-Hero. While an Anti-Hero uses unheroic means to achieve heroic ends, like murdering tons of mobsters to achieve a crime free society while making a big exception to the crime of murdering criminals, an Anti-Villain uses heroic means to achieve unheroic ends.

As you may have noticed, we don't see a whole lot of these characters because it doesn't make any f***ing sense. Still, I believe I've managed to find a character that fits the bill.

So who is this character that I deemed worthy of my first Anti-Villain of the Week? Why, it is  none other than Slade "Deathstroke the Terminator" Wilson, former soldier and experiment for the United States military, current mercenary for hire, and among the top 5 greatest characters whom wear eye patches.

Above are just a few other fine examples of badasses in eye patches.

Oh, and he makes his disability obvious to highlight the fact that he doesn't need two eyes to kick your ass. 

There were some tweeks of this character throughout DCs long history, but the constant is that he is an ex-military officer who is well studied in martial arts all over, and underwent a program to make him into a Super Soldier. He also dated his martial arts teacher and had kids with her.

So, he has a decorated career in the military, a wife who taught him everything he knows in kicking ass, beautiful kids, and a healthy life thanks to super experiments that worked out well for him. What's next? Retire? Screw that noise. Slade "The Deathstroke Terminator" Wilson is on a strict diet of eating the severed balls of his enemies.

Well, the stories usually portray him as either a villain or anti-hero.

Anti-Hero exploits includes him attacking the Teen Titans to secure his daughter's place on the team and trying to build a Lazarus machine to bring back the dead.

This picture has nothing to do with that last sentence, I just thought I went too long without showing something awesome. 

He would have made a great Anti-Hero to talk about, but recent interpretations have conveyed him as the incredibly rare anti-villain.

His revamp shows that he is a man incredibly driven by honor. In fact, he considers himself as a knight or Samurai who is bound by a strict code. Given that these aren't old times, he has updated the concept to factor in that there are no kingdoms anymore and honor is a tricky subject. In fact, if honor is applied today, it is merely a measure of your worth and the only thing close to that today is money as how much people are willing to pay for you is a great indicator or how much you are worth.

Judging by his bank statements, he seems pretty honorable to me. 

"but Devon, if he is killing for money, than isn't his method and goal simply unheroic, making him a villain"

Don't you think I already anticipated your bulls***, commenter on the internet who doesn't exist?

You see, the goal is actually the killings, not the money. Money is just a fun perk. He doesn't prove his worth unless he has high priority kills. Everything else, the training, the armor, and the tiger blood milkshakes, its all so that he can kill someone to cement his worth in a world with a twisted sense of honor as being synonymous with monetary credit. The heroic means is his honor and superior physical and mental stamina that he developed through practice, reading, and military experimentation. The villainous ends is slitting the throat of his mark which ultimately increases his value just so he can rub it in his dying father's stupid face.

His current exploits include fighting Lobo, DC's parody to Marvel's "in your face" type characters. Lobo  rides a motorcycle, uses meat hooks, smokes, drinks, curses, looks like a member from Kiss, and he has accelerated healing. Also, he can punch Superman in the face with ease, and Slade is taking him on. 

For taking hard work, determination, and honor, and somehow making those concepts evil, I award Slade "The Deathstroke Toothfairy Terminator" Wilson, my Anti-Villain of the Week.

If you have to fight this guy, just know that Batman only beat him a few times because Slade let him win, and Batman has the reputation of being invincible. Both are all about strategy, reputation, but Slade had the edge of being super enhanced to the point where he can punch the flash at super speed. Slade is a guy so badass, that a piece of his badassness split off and grew into Wade Wilson in the Marvel Universe.

If you must fight Slade, try soiling yourself until he realizes that killing you would only hinder his reputation. Also, if you want to take a more preventative approach, you can try not being a high priority target.