#listslistslists

I didn't think I was ready for 2015, I am still pretty terrified of everything that is coming up. But I think I can finally look at 2014 and say, that's the past. Let's do a final (honest) look at my 2014. It's going to be good and really bad. But in the end it's over. And I'm saying farewell. This was hard to write. 

2014:

-Met Wes Anderson

-Photographed the President, OutKast, and countless other cool things.

-Had authority positions in the paper and magazine I worked in. 

-Organized events to help girls around the world. 

-I broke up with a shitty controlling boyfriend finally after three years of dealing with physical and emotional abuse. 

-I learned to be who I am, say what I want and be what I want to be. I started saying fuck a lot and wore a fair share of crop tops. 

-I fell in love for the first time.The real kind of love. And it was amazing. And in the end it broke my heart. 

-I made some amazing friends. And the friends I had before became even stronger. I learned more on how to be a better friend. And I am lucky to have had some amazing ladies fill my life. I hope they never leave. 

-I discovered my sexual freedom. Learned to love my body and also that I can be independent in that sense and embrace it. 

-I watched my dad fall in love and move to South Dakota. 

-I addressed a lot of pain in my past. I finally talked about the early abuse from my biological mom. I finally talked about sexual abuse I suffered as a child. The hardship from growing up in a single parent household with a bipolar father. And a lot of other shit. The things in my life that I had tucked away into a perfect image... I let break me. 

-I broke. Slowly then all at once. I hated myself. I realized that my whole life I have had this codependency issue. I couldn't cope anymore and I shattered.

-I was almost not here. I was hospitalized for days after an attempted suicide. I got put on antidepressants. 

-I got better. I let people take care of me. I let people in. I found out how amazing and wonderful some people can really be. How much their love, not romantic love, has the power to save you.

-I learned to let go of who is not healthy and not worth my emotional energy.

-I learned that everyone's life is good and bad at times. I learned that hardship and sadness is not failure. I learned that success does not equal happiness. 

2015:

-I am learning to stop hating myself. To love myself even though I cannot reach my vision of perfection. To believe that I am worth this life that I am living.

-I am learning to always give. To love hard. But also take. I am learning how to be brave enough to take up more space. 

-I am strong and I have goals. I have a future. I have friends and the best family. 

Since I'm studying abroad in London next semester for a good 4.5 months, I plan on 1) being a good student and 2) being a good tourist. The most of my extravagant traveling shall be done during my 3 week spring break, but the rest is just going to be some (2 or 3) weekend trips in UK. 

So here goes:

1) Spain: Granada, Barcelona, Madrid, Seville

2) France: Paris

3) Italy: Florence, Hike the Cinque Terre, See the Valley of the Temples, Colosseum

4) Ireland: music seshs in the pubs

5) Rome: ART (ceiling of chapel, pantheon)

6) UK: London, Edinburgh, Bath

Realistically I won't be able to go to all of these, and each of these countries/cities deserve their own spring break for adequate exploration and enjoyment...I know I won't enjoy it if I go see like 10 countries in 15 days. Most likely I'll just choose two or three cities to go to during the time. (Prague is already going to be a week since I'll be going with my honors class) 

SUB LIST OF LONDON EXPLORATION:

ART/MUSEUMS:

Stand through a performance at Royal Opera House

Shakespeare's Globe

Museum of London

Saatchi Gallery

Charles Dickens Museum

In South Kensington: Science Museum, Natural History Museum, V&A

Handel House Museum

Hunterian/Horniman Museum

Trafalgar Square for public art

Wellcome Collection (art/science)

SHOPPING:

Camden Market

Shop at Primark

Brick Lane Market

Brunswick Center

Wimbleton (high-end vintage)

ARCHITECTURE/SIGHTS:

Kenwood House

Tower of London (oldest tower since 1000)

Stonehedge

Buckingham Palace (changing of the guards in May)

Greenwich

Regent's Canal

House of Parliament

London Wetland Centre

South Bank

FOOD: 

 Eat pie in the Pie Room at the Newman Arms (23 Rathbone Street, W1)  Eat “Pie & Mash” at M. Manze’s (Tower Bridge Road) www.manze.co.uk  St. John (St. John St. near Smithfield Market) temple to new-Brit cooking  Bar Shu (28 Frith Street) for the best of Sichuan Food  Roast (at the Floral Hall, Borough Market) – dedicated to British food.  Do Dim Sum at Hakkasan, 8 Hanway Place W1  Indian street food at Imli 167-169 Wardour Street  Incredible Indian Food at the Painted Heron 12 Cheyne Walk  Best curry in London? Shampan on Brick Lane  The Table (83 Southwark Street) http://www.thetablecafe.com/aboutus.html  Dip in to the Hummus Bros.  Order London’s best tapas at Barrfina (54 Frith Street)  Best fish and chips in London? The Golden Hind on Marylebone Lane – with Spotted Dick or Bread and Butter pudding for afters too!  Go to Bodeans (Poland Street) for the best pulled-pork sandwich this side of Tennessee.  El Vergel - London’s only Chilean café – 8 Lanty Street, Borough  Greasy spoon at Kray Twins favourite – E Pellicci, 332 Bethnal Green Road, E2  Have dinner at the dogs www.lovethedogs.co.uk/wimbledon  Tom’s Kitchen www.tomskitchen.co.uk brasserie off King’s Road.  Order fish at J Sheekey – best fish restaurant in town: great place for lunch.  Discover Burmese food at Mandalay, 444 Edgware Road www.mandalayway.com  The Grandfather of Gastro-Pubs: The Eagle, 159 Farringdon Road, Clerkenwell.  Arbutus 63 Frith Street (www.arbutusrestaurant.co.uk) for the best set menu prices around  Best deal in town? Patogh (Persian food) in Crawford Place.  Fabulous lobster &/or burgers at Burger and Lobster www.burgerandlobster.com in Soho.

 Hunt down the mobile Choc Star van (www.chocstar.co.uk)  Coffee, Cake and Kink (61 Endell Street, WC2)  Fancy a Snog? – trendy frozen yoghurt in Soho  Late Night/Early Morning Bagel at Beigel Bake in Brick Lane  Candid Arts Café (Candid Arts Centre, 3 Torrens Street, EC1)

 Munch a macaroon at Laudree  Take afternoon tea at the Hoxton Pony www.thehoxtonpony.com

MISC/CHILL:

British Library

London Zoo

Ronnie Scott's (jazz bar)

Jazz Cafe (Hiphop LOL)

Mass

Notting Hill Arts Club (a club.)