#letterforme

Dear future me, I write this letter to tell you that you worked hard and everything will be okay. Thank you for being you, I love you.

Banyak surat yang pernah kutulis untuk orang lain, teman dekat terutama. Tapi sepertinya aku belum pernah menulis untuk diri sendiri kecuali curhatan di buku diary. Jadi hari ini, selagi aku masih berada di usia seperempat abad, sebelum 25 berganti ke 26, aku…

Dear Lord, when they said , Im just hurting a bit they are not really knews me well. When its actually hurt so much . Im not the one who are literally cried in the public , infront of family member and friends but when its happened. there is nothing i can said and just cried. 

Dear Lord , thank you for making me stay until now and keep me breathing on your beautiful creation world . 

Dear Lord ,thank you for being always with me but only me always forgetten you 

Dear Lord , please protect me from heartbroken. When it was broken into the pieces like a broken glass i dont know how to fix it andmaking it on shape perfectly again .

Dear Lord, May all my application will be answer soon because i cant barely stand here anymore. Most of the time when im back home there will be unhappy things happen. Home is always be Home but sometimes Home doesnt being so good to you . 

Dear Lord , please taking care my mom , family and friends . I love you them so much . 

Dear Lord , please make me more stronger then before . Please make me stop crying and make me forget what i should not remember . If i can bang my head to the wall and that will made me lose my memory. I will .  

-Cristhian

Dear Cristhian,

Dear Mrs. Whomever you are now.... I’m writing to you as your twenty year old self. I would like to start with a couple apologies. I’m sorry for smoking too many cigarettes, drinking all the Dr. Pepper I can get my hands on, and biting my finger nails even when I’m not nervous. But hell, you’re probably still doing all of those things. But I hope you’re not. I hope that you kicked all of those bad habits years ago. Lets say I’m writing to 40 year old me. That’s my life time X 2. I hope you’ve learned to take better care of yourself by now. I hope you have a couple little mini you’s and mini whoever I married. I hope you have a job you don’t dread going to. I hope that you get to go on vacation every summer, and maybe even every Christmas break, I hope you have time to read lots of books.  In case you don’t get those things, and you’re actually not very happy (God forbid) we will say that these are my selfish years. These are the years that I only have to worry about myself. These are the years that my biggest worry is how I’m going to do on my final, and if I have enough money to go to that concert thats about to sell out.  Because while I’ll believe that happiness is a choice, I will acknowledge that it’s not a guarantee. In which case,  my mission is currently to use as much happiness as I can in my twenties.  So, don’t be mad at me. Don’t be mad at me if you’re too broke to buy that new purse you wanted because you didn’t save enough money before you had little Emerson. Don’t be mad at me for not going to church this morning, I was too comfy to get out of bed. Don’t be mad at me for doing whats best for me. Because you have the rest of your life to do whats best for others. 

17 March 2014. Kamusta naman ang 17 March 2015 mo? Well kung tatanungin mo ako, ito bored. Bored sa dami ng ginagawa pero wala pa naman talagang natatapos. So tatanungin kita, ikaw ba dyan gusto mo ba yang ginagawa mo? Baka wala ka naman pinagbabago isang taon na mula ng isula ko to.

Actually, may nagawa at natapos ka na man talaga. Short time goal mo nga lang yun.. ang sama ko diba? Para tawaging LANG ang mga pangarap mo. Para tawaging LANG ang mga bagay na nagawa mo, at para tawaging LANG ang mga pinagmamalaki mo. SORRY naman. #sorrynotsorry 

Nandito ako ngayon sa stage na kailangan ko ng panindigan ang mga drawing kong ideya noon. Two years kamo diba? O ayan magdadalawang taon na ako, siguro naman alam ko na. Excited na nga ako sa AKO dyan eh. Nagpapakatino ako ngayon nagiipon, nag-aaral, nagpapayat, kinakapalan ang mukha, nagprprisinta, gumagala with friends, nagbabawas din ng surplus friends-kuno, nagdadag ng real friends, ginagamit ang wifi ng kapitbahay, nagpapalate bukas sa work, magiingay bukas sa work, hindi magOT bukas sa work, maiinis sa specific-isolated-case-na-officemate, pero hindi papansinin si specific-isolated-case-na-officemate, kakain ng tinapay at higit sa lahat, snusulong ko ang world peace.

O ano ba ang masasabi mo sa akin dyan ngayon? May direksyon pa rin naman akong pinaplano, lahat ng ginagawa ko ngayon e para sa ikabubuti mo dyan. Sana matupd na yung dinadasal ko. Para you're living the life we have both been dreaming of a long long long time ago! Haha

Influenced by a very good friend of mine, (check her out here http://www.findingperfectioninmypride.tumblr.com , she’s awesome!!! \m/) i actually asked her to share a story for my book review because i am such a lazy ass and reading is not my thing but i find joy in writing isn’t that ironic?(hell yea i’m like that) lol and so i choose, Perks of Being a Wallflower, as she was sharing it to me i was like i wanna know the full details so i watched the movie instead of reading (of course). In the movie Charlie said “i want to be a writer but i don’t know what to write about” and Patrick and Sam was trying to say “write about us”.

As a trending topic on twitter “#IWishICould” and obviously can’t express what i’m feeling for 160 characters or less, i suppose i can share my thoughts here.

Bla bla bla i talk a lot but what i just really want to say anyway is that #IWishICould read a write up which speaks about who i really am, how weird i can get and the feeling other people got when they’re with me. I just wanna have someone who would also want to write for me. To say what they think about me, how crazy i am, how moody i can get, how annoying my laugh is, the mannerism i don’t even notice, how distorted i look when i’m mad, shocked, happy, disappointed or simply doing nothing and all the flaws and mistakes i have commited but i want to feel that despite all of these, they still want me in their life.