Apr 13
Once again I am met with the brutal reminder that most people sleep on Mucho
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Once again I am met with the brutal reminder that most people sleep on Mucho
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I'm literally considering abandoning my current crochet project altogether. I am so annoyed. I frogged about 2.5 rows of my work about 2 days ago, because of one mistake, that turned out to not be mistake at all but because the stitches are so small the stitch I thought I missed wasn't actually missed but got covered by the stitch above it so I had to frog even further so that it would look the way it was meant to.
But the rest of the stitches were gorgeous and now I'm trying to recreate the rest of the stitches but having trouble doing so because I was improvising on the pattern as I went to what looked good/better because I made the pattern myself but the pattern is not perfect so it's trial and error because I couldn't predict how certain things would look crocheted depending on the yarn with crochet hook size etcetera. So I'm figuring it out as I go.
Anyway I'm like one step away from burning the project, because some of the stitches that were gorgeous before I'm having trouble recreating because I'm not sure what I did before which meant frogging was a risk. And I didn't take a picture of my work that I wanted to recreate before frogging because I couldn't find my phone and was too lazy to look for it and now we're here. And I've frogged the same part of my work like 5 times now and even my yarn is done with me because it's splitting where it wasn't before. What is my life.
But the project is so pretty and specific so if I don't make it no one will and I certainly won't own it and I really want to own it. The project is worth the time and effort it takes to make it. I just need to keep reminding myself of that.
reminiscence of the moments i became homeless and idiotically undermined and betrayed by selfish narcissists
i’d forgotten about it all
fruitless endeavor
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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defense against all self-doubt, the obliteration of all distress
just made creamy pasta sauce thing with leek and it tasted saurrr good then I added the ravioli and it tastes like ass urgh
It’s so funny how when I head into burnout my brain goes “you need to drastically change your life.” Because I’m more sluggish, finding it hard to do what was usually easy, tired to no end, that somehow means I’m not trying hard enough. So obviously to remedy this I have to start a new workout routine, start learning a new language (asap) and start offering to do unpaid internships. When really my body giving up and my mind preferring dreams over reality are clear cut signs that I’ve pushed myself too far and need to slow down.
I don’t know how many times I have to go through the burnout cycle to realise I’m not immune.