#left knee

As I’ve been writing about here and there on this site, I’ve been in consistent, extreme pain for over two months. I’ve been trying to access pain management medication while awaiting various appointments and have been continually denied.

Talking to my therapist about my upcoming appointment with pain management, she had me explain to her what I have been saying to providers so she could get an idea of why they may be reacting the way they are.

She suggested telling them what I told her, and ADDING how the pain has been impacting my quality of life.

I’ve been assuming that explaining the nature, severity, and frequency of pain would/should be enough for providers to be able to see how it would be hard to concentrate, communicate, move, and basically exist. But she said that giving them real examples of how the pain is preventing me from participating in life and the impacts on my functioning and mental health can give them more concrete reasoning for WHY I would benefit from medication. She said that proving I’m participating in the healing process by showing up for appointments, taking the medications that I have been prescribed to no avail, and actively advocating for things that I need to move things forward other than medication may help them to see that I’m not just trying to magically make the pain disappear, but instead trying to increase my quality of life in the meantime.

So I’m preparing a list of examples and I’m gonna be looking for ways I haven’t thought of yet that I’m being impacted to add them to the list between now and my appointment in a week.

Day 1

Original photo

Anatomy For Sculptors • "Left knee"

Anatomy Books For Artists. Website: anatomy4sculptors.com

artstation facebook sketchfab anatomy4sculptors youtube pinterest instagram

original photo

Meniscus tear, high-grade MCL tear, and the cartilage between my kneecap and my femur is gone.

My PCP has blown me off for seven weeks, telling me there’s nothing she can do for my pain, not even a referral, until after the MRI, and telling me it was probably just a bad sprain, telling me to just deal with it because a lot of other people have it worse.

Original photo

May 21, I injured my left knee. I slid and it popped twice before I fell, bracing myself with my hands so the impact didn’t fall on either of my knees. I have had documented right knee issues for nearly ten years.

Almost two weeks after the initial injury, I finally got to speak with my new PCP. She basically said, “take it easy for a month, and then call me and let me know if the swelling has gone down. Use the crutches, but gradually try to put weight on the leg because we lose the muscles in our legs really fast if we don’t use them enough. Give me a call in a month.”

As if I had her direct extension. As if it doesn’t require a scheduled appointment to place an order for anything within the VA healthcare system. As if I can just sit around, occasionally walking a short distance, for a full month. As if I can bathe myself without assistance having less than half my typical range of motion in a major joint in my body. As if I can spend the entire day alone, reaching and cooking and managing the physical demands that come with living as an adult.

Today I got a call to schedule my MRI. It’s July 13. The only available days were weekends, unless I wanted to come in at either 6 or 7 in the morning. It’s an hour and a half from me to get to this facility.

If she had just ordered it the first time we spoke, I could have scheduled it for a month out, so the swelling would have time to go down, and reschedule if needed for a later date. But now it’ll be almost 2 months after injury. That we’re getting a good look at whatever is causing this severe instability. Before I can even think about moving forward.

Original photo