J for Left Atrium?
J - Alternate Ending
TW for somewhat graphic depiction of death
I’m sticking this under a read more because it’s long and hopefully so nothing is spoiled. This alternate ending starts after Izzy’s birthday. You can read the original story here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17559593/
Iszabella’s hair smelled of lavender and honey. Her lips were soft with chapstick, and they tasted like sugary cotton candy when Gilbert kissed her. Her breath was minty and her skin was still damp from after her shower. Gilbert playfully traced hearts on her stomach, light enough to tickle and make her laugh. She grabbed a fistful of hair and pulled him close, her knuckles resting against the nape of his neck, so she could kiss him again.
—-
Gilbert kept his arm wrapped tightly around Iszabella, his hand cupping her side. She had woke up feverish and dizzy, whimpering that she felt like she was burning. Her cheeks were flushed and there was a sheen of sweat on her upper lip. It was the middle of the night, and she begged him not to go and bother the nurses or get anyone and make them worry. She said this would go away after a good night’s sleep and she would be fine. He’d gone to get a wet towel to cool her down, but she refused to let him leave her side, so he helped her up and brought her with him to the bathroom, where he sat her down on the edge of the bathtub and rinsed a washcloth with cold water. She held it against her forehead, gripping tightly onto him with her other arm. As they walked back, Gilbert carefully lifted her up and carried her the last few feet back to the bed. He laid her down and sat next to her, so she could put her head in his lap. Iszabella closed her eyes and Gilbert ran his fingers through her hair until her breathing slowed and she was asleep.
—-
The doctors quickly found out about Iszabella’s condition and she was moved to intensive care. It was an even drearier unit than the cardiac one, and when Gilbert visited her, he had to sit behind a glass panel, because he could catch whatever she had, or he could spread bacteria and make her sicker. When they weren’t together, talking for hours and hours to pass the time, they were texting, or skyping, so Gilbert always felt like Iszabella was with him.
—-
Iszabella: Come here
Iszabella: I need u
Gilbert: I’m on my way
—-
The nurse on duty was asleep, an open book of sudoku puzzles laying under her cheek. Every time she snored the pages fluttered slightly. Gilbert tiptoed past her, glancing nervously around, waiting for someone to pop out of one of the rooms. He crossed the corridor and opened Iszabella’s door as quietly as he could. The glass panel had a door, too, and Gilbert pulled a paperclip out of his pocket so he could pick the lock. Iszabella was partially sitting up in bed, pillows propping up her back and her head. She had a weary remnant of a smile on her face as she watched Gilbert struggle with the paperclip, then do a silent victory dance once the lock popped open. He slipped inside, and sat down on the side of Iszabella’s bed.
“You came,” she mumured, voice weak and strained.
“Of course.”
She smiled a little more and weakly shifted her hand so it sat on top of his. Gilbert understood the message and carefully pushed back wires and tubes so he could lay next to Iszabella. She was cold now, colder than she usually was. Gilbert traced his finger over her lips, tinted blue, and he gave her a quick kiss. He felt a sinking, twisting ache in his stomach when he looked into her eyes, glassy and unable to focus. She blinked for too long, had to put unimaginable amounts of effort into even just shifting her gaze. Gilbert sniffled and puckered his lips, trying not to cry.
“It’s okay,” Iszabella whispered.
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“It’s okay. I knew…” Iszabella closed her eyes and tilted her head to lay against his chest. Gilbert cradled her body, all of a sudden so much more fragile than he remembered. She didn’t smell like herself anymore, and her pink nail polish had nearly completely chipped away. Gilbert hiccuped and tasted salt. “You’re here. I just need you here.”
Gilbert shook his head, all of a sudden thinking of her parents who had been so kind to him and her friend, Tolys, who cared so much about her. They’d known her for her entire life. They should have been there instead of him, her high-school aged boyfriend who she probably would have broken up with after a few months and never thought of again if they had been in the real world.
“Gil?”
Iszabella’s voice brought him back to where he was. “I’m here, baby. I’m here,” he whispered, voice breaking with every word. He kissed her temples and rubbed her back. Her shoulders were shaking with the effort each breath took.
“Thank you- thank you so much.”
Gilbert shook his head. He couldn’t speak, for fear he would choke on his own sobs. His fingers trembled when he stroked her hair and cheek. Tears gathered below Iszabella’s closed eyes and it wasn’t long before her breathing slowed down again, as she resigned herself to her fate. Gilbert kissed the top of her head and held her tightly, wondering if she could feel that. He prayed she wasn’t in any pain.
When he couldn’t feel her breathing anymore and he couldn’t feel any warmth left in her cheeks, Gilbert felt like he couldn’t move. He laid there, still holding Iszabella, looking down at her heart-shaped face and the blunt ends of her hair and the freckles on the bridge of her nose. He found the words he’d been unable to say before, and they came out in an aching, awful sob: “I love you.”
Author’s note:
So I let this ask sit in my box for awhile because it was so hard to figure out what I wanted to do with it. I knew whoever sent this probably wanted something where Gilbert didn’t die and got his happy ending with Izzy, but I feel like even if they both lived, that would never have happened. They started dating mostly due to the circumstances. Iszabella was cut off from the rest of the world because she had to live in the hospital, and the only connection her age was Tolys, who she felt no attraction to. Gilbert was lonely and likely very scared because his life had been very normal up until getting sick, and he was suddenly placed in a new environment. The only other person in his age group who he could relate to was Iszabella, and I think what helped them bond was that they became each others’s escapes from reality. I feel like if Gilbert were not to have died and his condition to have been stabilized, he would have returned to his high school life and eventually not have had the time for Iszabella. Plus, he would have trouble pulling her into his life, because she is reintegrating herself into normal society. I also think the age difference would have made things awkward, because Gilbert is a junior in high school, and by now, Iszabella would be looking at college. They are at completely different stages in life and wouldn’t work in a relationship. I think they would stay friends, though, and have a special place in each others’s hearts.
