Autistic meltdowns are not a behavior.
Autistic meltdowns are a feeling that causes a behavior.
Temper tantrums are a behavior.
Temper tantrums are a behavior that is caused by a feeling.
They can look very much alike.
I bet a lot of people see this and think I look like a 2 year old screeching because mommy won’t buy me the cool toy I saw in a store.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xd3C4wrUfHk (Video recorded and uploaded by me.)
I am almost 37 years old. I’m not having a temper tantrum, I’m autistic and having a meltdown due to sensory overload.
I fell apart because a neighbor’s vacuum made a noise that hurt my ears even with my windows shut. You can tell the sensory overload is already intense by my distress stimming (pacing, hip-slapping that left bruises!) because I had a door right next to me and didn’t think to leave through it. The door was shut, my brain treated it like a wall.
I felt trapped. The feelings of fear and rage built up until the explosion where I start screaming, jumping and flailing. I lost all control of my emotions and my reaction to them.
It’s a quick meltdown; I call it explosive because it’s immediate and sometimes violent. You see the aftermath of the adrenaline surge when I show my hands shaking at the end.
Autistic meltdowns are not a behavior.
Autistic meltdowns are a feeling that causes a behavior.
Temper tantrums are a behavior.
Temper tantrums are a behavior that is caused by a feeling.
They can look very much alike. They are not the same thing. Sometimes the only way to distinguish the two is knowing if someone is autistic, their demeanor when angry vs in a meltdown, and the situation they’re in.
I throw temper tantrums too, though it’s rare. You can tell when I’m acting in anger vs a meltdown because I can still respond verbally to what you say. In a meltdown, I may stick to a word or phrase and say only that to you no matter how I want to respond.
Calling a meltdown a “tantrum” is dismissing, invalidating and insulting.