#ldik

Aelin woke up feeling so incredibly warm. Warmer and safer than she had felt in months. In fact, she felt better than she had maybe ever. As she rose to consciousness, Aelin noticed a few things. One, there was a weight banded around her middle that was making her feel as if she was wrapped in a cocoon. Two, there were tiny puffs of air hitting the back of her neck. And three, if the hardness that pressed against her backside was any indication, there was currently a man spooning her. 

As she became more aware, the night before came rushing back to her. Going down to the kitchens for some ice cream. Rowan begging her to listen to him and her, for once, actually acquiescing. Finding out about her parents. Rowan comforting her and making her feel better about the whole thing. Which all lead to this situation where Rowan was currently spooning her.

She couldn’t say she minded one bit.

Deftly, she tried to roll over so she was facing him. Surprisingly, Rowan did not wake from her maneuvering. She took the opportunity to just observe him. She already knew he was quite handsome but it was taken to a whole new level when his features were relaxed. The worry lines that usually appeared on his forehead were gone, his eyes gently closed so she could see the long, light eyelashes that adorned his face. Gently, she traced a finger down his straight nose, over his silvery eyebrows, across the apples of his cheeks. She brought her fingers over his pillowy lips, wondering what it would be like to actually kiss him. And she wasn’t thinking about the cheek kisses or the hand kisses he’d given her a hundred times now, but rather what it would be like to actually kiss him. 

She supposed she’d find out next week. 

The touch to his lips caused Rowan to awaken, sharply inhaling and tightening his arms to press her closer to him. She’d have to tease him about this later. Because Rowan Whitethorn, her stoic prince of Doranelle, was a cuddler. And if she was being honest, she loved it. Though his defined muscles should’ve indicated otherwise, the body wrapped around hers was soft and comforting. She guessed that this probably had more to do with the person rather than the body itself. Because somewhere over the last few months, Rowan Whitethorn had become her safe space. Her person. She had started coming to that realization before but to actually be able to acknowledge it felt completely different. It felt…wonderful.

“Mornin’, Fireheart.” Gods. His rough, sleepy voice was something else entirely. 

“Mmm, good morning, Buzzard.” She couldn’t help the smile that crossed her face as he let out a halfhearted scoff at the nickname. 

Rowan pressed a kiss to her forehead, bringing her in tighter. Here she was, thinking that once he woke up, he’d push her away or stop holding her. She’d never been happier to be wrong. 

“Did you sleep well?” Rowan asked as he started stroking her wild nest of hair out of her face.

“Mmhm.” That was an understatement. “Did you?” 

“That was probably the best sleep I’ve gotten in a while.” 

Aelin gave a sound of agreement. “We should probably get up soon.”

“Hmm, just a few more minutes. You’re warm and frankly, I have no desire to leave this bed.”

“Wait wait wait. Are you telling me that you, Rowan Whitethorn, are suggesting that we shirk our duties to lounge in bed?”

“I guess so. Why are you so surprised by that?”

“Because normally I’m the one who has to be pulled out of bed and held at swordpoint to get up. Lysandra hates me in the morning.” 

Rowan just laughed, his beautiful voice music to her ears. Once the melodious sound died down, a comfortable silence settled between them. 

“Are you really surprised that I don’t want to leave this bed?” A small look of nervousness took over Rowan’s face. “After everything that happened the past few days, I’d be happy to lay here with you for a few weeks. Plus, you’re an excellent cuddle partner.” As if demonstrating that fact, Rowan’s arms banded tightly around her middle.

“Wow. Now that I know you’re just using me for my cuddling capabilities, I’m not sure I can go through with the wedding next week.”

Rowan pinched her side. “Don’t even joke about that.” Though, as he said it, there was mirth dancing in his eyes. 

“I would never.” Seriousness overtook Aelin’s features. “On a serious note, thank you, Rowan. For being here. For being my friend. For marrying me. I know it’s not the most ideal situation but I’m– I’m glad that it’s you who I’m marrying.” 

Rowan’s eyes softened. “Anything for you, Fireheart. For what it’s worth, I’m happy that I’m marrying you, too. We’re in this together.”

The seriousness in Rowan’s eyes should’ve made her nervous. Should’ve caused her to run away at breakneck speed. But instead, it drew her closer to him, made her want to bare every inch of her soul and her body to him. Rowan inched his head closer to hers and Aelin thought he was about to kiss her. Finally. But before they could go any farther, a loud knock on the door broke them out of their reverie. Aelin jerked back, rolling onto her back and letting out a frustrated groan. 

“Aelin, are you decent?” Lysandra. She should’ve known her friend would come to check on her as soon as she woke up. 

Knowing that her friend had a penchant for barging in, Aelin shouted back, “Don’t come in!” Shit, well now Lysandra was going to think something was up. And if she found a half naked Rowan in bed with her…well… “I’ll just meet you in the dining room in a few minutes!” 

Aelin swore as she heard her friend’s footsteps walking away. She turned to Rowan but he was already rolling out of bed. She sat up slightly, resting on her elbows.

“I guess lounging in bed all day isn’t an option anymore. Sorry.”

 He turned to look at her, smiling slightly. “It’s alright. I’m pretty hungry anyway. I think we slept later than usual.” He pulled his shirt over his head, making his way around to her side of the bed. “I’ll see you downstairs, yeah?” Aelin nodded back. 

Rowan bent down over her head again, his nose almost touching hers. Maybe now she’d get that kiss. But at the last second, he swerved his head to plant a gentle kiss on her cheek. As he pulled away, a smirk made its way over his face, indicating that he knew exactly what he was doing. But instead of giving her what she wanted, he walked to the door and gave her one last, lingering look before walking out of her room. 

Aelin flopped back onto her bed with a frustrated yell. Her ears might’ve been deceiving her but she could’ve sworn she heard Rowan’s familiar chuckle as he made his way down the hallway.

- - - - -

“So, are you going to tell me what that was?”

“What what was?” Aelin played dumb to her best friend’s questions. 

“Oh, you know, just the rampant sexual tension between you and the Prince. Not to mention the eye-fucking you two were doing across the table.”

“We were not eye-fucking.” Lysandra came a non-committal hum. “We talked last night. Things are good between us now. That’s all.”

“Right. So you’re saying that your quick denial for me to come into your room this morning wasn’t because you spent the night with your fiance?” 

Aelin sputtered, the tea that she was drinking splattering down her shirt. “Damnit.”

A feline smile crossed her friend’s face. “That’s what I thought. So how was it? Did he live up to your fantasy romance books?”

“It wasn’t…We didn’t…I–” Aelin blew out a puff of air. “It wasn’t like that, okay? We talked in the kitchens last night and he walked me to my room and he stayed. That’s it.” Aelin remembered back to her friend’s untimely interruption this morning. “It could have been more but someone had to knock loudly on the door and break us up.” 

“Ha! I knew it! Aedion owes me fifty dollars.”

“Since when are you and my cousin friendly?”

“Oh my dear, dear Aelin. You’ve been so wrapped up with your loverboy that you haven’t even noticed that I haven’t been sleeping in my own room for the past week now?”

It wasn’t often that people surprised Aelin. But her best friend just did. “What?!”

Lysandra just laughed. “It’s still new. But yeah, I made a move since he obviously wasn’t going to and here we are. We’re seeing where things go but…It’s fun, it’s exciting. Your cousin is  putting me in such good moods in the morning.”

“Ok, eww. First of all, please don’t tell me anything else about my cousin, thanks. And second of all, I have been sort of out of commission the past week.” 

“Oh yeah.” Lysandra managed to look a little sheepish. “Well, I at least won’t tell you how many times he made me–” Aelin quickly slapped a hand over her friend’s mouth. 

“Not. Another. Word.” Lysandra just licked her hand in retaliation. Aelin was about to pounce on the woman but was interrupted by a familiar male voice.

“Ladies…” Rowan was standing in the doorway, smirking. And of course, her cousin was standing right next to him, looking a bit pale. The sight made Aelin smile with a vindictive glee. 

Aelin quickly dropped her hand away from Lysandra’s face and put on her most innocent face. “What can I do for you boys?” Rowan gave her a look that said he wasn’t buying her nice girl act. But she sent back her sweetest smile and a few bats of her eyelashes. 

With an exasperated sigh, Rowan sat down next to her. “We have some news from Doranelle.” That made Aelin drop all pretenses of humor. She was waiting for what Rowan would say next with bated breath. “Lorcan did it. He gave the evidence to my uncle and Sellene.” The pause after Rowan finished talking was way too long for Aelin’s liking. 

“AND?!”

A small smile graced Rowan’s lips. “And Maeve was ousted. The parliament themselves took her off the throne but there was no question on what would happen once the story broke to the news. The people were basically rioting in the streets, calling for Sellene to take the throne.” By the end of his statements, Rowan, though serious, was beaming at her.  Not caring who else was in the room, Aelin grabbed his hand. 

“She’s gone?” She whispered.

“She’s gone, Fireheart. You don’t have to worry about her anymore. In fact, Lorcan made sure that she wouldn’t be getting out of prison for a very long, long time.”

Aelin felt as though she could cry. Though they had no evidence against her for Aelin’s accident, she knew in her heart that Maeve had something to do with it. Just like she had a lot to do with her parents’ accident. A strange sort of peace settled over Aelin, enveloping her in an air of calm. It was a relief to know that there was one fewer person out there that could harm her. 

“Lorcan is on his way back here now. He wants to deliver the news to you and the lords personally. Lorcan isn’t a sentimental guy but he is big on duty. And he wants to be the one to break the news, to give you some semblance of closure.”

“You know what I think?” Lysandra asked as she met eyes with Aelin. A slow, feline smile spread over her features. “I think this calls for a celebration.”

Aelin returned the smile. 

“Once the hulking brute gets back, we can even invite him since Elide can’t seem to keep her eyes off of him when he’s around.” Rowan seemed to pale at that. “Think of it like a celebration of the witch being locked up forever and also a pseudo bachelor and bachelorette party for you both since we never got to do anything normal before your wedding. Just the six of us.”

Knowing that her friend always had some entertaining tricks up her sleeve, Aelin agreed enthusiastically. This was going to be fun.

- - - - -

A few nights later, Aelin was free from her duties. Just like Rowan said, Lorcan came to meet with the lords and herself and delivered the news personally. She took too much glee in inviting the man to a pool party on palace grounds, his stoic features never wavering yet it was as if he was irritated to be invited. She wasn’t sure what Elide saw in the man but a brief mention of him had Elide’s cheeks staining pink. 

And that’s how she found herself in her closet with Lysandra, trying to choose a swimsuit to wear. She always threw on whatever she felt like wearing. But this night was different. She wasn’t sure why, but she wanted the most spectacular suit possible. 

Ok, maybe she did know why but she sure as hell wasn’t going to voice that reason in front of her friend. 

Lysandra waved yet another suit in front of her face, making her try it on for her.  Lysandra insisted she was just looking out for Aelin but Aelin also knew that “looking out for her” also meant finding a suit that made Rowan want to drop dead. 

Which was how she found herself in a skimpy gold bikini. It definitely was not her normal choice for swimwear but she couldn’t deny that it made her boobs look fantastic. And she wasn’t usually one for cheeky bottoms but… yeah….this would work. It wasn’t like she was actively trying to seduce Rowan but since his little tease the other morning, she had to get back at him somehow. 

Lysandra whistled as Aelin exited the bathroom, spinning in her suit and see-through coverup she was wearing. 

“Oh, loverboy is going to have a very…hard night.” Aelin’s eyes widened as she smacked her friend's arm. 

“Stop it!”

“I’m just trying to get you two to stop beating around the bush and fuck already, okay? I think it would make things easier for all of us.”

Aelin rolled her eyes. “Let’s just go.” The girls made their way down to the pool, where everyone was already settled into seats or floating around the warm water. That was the benefit of having a heated pool: even though it was still chilly April in Terrasen, swimming was an option. And thus, Lysandra planned a pool party just to make Aelin squirm.

“Finally! It’s about time you two showed up.” Her cousin threw an arm around her shoulders, his breath smelling like whiskey already.

“How much have you had to drink already, cousin?”

“Oh, just a few. Would’ve been less if you had gotten here sooner. We were taking shots for every minute you two were late.”

“Gods. You’re lucky you don’t have alcohol poisoning. You know I’m always fashionably late.”

“Don’t worry, Dad was watching over all of us.” 

“Dad?” Aelin raised an eyebrow. 

“Yeah, Lorcy, Ellie and I have started calling Rowan dad since he’s a killjoy that doesn’t want to make bad decisions with us.” Aelin snorted. 

“Ok we’ll circle back to the dad thing later but…Lorcy?” Aelin burst out laughing at the look on the man’s face. Lorcan looked as if he would rather be called anything other than Lorcy. Though there was a softness to his features when he looked to the woman sitting on his left, giggling as if it was the funniest thing in the world. Aelin had a theory that there would be one person he would let call him Lorcy. But she kept her mouth shut for Elide’s sake.

“Ok, now that the life of the party is here, what’s first? Body shots? Spin the bottle?” She would’ve kept going but she had come to the realization that Rowan was nowhere to be found. “Hey, where’s Rowan?”

“Right here.” The man in question came walking around the hedge lining the pool, two more bottles of alcohol in his hands. Without even looking her way, he said matter-of-factly, “These are only for–” Rowan stopped dead in his tracks as his eyes slowly made their way up her body. She could see his adam’s apple bob tightly, his breathing becoming sharper as his eyes landed on her golden bikini. She thought she heard Aedion mutter a few curses and a short ‘that’s my cousin bro,’ but she couldn’t be sure. Because if she was being quite honest, her eyes were on him, as well. 

It was as if it took all of his willpower to snap himself out of his reverie because with a few fast blinks and a shake of his head, he was continuing his sentence. Or trying to, at least. “I.” Another head shake. “This is for you. Not them. They had too much. Just you. And Lysandra. And. I’ll shut up.” Aelin bit her lip as a smirk crossed her face. Gods damn her but he was just so cute when flustered. And she was proud that her little plan worked.

She grabbed the bottles from him, giving him a smirk. “Thanks Dad.” Rowan groaned in response.

Lysandra chimed in from behind her, “I think you mean Daddy.” 

With a gasp, Aelin spun around to push her friend into the pool but Lysandra was too fast. Aelin stumbled and fell forward, waiting for the impact of the warm water to take her but it never came. Strong arms were banded around her waist, already hauling her back to the hard body behind her.  

“Careful there.” 

Aelin’s breathing hitched. Sure, she spent the night with the guy but she was never this close to him with so few clothes on. Through her thin coverup, she could feel the hard planes of his abs. She swallowed hard as she looked up to him. Breathlessly, she muttered, “thanks.” 

He just gave her a smirk in return, letting go of her though keeping her hand in his and making his way over to the drink station. 

“Here,” he handed her a drink. “I think you should probably have one if you’re ever going to tolerate Aedion tonight. He’s a bit of an…interesting drunk, isn’t he?” 

Aelin gratefully accepted the drink, a whiskey sour, and huffed a laugh. “That’s an understatement. Between you and me, Aedion’s a lightweight. He gets giggly, then loud, and finally he just gets unintelligible.” 

“He’s been calling me Dad since drink number two so there’s that.” 

On cue, Aedion shouted from the pool, “Papá! Aelin, wrestle us!” Indeed, Lysandra was perched on his shoulders, waiting for an opponent. 

Aelin burst out laughing. Aedion….he called Rowan Papá. Oh, she was never going to let him live this down. Judging by Rowan’s irritated face, he was not looking forward to her remarks, either. Though there was a lightness dancing in his eyes that she had only begun to see. 

Rowan offered her his hand. “Well? What do you say? You and I make a formidable team. Think we can take them?”

Aelin took his offered hand. “Oh, I know we can.” 

A few minutes or hours later, Aelin couldn’t tell, she was gloriously buzzed. Not completely drunk, but enough to feel light and giggly. After the wrestling came the truth or dare, which turned into a game of just dare since Aelin stayed away from any truthful questions. While she felt great, her ribs were starting to ache. She thought she was doing a fairly good job of hiding it until she caught Rowan frowning at her. 

Damnit. The man could read her like a book. 

As he made his way over, she tried to school her features into a placid, neutral look. To her surprise, he didn’t say anything about her ribs or mother-hen her. Instead, he offered his hand once again, inviting her to the hot tub that was set apart from the pool where their friends still floated. 

“Fireheart, will you join me?” 

She hoped she didn’t look too eager as she took his hand but she couldn’t deny she’d been trying to get a moment alone with him all night. They hadn’t really even gotten to talk without their friends inputting an opinion or two. So this little venture to the nice, private, secluded hot tub felt like a dream. 

They both eased their way into the scalding water, the ache in her ribs soothing instantly. Aelin let out a sigh of relief and rested her head on the side. Distantly, she heard Rowan chuckle. 

“What’s so funny, Buzzard?”

He gave a small eye roll, though it held no animosity. “I knew you didn’t feel quite right. You got quiet all of a sudden. Is it your ribs?”

Aelin just gave a grunt of affirmation. 

“You should’ve told someone. You can take a break every once in a while, you know?” 

“I know. This is just the only night that we all get to be ourselves. We’re not royalty, we don’t have a kingdom to run, no wedding to plan. Just a fun night with our friends. And I didn’t want to ruin that.” 

“I don’t think anyone would’ve thought that. They’re just happy you’re okay and able to be with them.” Rowan paused. “I am happy that you’re okay and with me.”

Aelin opened her eyes and met Rowan’s sparkling green ones. They both gave each other a soft smile and when Rowan reached his hand out to touch her arm, she allowed him to pull her closer to him. Rowan gently wrapped his arm around her shoulders, her head taking its place on his shoulder. She couldn’t help but feel that this was where she was meant to be. This spot was made for her and her alone. She just wondered if he felt the same. 

“Did you have fun tonight, Fireheart?” Rowan’s voice was achingly gentle, his lips brushing her hair with loving ease. 

She smiled at the gesture. “I did. Did you?”

“I mean, apart from Aedion calling me Dad every five minutes, yes. Yes I did.” 

The moment was so serene, Aelin could’ve fallen asleep. “What was your favorite part?”

Rowan didn’t answer for a while. “If I’m being honest. Right now. Right here is the best moment.”

The sincerity in his voice made Aelin turn her head to look up at him. The want that she felt so strongly was reflected in his eyes, sparkling with every undulation of the water around them. Aelin turned her body more fully to him and she felt his hand trail down her arm to her waist. She was practically on his lap at this point. 

In her buzzed and comfortable state, her sense of self preservation was clearly not working. Which is what she told herself as she threw her leg over his, straddling him. His other hand came up to her waist, just gently holding her there but the intensity in his gaze was something else entirely. 

As they drifted closer, Aelin couldn’t help but think that every moment they’d been through led to this. She didn’t just want to kiss Rowan, she needed it like she needed air to breathe. Aelin concentration was zeroed in on every place they were touching. The roughness of his swim trunks against the insides of her bare legs. The circles his thumbs were making on her sides, the way that they dug in slightly to the fleshy part of her stomach. His nose, which was ever so slightly touching her own, the coldness startling against the rising steam of the hot tub. 

Aelin never wanted this moment to end. They were sitting on the precipice of something new. Something beautiful. And all she had to do to jump over that ledge was lean forward an inch, bringing her lips to his and sealing her fate. 

Just as she was about to do that, lips already brushing a featherlight pressure against his, a commotion broke through the hedges. Startled, Aelin pushed herself off of him, drifting quickly to the other side of the hot tub. 

And it was just in time for Aedion to burst through, slipping loudly into the hot tub with them, seemingly oblivious to what he just walked into. Aelin rested her head back against the lip of the tub again, trying to calm her racing heart. She assumed Rowan was doing the same if the awkward quietness was anything to go by. 

And Aedion sat there, unaware that he broke up what could’ve been the best moment of her life. She knew it wasn’t fair to be angry at her cousin but she couldn’t help but feel a little resentment toward him. And of course, he hadn’t stopped talking since he entered the tub with them, having already reached the unintelligible stage of drunkenness. Usually, Aelin would find it funny. But not tonight.

“Aedion, please, please be quiet. I’m begging you.” Aelin rubbed her eyebrow, a headache forming already.

When she couldn’t even understand a word of his reply, she knew it was time to get him to bed. Shouldn’t this have been Lysandra’s job? The woman in question was nowhere to be seen, however, so for now it would be left to Aelin. 

“Alright, buddy,” Aelin slapped Aedion’s shoulder. “Let’s get you to bed.”

Rowan graciously helped her to get him out of the hot tub, tugging Aedion’s arm around his shoulder. “I got him, Fireheart.” He gave her a soft smile. “Go and get some rest.” 

“Are you sure?” 

It was that moment that Aedion chose to say something more, the only clear word being “Dad.”

With an exasperated eye roll, Rowan nodded. “Yeah, rest up. I’ll see you tomorrow at the rehearsal?” 

Aelin nodded. She did nothing more than give him a soft smile as he turned away. “Good night, Rowan.”

“Good night, Fireheart. Sweet Dreams.” 

As she made her way up to her room, there were two questions on her mind. First and foremost, would she ever be able to actually get that kiss from Rowan? And how was she going to sleep when her heart was alight with a fire she thought burned out long ago?

A/N: Oh, Aedion. You and Lysandra are two peas in a pod. Sorry for the long wait. For some reason I just could not get into writing this chapter. Next one is the big one and there's only two left and then the epilogue!

Aelin was miserable. It had been a day since the revelation. That, at least, is what she had taken to calling Rowan’s betrayal. She had left him sitting by the door and hadn’t left her room since.

 On the morning after she kicked Rowan out of her room, Lysandra came to check on her. Or would have come to check on her if she wasn’t stopped by someone in the hall. She couldn’t make out anything as Lysandra was talking to whoever was out there very quietly. She had a good sense of who was still probably sitting on the floor in front of her door. But there was no yelling, no berating. Just soft whispers. It made her anxious. What if she was wrong? She hadn’t even let Rowan explain. But what was there to explain when she had heard him confirm what he knew? Aelin tried to quell the rising anger that was building in her chest. She wished she was well enough to go for a run, to kickbox, anything to allow her to channel the pent up rage she was feeling. But her ribs were still bruised and her head still sore. 

Lysandra announced her presence simply by quietly closing the door and locking it. She sat on Aelin’s bed, enveloping her in her arms. Aelin buried her face in her friend’s shoulder, appreciating the comfort Lysandra offered, her friend’s hand making soothing circles on her back. When they pulled away, Aelin realized that her own cheeks were wet. She hadn’t even realized she had been crying, though it didn’t really surprise her given the events of the past 48 hours. She had so many emotions swirling around her head that it was difficult to pin down even one of them.

Lysandra brushed her sweaty hair from her head. “Girl, you need a shower.” 

At that, Aelin burst out laughing. “Probably true. But at least I have an excuse.”

“How are you feeling by the way?”

“Like I got hit by a train or two.” Aelin contemplated telling her friend the truth. That the bruised ribs and headache were nothing compared to the ache in her heart. “But not physically hit by a train. More like…emotionally.”

“Ah yes, the silver haired elephant in the room.” 

Aelin huffed in annoyance. 

“For what it’s worth, I probably would’ve reacted the same way. Except I would’ve used my teeth to rip out his throat instead of words.” Aelin gave her an incredulous look but Lysandra chose that moment to get serious. “I think you should talk to him, Aelin. Not because I think he’s right or wrong, that’s not my decision to make, it’s yours. But you should talk to him because what you two have is worth more than one possibly misconstrued conversation. I don’t know what you think you heard. I don’t know what he said. But from a third party, I’m telling you that he hasn’t left your door in the past day and hadn’t left your side for a day before that. The way he acted when you were missing were not the actions of someone who wanted or intentionally tried to betray you.”

Lysandra’s words should have made her angry. Should have made her want to kick Rowan’s face in. And yet, she just felt deflated. “And what if I talk to him and I can’t forgive him?”

“Then that’s a bridge you cross when you come to it. But you both owe it to each other to at least talk about it. He owes you an explanation and maybe you owe it to him to listen to it.” 

“And if I want another few days of wallowing in self pity?”

“Then I’ll bring up a bunch of greasy, unhealthy snacks and we can have a movie day. No boys allowed.” 

Aelin snorted. “I don’t deserve you.” 

“Yes you do. I’ll always be here for you, Aelin. No matter what. Always remember that.”

“I think I’ll take you up on the offer of a movie day. I might fall asleep but I’ll get my recommended dose of best friend cuddles.” Aelin smiled genuinely at her friend, perhaps the first one in a day. Her heart felt lighter knowing that she had someone in her corner. Yet that someone wasn’t trying to push her like Aedion would. Or force her into doing something like Darrow and the lords. Here, she could just be Aelin for a day.  - - - - -

Aelin was awoken that night by her stomach growling. When was the last time she ate? She couldn’t even answer that question. Lysandra had brought a bunch of snacks up for their movie day where they watched as many stupid, sappy, romance movies as they could. Despite there being snacks, Aelin wasn’t sure that she really took advantage of that fact. She sure as hell wasn’t hungry, her heart still too tender to really enjoy any of the things she usually did. 

The clock on her nightstand read “11:49.” Perfect. It was time for her midnight ice cream snack. No one was around to tell her she couldn’t partake in her once nightly tradition, Lysandra having gone back to her room at some point in the nighttime. 

She hadn’t been down to the kitchens for a midnight snack for a month. Now that she thought of it, the last time was when Rowan had found her and apologized and–. No, she wouldn’t go there. She wasn’t thinking of him. She would only think of the vat of hazelnut ice cream that was awaiting her in the freezer. 

Her shuffling steps were the only sound as the wooden planks of the hallway became the stone tile of the kitchen. As she opened the kitchen door, her sixth sense radiated a warning that she was not alone. And though she knew there was someone in there with her, she knew she wasn’t in danger. Because her sixth sense also happened to be a Rowan sense. And sure enough, there he was, sitting on her windowsill, looking through her window. 

A flash of anger rippled through her. She didn’t want to see him. Not now, maybe not ever. The audacity he had to steal her secret spot. 

She was about to turn to flee when she heard him call her name. 

“Aelin.” His voice sounded as wrecked as she felt. “Please. Please let me explain.” She paused at the pleading in his voice. His voice was barely above a whisper and she had never heard him sound so…fragile. It was all she could do to tightly close her eyes, willing away the rising tears that were threatening to spill over. 

“Please just talk to me.” His voice sounded a little closer so she turned around slowly. He had stood from his perch on the window, not moving closer but still reaching out to her as if he couldn’t help himself. “If you still don’t want to see me after, I’ll respect that. But please.” 

She swallowed hard as she took in his words and as she remembered back to Lysandra’s. She didn’t want to admit it, but her friend might have been right. She owed it to him to listen to an explanation but he also owed it to her to be truthful. And neither of those things would happen if she didn’t give him a chance.

“Okay,” she whispered. 

She made her way to the window seat but her steps were slow as her ribs started to ache again. From the corner of her eye, she could see Rowan watching her like a hawk and even thought he might have tried to step toward her a few times as she slowly took steps toward the seat. But she ignored the help he tried to give and made it there on her own, just as she always had. 

They both sat in silence for a minute, neither knowing what to say. 

“I’m not sure where to start. What…what did you hear yesterday?”

“I already told you what I heard yesterday.” Aelin snapped. “I want you to start from the beginning. The truth. No more lies.”

“I never lied to you.” Aelin scoffed at his words. “I know you don’t believe me, but I didn’t.” Aelin stayed silent as Rowan wrung his hands, his nervousness showing for the first time since she’d met him. 

“You already know how I came to be in Terrasen. Maeve basically ordered that I had to enter into a marriage contract with Terrasen’s future queen. I knew about you, of course. But I didn’t really know you. There was nothing I could do except do her bidding. While I may never take the throne of Doranelle, I’m still a prince. And that means that I have to do whatever she says.” From his tone, Aelin knew he did not hold his queen in high regard. She had already known but she wasn’t sure that she ever heard him speak about Maeve with such venom. 

“She was…too eager for me to come here. I can’t remember a time when she was excited to do dealings with another kingdom. Maybe excited isn’t a good word. But she pushed me to leave as soon as possible and was very adamant that I was to do whatever I could to charm you.” 

Aelin snorted. “Yeah, because we got off to the best start.” 

Rowan remained serious. “I started wondering why she was acting like that at that point but brushed it off, thinking she just wanted Doranelle to have an ally. I came here and haven’t heard a word from Maeve since. She didn’t call, didn’t text, and didn’t inform me of anything.” Rowan paused. “But then I started to care for you and we got closer. And I learned about how your parents died and I had some…suspicions. Accidents happen all the time in Doranelle. We were always told it was because those people deserved it, because they had done something wrong. And I’m ashamed to say that I hadn’t questioned it all that much. But your parent’s accident made warning bells go off in my head for some reason. I had no proof and couldn’t back up any claim so I stayed silent. You had enough on your plate so I kept my mouth shut.”

“You don’t think I should’ve known about this?!”

“Aelin, I didn’t want to worry you over something that might not have even been true. I thought maybe I was making it up in my mind, seeing something that wasn’t there. We were already on rocky ground with each other, how would you really have reacted if I told you that I think my queen had something to do with your parent’s death yet had no evidence to back that up?”

Aelin thought for a moment. She probably wouldn’t have believed him, to be honest. Would’ve thought that he was trying to rock the already wavering boat that Terrasen and Doranelle stood on. She gave a small nod for him to continue.

“And then you were taken. I know I said this yesterday but I was going out of my mind. I couldn’t even think straight until I found you safe and sound. And even then, I was more worried about keeping you safe and helping you recover than the implications of what happened. But I did have enough insight to call Lorcan in. He was already around the area anyway and he owed me a favor. So I explained the situation and he looked into everything.”

Rowan’s breathing started to get shaky again. “I wasn’t kidding yesterday when I said he’s the best of the best. He is. He could track a bird across the country if you needed him to. I just wanted him to look into your accident. I didn’t say a word about Maeve or your parents or anything. But while he was digging, he uncovered these things on his own.” 

“What things?” Aelin could feel anxiety rising in her gut. 

Rowan paused and she allowed him to gently take her hands. “Lorcan didn’t find any connection to Maeve and your accident. She either was really good at covering up her tracks or she had nothing to do with it. But he did find evidence that pointed to her hiring the person who killed your parents and uncle. I’m sorry, Aelin.” 

The silence was overwhelming. There was a ringing in Aelin’s head. Maeve….had her parents killed. Was still possibly trying to kill her, though there was no evidence. The sobs started slowly, gently, and then picked up when her emotions got to be too much. She felt Rowan’s warm arms embracing her and pulling her into his lap gently, so not as to hurt her bruised ribs. 

She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that. Rowan gently rocked her while her sobs turned to small whimpers. He was running a soothing hand over her back and had her scooped into his chest in a comforting cocoon. She could feel his own tears dripping into her hair. 

Eventually, she stopped crying enough to look up at him. “I’m sorry.” She buried her face into the crook of his neck. “I’m so, so sorry, Rowan.” 

“You have nothing to be sorry about, Fireheart.” 

“I didn’t even let you explain last night and I was so horrible to you.” 

“It’s already forgiven. Not that there’s anything to forgive. I’m sorry that you had to find out the way you did. I wanted to tell you but I wanted to let you rest and recover first. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” It was Rowan’s turn to bury his face into her hair, pressing firm kisses to the top of her head. “I never want to hurt you. Ever.”

 From her position in his arms, she twisted so she could wrap her arms around his neck tightly. He returned the hug in earnest, making her feel safe with such a simple gesture.

After a while, they returned to their positions on the window seat, though not going far enough to create any measurable space. He continued to gently hold her hands, rubbing his thumbs over the backs of them. Aelin couldn’t help but wonder, “What now?”

“Well, Lorcan went back to Doranelle this morning. He’s presenting the evidence to my uncle Ellys and my cousin Sellene, who is next in line for the throne. If it all goes according to plan, Maeve will be ousted and we won’t have to worry about that threat anymore. She’ll get what’s coming to her, I promise you, Fireheart.”

A small smile crossed her face at the mention of the nickname. She whispered back, “Fireheart.”

Rowan squeezed her hands, curious. 

“How did you come up with that nickname for me?”

“I’m not sure. I just think fireheart is the best way to describe you. You’re fierce and wild and unyielding like flames.” A smile crossed Rowan’s face. “But you have the biggest heart of anyone I know and you would burn everything for those you love. Fire heart.” Rowan’s brows furrowed. “Do you not want me to call you that? I can–”

She cut him off with a kiss to the cheek and offered a small smile. “No, I like it. I just haven’t heard that nickname in a while. My parents used to call me that.” 

He once again brought her hands to his lips, placing gentle pecks on the backs of them. “Well then, Fireheart, let’s get you the ice cream that I’m sure you came down here for and then get you back to bed, yeah?” 

Aelin chuckled, happy that they were once again back to an easy camaraderie .

Rowan did exactly as he said he would. He brought her the container of Hazelnut ice cream, both of them sharing it until they felt as if they were going to puke. Which for Rowan was not much since he had a particular distaste for sweets. They settled into a companionable silence, both sharing a few shy glances and smiles toward one another. Aelin couldn’t pinpoint what, exactly, had changed. But something had. Their relationship felt stronger, more sturdy. More…full.

Afterward, Rowan walked her back to her room like the gentleman he was. She could tell he hesitated, not wanting to leave her alone. She told herself it was for his own well being that she did what happened next. She grabbed his hand, “Stay with me tonight.” 

“Aelin–”

“No. No Aelin’s. I’m calling in the favor you owe me from winning our sparring match the other day. Stay with me. Just for tonight.” And before he could protest more, she added a whispered, “Please.”

Rowan gave in rather easily for all his earlier jests of preserving her virtue. She gently pulled him into her room, divesting herself of her robe and slippers before burrowing under the heavy covers. Rowan did the same on the opposite side, choosing to wear only his soft trousers to bed. Aelin tried not to stare at his muscled chest as he raised the covers but it was a bit difficult. She told herself it was simply because she was ice cream drunk and tired. But that lie fell flat, even to herself.

Rowan turned toward her and brushed a few strands of hair out of her face. His hand slithered down to her arm and grabbed her hand, pulling her slightly closer to him. 

“Goodnight, Fireheart.”

“Goodnight, Buzzard.” 

She was sure the picture of Rowan smiling as he closed his eyes would be gracing her dreams for nights to come.

A/N: See, that angst didn't last too long! It wouldn't have at least if I had gotten this chapter out earlier and not 3 weeks later oops. We only have 3 more chapters and then an epilogue, that's it! Hope you guys are enjoying! As always let me know if you want to be added/removed from the tag list :)

The days following the almost-wedding ceremony had been a whirlwind of activity. Since she was now officially set to take the throne, the Lords turned to her for more matters than ever, asking for her opinion on small things like colors of tablecloths for the coronation to the bigger things like moving funding to a specific charity. To say Aelin was overwhelmed would have been an understatement.

On top of it all, Arobynn’s trial had been scheduled for just a few days following the attack. She had never been put into a position to dole out punishment like this before and it certainly wasn’t something she enjoyed doing, even if the turdish ex-lord deserved it. 

Aedion, Lysandra, and Elide were by her side through it all. Aedion, her trusty advisor and protector, just as he’d always been. Lysandra, the voice of reason that came with a surprisingly sharp tongue. And Elide, sweet Elide, who on the surface looked like a quiet, gentle ruler, yet was the most cunning and ruthless of them all. The four of them together made up what would be her main court, her most trusted advisors. There was just one thing missing. Or one person. 

The days following the ceremony, Aelin hadn’t seen Rowan since he slipped out amongst the chaotic aftermath of Arobynn’s arrest. She didn’t know what to make of it. She thought that she was worth more to him than cheaply fleeing. She didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye to him after their departure. And when she made her way to his room two days later, they were sparse. When Aelin questioned the maid cleaning the room, she simply replied that the Prince had left for Doranelle. 

Maybe it was better this way, she thought. Maybe it would hurt less if they didn’t linger. Maybe she wouldn’t be prompted to blurt something that she probably shouldn’t.

But all those maybes didn’t make her feel any better. Missing Rowan was like missing a limb. Her realization that she loved him came at the most inopportune time, directly before she called off their wedding and he fled. She was proud of herself for being selfless and putting him first. He could marry who he wanted, he could move where he wanted. He could be free. He was no longer shackled to her.

That didn’t make the fire that was eating away at her insides hurt any less when she thought of Rowan going back to his lover in Doranelle. While she was trying to be a selfless person, she could still admit that she was wholly jealous. The feeling was unwelcome, burning her stomach and occupying space in her thoughts that she didn’t have room for. Her focus needed to be on her kingdom, on a peaceful transition of power, not on puppy love that lasted a few short months. 

Who was she kidding? What she felt for Rowan was more than puppy love. 

She tried to put on a brave face, smiling when she needed to and laughing when she knew something should’ve been funny. Yet she knew that Lysandra and Elide could see right through her facade. She knew her smiles didn’t reach her eyes, her laughs hollow. None of the warmth that Rowan brought into her life was there anymore. 

Time. It would just take time. That’s what she told herself. She was in love with the man, for the Gods’ sakes. She wasn’t expecting to snap out of that in a few days. 

It was the Thursday after the wedding debacle when she finally had a chance to breathe. She felt stuck in a never ending circle of council meetings and the lords ambushing her to butter her up so she would be on their side of whatever debate they were trying to win. To be alone and breathing in the cool air on the balcony attached to her room was an absolute gift. Here she could just be Aelin. She could breathe without feeling the pressure of the crown and she could bask in the beauty of Terrasen. 

Down time, however, also meant room for an idle mind. And her idle mind always led to thoughts of him. As she watched the sky turn from blue to golden-streaked hues of pink, Aelin wondered what Rowan was doing. Was he looking out of his window watching the night sky? Were his thoughts turning to her just as hers always were of him? Out of all the things she hoped for, she hoped most of all that he was happy. 

She started humming a tune, one that she couldn’t place the name of but was sure her mother used to sing to her when she was a child. The song was slow and meaningful, yet held an undertone of melancholy. How fitting. She allowed her humming to take over through memory alone, a slight sway to her body carrying her away from time and space, the wind brushing past her skin, her dance partner. The melody was a mournful ode to a lost lover. A lost almost lover. A goodbye. 

As the final notes left her lips, Aelin sighed, taking in the quickly darkening sky, as a single tear rolled down her cheek. 

“Fireheart.” Her nickname was murmured so low, she almost didn’t hear it. But what a beautiful sound it was. 

With a sharp intake of breath, she turned around slowly, eyebrows raised to her hairline and eyes wide, not understanding why he was there. How? The setting sun illuminated half of his face in brilliant purples and pinks. She thought he had never looked so beautiful. 

“Fireheart,” he repeated lowly. She swore his voice cracked, emotion hoarse in his throat. 

Swallowing thickly, she forced herself to reply. “Rowan?” Her voice was little more than a breath of air. “What are you doing here?” 

“I’m here to see you.” A non-answer. 

“What…Why…I—” She paused to gather her thoughts, breathing deeply. “I thought you went back to Doranelle?”

“I did,” he replied as he began stalking his way toward her. Step by step, he came closer and her breath got shallower and shallower. Could he be- no. She would not get her hopes up. Of course he was just here to say goodbye, to collect his things. Not to confess his undying love for her. 

She tried to school her voice so it contained less emotion than the bursts of it she was feeling inside her chest. “Then why are you here? If you forgot something, we surely could’ve just shipped it to you or something. And your horse, I know that we could have secured passage for him.” Aelin knew she was rambling but she couldn’t help her racing thoughts.

“Aelin, breathe.” His hands came up to cup her cheeks now that he was right in front of her. “I did go back to Doranelle. But I went back just to get my affairs in order.” He paused and took a deep breath. “Because somewhere in the last few months, Terrasen has become my home. Its future Queen is one of the most selfless and amazing people I’ve ever met. And if she’ll have me, I would like to move here and serve her in any way that I can. It would be an honor to be a part of this court.” He paused before adding, “The court that will change the world.” His brilliant smile illuminated the dying light of the sunset. 

Aelin felt tears starting to swell in her eyes. He was truly here to stay?

“But what about your family? And Lyria?” She looked away from him, shaking her head, fearing his answer to her next statement. “You deserve to be with the woman you love.” 

Rowan leaned his head toward hers, keeping his gentle yet steadfast touch on her face, and bringing his forehead to meet hers. It felt like ages until he spoke again. “I am right where I want to be, where I need to be. With my best friend, my Queen, the other half of my soul. I’m already with the woman I love. You, Fireheart. I love you.” 

Aelin couldn’t help the sob that escaped her at his words. His beautiful, beautiful words. The ones that she swore she waited her whole life to hear- just from him. 

It seemed like Rowan was getting good at wiping the tears off of her face. She didn’t think she’d ever cried in front of anyone as much as she had with Rowan the past few months. Yet every time that she felt like she was falling apart, he was there with those damn thumbs to put her back together, one wiped tear at a time. 

When she was all out of tears, she slowly turned her face up to his. He was so, so beautiful. So beautiful and perfect that it took her breath away. But she needed her breath to say what she wanted to say next. 

“I love you, too.” 

The smile that crossed Rowan’s face at her words, well, she didn’t think she had ever seen anything as dazzling or flawless. She felt his smile, not only against her forehead as he placed a gentle kiss between her brows, but inside, in her soul. It was as if a puzzle piece had been fitted into a part of her heart she didn’t even know was missing. 

She felt the more sturdy press of his hands against her cheeks and the back of her neck, tilting her head towards his. She knew what was coming next yet she wasn’t sure that anything could have prepared her for the elation she felt when Rowan’s lips touched her own. As her heart was beating rapidly, her face heating, and butterflies erupting throughout her entire body, the only word that made its way to her mind was finally. 

Kissing Rowan felt like coming home. And after weeks of almost-kisses and interruptions, she finally was able to experience it in all its beautiful and mind-numbing glory. The peck she gave him after calling off the wedding was nothing compared to feeling the soft press of his lips against hers, feeling the heat of his body through their clothing like this, his tongue sweeping across her own. She couldn’t even think further about how it would feel to have him inside her, their bodies and souls melding as one, for fear of her entire body combusting.   

Their breathing was heavy when they finally pulled away; seconds, minutes, hours later. Aelin couldn’t be sure of the time just as she couldn’t be sure she wasn’t dreaming. Because everything she was experiencing was right out of one of her beloved romance novels. 

“Does that mean I can stay?” Rowan broke the silence with a hushed murmur. 

Aelin lightly smacked his arm, knowing he was joking but finding it not funny all the same. “Of course you can stay, you dumb buzzard.” He chuckled.

“I missed you.” Rowan’s voice took on a serious tone. “I know we were only apart for a few days but I missed you like crazy. It killed me to not say goodbye to you. I hoped I hadn’t ruined everything. But with everything else going on, it was easier to just slip away quietly, hoping you didn’t even notice I was gone.”

“I noticed,” Aelin admitted. “I noticed right away. How could I not? The man I loved fled after I called off our wedding. I thought that I had ruined everything. I don’t necessarily regret how things happened but I wish that I would have told you how I felt. I wish that I was just honest and maybe we should’ve just gotten married. It might have saved us both some angst.” She chuckled.

Rowan tipped her head up, shaking his own as their eyes intently met. “I disagree. I think everything happened exactly as it should have. You needed to be independent and fight for your throne without a man by your side. You deserved nothing less than to get what you were rightfully owed without having to marry someone. And I’m so, so proud of you.” Rowan pressed a chaste kiss to her lips. “If you had confessed, I’m not sure I would’ve made it back to Doranelle. And I needed to go back so that I could explain to my family what was going on, to say my goodbyes and tell them that there’s a better way to live than what we were doing in Doranelle. And I had to go back so that I could get this…” 

Rowan dropped her face, taking a step back and reaching into the pocket of his trousers. His hand was holding a small, nondescript box when he brought it back out. He took another step back while taking one of Aelin’s hands in his own.  She wasn’t sure she was breathing when he got down on one knee. Again.

“I know we’ve only truly known each other for four months but I feel like you are part of my soul, Aelin. And this doesn’t have to be a true engagement if you don’t want it to be, but maybe rather a promise. A promise that I will always be by your side, a promise to love you and support you in whatever you do. A promise that you are my Fireheart, and I am your Buzzard. And when you’re ready, when we’re both ready, we can talk about getting married.” He pulled his hand away so he could open the box. A beautiful green emerald stared back at her, not too large, yet enough to catch the light of the sunset just right. 

“I know you technically already have a ring but that one…I hated that one. I didn’t pick that out and it wasn’t truly from me. Darrow just gave it to me to give to you and that was it. I had no say in it and to be quite honest, I don’t think it was something that you liked either. I’m hoping that you’ll like this one better.” Rowan plucked it out of its cushion, slowly standing and taking her hand once more to place it on her finger.

He paused before sliding it on and Aelin realized belatedly that he was waiting for her assent. “Oh Gods, yes! Yes, Rowan. Whatever you’re offering, everything you’re offering, it’s a yes.” He breathed out a sigh she didn’t realize he was holding, slipping the beautiful ring onto her finger before she flung her arms around him. He picked her off the ground, holding her like his life depended on it and twirling her. She wasn’t sure that she’d ever been so happy. 

As he set her back on her feet, she admired her new jewelry. The weight, unlike the diamond from before, was a welcome feeling on her ring finger. And the band was truly beautiful, a gold to match the ring around her eyes. “It’s beautiful, Rowan.” 

He touched his forehead to hers once more. “I’m glad you like it. It…it was my mother’s, actually. I’ve kept it all these years because I just couldn’t part with it. And then I met a woman with fire in her soul who’s beauty rivaled the gem in this ring. And at some point, I realized that since my heart already belonged to you, so did this ring.” 

“Such a sappy Buzzard.” Aelin chuckled but her eyes were once again filling with tears. Rowan leaned down and kissed each one away, trailing a path down her cheek until his lips met hers once more. Aelin started chuckling against his lips as a thought popped into her head. “We’re going to have to have a very, very longggg engagement. Otherwise, Darrow might kill me if he has to plan another wedding after I called off the last one.” 

Rowan’s full belly laugh was music to her ears. She didn’t know how she got so lucky. After all she’d been through, there was finally someone that was her equal, her soulmate. She never used to like thinking about the future and what it might bring. There was too much death and pain in her past to think about a family or finding love. But she could have that, she realized. With Rowan, she could see herself having it all.

 Her thoughts drifted to their friends, gathered around for a (real) wedding ceremony; of taking a honeymoon to Antica, where she always wanted to go but never had the chance; to meeting Rowan’s family and getting to know the people who shaped her fiance into the man he was; to their future children with silver hair and turquoise eyes. Thoughts of the future didn’t scare her at that moment. Not if Rowan was with her to take on every battle that came their way. 

A finger on her chin brought her back to reality. “Hey, where did you go?”

Aelin smiled at him, her best friend; Her fiance once again. “Sorry. I was just thinking.”

“Do I get to know what my Fireheart was thinking about?” He raised his eyebrows playfully.

“Hmm…maybe I could be convinced to tell you…” 

Rowan pulled on her hand, leading her into her bedroom. “Well, then allow me to convince you, your Highness.” Aelin couldn’t help but smile back at him as they started their future together.

A/N: Well, here we are. It's technically the end though we have an epilogue after this to tie it all up. This has been my biggest project to date and while it's probably small compared to some of your monstrous fics, at 38k words, I'm pretty proud of how much love went into this. Fun fact: It all started with a single scene, the one that can be read above. I was listening to Love Story by TSwift and this image popped into my head of Aelin and Rowan on a balcony, confessing and proposing and crying and it was beautiful. So I hope that translated into the scene from this chapter. That one idea evolved into an entire Princess Diaries 2- based fic. Thanks for reading, my loves!

tagging:

Aelin Ashryver Galathynius was floating. Somewhere in her mind, she knew she wasn’t actually floating. But the feeling of being suspended on clouds, of the gentle movement, remained anyway. The clouds smelled like pine and snow, like her home. She heard hushed voices, whispering beneath the fluffy swirls. And then quiet. Nothing.

Nothing until the pain, that is. 

  The first thought that came to her as she drifted back from the perfect dreamscape was that she was in pain. Her head was pounding, her ribs creaking with every inhale she took. And all of that would’ve been fine if her eyes weren’t glued shut. In short, she felt like she got hit by a train. Or maybe ten trains. 

Eventually, her eyes unstuck from their cemented state and she was able to see. Except the light was too bright and it made her head pound harder. Looking away from the bright light, she was finally able to open them a sliver, acclimating herself to the room. 

She was in her bedroom, the soft sheets and pillows were those clouds. And there was a figure lounging in the chair next to her bed, their head resting near her arm, their hand holding hers. Silvery hair glinted in the sunlight and Aelin couldn’t help raising her free hand to stroke through the strands. They were soft as feathers and she got a whiff of pine and snow as her hand gently wove through the thick strands. But the scent didn’t bother her. Didn’t make her headache worse. No, instead it calmed her in her confused state. 

Which, speaking of, what was this man doing in her room? What was she doing in her room? It had to have been past noon and she would be missing her scheduled duties for the day. She braced her right hand to push herself up from the bed without disturbing the man next to her but as soon as she did so, a sharp pain shot through her ribs. A pained gasp escaped her, waking the figure sleeping by her side.

Wide, green eyes met her own. Rowan. Aelin’’s mouth dropped open and her brows furrowed, wondering what her fiance was doing at her bedside. She thought about the previous night. They went their separate ways after sparring and despite her promise to meet up with him, she obviously had missed breakfast that morning. 

Rowan’s hand tightened on her own. His words were barely a whisper as he breathed, “Fireheart.” Aelin’s eyes widened at the nickname. Fireheart. She hadn’t heard that in a long, long time. She was taken away from her thoughts on the nickname by the sight of tears running down Rowan’s cheeks. She felt tears welling in her own eyes as he buried his face in her arm. She could feel her breathing pick up, not remembering exactly why she was in this state but knowing that something bad had obviously happened.

Eventually, Rowan pulled away from her arm but still kept hold of her hand. He brought her hand to his lips and pressed a series of gentle kisses to the back of it, trying to get his emotions under control. Aelin herself started to sob but the pain in her ribs quickly quelled that need. Her face contorted in pain with the movement, Rowan getting up to hover over her. And then she chuckled lightly. 

When she opened her eyes, Rowan looked confused. “You’re such a mother hen.” Aelin cringed at the hoarseness of her voice, froggy from disuse. But she still gave him a smile, which he quickly returned. 

He seemed to relax after that, both of them staying quiet but not letting go of each other’s hands. Rowan’s thumb was tracing a pattern on the inside of her wrist, the movement both soothing and somehow intimate. 

“Aelin, I–”

She cut him off. “Wait. Just…I need to know what happened. Why do I feel like shit? Did I actually get run over by a train?” Rowan didn’t even crack a smile. She was attempting humor for his sake but the man remained stoic.

“We don’t know. You never showed up to breakfast so I got worried. And then none of us could find you so basically the whole palace was conducting a search. I–” He took a deep breath. In. And out. “I found you in the middle of the Oakwald. Kasida led me to you. You were…you were lying in a pool of blood by your head.” He barely choked the last words out. 

The entire thing came rushing back to her, somehow distracting her from the pounding in her head and making it worse at the same time. 

“I went for a ride last night after you left the gym. And it was fine at first. But then… I heard something and I remember….I remember pain on the back of my head, falling off of Kasida.” She paused, trying to gather her thoughts, brows furrowed. “There was a person there. But I don’t think I saw their face.” Rowan was tense beside her, completely at odds from the concerned, gentle look on his face. “I do remember seeing boots walking toward me. Brown. They looked like riding boots. I know that doesn’t help much but that’s all I remember.”

Rowan brushed a piece of hair from her forehead and gave her a tight smile. She wanted to get lost in the feeling of his hands weaving through the tangled knots but she also needed to get to the bottom of this.

“Did you-” Aelin took a deep breath. “Did you find anything else out about what happened?”

Rowan shook his head. “Unfortunately, not much. Aedion’s soldiers couldn’t really find too much out because they’re not skilled in tracking like that. So I actually called in a favor from a friend from Doranelle. His name is Lorcan and he’s a private investigator. He’s the best of the best. If anyone will be able to figure out what happened, it’s him. He’s already here and has already done more than any of us ever could. He said that he could see where you fell off of the horse and he could make out boot prints, though they were indiscernible because someone hastily covered them up.” Aelin was trying not to let her fears get the best of her. “Interestingly enough, it did look like Kasida was protecting you. There were signs of some struggle, indicating that your horse was trying to maul whoever was attacking you. So at the very least, we’ll keep an eye out for anyone with suspicious bruises.”

That, at least, made Aelin chuckle. “Remind me to give her endless treats when I see her next.”

“Oh, that’s already done. Your knight in shining armor of a horse actually led me to where you were.” Rowan chuckled and then sobered. “You’re very lucky to have her.” 

“I am.” Aelin averted her eyes, suddenly shy. “And…I’m very lucky to have you.”

Rowan looked startled for a moment, as if he never expected her to say something so bold, to come this close to talking about what they felt for each other. She squeezed his hand tightly, hoping to convey everything through that one touch.

“Aelin, I…” Rowan took a deep breath, gripping her hand tighter. “I was going out of my mind when we realized you were missing.” She could feel the tremor in his hand, knew without a doubt that he was still feeling the aftereffects of those few hours in which she was missing. “I don’t know how it happened but in these last few months, I’ve come to care about you a lot. Not just because of the betrothal but because you’re my friend. And I’m not sure what I’d do if something happened to you. I was ready to burn down the Oakwald if it meant hurting the person that did this to you.” 

She squeezed his hand again. “I’m here. I’m okay. Or, at least, I will be okay.” A small huff of breath left his lips. She gently placed her hand on his cheek, raising his face to look at her. “Thank you for finding me. I’m glad to have you here by my side.” 

He slowly raised her hand to his lips again, the softness lingering well after the gentle brush was over. It wasn’t the kiss she wanted. But it was a kiss she’d treasure nonetheless.

Deciding the conversation had gotten too serious for her tastes, Aelin tried to lighten the mood. “Why were you hunched over my bed when I woke up? This is a king bed, you know. You could’ve just laid down next to me.” A smirk crossed her face so that he knew she was teasing him. 

“How dare you insinuate that I’m anything but a gentleman. I would never stain your virtue in such a way.” A snort left Aelin’s lips at that. 

“Now you sound like the lords of Terrasen. My virtue.” Aelin cackled. It was music to her ears when Rowan started his full-belly laugh, true delight overtaking his features that were so stoic just moments ago. She could get used to this. Waking up next to him. Joking with him. Being happy. 

“You’re probably famished. You have been asleep for almost a whole day, after all.” At his words, Aelin’s stomach gave a loud grumble. When she looked back at Rowan, he was suppressing a laugh. “I’ll go find something. Any requests for Her Highness?”

Aelin rested back into the pillows. “Mmm. Chocolate hazelnut cake.” 

“How about regular food and then we’ll see about the cake, hmm?” Aelin crossed her arms and pouted, “You’re no fun.”

“I’ll be right back.” But before he left, Rowan bent down and placed a soft kiss to her forehead. He gave her a soft smile before exiting. Aelin wasn’t sure when her stomach was going to stop doing the flips it was currently doing. But she honestly hoped it would never stop. It was a novel feeling. The butterflies in her stomach made her giddy. She felt as if she could do anything as long as he was by her side, cheesy as it was. 

It was all Aelin could do to wait for him to come back with her food. She wasn’t feeling the greatest so she wasn’t sure that it was wise to get up and wander around. But after he hadn’t returned after an hour of waiting, she decided to take things into her own hands and go search for him. Her bones protested at the movement, though her head was feeling better than it did an hour ago. 

She reached the door to her bedroom and she thought she heard hushed whispers coming from the other side. Quietly, she eased the door open, slow enough that it wouldn’t be heard nor seen. She peeked her head out but didn’t see anyone in sight so she continued toward the small bend in the hallway. At the end, she stopped in her tracks, hearing Rowan’s voice talking quietly to another male. Whatever conversation they were having, it seemed like they didn’t want to be heard. Which was exactly why Aelin stayed where she was and strained her ears to the hushed conversation.

“You don’t look particularly surprised by this information,” the unknown voice accused.

“I’m not. I knew…I knew there was a possibility it was Maeve.” That was Rowan’s voice. What wasn’t he surprised about?

“You know what this means right? And you still want to do the bitch’s bidding?”

“I can’t exactly break the marriage contract. It’s already signed and sealed. The wedding’s in less than a month.” Aelin’s stomach dropped. The butterflies from earlier fled the scene, leaving only cold ice in their wake.

“Are you going to tell her?”

Rowan sighed. “No. Not right now. Not until we have more information, at least.”

Were they talking about her? He wasn’t going to tell her what? 

A clapping sound reverberated through the long hall, presumably Rowan’s shoulder meeting the other man’s hand. “She’s going to find out eventually. Not only does it involve her but also her parents, too.”

“No. She doesn’t need to know right now. I knew Maeve was involved somehow and now I know. She had Aelin’s parents murdered and now she’s coming for her.” “Are you telling me that you knew before you even came here?”

Rowan’s silence was answer enough. Aelin tried to keep the tears at bay until she got back to her room. But once she was in her bed, cold anger overtook her. She had been played. Rowan knew everything, it seemed. Knew that Maeve was involved in her parents’ deaths, in her own assassination attempt.  Knew that the Queen of Doranelle was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Yet he agreed to come here anyway, agreed to marry her even if it meant her death. 

She could feel her body shaking and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She didn’t even look up when the door creaked open. Didn’t look up when her fiance set a tray of food at her bedside. Didn’t make a sound when he asked if she was okay. 

“Aelin? You’re shivering.” He went to press a hand to her forehead but she jerked away at the last minute. “Aelin? Do you need me to call a doctor.”

“What I need…” And there were the tears. Shit. She swallowed thickly, though the tremors never ceased. “What I need is for you to leave.” 

He again went to reach for her hand, not getting farther than the bed. The murderous look in her eye kept him away. “I don’t understand.”

“I heard everything. You were talking to your friend. I heard it all. And I’d like you to leave now.” 

“Aelin- just let me explain, please. Please. Whatever you think you heard, I’m sure it’s not what you thought it was.” 

“I heard enough. I heard about my parents. About Maeve. About me. But most of all, I heard that you knew about all of it. And you chose not to tell me.” 

“Fireheart, that’s not–”

“Don’t call me that.” Aelin stood from the bed, slowly stalking toward him. “I said leave. Don’t make me call the guards.” At his hesitance, she placed a hand on his chest and shoved. Though the shove probably felt little more than a tap on his chest given her state. 

“Aelin, please.” With the last whispered please, she successfully pushed him out the door, closing and locking it as quickly as she could. She heard a thump sound from the other side, as if a head was leaning heavily on the door itself. She could hear his choked breath, could hear him sliding down the door until he reached the floor. And then she collapsed to the floor on her side, as well. She knew how ironic it was, that they were sitting back to back. Yet while his grief was from guilt, she thought bitterly, hers was from heartbreak. 

When she finally made her way back to her bed, she allowed herself to succumb to the grief that was eating away at her. For her parents. For her relationship. And for herself. The sobs wracked her body until sleep, blessed sleep, finally took her.

A/N: I'm so sorry. I wanted to make this super fluffy but then chapter 9 and 10 just rolled into one and it worked out. It was originally supposed to end when Rowan left. But the angst monster was out today, I guess. Don't worry though, I'm not an angst person so this will be solved in the next few chapters, lol

A few days had passed since the Independence Day Parade and the subsequent realizations that came after it. Aelin definitely had feelings for Rowan, that much she knew for sure. More than friendly feelings. Feelings that greatly outpaced anything she ever felt for Dorian, Chaol, or Sam, the only men she ever dated. 

He made it a habit to take his breakfasts and dinners with her every morning and evening. She had even found him waiting for her in the hallway by her rooms a few times. She thought it was incredibly sweet and definitely added to her budding feelings.

It was a few days after the damned magazine came out with the seven page spread of pictures of her and Rowan that she was cornered in her room by her best friends. Lysandra and Elide caught her unawares while she was taking a hot bubble bath, locking the door and holing themselves in the bathroom with her. They claimed that it was the only way they could get some privacy with her but she had a theory that this was the only way she couldn’t run away from the conversation.

Because that’s why they were there. They wanted to speak with her on her growing feelings for Rowan. And it’s not that she didn’t want to talk about them, she just didn’t know what to say. 

“Ok, now that I’m finally here and apparently missed so much the last few days, you need to fill me in.” Elide was practically bursting with excitement, having missed the entire parade when she traveled back to her home town of Perranth. 

Aelin just groaned and sunk further into the bubbles. “I don’t know what to tell you. We’re friends. That’s it.”

Lysandra scoffed. “That is not just it, and you know it. I told you the same thing the other day and I stand by it. I see the two of you together and you have never been like this with anyone else.”

“I mean, I’m marrying the man, for fucks sake! How do you want me to act? Like I hate him? Because let’s not go back down that road, please. It was not fun.”

Elide took her hand and gave her a knowing smile. Her friend always knew how to calm her down. And not many people could resist Elide’s dark brown puppy-dog eyes. “Ae, just start from the beginning. Pleassseee? For me?”

With a sigh, she did. She told them how they didn’t get off to the best start, about their fighting. And then she told them about their late night kitchen talk, of which neither Lysandra nor Elide knew about. Both of them were trying to contain their enthusiasm at the news. She filled them in on their ride up the mountain, about their later conversations. 

When she got to the part about the parade, Lysandra just happened to have the magazine from the morning after with her. Because she was always prepared. Elide was practically vibrating with excitement once she saw the pictures, not commenting for the longest time but rather just taking the pictures in. 

She slowly turned to Aelin, asking, “Aelin. I mean this in the most non-prying way possible. But…do you love him?”

Aelin sputtered. “Love him?!” That was ludicrous. How could she love a man she barely knew? She had strong feelings, sure. But love? “No, there’s no way.” Elide looked like she wanted to protest. But before she could, Aelin added,  “But I will admit that I have developed…more than friendly feelings towards him. Possibly.” 

Both Lysandra and Elide tried, and failed, to hide their glee. “Oh we know that. We can tell by these pictures.” Elide was having way too much fun with this. “But I think these pictures also tell another story, too. I hate these magazines. With a  passion. But I can’t deny that you, both of you, look super in love here.” 

“We had to play the part since we were in public. Rowan is really good at selling his charm despite not liking people all that much.”

“With all due respect, this is not the face of a man who is pretending. Especially not this particular gem,” Elide pointed to the picture of Rowan kissing her hand. “No, this is a man who is more than smitten. I’ve seen his smiles for the public and this is not one of them.”

Silence followed.

“Are you guys here to do anything other than pester me or can you let me get out of the bath so I don’t look like a prune? I have to get to the orphanage today.” 

Lysandra and Elide reluctantly got up from their spots on the tiled floor. “Just think about it, Aelin. We just want the best for you. And if you say to back off, we will. But I also know that you have a tendency to run when things get to this stage. I think you’d be throwing a good thing away if you did so.”

“Well, I can’t exactly run, can I? Since I’m in a contracted marriage. That’s probably all this is to him anyway. He’s doing his duty. That’s all.” 

“Maybe that’s something you should confirm with him.,” Elide said with a raised eyebrow. Aelin knew Elide meant well but she did know that Rowan was here in Terrasen because Queen Maeve ordered him to be. He left his family, his friends, his lover behind. He said as much on their ride up the mountain. Sure, maybe he didn’t blame her for his situation. But it sure as hell wasn’t going to make him love her any more easily. 

With a sigh, Aelin unstuck her pruney fingers from the tub and got ready for her day. 

- - - - -

Aelin got home late from the orphanage, meaning she missed dinner with Rowan. She hoped he wouldn’t be mad but something told her he would’ve encouraged her to stay and have the meal with the people at the orphanage, anyway. The only problem with not seeing him was that she was overthinking things. Lysandra and Elide’s conversation did not help to calm her nerves about the situation. She had hoped being in Rowan’s presence would help the anxiety but since she didn’t get to see him, here she was. Sitting in her room, trying to read a book but spectacularly failing. 

She decided that perhaps a nice kickboxing workout was in order. She dressed in her workout clothes and made her way down to the palace gym. It was blessedly empty, her cousin opting to have morning workouts instead of six at night. 

She started going through her warmup motions. Since there was no one else present, she was going to use the kickboxing bag today. She was trained since she was little in a few different martial arts forms, mostly for self defense. But kickboxing was her release. The high intensity of it calmed her mind and allowed her to get out any pent up energy. And tonight’s workout promised to be one where she put everything into those kicks and punches.

She was deep into her workout when a throat cleared behind her. She hadn’t even noticed anyone come into the room but there was a familiar head of silvery hair, leaning against one of the machines, smirking. 

“You ok there, princess?”

She let out a huff of breath. “Fine. Just couldn’t turn my mind off.” A thought came to her then. “How long have you been watching?” 

“Long enough. You know, you’re not so bad. You have great form and obviously have enough pent up anger to beat up these poor punching bags.” He patted one of them, followed by a chuckle.

“I’m not angry.” Rowan raised an eyebrow.  She let a sheepish smile show through. “Ok, maybe I’m always a little angry. But it just feels good to let it out here. The Gods know I can’t do it anywhere else. I always have to be the prim and proper princess.” She started unwrapping her hands. “Sorry I missed dinner, by the way. I got caught up with the orphanage and some of the kids asked me to stay. I can’t say no to them,” she smiled.

“No worries. I figured something of the sort happened.” He rubbed a hand on the back of his neck. “I was actually coming to find you and when you weren’t in the library, I just decided to wander around a little. And then I heard some pretty alarming noises coming from in here,” he smirked. “I thought someone might be getting murdered. But it turns out it was just you murdering the punching bags.”

She rolled her eyes but couldn’t help the small laugh that left her lips. “I was not murdering. Like you said, I have great form. I knew exactly where I wanted to punch and kick. It was a very controlled environment.”

“How about we make things interesting? Would you like a real partner to spar with?” It was Aelin’s turn to raise an eyebrow. Rowan’s eyes raked down the length of her body. “See how much control you have over your form?” Was he flirting with her? This was an entirely new side of Rowan that she hadn’t seen before. It gave her a little hope that what Lysandra and Elide had been prattling on about this morning was slightly true. 

“I’m trained in four different martial arts, a black belt in three of them. Plus I’ve been kickboxing since I was 10. This isn’t going to be easy for you,” she snarked. 

“Then prove it.” 

Aelin was never one to back down from a challenge. “You said to make it interesting. What do I get if I win?”

“Well, given that that’s not happening, when I win, let’s just say a favor of my choice.” Rowan sobered a little. “Nothing bad of course.” Ah, there he was. That sweet, sort of dorky Rowan that made her insides feel like mush. The other Rowan, though. He was making her insides feel like they were on fire.  

“Ok, ditto. When I win, favor of my choice.” “I honestly dread to hear what you might come up with.” 

“Are we going to talk all night or are we going to spar?”

Rowan’s eyes met hers and a smirk crossed his face. He reached behind his head to tug at his shirt. Right, of course. He wasn’t dressed for sparring. Perfectly natural that he’d have to take off his shirt. She was totally not going to get distracted.

She was totally distracted.

His abs were delicious. She knew he worked out before, could tell just by holding his arm. But feeling the muscles beneath his shirt and seeing them were two different things. Her mouth went dry at his tanned skin rippling as he finally got the shirt off. Godsdamnit. Either he was really horrible at undressing or he was doing it on purpose. She was inclined to think the latter given the way his body looked like a god. 

Never one to play the easy way, Aelin decided to even the field. She ripped her tank up and over her head, leaving her only in her dark green sports bra. The one that she knew made her boobs look fantastic. She smirked right back at the man who was now as still as a statue. She didn’t let him recover as she attacked first. He barely dodged the impending attack, only tumbling out of the way at the last minute.

“Huh, thought you’d be more graceful, Prince.”

“Are we going to talk or are we going to spar?”

He was flustered, she knew. 

They went back and forth for a while, both of them getting hits in but not enough to turn the tide of the battle they were currently engaged in. For every jab she threw at him, he deflected. And for every kick he offered in return, she spun out of the way before his foot could make contact. 

She must have been distracted by the sweat running down his pectorals because in a moment, he had her flipped on her back, straddling her thighs. They both were breathing heavily, tired out from their well-matched fight. But Aelin was nothing if not persistent.

“Didn’t think you’d give up that quickly,” Rowan taunted.

“I know when I’ve lost.” 

Rowan bent down slightly and Aelin angled her neck just so. She saw his eyes flick to her lips, her neck, just slightly lower. And she took her opening. She maneuvered one of her legs out from under his, wrapping it around his waist and pushing with all her might. A man caught unaware was quite the easy target despite his larger body size. She pinned his hands above his head, straddling his legs and pinching them tightly between hers.

“And good thing for me, I knew I hadn’t lost just yet.”

Rowan let out a huff of breath that seemed more than just a laugh. 

“Guess this means that I win. Favor to be determined.” Aelin just smirked and rolled off of him, laying right next to him.

They both caught their breaths for a moment, neither acknowledging the tension that was filling the room. If she was a bolder person, she would call in the favor right then and there. She knew exactly what she’d want it to be. And the favor would be to continue what he started before she flipped them over. But she wouldn’t do that to him, not with so much up in the air about where they stood in their marriage. 

Rowan slowly rolled up and gracefully got to his feet. He offered a hand, which she gratefully accepted. At the last moment, before she let go, he pulled her close enough to share breath. “This isn’t over, your highness.” Aelin just smirked in return and he gave her a devious smile. 

They both went their separate ways with a promise to meet for breakfast again the next morning. Aelin had to say that she was disappointed when he put his shirt back on to walk back to his room. She hated for him to go but loved to watch him leave. 

She had hoped that working out would help her mind to settle but after their little match, her mind was spinning faster than ever. She decided a quick ride on Kasida was in order. She had to sneak by the guards, which was incredibly easy. She wondered if she should have a talk with Aedion about that. 

Quickly, she saddled the beautiful Asterion horse up and rode off into the cool night. It was unseasonably warm for the usually long, bitter Terrasen winters and Aelin was taking advantage of that fact. Her mother always told her that she had fire in her blood. She knew she meant that more about her personality but she couldn’t help but get as much sun as she could whenever it was out. 

She was lost in thought as she traversed the easy path that veered into the Oakwald forest. She wasn’t planning on going far but she needed the crisp air to clear the raging storm in her head. The way Rowan was flirting with her tonight pointed to him more likely than not returning the feelings she held for him. Perhaps she should talk to him about it. Or maybe they could just keep going like they were tonight, flirting, sparring, and having the raging sexual tension build up until one day, it would hopefully just burst. 

A twig snapped behind her and she halted Kasida so she could get a better listen. It was most likely just a small rabbit or squirrel but she couldn’t be too careful, especially since she didn’t tell anyone where she was going. 

Another branch rustled off to her left, making her turn quickly towards the sound. Maybe this was a good place to turn around, she thought. Just as she was about to give the signal for Kasida to race back to the palace, something grabbed onto her left leg, pulling her from the saddle. Kasida reared up, almost trampling Aelin in the process. She took off at a breakneck speed, leaving Aelin laying in the dirt. 

But those twigs snapping didn’t stop and before she could figure out what was happening, blinding pain shot across the back of her head. The last thing she registered before she hit the ground were polished brown riding boots stalking toward her and a distant whinny from Kasida. And then everything went black.

A/N: You really thought this was just going to be a fluffy, spicy little chapter, didn't you? Next chapter, we'll get Rowan's POV because you know our bird boy will lose his mind.

Tagging: As always, lmk if you want to be added/removed!

The day of the wedding had arrived and Aelin was a bundle of nerves. It was unusual for her to be so affected by being in front of a crowd but this day was different. She was marrying Rowan, who she had come to realize just might be the love of her life. And it was that realization that put her in a new predicament. 

She hadn’t gotten to really talk to him about their almost-kisses. The rehearsal was so frantic and formal that they weren’t able to get a moment to themselves. Sure, she could’ve snuck out to his room but her anxiety over the next day held her back.

Could she really make Rowan marry her when he deserved so much more? He deserved to choose his fate, not be tied to an arranged marriage. She found out so much about him the past few months. How he was an amazing friend. How he was extremely competitive, but even moreso with her, it seemed. How gentle and kind and caring he was with the people around him. It was a stark contrast with how she felt about him when they had first met. If Aelin was being honest with herself, Rowan was probably one of the most selfless and incredible people she ever had the pleasure of knowing. She was lucky to have him.

She stood in front of the mirror, Lysandra putting the finishing touches on her wedding gown and hair. The dress was flowy and gauzy, looking as if it came straight from a fairytale. The off-the-shoulder sleeves hung low against her arms, creating a boho style that complimented her free-flowing locks of golden hair. Lysandra chose to do her makeup lightly, Aelin’s natural beauty enhanced by some golden touches here and there. And, of course, the final touches were her mother’s emerald earrings and matching tiara, her most prized pieces of jewelry. Emeralds represented Terrasen, not only because they were the colors of her country, but also because Queen Evalin adored them. She gifted this particular set on Aelin’s ninth birthday, just one year before her mother and father died.

“You look beautiful, Aelin,” Lysandra whispered. “The very vision of a Queen on her wedding day.” Aelin blushed but couldn’t help but agree. Though her insides were in turmoil, her outward appearance made Aelin look regal.

Elide, standing to her left, handed her the bouquet of flowers, the normal white roses mixed in with orange kingsflame, her favorite. Aelin gratefully accepted the bouquet while both Lysandra and Elide picked up their own bouquets of white roses and greens. Both were resplendent in their dark green gowns, looking every ounce the beautiful ladies they were. 

It was like everything had passed in the blink of an eye. One moment, Aelin was standing in front of the mirror, the next she was watching the back of Lysandra as she made her way to the aisle. Aelin stayed just out of sight of the crowd but she had a nice vantage point. There were so many people. But that wasn’t what took her breath away. No, that honor belonged to the beautiful man at the end of the aisle, dressed in a tuxedo of the darkest grey with green accents. She knew already that the color would match his emerald eyes, the same eyes she had come to know better than the back of her hand. 

The violins swelled and Aelin took that as her cue. She was walking herself down the aisle. No man or lord of Terrasen could hold that honor in replacement of her parents. So she would be the strong queen she was and give herself away. The first few steps were easy. She barely even noticed the crowd. The next few…not so much. The moment she met the green eyes down the aisle, Aelin’s heart started beating erratically, overcome with so much joy and love. 

Love. 

Yes, for indeed, that was what she was feeling. She loved Rowan. Probably more than she loved anyone ever before. Not like this. The thought had her feet slowing of their own volition. 

It was for that very reason that she couldn’t make him do this. He deserved to feel how she felt now. He deserved to have a love that obliterated his soul and rebuilt him better and stronger. Just like he’d done for her. If the lords hadn’t forced their way into her and Rowan’s lives, then he wouldn’t have had to marry her just because he was told to.

She knew Rowan was looking at her with concern when her feet came to a complete stop. Aelin felt hot. Her breaths were coming in too fast and she could feel a line of sweat rolling down her spine. The walls were closing in and her vision was going fuzzy at the edges. Distantly, she could see Rowan stepping down from the raised dais but she had to get out of there and go somewhere where she could breathe. 

So she ran. 

Her condition didn’t allow her to run far but the distant shouts followed her all the way to the courtyard right outside of the palace. She knelt on the brick patio, not caring if her dress was ruined. She had to get herself together. For the good of the kingdom. 

Hurried footsteps sounded from behind her and she assumed it would be Lysandra or Elide. Or maybe Darrow coming to yell at her to get her ass into the throne room and get married. But as the footsteps slowed, a familiar and comforting pine and snow scent washed over her. A warm, callused hand gently touched her back, rubbing small lines down her spine. 

“Fireheart,” Rowan whispered. His other hand gravitated toward her chin, pulling gently so that he could look into her eyes. “What’s wrong?”

Aelin just shook her head, tears running down her face. Lysandra would be pissed if her makeup was ruined but she could deal with it. 

“Please, Aelin. Talk to me. Don’t shut me out.”

Aelin sighed and gathered herself as best she could. “I can’t…I can’t make you do this.”

“Aelin–” he was shaking his head.

“No, let me finish.” She wiped at her eyes and then took the hand that was holding her chin. “You deserve everything, Rowan. We didn’t get along first but now…You are one of the most selfless people I know.  You did this because your queen commanded you to. And then when she was gone, you did this because I’d lose my throne if you didn’t. And you did that because you’re selfless and you’re good. So I’m trying to be selfless now and set you free. You don’t have to do this just because someone ordered you to. You deserve so much more than an arranged marriage. You deserve to go out there and find the love of your life and do it because you want to do it, not because someone told you to. I will not be that kind of queen.” 

Rowan looked shocked. His mouth was hanging open slightly, his brows furrowed. Aelin could tell he was at a loss for words. “You deserve to be able to have that happily ever after with Lyria if you want to.” Aelin knew her smile didn’t reach her eyes; it felt forced. She felt an undeniable pang in her heart as she spoke the words. But she was being selfless. This was what was best for Rowan. But she also thought about herself. Not, of course, that she didn’t want to marry Rowan because she did. But rather, she thought about the good of her kingdom and the severity of her future as queen. “And I deserve to be able to rule without a husband by my side.” 

Rowan shook his head, still tense. “But your throne…”

“I think it’s about time I marched in there and showed the lords of Terrasen what a queen really looks like, don’t you think? If I don’t do this now, who’s to say that they’ll ever listen to me? Today sets a precedent. I am the queen that I want to be, that my mother wanted me to be. And it’s about time the lords understood that.”

At her little speech, a smile finally made its way to Rowan’s face. His hand cupped her cheek as his thumb brushed away lingering tears, though she could tell a few of his own tears were starting to form. “My brave, beautiful Fireheart.” 

Aelin placed her hand over his own, leaning her face into it and basking in what might be the last time that he touched her like this. 

His voice was hoarse when he spoke again, much more serious than the minute before. “If this is truly what you want, then I’ll be by your side. Always and to whatever end.” 

Aelin felt teary again as she looked up into his eyes, the warmth in them mixed with the longing in her own hitting her like a brick. “To whatever end.” 

Rowan got up and offered her his hand. He helped her to brush off her gown, making sure she looked every inch the queen that she was. “Ready, Fireheart?” 

“Ready,” she whispered back. 

As they got to the doors, Aelin stopped Rowan and took a deep breath. “I have to walk in there alone.” 

Rowan nodded. “That may be the case, but I’ll be here every step of the way.” He placed a hand over his heart.

He started walking away but Aelin stopped him before he could get too far. “Rowan.”

He turned, concern etching over his features. She walked up to him slowly, placing both of her hands on either side of his cheeks. Gently, she stood on her tiptoes, bringing her lips to his in a quick peck. The only kiss she would ever get from him. “Thank you,” she whispered. 

He blinked slowly, as if in a haze, and Aelin took that opportunity to turn toward the grand doors, steeling herself for what might be the greatest battle of her life. She had given up on fighting the lords but now, she had something to fight for: not only her freedom, but Rowan’s as well. And for him, she would do anything.

Aelin confidently made her way down the aisle once the doors were opened. The violinist and pianist struggled to keep up with her brisk pace. Good, she didn’t want fanfare for what she had to do anyway. 

Almost every person in the room had a bewildered look on their face. All except one. She saw a familiar head of silver hair sneak in through the side door, standing by one of the columns to her right. As she met his eyes, he gave her a soft smile and an encouraging nod.

Aelin took a deep breath and began. 

“I know you all were expecting a wedding. So I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news when I say that there won’t be one.” As she spoke, she met each of the lords’ eyes, trying to convey both her authority and regality. “My mother and father believed in marrying for love. Though they both were royal blood, my mother always said that she would’ve chosen my father in every life, no matter his status. They were lucky to have such a strong, unyielding bond and I miss them every day. But that’s not the point here. The point is that she also raised me to be strong and independent on my own, without a husband. No matter how I may feel about a potential spouse, I should be able to rule without one. My uncle was never forced to marry to assume the throne nor was he forced to produce heirs.” She gave a pointed look at Darrow.

 “I would say it’s quite sexist to assume that I will do any less of a job simply because I am a woman. Terrasen is my home. It’s my greatest love and my greatest honor. No one will fight harder for Terrasen than I will.” She paused, catching her breath and once again looking to each of the lords. “So I am asking you, lords of Terrasen. I am asking you to change the law. See what I have done for Terrasen already, all that I have given, and know that I will continue to give all that I am until my dying breath. Allow both myself and future rulers to choose their fates without the pressure to get married or produce an heir. Allow Prince Rowan to be able to walk his own path that no ruler set out before him.”

Aelin stopped after that. What more could she say? She would not be reduced to begging. 

To her surprise, the oldest of the lords, Lord Gunnar, arose and began to speak. “I have heard you, Aelin of the Wildfire, and I commend you for your bravery and honesty. I’ve been alive for a very long time and it is true that we have never held a ruler to such standards as we are now. My deceased wife would be smacking me with her cane if she knew that I held back such a wonderful and intelligent young woman from ruling simply because she does not have a husband. I say it’s time for Terrasen to change.” Aelin’s heart was beating so rapidly that she wasn’t sure if it was still beating or if it had stopped in her chest. “I make a motion to repeal the law that says any ruler must be married by age twenty-one. Does anyone second that motion?”

An unsettling silence like nothing Aelin ever heard settled over the grand ballroom. 

Darrow was the next to rise, one hand raised and one over his heart. “I will second that motion.” And after that, one by one, the lords of Terrasen arose to reign in a new era, beginning with herself. 

She couldn’t help but let a few tears fall as she looked over the crowd. Once again, she met Rowan’s eyes, which also were wet and glowing with pride. 

“This is blasphemy!” A voice cried out. Lord Hamel rose from his seat, hand resting on the sword that hung at his side. “We’re changing the law for an inexperienced wretch who has proven time and time again that she is incapable of handling this kingdom. Just look at what happened a few weeks ago in the woods. If she can’t defend herself, how can we expect her to defend Terrasen?” 

Arobynn’s assistant stood next to him, as well, and Aelin did nothing as she assessed the situation. Her eyes went from Arobynn’s silvery eyes, to his burning fire of hair, to the hand he had draped casually on his sword, ready to strike her down if needed. He was close enough to do so, she realized. Her attention drifted to his assistant, who looked at her with fiery hatred, and lastly, her gaze went to his boots. Boots that she recognized. Brown leather, worn yet polished and splattered with mud residue. 

Aelin tried to hide her surprise but she couldn’t help her brows furrowing and her eyes widening as she realized who this man was. It was never Maeve that was trying to have her killed, it was Arobynn. He had sent the rider after her that night, knocking her unconscious and almost killing her in the process. 

“You…you were the one who attacked me.” Aelin was breathing heavily. 

Her panicked eyes went to Rowan. Her first mistake. He looked as concerned as she did, though he hadn’t put the pieces together yet. He started toward Arobynn, hoping to catch him, but during the brief time she looked away, Arobynn lunged, holding her in a tight chokehold, almost but not quite cutting off her airway. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move, and certainly couldn’t speak.

“I was supposed to be king! We deserve a true Terrasenian on the throne, not some whore who married a foreigner.” His hand grabbed her cheek roughly and he forced his mouth  toward her ear. “You were supposed to die that night. Such a tragic death, a young woman who already lost her parents and her uncle. But it would’ve paved the way for me to rule Terrasen the way it was meant to be ruled.” 

Aelin shoved her terror down, burrowing into her calm as best she could. She could get out of this position, she had done so a few weeks prior when sparring with Rowan, who now was close enough that he could take Arobynn down after she escaped. With ease, she dropped her legs out from under her, the breath whooshing out of her lungs as Arobynn’s hold tightened on her throat. But the drop had the intended effect, knocking Arobynn off balance and allowing Aelin to forcefully maneuver her way out of his hold. 

As soon as she was clear, Rowan swept in, holding Arobynn by the arm and twisting until he was laying on the ground. Guards rushed past, subduing the red-haired traitor and allowing Rowan to check on her. 

He grabbed her cheeks gently, bringing his forehead to hers. “Fireheart,” he whispered. A shaky breath left him before he enveloped her in an embrace. She could feel her lips quivering, the shock and fear finally catching up to her. He held her tight and allowed her to bury her face into his chest until she gathered herself once more, ready to face her kingdom. 

She wasn’t sure how long they stayed there but eventually, she was pulled away from Rowan by the lords and her ladies to attend to official business. She found out from the lords that Arobynn would be put in the cells beneath the castle until his trial in a few weeks, where he hopefully would be convicted and left to rot. Her coronation was to be scheduled in less than a month, right after she turned 21. And Rowan…Rowan would most likely go back to his rooms and start packing for the journey back to Doranelle. 

She had won today. Getting the old, cranky lords to change the laws to the benefit of both the kingdom and future rulers was no small feat. But if that were the case, why did it feel like she had lost so much?

A/N: I know, I'm leaving you guys hanging! But hopefully I'll be able to get the last chapter and epilogue out next weekend. I'm sure they'll be totally fine ;)

Tagging:

ROWAN POV

Let it be known to the entire kingdom that Prince Rowan Whitehthorn of Doranelle was freaking the fuck out. He left Aelin in the gym room after sparring with a promise of breakfast the next morning, knowing that both of them needed to calm the fire that was roaring in their blood. He slept fitfully the rest of the night, having an overabundance of emotions rolling around his head. Every time he’d close his eyes, images of Aelin’s smooth creamy skin would flash through his mind. He would hear her heavy pants as they sparred in his ears. Could practically taste each of the beads of sweat that rolled down her neck and into her cleavage. 

It really was a blessing when morning came. He barely had any good sleep and the only way to calm the raging fire was to see the match that caused it. 

Only, then, she was a half hour late to breakfast. And then 30 minutes became 60. And after that, Rowan started to worry. Aelin liked to sleep in, sure. But she had never been this late without sending some kind of word. He hoped that he didn’t scare her off last night. Hoped he hadn’t pushed things too far. 

He got up in search of her, finding Lysandra already on her way to Aelin’s room.

“Lysandra!” The woman in question turned at the sound of his voice and gave him a small smile. 

“What can I do for you, Prince? On your way to see your betrothed?” She gave him a knowing smirk.

“Yes, I suppose so. Aelin was supposed to meet me for breakfast but she never showed. I was getting worried.”

“Oh, I’m sure it’s nothing to be worried about. You know how Aelin is. Would sleep until the sun set if the kingdom allowed it.” They arrived at her rooms, Lysandra grabbing the door handle. “Wait here. I’m not sure Her Highness would want you to see the rat's nest that is her hair in the morning.”

Rowan appreciated the attempt at humor and calming his anxiety but he couldn’t quell the horrible feeling that something was very wrong. 

He heard Lysandra calling Aelin’s name once, twice. And before she could say it again, he muttered a fuck it and pushed his way inside. The bed was empty. And from Lysandra’s repetition of Aelin’s name again, it was safe to say that she wasn’t anywhere in her room. The bed was pristine and unruffled, the sheets cool, indicating that even if she did come back here at some point last night, she hadn’t been here for a while. 

Lysandra returned to the main bedroom with a look of alarm on her face. “It’s not unlike Aelin to sneak out but she always, always comes back or at least tells me before she leaves.” Rowan’s panic was close to overflowing. But nothing would get done if he let it take over. He had to find Aelin. He had to. He and Lysandra rushed to find Aedion, hoping the tall, blond man knew where his look-alike cousin was. But it was to no avail. The General looked as if he was about to throw up when they told him they couldn’t find her, imitating how Rowan was feeling. Each one of them tried her cell phone a few times only to get no response.  

With quick efficiency, Aedion dispatched a few different patrols through the castle and its surrounding grounds. Rowan, instead of waiting around, volunteered for the patrol to the Oakwald, knowing that Aelin favored those paths for walking and horseback riding. He was paired with a few members of the famed Bane, the elite group of military combatants trained by Aedion himself. Rowan had confidence that if anyone would be able to find his fiance, they would. 

In the end, they split up to cover more ground. All three members of the bane and himself spread out in a fan shape, each of them scouring a path through the heavy brush. His emotions were all over the place at the moment. His fiance was missing and if he didn’t find her soon, he wasn’t sure what he’d do. With each step they took into the forest, his fears of finding her body lying prone and broken worsened. 

After hours of searching, a sharp whinny sounded from his left. A horse came bounding through the thick copse of trees. He immediately recognized the blanket laying across the horse’s back, its bright yellow color indicating it was Kasida, Aelin’s horse. 

“No,” Rowan whispered. All of the air left his lungs in a whoosh and he could hear his heart beating a thunderous beat in his ears. It was all he could do to grab onto Kasida’s mane, holding tight so that she wouldn’t run away.

With tenderness, he stroked the side of her neck, whispering, “Where is she, girl? Where is Aelin?” He dug his forehead into the side of Kasida’s mane, praying to any Gods that were listening. Kasida gave another huff and whinny, grinding her hooves into the ground. Slowly, she began moving forward, Rowan still holding onto her reins but allowing her to lead the way.

It could’ve been miles for how slowly it felt like they were moving, but eventually, Rowan came upon a path with hoof marks. The marks were seemingly fresh, the muddy terrain providing a visible trail that led deeper into the forest. Rowan’s head emptied of all thoughts as he spotted golden hair peeking out from under the brush in the distance. 

“Aelin!” He sprinted over to where she was laying, his breath coming in heavy pants. It was all he could do to control the fear that was again rushing through his blood. As soon as he crouched down, he felt bile rising in his throat. She could’ve been sleeping for how peaceful she looked. But the pool of blood underneath her head painted a different scene. 

“Shit. Shit! Aelin!” He gently pressed two fingers into her neck, searching for a pulse. He could’ve cried for the relief he felt when he felt the faintest flutter beneath his fingertips. He pressed his forehead to her own. “Aelin. Please wake up. Please.” He didn’t expect a response with her state but he was still disappointed when she stayed quiet. “Help! Over here! I found her!” Rowan kept yelling. But the other members of his search party were too damn slow. 

He knew a little first aid from his time as a soldier, remembering that he probably shouldn’t move her given her injuries. But he didn’t know how long she’d been out here and his desperation eventually got the better of him. Picking her up, he ran as fast as he could back towards the palace, Kasida luckily following on his heels. In his haze of fear, he noted to himself to give the horse an extra treat later. 

As soon as he reached the palace grounds, Aedion came bounding down the stairs from the front entrance. 

“What the fuck! Aelin!” Aedion’s tone was frantic with worry. “Is she okay?!” 

Rowan didn’t answer, only concerned with getting his fiance to her rooms and getting a doctor. Ideally, she should be taken to the hospital for evaluation but given that the palace doctor would be closer, he chose that route. “Get the doctor and send him to her rooms,” he ordered Aedion. The other man hesitated, eyes wide. “Aedion! Now!” At Rowan’s commanding tone, the commander took off running just as Rowan resumed his own. 

Gently, he laid Aelin down on her bed, not caring that her still weeping wound would tarnish the crisp white sheets. With the utmost gentleness, he brushed her muddy and blood-covered hair away from her forehead. He suppressed a sob at the wounds he uncovered as he took her face in. Her forehead was covered in scratches and bruises were beginning to form on the apple of her cheek. 

A lone tear escaped and ran down his cheek, only to land on Aelin’s own. He buried his face in her neck and allowed himself a moment of weakness. A sob escaped his lips. He wasn’t sure how it happened, nor when, but Aelin weaseled herself deep into his heart. The woman who he couldn't even stand to be in the same room with at first somehow became one of the most important people in his life. He should've been startled at the realization that she was quickly becoming his best friend and closest confidant. But he wasn’t. Because caring for Aelin felt like one of the most natural things in the world. He appreciated her more than he could ever say, more than he could ever find words for. But if– no, when— she woke up, he sure as hell was going to find innumerable ways to show her how much she meant to him. 

The doctor arrived in a whirlwind, sending Rowan out into the hallway as he checked Aelin. Rowan would’ve fought the man on leaving if it wasn’t for propriety’s sake. He knew he would eventually see all of his future wife, anyway. But he wanted that to be on her own terms. So he swallowed his worry and fear and allowed the doctor to do his job. 

Aedion eventually came to sit aside of him and Rowan could feel the ire radiating off of him. Rowan felt the same way. While there was a chance that Aelin simply had fallen off of her horse, Rowan’s suspicions said otherwise. The wound on the back of her head pointed to someone hitting her from behind, the scratches on her face indicating somewhat of a struggle. So no, he didn’t think one of the most athletic women he ever met fell off of her horse. The horse that was an absolute sweetheart and was the reason he found his fiance in the first place. 

Which begged the question: what happened?

The doctor came out into the hallway, gently shutting the door behind him. Both Aedion and Rowan waited with bated breath for his assessment. 

“Her Highness will be fine. She has a concussion from the wound on the back of her head. I wrapped it as best I could but it was mainly already healed over. Given that the bleeding has stopped and the cut is simply weeping, I don’t think she has any internal bleeding but it may be a good idea when she wakes up to get a quick scan of her brain.”

“But she was in a pool of blood when I found her.” Rowan hated how his voice shook. 

“Head wounds tend to bleed a bit more,” the doctor reassured him. “But she does have a few contusions on her ribs and she will have a very sore tailbone for a while. It’ll be good for her to take it easy for a few days to a week once she wakes up.”

“Do you have any idea what caused the wound on the back of her head?” Aedion picked the question right out of Rowan’s own mind. 

“The wound seems to have been caused by blunt force trauma.” The doctor’s eyes were downcast, understanding what this meant. But Rowan needed to confirm. “Blunt force trauma. So that wound is not from a fall off of a horse, correct?” The doctor gave a nod of assent. “And do we have any idea what sort of object could cause that?” 

“My best guess would be something similar to a baseball bat. The wound has a wide berth but no puncture marks, which indicates its bluntness. Something perhaps like a cane, though I think that might be a bit too small for this type of injury. A block of wood or stone could also have been used.” 

Rowan took a deep breath in and out, trying to quell the fury that was beginning to swell in his veins. Someone tried to kill, or at the very least, hurt his fiance. 

The doctor left with a promise to return in an hour to check on Aelin. Both Aedion and Rowan murmured their gratitude but waited until he was out of earshot to discuss the bomb he just dropped.

“Aedion...I don’t presume to have any command over your or your soldiers. But the area where I found her needs to be searched. I have a suspicion we’ll find more than what I initially saw there. I wasn’t….I wasn’t thinking clearly when I found her.” Aedion was nodding along with what Rowan was saying.  “Why did someone hit her over the head once and leave her there? It just doesn’t add up. If someone wanted her dead, you would think they’d finish the job. Not that I’m complaining that she’s alive but I just…It just doesn’t add up.” Rowan could feel the weariness settling into his bones.

“I’ll dispatch soldiers from the Bane and if need be, I’ll go myself. I promise you that I will figure out what the hell happened. And whoever did this will be brought to justice.” Rowan felt a slight twinge of peace in knowing that Aedion cared for Aelin just as much as he did. 

“But man, while I go do that, you have to go get some rest. You look like hell.” Rowan huffed a laugh at the other man’s words. 

“I’ll rest here. I’m not leaving her, especially when there’s someone out there trying to kill her.” 

Aedion nodded and with a clap to his shoulder, headed off to give orders to his soldiers.

Rowan took that as his cue to go back to Aelin. She was exactly as he left her, though it looked like the doctor cleaned some of the gashes on her face and changed the soiled pillowcase. Rowan settled into a chair by her bedside. The chair was incredibly uncomfortable but hell if he was going to leave her side. He gently took her hand in his, pressing a feather of a kiss onto the back of it. 

Rowan’s voice was barely above a whisper when he said to her, “I promise you, I will find whoever did this. We’re going to be just fine.” He wasn’t sure if the words were more for her benefit or his own. But he was sure of one thing: whoever did this to his fiance would pay and he would go to the ends of the earth to find them.

A/N: This is the only chapter in Rowan's POV. We're already over halfway done with the fic and I'm both sad and excited for you guys to read the rest of it!