#lafwash

“Love you too, jerk,” Lafayette replied. Lawrence babbled loudly, prompting them both to laugh cheerfully.

“Please let go. Please? I enjoy my hair being attached to my head, little one,” Lafayette begged, trying to untangle Lawrence’s hand from his hair. Washington chuckled as he watched from the stove. Lafayette pouted, whining softly when Lawrence gave an extra hard tug. Lawrence shrieked in happiness, deciding he would tangle both hands in Lafayette’s hair.

“George, help me!” Lafayette demanded.

“I’m cooking,” Washington pointed out, unable to keep the amusement out of his voice. “He’s just a baby, Lafayette. I’m sure you can handle him.”

“You are not cooking. You’re just waiting for the water to boil,” Lafayette grumbled, being as gentle as possible as he removed one of Lawrence’s hands from his hair. He was sitting at the dining room table with Lawrence in his lap while Washington prepared dinner. A baby book was sitting on the table, abandoned by Lawrence in favor of Lafayette’s curls.

Lafayette’s hair was one of Lawrence’s favorite things. Lafayette couldn’t pick the boy up without Lawrence grabbing at his hair. Lafayette tried putting it up into a queue, but Lawrence had learned how to pull on the ribbon until it came undone or cry until Lafayette let it down himself. George had no such problems as he kept his head cleanly shaven.

Lawrence did not care for anyone else’s hair, only Lafayette’s. They had tried to test it, passing him to Alexander, John, and Thomas, as each man also had impressive hair, but Lawrence didn’t grab hold the same way. They tried giving him to Eliza, Peggy, and Theodosia, only to get the same non reaction. Lawrence had shown interest in their necklaces or earrings, but paid no attention to  the ladies’ hair. He only liked Lafayette's.

“One hand out,” Lafayette announced triumphantly, waving Lawrence's hand around in celebration. Lawrence giggled, smiling at his father. Washington gave them a fond look. He pulled his phone out of his back pocket, snapping a picture of the scene before it was gone forever. His phone had nearly five thousand photos of Lafayette and Lawrence. They were precious. His amazing boys.

Lafayette had been correct that Lawrence would grow quickly. The boy had changed so much over the last eight months. He was crawling, exploring the house and office so quickly that someone had to watch him at all times or chase after him. He liked hiding in the office, squeezing under Washington’s desk or behind curtains. It was his favorite game, even though it caused Washington to panic.

Lawrence also became noisy. He was always making sounds as if he was talking. Washington was hoping that he would say his first word soon. He had been coaching Lawrence into saying “daddy”, the name they had picked for Lafayette, for the past two weeks. Washington knew it would bring Lafayette great joy if Lawrence said his name first.

Washington turned his attention to the stove, adding a variety of ingredients  to the different pots. Since Lawrence had officially became theirs he scheduled less time in the office. He wanted to be here for Lafayette and Lawrence. He didn’t want to miss major events because he was too busy working. He moved Lafayette closer to the office, something Lafayette agreed to as long as they kept Mount Vernon for vacationing, in order to make it easier on them all.  

“Lawrence no!” Lafayette whined. Washington glanced over to see that Lawrence once again had both hands in Lafayette’s hair. He couldn't help but laugh at Lafayette's misfortune. Lafayette had taken one step forward and three steps back. Lawrence would not be so easily removed.

“You have won many battles, Lafayette, but I think this is one you will not win,” Washington commented, grinning brightly when Lafayette glared his way.

“If you’re not nicer to me soon you’ll be giving him a bath alone,” Lafayette threatened. Washington pressed his lips together to keep in his laughter. Bathtime was always an adventure with Lawrence, who seemed to think the point was to splash all the water out of the tub. Lafayette and Washington often took on the challenge together.

Washington decided that the best course of action was to not answer. He turned back to his cooking, checking on each pot before collecting items for Lawrence’s meal. Lafayette continued to try and talk Lawrence into letting him go. His voice was calm, but his words were full of idle threats. Lafayette even tried speaking in French a few times, which Washington still had not learned, but Lawrence was not giving up.

“If you don’t let go, I’ll leave you with a pack of wolves, my precious baby,” Lafayette cooed, changing back into English. Lawrence only laughed and screamed with joy, unable to understand the meaning of the words. There was a good chance that Lawrence would grow up knowing two or more languages. Washington prepared himself for the day he would not understand his son or his husband.

“Better yet, I’ll leave you with Thomas. That is a fate worst than wolves,” Lafayette sang. Lawrence still refused to release his hair.

“Lafayette, don’t insult Thomas’ household,” Washington scolded. “James would make a great father.” Lafayette smirked, shaking his head as much as he could while Lawrence held his hair hostage.

“Thomas would not be a bad father,” Lafayette replied. “Just very overprotective. I think James has too much to worry about to handle another child in the house.”

“Thomas is quite the handful. I’m sure Aaron has the same issue with Alexander and John,” Washington stated, turning off the stove top and pulling out some plates to set the table.

“Do you think they will adopt one day?” Lafayette wondered. Washington paused, looking at Lafayette curiously.  

“I don’t know. I cannot speak for them,” Washington admitted. “But I hope they will. They would be great fathers.”

“Eliza and Maria are thinking about opening an orphanage instead. Maria wants to try and help as many children as she can. Eliza has a plan already set up,” Lafayette informed him. Washington was impressed. Maria and Eliza were an unstoppable force. Together, those two women could do a lot of good in the world.

“Why are you so curious about other people and children?” Washington asked as he carried the food to the table. Lafayette shrugged.

“No true reason. I just want to keep up on all the gossip,” Lafayette answered. His flimsy word choice gave him away. Washington left the subject alone, deciding they would talk about it another time. Washington reached for Lawrence, tickling his sides gently until he released Lafayette’s hair. Washington scooped him up quickly, carrying him towards his high chair.

“Time for food, my little warrior,” Washington declared as he set Lawrence down and strapped him in. “Let’s see if you will actually eat tonight.”

“He was alright this morning. Ate everything I gave him,” Lafayette pointed out.

“He enjoys breakfast so much, and even lunch is not a horrible affair, but dinner is still a challenge,” Washington agreed, taking a seat by the high chair. He dumped some baby cereal onto the tray, hoping that would get Lawrence started.

“Did the doctor say anything about it?” Lafayette asked, concern taking over.

“They said it could be because he doesn’t like the taste of the food. Switching to solids is a big deal. Perhaps if we experiment with different flavors we will get better results,” Washington explained.

“It’s just our luck that we have a picky eater,” Lafayette joked. Neither Washington, nor Lafayette had any issues eating new foods. They were adventurous with their taste buds, but Lawrence resisted anything new.

“We’ll figure it out,” Washington assured his husband, nodding to the food on the table. “Now eat. I did not slave over the oven for you to only sit there.”

“You didn’t slave over the oven at all,” Lafayette muttered. “Making alfredo does not take any true skill.”

“Daddy’s gonna sleep on the couch if he doesn’t drop his attitude,” Washington said to Lawrence, his voice light and airy. Lawrence smiled, picking up a few pieces of cereal and shoving them all in his mouth.

“Papa is gonna live in the garage if he doesn’t stop,” Lafayette threatened, starting to put some food on his plate. He prepared a plate for Washington as well, pushing it towards him. Washington placed small pieces of cheese and ham on Lawrence’s tray, hoping he would at least try them, before starting to eat off his own plate.

Lafayette started to tell Washington about his day. Washington mentioned wanting to go visit Mount Vernon soon. Lafayette suggested a trip to Paris as well, wanting Lawrence to see that side of Lafayette’s life. They had a lot of plans to make, a lot of experiences to share with their son and each other.

“As long as we get to take the private jet,” Washington insisted. “I’m not flying commercial with Lawrence at this age. It would be a nightmare.”  

“Oh, of course. I don’t want to force him to deal with the public airlines. He’s too young to stay quiet and behave for such a long flight,” Lafayette agreed. Lawrence started to bang on the tray of his high chair, getting their attention. Washington’s eyes widened when he noticed that the tray was empty, all the cheese and ham gone.

Washington checked the floor, assuming that Lawrence had thrown the food away, but the floor was still clean. Lawrence had eaten without any coaching or begging from Washington. That meant he had tried new things, and liked them. Washington messed up Lawrence’s hair, smiling brightly. Lafayette let out a cheer, getting up from his chair and moving to kiss Lawrence’s forehead.

“Great job, Lawrence! You did so good, baby!” Lafayette praised. Lawrence smiled, clapping his hands together before lifting his arms up towards Lafayette. Lafayette obeyed Lawrence’s command, unstrapping him from the high chair and pulling him out of the chair. Lawrence didn’t waste any time. With a smile he plunged his hands back into Lafayette’s hair.

“God dam-”

“Language!” Washington warned him before Lafayette could finish the word. He laughed when Lafayette glared at him. Lawrence giggled, pressing his face into Lafayette’s. Washington got up from his seat, pulling his boys into a tight hug. He kissed Lafayette’s head then Lawrence’s.

“Don’t be mad,” Lafayette begged as soon as Washington walked through the front door. Washington paused, wondering if it was too late to back out of the house and go back to his office. Last time Lafayette had asked him not to get mad the kitchen had been on fire. The time before that Lafayette had broken his arm at a bar. Those three words now sent worry down Washington’s spine every time he heard them. He prayed his kitchen was still standing this time.  

“Why would I be mad?” Washington asked slowly as he shut the door behind him. He tried to stay calm, giving Lafayette time to explain, but he was now on high alert. Lafayette shifted from one foot to the other, a guilty expression on his face, but he didn’t appear to be destress. Nothing was on fire then.

“I know we said we would wait, but I think we’ve waited enough. With you working all the time this would give me something to do. If we wait until your country is organized then we will be too old before we get the chance,” Lafayette explained quickly. Washington stared at him, very confused as to what his husband was talking about.

“I’ll try not to get mad,” Washington offered honestly. “That’s the best I can do.”

“Keep an open mind, my love,” Lafayette pleaded, moving towards him slowly. Lafayette took Washington’s hands and place a kiss on each one. He kissed Washington’s lips next. It was a soft kiss, gentle and sweet. Washington’s shoulders relaxed, the tension leaving him at Lafayette’s kisses.

“I love you,” Lafayette whispered.

“I love you as well,” Washington replied. “I will try to keep an open mind. I will listen to what you have to say. But understand that I am human and I can not always control my reactions.”

“I know you are human,” Lafayette said, kissing Washington’s cheek. “I will be patient with you.” He started to pull Washington towards the stairs, a bright smile growing on his face.

“Follow me,” Lafayette ordered. “But stay quiet.” Washington’s confusion grew at Lafayette’s words. Lafayette guided him up the stairs, walking slow and careful to avoid making any noise. Washington copied his methods. What could Lafayette be up to? Lafayette paused outside the guest room door. Washington’s eyebrow rose. A guest was here? A surprise visitor? That was the only idea that made sense.

“Stay quiet,” Lafayette reminded him, turning the doorknob and pushing the door open. He moved out of the way, allowing Washington to see. Washington’s eyes widened and he staggered backwards at the sight of the room.

The guest room was gone, replaced with a lovely nursery. Washington could not deny that the color scheme was calming and beautiful. The walls were painted a soft grey color with blue and red accents. The furniture, a cradle, a dresser and a rocking chair, were made of dark cherry wood. Washington was impressed by the craftsmanship he saw. It appeared to be full of love and care. The whole room was comforting, or it would be, if Washington and Lafayette had a child, but they didn’t. At least not one that Washington knew about. Lafayette’s explanation from early suddenly made sense.

“Gilbert,” Washington muttered, using Lafayette’s first name to prove his point. “Please tell me you did not do what I fear you did.” Lafayette hummed innocently, walking into the room before Washington could stop him. Washington watched as Lafayette moved towards the cradle. He looked down it, making a small cooing noise. Washington scowled.

“Gilbert, we talked about this,” Washington hissed, trying to keep his voice down. “We don’t have the time or-”

“You do not have time. As I said earlier, you are busy so often and I am lonely. I want this house to be filled with people, George. This is the way to do it,” Lafayette argued.

“That is not a good enough reason,” Washington disagreed. “This is a major step. It should not be taken lightly.”

“I don’t take it lightly,” Lafayette protested, a touch of anger in his tone. “I have many reasons for doing this. I don’t want to wait until we are old. I don’t want to watch other couples and be envious. I can name many, many reasons for doing this. Do you wish to hear them all?” Washington sighed, shaking his head.

“I don’t need to hear them all,” he replied, moving towards Lafayette slowly. “I only wish to make sure that you have thought this through all the way.” Lafayette turned away, reaching into the cradle slowly. He pulled a small infant from the cradle and tucked it close to his chest. Washington’s heart melted at the sight. The child was adorable. They were still sound asleep, peaceful and innocent.

The sight of Lafayette holding such a child sparked something in Washington. He knew this was what Lafayette wanted. A family, children, a house of noise and laughter. Washington had told him to wait. Wait until Washington was done being president. Wait until the new nation was secure and safe. Wait for this. Wait for that. Washington had been selfish. Had only been thinking about himself. How he didn’t think he was ready.

“What is their name?” Washington asked softly.

“He did not have one,” Lafayette explained. “He was left at the church with no note and no information. I think I will name him Lawrence, after your brother.” Washington walked towards Lafayette slowly, his eyes stuck on the small baby.

“Lawrence,” Washington echoed, testing the name that he hadn’t used in years. “He is so small.” Lafayette smiled gently.

“He is. But he will get bigger. He will grow quickly and the time will go by too fast,” Lafayette muttered. Washington reached out to gently run his fingers along the baby’s cheek.

“He’s beautiful,” Washington whispered.

“You should see his eyes,” Lafayette replied. “They are the best color I have ever seen. It is such a sight.” Washington glanced at Lafayette’s face, unable to look away from Lafayette’s bright hopeful smile. He couldn’t say no. He couldn’t deny this child. He couldn’t deny Lafayette.

“Lafayette,” he spoke softly. “I’m sorry that I have neglected you so.”

“You do not neglect me out of malice,” Lafayette told him. “You are doing what you think is right. I know your heart is in the right place. I know that you will be a good father. I only wish to make you see.”

“I-I don’t know. I am unsure. I feel as if-” Washington cursed himself, unable to figure out the right words.

“I have seen you with Alexander. With Aaron. With John. Even with Hercules. You have already raised sons in a different way, George. This will be no different. You are protective and caring. You are gentle when you need to be and firm when the situation calls for it. You will do wonderfully. Do not let your failures stop you from trying,” Lafayette declared. Washington stared at Lafayette, letting the words wash over him. They wrapped around his heart, calming his worries and silencing his fears.

“How did I get so lucky to have such a husband?” Washington wondered, a grin growing on his face.

“I do not know,” Lafayette replied with a smile. “But I am just as lucky. I love you, George. I wish to raise children with you. To create a family with you.”

“Children? How many do you wish to have?” Washington teased, glancing down at Lawrence curiously.

“No less than twelve,” Lafayette stated. Washington gave him a startled look, choking on his breath. Lafayette chuckled, a teasing smirk on his face.

“You devil,” Washington grumbled, kissing Lafayette’s cheek before turning his eyes back to Lawrence.

“Lawrence,” Washington whispered. “You’re father is too stubborn for his own good.”

“George!” Lafayette hissed in protest. “Do not speak ill of me already. You will turn him against me before he can even speak!”

“I would never try to turn anyone against you, my love. I am simply telling him the-” Washington went quiet, unable to finish his thought as Lawrence let out a small noise. It was barely a noise, more of a loud breath, but it still made Washington pause to check on Lawrence’s wellbeing.

“Do you want to hold him?” Lafayette asked.

“I...I do,” Washington nodded. Lafayette shifted Lawrence slowly, passing him to Washington with great care. Washington supported Lawrence carefully, being sure to support his neck and keep him steady. Washington’s heart started to beat so fast. Such a small infant. So tender and innocent. Unable to protect himself yet.

“Lawrence,” Washington whispered. “My son.” Lafayette placed a hand on Washington’s shoulder.

“Stop messing with it,” Hercules warned, pulling Lafayette’s hand away from his coat again as they got closer to the mansion.

“It doesn’t look right,” Lafayette explained, putting his hands behind his back to avoid touching his coat. Hercules had tailored it to help it fit better for the ball, but Lafayette couldn’t stop himself from readjusting it every so often.

“It looks great,” Hercules told him. “I made sure of it. You don’t have to worry, Laf. Tonight is just about relaxing and forgetting about the world for a little while. Try to not overthink everything.” Lafayette sighed, glancing towards the building ahead of them. The Winter’s Ball was being held in a mansion close to the Army’s camp. It was only a twenty minute walk, but it was set far enough away that it would not be part of any military strategies.

“I’m not worried,” Lafayette replied weakly. Hercules knew it was a lie. Lafayette was worried beyond measurement. He had fallen asleep last night and easily avoided his meeting with General Washington. However, when he reported to the General’s tent in the morning, he could not help but notice the look Washington had sent his way. He was unsure what the look meant, but it had made him pause.  Alexander had been at his side, and when Washington had given them a moment alone Alexander claimed the look was one of disappointment and longing.

Lafayette wasn’t inclined to believe his friend completely, worried that Alexander was simply trying to give him false hope to help Lafayette feel more confidence about admitting his feelings to the General, but it still left Lafayette will an unsure, guilty feeling.  He prayed he had not offended the General with his absence. He did not wish to cause Washington any disappointment or sadness. However, Lafayette did believe that it was better that the General feel insulted or upset by his absence then discover how foolish and naive Lafayette truly was.

Lafayette paused at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at the front door of the house with a nervous look. Hercules placed a hand on his shoulder, offering a reassuring smile. Lafayette gave him a small grin in return. He could do this. He would stay for an hour, at the most, and then retreat back to his quarters. That’s all he had to do. Just a small amount of time. Hercules pushed Lafayette gentle, urging him up the stairs. Lafayette stumbled towards the front door, cursing his luck when it opened right away.

“There you are,” John declared, reaching out to grab Hercules’. “I was about to come find you both. Come on, I want to start dancing!” John pulled Hercules into the house with so much excitement on his face and in his steps that it gave Lafayette the confidence to follow after them. The mansion was decorated for Christmas, with red and green cover every available space. The building was warm and smell delightful, but it was crowded with people.

Within seconds, Lafayette lost sight of Hercules and John. There went his plan for the evening. Lafayette glanced around for anyone he knew enough to talk to, but he could not find a familiar face. Perhaps he should just leave now, before his nerves got any worse. He turned around, heading for the door.

“Lafayette?” a calm, collected voice wondered. Lafayette glanced over and let out a sigh of relief.

“Aaron Burr, sir I have never been happier to see you,” Lafayette confessed. A soft smile appeared on Aaron’s face. The shorter man was wearing his uniform, same as Lafayette, but he seemed very confident standing there in the crowd of people.

“You looked as if you needed a friend, or at least someone to talk to,” Aaron admitted, holding a glass out towards Lafayette. “Alexander told me about your nerves. Are you unfamiliar with such events?” Lafayette took the glass, grateful for Aaron’s presence and the opportunity to drink.

“Non, I am familiar with such things as this, but the last time I attended a ball or such, I made a fool of myself,” Lafayette muttered. “I do not wish to repeat that.”

“I can understand your worry then,” Aaron acknowledged with a single nod. “Would you like to hide with me instead? I’m hoping to avoid as many people as possible and leave quickly.”

“You are my hero, Aaron Burr,” Lafayette declared. “A true hero.” Aaron laughed, looking away as if to hide his smile.

“You can call me Aaron, you know. You don’t need to always call me by my full name,” Aaron offered, gesturing for Lafayette to follow him.

“It is a force of habit. Something I picked up from Alexander,” Lafayette explained as he followed Aaron deeper into the house. They wandered into the ballroom, staying closer to the wall. Lafayette could see John and Hercules dancing. He smiled at the sight. They were truly a perfect picture of love and happiness.

“Be careful,” Aaron suddenly warned, sounding very serious. “Alexander will teach you a number of bad habits.” It took Lafayette a moment to see the teasing look in Aaron’s eyes that contradicted his straight faced.

“I fear you are right,” Lafayette agreed, putting on his best blank face to match. “He is a horrible influence.” Aaron smiled, nodding his head before raising his glass towards Lafayette.

“To friends with bad habits,” he toasted. Lafayette mirrored him, taking a sip of his glass. Aaron’s attention turned towards the dance floor for a moment. Lafayette watched as Aaron’s smile fell. The teasing light in his eyes faded. He looked....heart broken. Shattered was a better word. Lafayette followed the man’s gaze and understood instantly.

Alexander was dancing with a beautiful woman in a blue dress. They both twirled around the dance floor as if they were meant to be partners. Alexander was smiling brightly, saying something that cause the woman to toss her head back in a laugh. Lafayette turned back to Aaron with an apologetic look on his face. Lafayette understood what that heartbroken face meant.

“Aaron,” he said softly. Aaron shook his head.

“It’s alright,” he muttered. “It’s my fault. I made a comment and I guess....he took my advice for once.”

“What comment? What advice?” Lafayette pressed. Aaron shook his head again, looking away. Lafayette reached out to place a hand on Aaron’s shoulder. “We are friends. No matter what you think or believe, you are my friend. Speak to me, Aaron. Let me be here for you. As you have already saved me tonight.” Aaron gave Lafayette a sad look before sighing and moving closer.

“He is dancing with Elizabeth Schuyler. Her father is very rich, very important. I know Alexander wishes to fly about his station. He wishes to make his mark on the world. I shared what I knew about the Schuyler family with him. If Alexander married one of the sisters he would be rich and set for life. He would have the foundation for creating a legacy,” Aaron explained in a low voice. “For once he listened to me.”

“You have your own name, Aaron. You have a legacy already. And he already lov-”

“He does not.....feel for me. Not that way. I am simply a good way to pass the time. He would be much happier with a Schuyler. She can offer him so much more than I could,” Aaron cut Lafayette off. “I only wish for him to be truly happy, Lafayette. This way, he will be. And he’ll be satisfied.”

“But you won’t be. Happy I mean,” Lafayette insisted, somewhat annoyed that Alexander would turn so quickly to someone else. After so much pining, how could Alexander not make his move tonight? Aaron clearly would return his feelings. Clearly. Why were people so blind? How could Alexander not see that Aaron felt the same way? Aaron shrugged, taking a small sip from his glass.

“That is how love works when I’m involved,” he whispered sadly. “I will watch him thrive and be happy, while I can not. It is just the way the world works.”

“It’s not fair,” Lafayette stated firmly. Aaron did not deserve such pain. Alexander did not either. No one did.

“Life is not fair,” Aaron replied. “My advice to you, my friend, is to not miss your chance at your own happiness. Tell the General, Lafayette. Tell him. Or you will regret that you never took the chance.”

“How-”

“Alexander is not good at keeping secrets when it comes to affair of the hearts,” Aaron explained quickly, a fond look appearing on his face for a moment before it morphed into sadness. He finished his glass, staring at it in his hand for a moment before glancing back at the dance floor. Alexander was still twirling without a care in the world.

“I believe it’s time I retire,” Aaron decided. “Thank you for everything, Lafayette. It was nice to share some time with you. I hope...I hope we may get another chance soon. Do not feel too sorry for me. I’ll be alright in the end.”

“We will get more chances, Aaron. I promise. I do not pity you, I simply understand your feelings. Please do not give up hope, my friend. When one door closes....” Lafayette could not bring himself to finish the phrase.

“Perhaps this time, I’ll throw myself out the window,” Aaron chuckled. Lafayette wrapped an arm around Aaron quickly, pulling him close.

“Dance with me once? Before you go?” he asked quickly before his nerves could attack him. Aaron glanced up at him in surprise.

“Alexander said you do not enjoy dancing. You do not have to,” Aaron said softly. “We can simply leave.”

“Please? Aaron just once?” Lafayette begged. Aaron gave him a shy smile before nodding.

“Alright. I’ll lead?” he offered politely.

“You lead. I’ll follow,” Lafayette confirmed, taking Aaron’s empty glass and setting it down with his own. He took Aaron’s hand, guiding him to the dance floor. Lafayette placed his hand on Aaron’s shoulder, taking a deep breathe as he listened to the music. When Aaron moved, Lafayette found himself reacting without having to think about it. The look of surprised on Aaron’s faced as they danced around the ballroom spoke volumes.

“Alexander said you would murder my feet if I dared to dance with you,” Aaron confessed. “But you move as if you know what I’m doing to do before I even do it.”

“I had a good teacher,” Lafayette explained as he followed Aaron through another set of steps. “He taught me well.”

“Clearly,” Aaron agreed. “You move like a natural. I’m very impressed.” Lafayette smiled brightly, unable to stop himself from enjoying the dance and Aaron’s praise. Lafayette glanced around to the other dancers, taking note that Alexander appeared to be watching them instead of looking at the Schuyler sister.

“Aaron, do not miss your chance with Alexander either,” Lafayette insisted, turning back to face his dance partner. “You deserve to be happy. You should at least tell him.” Aaron gave him a sad, little grin.

“Alright,” he agreed, voice light. “If you tell the General, I’ll tell Alexander.”

“That’s not fair,” Lafayette mumbled, shaking his head at the idea.

“It’s fair enough,” Aaron replied. “Here comes the General now.”  Aaron paused their dance, pulling away to bow at Lafayette before nodding towards the door. Lafayette turned to see the General entering the ballroom. Everyone else has paused their dances as well, turning their full attention to Washington. The music slowly came to an end, covering the room in silence for a moment. Cheers and clapping started instead. The General smiled, tilting his head in acknowledgement of the praise.

Washington’s eyes scanned the room. He nodded at a few people before his eyes met Lafayette’s. The air left Lafayette’s lungs. He could not breathe. He could not think. General Washington looked like a dream, and he wanted nothing more than to spill out his heart in hopes of getting a chance to dance with the great General, but Lafayette’s body would not move. Washington did not look away, staring Lafayette down as if trying to convey something.

“Welcome!” someone declared, tearing Washington’s attention. “Come dance with us General!” The music started up again and the moment passed.

“I can’t,” Lafayette forced the words out as three women crowded Washington’s space. “I can’t tell him.” Aaron’s hand took his and pulled him through the crowd. They left the ballroom, ending up in the less crowded hallway.

“I understand, Lafayette. You don’t need to explain. I’m going to head back, do you want to join me?” Aaron asked. Lafayette shook his head.

“I just need some fresh air. Some...space,” Lafayette replied. “It’s not you-”

“I take no offense,” Aaron cut him off. “It’s alright. Go ahead. Make sure you don’t go too far. You don't want to get lost.” Lafayette pulled Aaron in for a quick hug, wishing he could explain how grateful he was. Aaron shoved him off after a moment, laughing as he pushes Lafayette towards the back of the house.

“Go on. I’ll tell the others you already left. Hurry up before I tell Hercules you ran out,” Aaron warned. Lafayette smiled, waving at Aaron before he started to make his way through the house. He found the kitchen, bowing in apology to the staff as he headed for the back door. A young girl stepped in his path, giving him a stern look before passing him a large cookie without a word. Lafayette smiled, bowing low as she moved out of the way. He rushed through the door, taking a deep breath of winter air.

“Such a fool,” he muttered to himself as he looked up. Night had fallen. There were a few clouds in the sky, but he could still see the stars. Lafayette moved away from the building, staring up at the stars as he wandered through the grounds. He wondered if the stars he saw in America were different than the ones he has seen back home. The moon was the same right? It had to be. But the stars could be different.

Lafayette felt a world away from where he belonged. Perhaps he should have gone back with Aaron, at least then his thoughts would have a harder time attacking his weaknesses. He ran a hand over his face, hating how easy it was for him to lose his confidence. He should take lessons from Alexander or John. They were both brave and confident in their actions. He was not.

“Monsieur Lafayette?” a voice called. Lafayette jumped, dropping the cookie in his hands as he looked over. He nearly took flight into the surrounding woods when he saw General Washington coming towards him.

“Your Excellency,” Lafayette greeted with a bow, glancing at the house for an escape route. “You are missing the party, sir.”

“As are you,” Washington pointed out as he stopped close to Lafayette’s side. “Colonel Burr told me you were taking a walk to get some fresh air. Are you not enjoying yourself?” Damn it Burr, selling him out to the General. Burr was the worst.

“I am enjoying myself,” Lafayette replied, making his tone light and airy. “A party like this allows for one to forget all their worries and simply live in the moment. It is a wonderful thing to experience.”

“It truly is,” Washington agreed softly as he glanced back towards the mansion. Lafayette allowed himself to stare at Washington and all his glory. His heart had not stopped yearning. He feared it never would.

“Would you do me a favor, Monsieur Lafayette?” Washington asked. Lafayette tilted his head curiously, wondering what such a favor would be. He did not truly care. He knew he would do anything the General asked, but the timing was interesting.

“Of course, my General. Whatever you need, I am at your service,” Lafayette answered, smiling softly as Washington looked at him once more.

“Let us dance one last time,” Washington declared, a grin appearing on his face. Lafayette’s smile faded slowly in confusion.

“Dance?” Lafayette echoed in disbelief. Washington offered his hand.

“Yes. One last dance. Here, in the snow. That is my favor,” Washington explained. Lafayette realized he had walked into a well laid out trap. He forced himself not to glare as he took the General’s hand.

“Very well. I stand by my words,” Lafayette said proudly. One last dance. Then he would never had to be so close to the General again. Then he could avoid making a fool of himself by having such idiotic feelings. The General pulled him closer, placing a firm hand on his hip. Lafayette felt a shiver run down his spine that had nothing to do with the cold.

“Follow my lead,” Washington instructed, starting to move.

“Always, my General,” Lafayette replied softly. They danced in the snow, making patterns with their feet. Lafayette moved with ease, watching Washington’s face as they went in circles. He wished to say so much. He wished to scream the truth, but every time Lafayette opened his mouth his stomach twisted until his heart burned in fear of rejection.

“Look,” Washington said softly, looking up towards the sky, “It’s beginning to snow.” Lafayette lifted his head, blinking away a few snowflakes that hit his eyes. The clouds had thickened and snow as falling lightly down to Earth.

“It’s beautiful,” Lafayette whispered.

“Yes, it is,” Washington agreed. Lafayette lowered his head, noticing that the General was staring at him instead of the night sky. Lafayette felt his cheek heat up.

“We should not stay out long, sir. You do not have your greatcoat and it is very cold,” Lafayette pointed out, attempting to bring an end to the dance. Washington’s hands tightened.

“Just a little longer,” he pleaded. Lafayette was surprised that the words were more firm. It was not an order, not completely. It was more of a plea. A plea for him to stay. Lafayette could not deny Washington. He sighed softly, nodding his head. He could bear his longing for a little longer.

“As you wish, General,” Lafayette agreed. They continued the dance, moving a bit faster. Lafayette smiled as the snow fluttered around them. It was such a magical moment. One that Lafayette would remember forever. It would live on in Lafayette’s dreams when he was lonely, that he was sure of. Without a word of warning, Washington’s arm wrapped around Lafayette’s waist and tilted him down towards the ground. Lafayette did not panic as he had done during his lesson. Instead, he held tightly to Washington’s hand and shoulder, taking deep breathes.

The clouds cleared enough for the moon to shine, lighting up behind Washington’s head. The snow moved around him in such a way that made the General appear to be from another world. Lafayette stared up at Washington in awe. He would never be able to move past how amazing General Washington was.

“General,” Lafayette said softly, wishing that he could convey all his feelings into that one word. Before Lafayette knew what was happening, warm lips pressed against his own. His thoughts screamed with excitement and it did not take long before he moved his lips against the General’s. Lafayette’s hand tightens on Washington’s shoulder as the General’s hand hold the back of his jacket.

The kiss ended too quickly for Lafayette’s taste. He nearly complained out loud as Washington pulled away and lifted Lafayette back to his feet. Washington released Lafayette’s hand, placing his own hand on Lafayette’s cheek. His thumb brushed right under Lafayette’s eye. The General’s arm stayed wrapped around Lafayette's waist.

“I have wished to do that since the first dancing lesson,” Washington whispered. “To be truly truthful, I have wanted to do that for much longer.” Lafayette allowed his hand to slide from Washington’s shoulder to the front of his uniform jacket. He held tightly to it, hoping to prevent Washington from leaving.

“Let us only speak only the truth tonight,” Lafayette whispered. “I cannot longer live with so many lies.”

“Lies?” Washington echoed, a scowl starting on his face as his eyes filled with confusion. Lafayette’s eyes scanned the General’s face for a sign before his mouth opened and his heart escaped. His eyes moved down to Washington's chest. He could not bear to watch the man’s face as he spoke.

“I have wanted to kiss you for so long, my General. I have been plagued by thoughts of you. Your presence captivates me. Leaves me breathless. I...I confess that I did not return to our dancing lessons because I feared I would reveal my feelings and that you would find them horrific. Perhaps you still do. Perhaps your desire is purely physical, but I have to tell you. I cannot continue through life without being honest because if I never tell you then I will-”

“Lafayette,” Washington cut him off, his voice gentle and soft. Lafayette’s eyes snapped up. “My desire for you goes so deep that I feel it in my bones and I swear it runs through my veins. I will not deny that you are georgous. That you body is that of leagues and myths, but my sweet Lafayette, your mind is sharp. Your tongue is quick. You have spirit and bravery. You are so many things. I fear if I try to list them are now we will freeze before I am done.” Lafayette couldn’t stop a laugh from escaping him. He moved closer to Washington, pressing his chest against the General’s and holding his jacket tighter.

“We are both fools,” Lafayette muttered. Washington smiles, kissing one of his cheeks then the other.

“I would gladly be a fool with you,” the General whispered, resting his forehead against Lafayette’s. Lafayette smiled brightly as he listened. “Please, return to the party with me. Enjoy the night by my side. After the festivities, I wish for you to return with me to my quarters. We have much to discuss.”

“Are you suggesting something improper, Your Excellency? Should I be concerned about my virtue?” Lafayette teased, making his voice sound serious for a moment. Washington’s eyes widened in horror as his face went red. He stuttered, shaking his head quickly. Lafayette laughed, pulling the General into a soft kiss.

“You will be the end of me, my boy,” Washington complained when Lafayette pulled his lips away.

Lafayette avoided the General as much as possible the following day. He knew it wasn’t a good idea. He was aware that it put more stress on John and Alexander, but Lafayette feared facing Washington again. If he could avoid the man, then he could avoid his feelings. John and Alexander were better fit for working alongside the General anyway.

Lafayette took every opportunity he could to get out of the General’s tent. He ran messages around camp, spent two hours in the medical tents to make a list of supplies, and even helped in the stables with the horses to avoid going back to Washington’s tent. Lafayette was willing to do anything in order to stay away from General Washington.  

By dinner time, Lafayette had only seen the General twice. He returned to the barn, eating his dinner quickly as he thought of tasks that could keep him away from Washington’s quarters. He could not return for dance lessons. He would not. He simply needed a distraction. He could spend the night in the medical tents, helping the doctors and nurses care for the sick. That would be a task no one would dare question.

Lafayette quickly finished his meal and grabbed his jacket. He pulled the tie out of his hair, letting it loose for a moment. He ran his fingers through his curly ends, rubbing at his scalp to ease some of the discomfort. He shut his eyes and let himself relax for a moment. Only a moment. Lafayette quickly pulled all his hair back together and replaced the tie.

Lafayette wanted to be out of the barn before the others returned to their shared quarters. If no one knew where he was then no one could send for him. The General could not summon him for the lessons if no one could relay the message to him. He moved towards the door, but jumped back when flew opened so fast it hit the wall with a bang.

Lafayette feared for a moment that it was an enemy and reached for his sword out of habit, however it turned out to only be John and Alexander and Lafayette allowed his hand to fall to his side. Lafayette let out a sigh of relief.

“You have given me a terrible fright, my friends,” Lafayette chastised as he headed for the door. He still needed to leave the barn. “I must go now-” Lafayette paused as John moved into his path. He gave John a confused look, but John only crossed his arms over his chest and stared back at Lafayette with a scowl.

“Something has happened?” Lafayette wondered, looking over at Alexander to find that he wore the same expression as John. Worry started to grow in Lafayette’s stomach. Something had to be wrong.

“Where is Hercules? What has happened?” Lafayette begged, glancing at his friends for answers. John looked at Alexander, who in turned glanced back. They nodded to one another, seeming to communicate without words, before turning their attention back to Lafayette.

“Is this an American thing I do not understand?” Lafayette asked, very lost as to what was occurring. No one offered any answers. John reached out and grabbed Lafayette’s arm tightly, dragging him back into the room. Lafayette was too shocked to fight or even argue as John pushed him to sit on the bed. Alexander shut the barn door softly before joining them on the bed.

“You are worrying me, copains,” Lafayette admitted, glancing at both of them with concerned.

“You’re worrying us, Laf,” John replied, his voice like iron. It almost reminded Lafayette of a parent scolding a child for running off in a crowd. A serious tone to hide the true worry underneath,

“Hercules told us to leave it alone,” Alexander added, pushing on Lafayette’s shoulder until his back hit the straw mattress of the bed. John shifted to press himself against the right side of Lafayette’s body while Alexander took the left. “But it became clear to us today that it has only gotten worse.”

“I don’t know what you are referring to,” Lafayette lied, trying to get up so he could leave as he had planned. John shoved him back down on the bed.

“You don’t have to talk about it,” John assured him, “But you are not leaving. You have been spending too much time by yourself. You’re staying here with us for tonight. We have not had a chance to spend time together in a while. Not all four of us.”

“Hercules will be here soon and he agrees with us. I told Aaron that if he sees you out of the barn before midnight to shot you on sight,” Alexander informed him, his tone too serious to be a simple jest. “Something is worry you, my friend, something you are too afraid to talk about. So we will not make you talk, but we will comfort you. Or at least let you know that you are not alone.”

Lafayette tried to sit up one more time, but John and Alexander placed their arms over his chest and trapped him. He knew he if really fought them, he could escape. Their grip was weak, however the weight of it helped to settle Lafayette’s nerves. Lafayette allowed himself to sink into the bed, shutting his eyes and taking deep breathes.

When Lafayette crossed the ocean, leaving his home and family behind, he had believed that he would never feel comfortable or relaxed in the new world. He had an idea in his heart telling him to go, but he had been so unsure where his journey would truly take him. The colonies were a new place filled with so many ideas and a variety of people. It was just Lafayette’s luck that he met the best people in a tavern one night.

Hercules, John, and Alexander had quickly become like brothers to Lafayette. They teased one another mercilessly, making jokes at the others’ expense. They had gotten into a lot trouble together before the war had started, but it had been thrilling and motivating. Now they were fighting side by side for a cause they all believed in. Lafayette knew he would fight and die for his friends. They were part of his new life. The three men had proven Lafayette wrong. He had found comfort in the colonies. He had found a new family.

John and Alexander were quiet. Lafayette knew John could be as silence as a mouse when he wanted to be. He could sneak in and out of places without anyone noticing just as well as Hercules, however, Alexander was only quiet when he was sleeping, or with Aaron. Lafayette opened his eyes, turning to look at Alexander.

“You are truly worried,” Lafayette stated sadly. That had to be the reason Alexander was so quiet. It pained Lafayette to see the man so quiet.

“You’ve been quieter,” Alexander explained, reaching up to release the ribbon that held Lafayette’s hair back. He did the same with his own hair, letting it go wild now that the day was over. “Perhaps we are over thinking your behavior, but you have not been around as often. Even the General was asking if you were alright.” Lafayette felt his heart stop at the words before it started again at a much faster pace.

“The General was asking?” Lafayette wondered, trying to keep his voice steady.

“I knew it,” John declared, causing Lafayette’s head to snap his way. “I told Hercules it had something to do with the General.” The door to the barn opened, getting their attention. Lafayette wanted to sink into the bed and hide away from, fearful that it was Washington himself coming to demand Lafayette’s presence, but his nerves eased when he saw that it was only Hercules. Thank the Lord it was Hercules.

“Hercules,” Lafayette pleaded. Hercules studied the three men on the bed before grabbing a chair. He carried it over to John’s side and took a seat.

“I told you both to wait for me,” Hercules chastised. “You both lack any tact when it comes to such topics.”

“He was trying to escape,” John piped up. “But I was right. It is the General.”

“I never disagreed with you,” Hercules replied, offering Lafayette an understanding look. “You look so terrified, my friend. Don’t be. I have known for quite some time how you have felt. You are not very sly about it.”

“There is nothing to know. There is nothing to understand. I am not trying to be sly about anything,” Lafayette protested, trying to convince himself and his friends as he looked at each of them one by one. He did not want to have this conversation. He was unsure he could take the shame and embarrassment.

“Even Aaron noticed,” Alexander pointed out softly. “Lafayette, please, we do not mind. You and I must put up with Hercules and John when they are together. We shall not judge you one who you care for.”

“You act as if we do not put up with you, Alexander,” John commented, reaching over to pull Alexander’s hair. Alexander scowled darkly, but Hercules quickly stepped in to prevent a fight from starting by pulling one of John’s own curls.

“Behave,” Hercules warned, looking at both of them with a pointed look. “It’s not about us or Alexander right now.” Lafayette turned his attention to the ceiling, shaking his head slowly. He loved his friends. He truly did. Perhaps sharing his feelings, his issues, would make them easier to handle.

“He does not notice,” he muttered, unsure if the others heard him. No one asked him to repeat himself. No one asked him to clarify who “he” was. They all had heard and knew.

“You could tell him,” John suggested, sounding so very hopeful. “You could write him a letter or something. Or better yet, you could go to his quarters and ask for a private meeting and tell him. Or tell him at dinner. Or-”

“I cannot,” Lafayette stated, shutting his eyes. “I am a fool.” He felt John shifting before John’s arm tightened around Lafayette’s chest.

“You are no fool, Laf. I will fight anyone who dares to call you that. You are a brave, smart man. You cannot control your heart. No one can. You are not a fool for loving someone. No one is a fool for who they love. No one,” Alexander said, tightening his grip as well. “You should tell the General. He is sometimes distracted and does not notice things that are right in front of him.”

“It is because of the distractions that I cannot tell him. This is not the time. We are at war. Everyday is a battle, even if there are no bullets flying. I do not wish to add more distractions for the General. I am also not American. One day, I will return to France,” Lafayette explained, shaking his head again. “It is better for him to never know. I cannot fault him. He has too much to do, too much to worry about to deal with such trivial things. Besides, I am sure I’m not his only admirer.”

The room was quiet for a long time. Lafayette had a feeling that if he opened his eyes he would see Hercules, John, and Alexander talking through other means of communication. He kept his eyes closed. He did not want to know what they were talking about or saying. He had made up his mind long ago when his feelings first started. It was simply better this way. It hurt, but that was only his fault. Washington did not know, and was innocent in his actions. He did not know how much his gaze hurt Lafayette. Or how every touch set a fire in him. The dancing was enough. Those were memories Lafayette would hold close to his heart forever. It would be enough. He was content.

“Shall we give you space, my friend?” John wondered, breaking the silence.

“If you wish to,” Lafayette answered. “I will admit this is very comforting and nice, but I shall not keep you if you have duties to attend to.”

“Then I shall stay,” John declared. “I have nothing to do. Hercules can take Alexander’s spot so he can go see Burr.”

“Don’t say his name like that,” Alexander snapped, a little too protective. Lafayette felt a smile play on his lips as Alexander’s arm left his chest. The bed shifted as Alexander’s weight left it, but the weight was then replaced by Hercules’.

“Tell Burr I said hello!” John called. Hercules and Lafayette chuckled as Alexander grumbled a few choice curses John’s way before the door to the barn opened and closed.

“If only those two would work it out,” Hercules muttered lowly. “They’d be good together.”

“Don’t you think Alexander is a little too much for Burr?” John wondered, saying Aaron’s name without the emphasis. Lafayette opened his eyes to glance between the two. He did not feel awkward being in between the couple. They were his friends and it was a normal occur as they all shared the bed on a normal basis.

“Burr helps Alexander relax. Reminds him to eat and sleep and slow down for once. Alexander helps Burr feel confidence. There is a very good give and take. They bring out a better side of each other,” Hercules observed. “It’s quite sweet to witness.”

“It is not much different then you both compliment each other,” Lafayette agreed.

“What do you mean?” John wondered, moving to lean his head closer.

“You both know each other so well. You know Hercules’ strengths, what he excess at and what he enjoys. But you also know his flaws and weak points. You, my John, fill those weak points with your own strengthens. While Hercules does the same. You make one another stronger, bette. Together you are a true force,” Lafayette explained, looking at John to see the man’s staring at him with a curious look. A smile spread over John’s face.

“That was really sweet of you, Laf,” John cooed. Lafayette shrugged as much as he could from his position.

“I simply state what I observe,” Lafayette replied.

“Still,” Hercules spoke up, getting their attention. “I think you’re right. It’s what I see in Alexander and Aaron. They fit together like two puzzle pieces that create a bigger picture. Alone they are amazing, talented, and smart. But together, together they could change the world in so many ways.”

“I simply worry that Aaron will never see,” John admitted. “I fear that Alexander will only be chasing someone who will never see passed Alexander’s status and family history. Or that Alexander will never be truly satisfied with any single person.”

“If they fit so well, shouldn’t fate be involved? ” Hercules whispered. Lafayette did not have an answer for that.  Lafayette shut his eyes, taking a deep breathe. Aaron and Alexander would fit together so well. They would be a much scarier force if they would working side by side for their own goals instead of the goals of the colonies. Lafayette almost feared what they would accomplish together, but he was excited at the same time. If only Aaron could see it as well.

John and Hercules were also a well fitted pair. They understood one another with a single look. They moved as if they had always had the other around. Together they created a solid foundation that no one could break. They were brave and strong alone, but together they were truly unstoppable and uncontrollable.

Lafayette didn’t tell the others what really happened between General Washington and himself. He told everyone that the General had asked him questions about the French forces and that Lafayette provided as much information as he could. Alexander and John asked no more questions about it. They were both gone by the time Lafayette himself woke in the morning.

Hercules was still there and gave Lafayette a knowing look. Lafayette prayed the man wouldn’t ask him anything about last night as Lafayette started to prepare for the day. Lafayette did not enjoy lying to his friends, but the truth was not something Lafayette wasn’t willing to face. Not yet. Perhaps not ever.

“Do you want us to try to teach you to dance again tonight?” Hercules offered, no judgement in his offer. Lafayette shook his head, lacing up his boots.

“Non ami,” he voiced. “I have a meeting tonight with the General. I have given up hope when it comes to my dancing skills. I will never dance like you or the others.”

“If you change your mind we’ll be around,” Hercules replied. “But don’t worry about it too much. We both know you’re not looking for a spouse at the ball. You don’t have to dance if you don’t want to.”

“I do not want to seem rude to any of the guests,” Lafayette confessed as he moved towards his friend. Hercules shook his head.

“You won’t. I don’t plan on dancing with anyone besides John. You can avoid people with me,” Hercules offered. “Or I’ll dance with you so no one sees how bad you are.”

“You are a good friend,” Lafayette said proudly. He grabbed Hercules’ shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze as he grinned.

“As are you,” Hercules returned the sentiment, grabbing Lafayette the same way. “Which is why you should know that you can tell me things, even things you do not trust John or Alexander with. This war is hard enough. It does not get easier when we all keep secrets.” Lafayette felt his grin vanish, a darkness taking over his heart.

“I don’t know-” Hercules squeezed his shoulder tighter.

“Tell me when you’re truly ready,” Hercules decided. “But be aware that once John and Alexander believe something is amiss, they will search until they find the answer.”

“Soon,” Lafayette promised. “I will tell you all soon.”

“Be careful, Laf,” Hercules pleaded.

“Of course,” Lafayette assured him, moving away towards the door of the barn. “I am off. I shall see you at dinner.”

“Tell John to keep his coat on!” Hercules called as Lafayette left. Lafayette couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him. Hercules was always a mother hen when it came to John. He was the same way, at times, with Alexander and Lafayette, but John would always have a special place in Hercules’ heart.

Lafayette wrapped his own coat around him tighter, shivering as the wind attacked his body as he walked toward the General’s tent. Lafayette forced himself to let the thoughts go. He needed to throw himself into his work. He didn’t have any time to be distracted. There was so much to do and so little time.

--

Lafayette doesn’t get a moment to rest until dinner. He returned to the barn with Hercules and let himself fall to the ground against a wall. John and Hercules sat on the bed side by side as they ate their dinners. Alexander was still working. They would be lucky if he came to eat at all tonight. Lafayette ate his own dinner slowly, chewing every bite thoroughly.

He told himself he was doing it to enjoy his small meal, but he knew that he was really trying to waste as much time as he could. He wanted to go back to the house and dance with Washington, but he didn’t trust himself to not ruin everything. Hercules and John were whispering to each other in soft voices. He noticed each of them glancing his way shyly.

Lafayette rose from his place by the wall, stretching his back and making his way to the door. He decided that he was leaving not because of Washington’s offer, but because he wanted to give the two men some space. Finding alone time was not easy for them, not when they all shared the same living quarters. Maybe that was a bright side of being a General. When Washington wanted to be left alone, he could be alone. He could banish anyone from the room.

Lafayette offered a short farewell to his friends as he left the barn. He didn’t hear any reply and assumed the two men were too busy with each other to even notice he was gone. Lafayette took the long way through camp towards Washington’s quarters, hoping maybe he would arrive too late. If the General was too busy then Lafayette could truly tell himself to stop feeling the way he did. Washington being so wonderfully nice, and strong, and brave, and so many other things did not stop Lafayette’s heart from yearning for him.

Lafayette almost wished Washington would cast him aside to allow Lafayette to move on, but he also feared losing the presence of such a great man too soon. Lafayette was sure he would mess up eventually, that’s what happened with his ex-fiance, and he wanted to enjoy every minute with General Washington that he could. He just wish seeing Washington didn’t make him want to melt.

Lafayette arrived at Washington’s quarters just as Alexander was leaving. Lafayette gave him a small grin, praying on the inside that Alexander wasn’t in a curious mood.

“Lafayette, what are you doing here?” Alexander wondered, looking Lafayette up and down.

“I am here to see the General,” Lafayette answers. “We have a meeting.” That was the truth, but he did not wish to tell Alexander what the meeting was about. Alexander opened his mouth, probably to ask another question, but a familiar voice called his name. Lafayette and Alexander looked over to see Aaron Burr walking towards them.

“Hamilton, come on. I’ve been waiting for you,” Aaron complained, gesturing for Alexander to follow him. Lafayette turned back to Alexander, watching a softer look appear on his friend’s face. Alexander rushed off towards Aaron, words already falling out of his mouth before he even reached Aaron’s side. Lafayette wasn’t even offended that Alexander forgot to say goodbye. He knew that Alexandre had a fascination with Aaron.

It was easy to see. Alexander may bad mouth Aaron at times, curse his name and claim he had no real opinions, but the second someone else brought up Aaron’s name Alexander would jump to his defense. There was nothing Alexander would not do for Aaron, however, it seemed like Aaron was blinded to Alexander’s feelings.

Perhaps this camp was cursed when it came to love. Hercules and John were the only people Lafayette knew who had been able to sort out their feelings, and even then it had happened during a large fight that had left a number of things broken on the floor. Alexander and Lafayette did not appear to have the same luck.

“Monsieur Lafayette,” Washington’s voice cut Lafayette out of his thoughts. “I feared you were not coming. Please, come in out of the cold.” Lafayette rushed to obey, walking passed Washington into the house. He heard the door close behind him and waited for Washington’s instructions. This was the General’s domain. Lafayette refused to allow himself to walk freely.

“Did you eat?” Washington wondered.

“Yes, sir. Did you?” Lafayette could not stop himself from asking the question back. Washington moved passed Lafayette, heading for the stairs.

“I did. Hamilton brought me some, although he did not eat himself,” Washington pointed out.

“I believe he had already made an appointment to eat alongside Colonel Burr, your Excellency,” Lafayette explained as he followed Washington up to the same room as before. The fire was going again and the candles were in the same spots as before. It was familiar in a way that provided Lafayette with some comfort.

“As long as he remembers to eat,” Washington said under his breathe. Lafayette found himself smiling at the General’s concern.

“I’m sure Colonel Burr will refuse to allow him to get away with not eating,” Lafayette assured the General before sliding off his coat as he had the other night. Washington hummed, but didn’t say a word as he took Lafayette’s jacket and placed it over the desk chair. Lafayette watched Washington take his own coat off, allowing himself to stare for a few moments at Washington’s person. He looked away before the General could notice.

“We will work on more complex steps today, but first we shall review,” Washington explained as he moved to the center of the room. He offered Lafayette his hand. Lafayette gave him a shy smile before taking the hand and moving into position. Washington started to move without any warning. Lafayette reacted just in time, feeling his shoulders relax as he fell into the easy rhythm Washington set.  

Lafayette nearly stepped on the General’s foot, but he was able to correct his move at the last second. The proud look that appeared on Washington’s face warmed Lafayette’s heart. He would do so many things if it meant Washington would look at him like that for the rest of his life. Lafayette focused on his steps, wanting to show the General that he had learned and was trying.

“Very good. You have learned to follow well, Lafayette,” Washington praised, continuing his movements, “Let me give you a new challenge.” Lafayette tilted his head curiously at the idea.

“What challenge would that be?” he wondered as Washington brought them to a stop. He tried to make sure his face remained neutral as Washington’s pulled his hands away. Lafayette cursed himself for missing the touches.

“You will lead the dance,” the General explained, a smile appearing on his face. “You must be able to both lead and follow for the ball after all.” Lafayette shook his head.

“I fear I will not be able to lead, sir. I have just learned to follow,” Lafayette protested with a shake of his head.

“I trust that you can do it, Lafayette. You must try,” Washington insisted, moving to take Lafayette’s hand and placing his hand on Lafayette’s shoulder instead. Lafayette took a deep breathe, placing a his hand on Washington’s waist. He could do this. He could. He just had to try. That was the point of learning.

“Begin when you are ready,” Washington encouraged. “I will follow your lead.”

“I do not think you should follow anyone’s lead, your Excellency,” Lafayette said honestly.

“I had to learn to follow before I could lead,” the General pointed out. “The best leaders are those who understand being the one following the orders.” Lafayette saw the logic of that argument, but he was still unsure he could lead General Washington in a dance. Washington stared at Lafayette, clearing waiting for him to make a move. Lafayette sighed, taking a deep breathe and holding it as he slowly took his first step.

The General reacted right away, moving against Lafayette’s step. Lafayette continued to hold his breathe as he took a few more steps. Washington followed easily, nodding his head at Lafayette’s movements. Lafayette sighed, relief filling him.

“Keep going,” Washington encouraged. Lafayette obeyed, guiding Washington through a slow dance. He did not say a word, worried that talking would truly distract him from leading the dance.

“You may change the speed as you see fit,” Washington suggested. Lafayette took the hint and tried to increase the speed of his steps. It took him a moment, but soon they were dancing fast around the room. Washington never falter, never made a mistake that caused him to step on Lafayette’s feet. It was amazing. Lafayette felt a smile grow on his face.

“You can do this,” Washington stated, the words filling Lafayette with joy.

“I can do this,” Lafayette echoed, laughing at how quickly he had learned thanks to the General.

“Steps are only part of dancing, Lafayette. Spins and twirls are also important details in the art. Will you allow me to teach you those as well?” Washington asked curiously.

“I would be honored, your Excellency. You are an amazing teacher,” Lafayette answered, slowing the dance to a stop. He knew that if the General was the teacher he could learn anything. Washington smiled, switching his hands to take the lead again.

“It is the same as before,” Washington explained lightly. “I will guide you and you will follow. Do not worry, Lafayette. I will not let you misstep or fall.”

“I trust you, sir. Always,” Lafayette muttered softly. Washington nodded his head, an odd look on his face. Lafayette tilted his head curiously, ready to ask about it, but the General started to dance before he got the words out. Lafayette quickly grabbed Washington’s shoulder and followed the steps. He let himself fall into the rhythm, getting comfortable.

Lafayette expected Washington to warn him before making a move, or give some kind of signal that a spin was going to happen, but the General gave no such warning or signal. They were dancing one moment, and the next the room was spinning as Lafayette followed Washington’s lead. The quickness of the spin made Lafayette feel lightheaded, but the movement felt fluid and easy. Lafayette didn’t trip over his feet or miss any of the steps as Washington brought him back into the dance as if nothing had happened.

Washington repeated the spin a few times, never warning Lafayette when it was going to happen. Lafayette couldn’t stop the smile from growing on his face. The spins were fun and the surprise was exciting. Lafayette let out a giddy laugh as Washington let him spin three times in a row.

“Good,” Washington said lightly as he brought Lafayette back into the dance once more. “You’re doing great.”

“You are a marvelous teacher, sir,” Lafayette explained. “It is only because of you that I have learned so quickly and so well.”

“You do not give yourself enough credit,” Washington argued. “You have throw yourself into a challenge and come out on the other side.”

“Learning to dance has little risk to it, my General,” Lafayette pointed out. “It is not like a battle or fight.” Washington went quiet after that. He did not reply as they continued to dance. Lafayette began to worry that he had ruined their conversation by giving his opinion too freely. He prepared an apology in his head, making sure every word expressed his deep remorse, but Washington started to spin him just as he opened his mouth to speak.

Lafayette allowed himself to be spun, following the General as he lead Lafayette through a larger spin. Lafayette felt his heart lift at the move. It seemed impossible to be upset, or feel any negativity at all, when he was spinning. He prepared himself to fall back into the steps, but Washington surprised him with a new move.

Instead of returning to the dance, Washington wrapped his arms around Lafayette’s waist and tilted him towards the floor. Lafayette was unable to control his panic. He grabbed Washington’s shoulder while his other hand grabbed the General's shirt. Both hands clinged tightly so he would not fall to the ground.

“Be at ease, Lafayette,” Washington assured him. “I will not drop you. I could never.” Lafayette nodded his head, not trusting his voice enough to reply. He waited for Washington to pull him back up, but the General seemed to be waiting for something.

It felt as if the world around them had paused for this moment. Lafayette could barely remember to breathe. The General looked as amazing as ever. Lafayette could not stop himself from staring at the man’s handsome face. Washington’s eyes would be the death of Lafayette before any British bullet. He wanted to say so much to the General. He wanted to explain everything, but he could not find the words. Lafayette loosened his grip on Washington’s shoulder, allowing his hand to drift over to cup the General’s cheek.

Washington surprised Lafayette by pulling him back to his feet quickly. Lafayette’s hand abandoned the General's cheek as he stumbled to find his footing. He fell into the General's chest, placing his hands on Washington’s chest to keep himself from completely falling over. Washington’s hands landed on Lafayette’s hips to steady him as he laughed.

“Are you quite alright?” the General wondered. Lafayette stared at his hands on Washington’s chest, feeling the heat underneath them. He could feel the General’s heart beating underneath his right hand. His eyes moved up to Washington’s face, allowing himself to stare for once. His eyes looked over Washington’s lips turned up in a smile and the brightness of his cheeks.

Lafayette wanted to kiss him. He wanted to pour his feelings out to the great man and pray for more. He wanted to be the one who stood at General Washington’s side as more than just a soldier. He yearned to be the source of the General’s ease and happiness. The urge and fantasy was so great that Lafayette almost allowed himself to do it. Almost.

“Lafayette?” Washington wondered, sounding concerned. Lafayette forced himself to move away, offering Washington a strained smile.

“Thank you for the lessons, your Excellency. It has been a pleasure and an honor. I am confidence in my dancing abilities now thanks to you and I look forward to the Winter’s Ball, sir,” Lafayette explained, moving to collect his jacket. He focused on the wall as he slide the jacket onto his shoulders.

“Monsieur Lafayette, is everything alright?” Washington asked. Lafayette straightened his coat, pulling it down and buttoning it slowly before turning to give Washington a neutral look. He could not let himself tell the General the truth. He could not put Washington in such a position or betray the man’s trust. He put a smile on his face, pretending that he did not wish for so much more.

“Everything is perfectly alright, my General. I should return to my quarters. I’m sure there is work to be done or someone may be looking for me,” Lafayette explained. It was a sound argument, one that Lafeyette knew Washington could not fight.

“Right,” Washington agreed, though he did appear disappointed. “You will return tomorrow for the final lesson.” Lafayette did not argue as before, moving towards the door instead.

“Good night, your Excellency. I hope you sleep well,” Lafayette offered, keeping his tone formal.

“It’s really not that hard, Laf,” Alexander said, repeating the same words Lafayette had heard his whole life. Lafayette understood that to other people the idea of dancing was simple. The musical beat was easy for others to hear. The steps came to other people naturally as if they could do them in their sleep. Other people could control their bodies in ways that made sense and look elegant.

Lafayette couldn’t do any of it. He couldn’t follow a beat. He couldn’t remember the steps. No matter how hard he tried, his movements never looked effortless the same way Alexander’s did. Hercules, John and Alexander made it look so easy and simple. They had sworn they could help Lafayette master the steps in time for the Winter’s Ball, but Lafayette’s friends were quickly losing hope in him. Lafayette had a sinking feeling that even Aaron Burr could dance better then him.

Lafayette let go of Alexander, stepping away as he watched Hercules spin John around in such a smooth motion that Lafayette swore they two were made to dance with each other. Outside, the ground was covered in inches of snow and the cold winter wind howled. The barn kept them out of the elements and allowed them room for more than work.

“It is hard, Hammie,” Lafayette muttered, using the other man’s nickname out of habit. He hated the look of pity in Alexander’s eyes. When the ball had been announced, Lafayette had panicked. He was expected to be there. He knew he could not spend the whole night dodging dance partners, but he feared making the same mistake in America that he had back home.

At the French court, in front of everyone, Lafayette had made a fool of himself. He did not want to live through that again. He had asked for help, but now he was sure he was beyond help. It was not that Alexander was not a good teacher, or that Hercules did not explain things well, or that John was not encouraging, it was simply that Lafayette could not dance.

“Maybe we should rest for a while. We can try again in a moment,” Alexander suggested, motioning Lafayette to a set of stools. John and Hercules continued their dancing, having a full conversation as they did so. Lafayette took his seat next to Alexander, watching every single move John made before switching to watching Hercules. He tried to memorizing the way they moved in his head, but when he tried to tell himself to do the same thing it never worked.

“Perhaps it is best if you give your partners an excuse?” John suggested as Hercules started to spin him repeatedly.  

“What excuse would I have?” Lafayette wondered. He had thought the same idea, but was unsure what phrase would be the best to use in this situation.

“You could tell them that you do not know American dances?” Hercules suggested.

“That runs the risk of one of the ladies trying to teach him herself,” Alexander pointed out, pulling out some letters to get some work done. They had been dismissed for the day, but Alexander always found time to do more work.

“You could tell people you are already too drunk?” John offered. “That would work pretty well.”

“And cause me to be known as a drunk,” Lafayette pointed out. “Thank you, my friends, but I have no excuse. I am simply a terrible dancer. Unable to woo anyone through such an art.”

“On the bright side, we finally found something you’re not good at,” Alexander teased, voice light as he gave Lafayette a side look. The words would usually made Lafayette feel better, but the ball as too important for Lafayette to be bad at something.

The door to the barn opened, letting in a breeze of cold air that got Lafayette’s attention. He jumped up from the stool on instinct at the silhouette of the intruder. Alexander followed suit, moving towards the door.

“Your Excellency, is there something you need?” Alexander offered, pretending that he was unaffected by the cold wind being let into the barn. General Washington took another step inside, eyes locked over Alexander’s shoulder. Lafayette felt his heart flutter. Washington was a man who could take command of any room he walked into. He drew eyes to his person due to his large statue alone, but it was also the aura of leadership that came off him that made so many pause what they were doing when he appeared.

Lafayette felt honored to be able to serve in the same army as such a great man, but he always was embarrassed that his feelings towards the General were not completely innocent. Washington was smart, brave, and kind. He believed in something bigger than himself and he rose to defend his beliefs. His voice wrapped itself around Lafayette’s heart. Washington’s eyes appeared in Lafayette’s dreams. Lafayette was completely taken with the man, but he knew Washington was too great, too above him, for Lafayette to ever admit how he felt. Washington deserved only the best, which was not Lafayette.

Lafayette followed Washington’s stare, seeing that John and Hercules were still dancing. Lafayette opened his mouth to get their attention, to remind them to show respect for the General, but Washington spoke first.

“Are you all so excited for the ball that you are consumed with thoughts of dancing?” Washington wondered. Lafayette nearly melted with relief when a small grin grew on Washington’s face. With a war taking over their lives, with bad news giving way to worse news, days would go by without a single smile passing over the General’s face.

“Not so much, Your Excellency,” Alexander explained before Lafayette could stop him. “It seems that our French friend is unskilled when it comes to dancing.” Lafayette felt his cheeks heat up as Washington’s eyes shifted to him. Embarrassment sent a chill down his spine. Such an easy task, a task anyone should be able to do, yet Lafayette was hopeless.

“Unskilled?” Washington echoed, sounding lost to the idea.

“Rather hopeless,” John admitted, ending his dance with Hercules to move to Alexander’s side. “We’ve tried, but I think your horse would be a better dance partner, General.” Lafayette knew that John was truly just teasing, which as normal for all of them, but to do so in front of Washington made Lafayette’s stomach twisted. A gentle hand landed on Lafayette’s shoulder. Hercules offered him a kind smile when he looked over.

“Nothing is ever hopeless, Laurens,” Washington replied, staring at Lafayette as he spoke. There was a larger meaning to his words that Lafayette felt they all heard.

“Is there anything we can do to help you, sir?” Alexander said, repeating his earlier offer to change the subject. Lafayette was grateful for it.

“I only came for Monsieur Lafayette. I wish to talk more about our French allies. I will not need the three of you until the morning,” Washington explained, waving Alexander away. Lafayette saw how Alexander’s shoulders fell. He was never good at waiting for something new to do. Hercules’ hand squeeze Lafayette’s shoulder. The feeling was comforting and helped to ease some of Lafayette’s nerves about being talked about.

“Do not hesitate to call upon us if you need to, sir,” Alexander insisted.

“I shall not,” Washington promised. Lafayette grabbed his coat, sliding it on before moving towards the General. He gave Washington a nod to show that he was ready to leave.

“Good night, gentlemen,” Washington announced before turning to walk out of the barn. Lafayette followed right on his heels, listening to his friends return the farewell. In many ways, the winter landscape around them was beautiful, but it was a cruel environment for soldiers. Lafayette refused to let himself enjoy the scenery when it only caused problems.  The cold air was a shock to Lafayette’s system and caused him to shiver, but he gave himself only a little time before starting to discuss business.

“Your Excellency, I have written to France repeatedly I am-”

“Peace, Lafayette. Talk of allies can wait for a moment,” Washington cut him off politely as they walked through the camp. Lafayette stayed close to Washington’s side as they went about their way.

“Sir?” Lafayette wondered, worried for a moment that he had mistranslated what the man had said in his head.

“You seemed uncomfortable with so much talk about your dancing skills,” Washington explained, guiding Lafayette towards the small house that had been set aside as Washington’s current resident. “The ball is only a few days away. Do your skills cause you to worry about this event?” They paused outside the door to the house. Washington gave Lafayette an expecting look.

“It seems foolish sir, to admit that such a small thing creates so many dark feelings inside me,” Lafayette answered honestly. There was no point in lying to his General. Washington’s face showed no clear signs of judgement. Lafayette watched as Washington’s scanned him over. He couldn’t help but wonder what Washington was searching for in his appearance.

“Is Hamilton a good teacher?” Washington wondered, tilting his head just slightly to show he was curious.

“Our Hamilton is very knowledgeable about many things, General, however I do not think he is the best teacher when it comes to dancing. He is rather...impatient. As is sweet Laurens. Even Mulligan was unable to keep his wits about him when he discovered how much of a lost cause I was,” Lafayette answered, smiling easily as he talked of his friends. He truly cared for each one of them, but he knew that his friends were not perfect. Teaching him how to dance was not a strong suit for the others.

“Then I stand by my previous statement,” Washington replied, opening the door to the house and stepping inside. “You are not hopeless, Lafayette, you simply have not had the right teacher.” Lafayette waited until Washington had taken quite a few steps into the house before following. It wasn’t often that he was in the house alone with the General. It felt different not have Alexander or John with him, or even a message to deliver. He was simply here because Washington wanted him there.

“With the ball only days away I fear I will not find a suitable teacher in time, sir,” Lafayette admitted sadly. If someone could teach him, and quickly, Lafayette would take the chance.

“You do not have to worry about finding a teacher,” Washington informed him, guiding Lafayette up the stairs to a small bedroom. There was a chair and desk in one corner with a small bed in the other. A fireplace was built into the outer wall. Night was starting to darken the sky and a fire had been started to chase away the growing cold. Candles were also lit on the desk to allow Washington to work even when the sun went away.

“I fear my English is failing me today, sir. I am confused,” Lafayette confessed with honesty. Washington unbutton his uniform jacket, placing it over the chair by the desk.

“I can teach you,” Washington offered. Lafayette’s mouth fell opened in shock. He quickly forced it shut, trying to get his mind to catch up with what was happening.

“But sir,” he protested. Washington held a hand up, causing Lafayette to force the rest of his words back down. He did not want to be disrespect and rude.

“Let us try,” Washington explained. “It will take my mind off.... less pleasing matters, and it will help put you at ease for the upcoming ball. It will be beneficial for both of us.”

“I would be honored if you would attempt to teach me, my General,” Lafayette agreed after a few seconds of thinking it over. Washington was right in many ways. Teaching him to dance could be a much-needed distraction. It was a good situation for everyone involved.

“It will be my honor to teach you,” Washington echoed the sentiment. “Please, get comfortable. Remove your jacket and come away from the door.” Lafayette obeyed, stepping into the bedroom and shrugging out his own uniform jacket. Washington took it from his hands before he could protest and placed it over the desk chair over top his own coat.

“Did Hamilton explain to you musical beats and such?” Washington wondered, moving to stand in the center of the room.

“He did, sir. He tapped a beat so I could hear it,” Lafayette agreed.

“There are better ways to learn. Come closer,” Washington informed him, offering Lafayette his hand. A light feeling filled Lafayette’s being as he placed his hand in Washington’s. Lafayette would always remember this moment no matter how the lesson turned out. Washington placed Lafayette’s other hand on his own shoulder before placing a hand on Lafayette’s waist.

“Dancing is not so much about following the beat. That is what people will tell you, but dancing is about you and your partner. It is about making a connection and showcase how easily you can follow one another. Music is just the language we use to better communicate our movements,” Washington instructed, his voice soft and calming.

“That is a new idea, sir,” Lafayette pointed out. No one else had described dancing is such a way. Washington smiled, shrugging the shoulder under Lafayette’s hand.

“Perhaps it is not the right idea, but it makes dancing about more than just counting beats or memorizing steps. I want you to follow my lead. You may look at your feet if you must right now. Do whatever helps you most,” Washington told him. Lafayette nodded, trying his best to not squeeze Washington’s hand because of his nerves.

Washington took a small step and Lafayette’s head bent so he could stare at their feet. Every move Washington made, Lafayette tried to mirror it. Washington moved forward. Lafayette moved back. Left. Right. Again, and again and again. Soon Washington’s feet barely needed to move before Lafayette was reacting. Lafayette was quiet as they worked, unsure what to say but also fearful that as soon as he started to talk he would lose his concentration.

“This is a very basic box step,” Washington explained, offering Lafayette the technical name. “I’m going to change to a different step. Do not worry. Just keep watching and following my lead.” Lafayette nodded, not trusting his own voice to hide his worry. Washington switched his steps too quickly, causing Lafayette to misread the move and reaction incorrectly.

His foot landed on Washington’s own boot. Lafayette jumped away as if he had been burned. He removed his hand from Washington’s shoulder and ripped the other from Washington’s hand as he put a large amount of space between the two of them. Embarrassment rose on his cheeks. He did not look up from the floor, too ashamed to meet the eyes of the General.

“I apologize, sir,” Lafayette muttered. “I repeatedly stepped on Hamilton as well. I fear I may have caused injury to his feet. I do not wish you to suffer the same fate.”

“Do not apologize,” Washington said firmly. “Mistakes are part of learning. I have been stepped on several times by many different partners, Lafayette. Do not let it discourage you from learning.” Lafayette lifted his eyes to meet Washington’s, surprised by how opened the General’s face was. Lafayette saw no judgement, no impatient look, nothing that would suggest that Washington was not willing to continue.

Washington offered Lafayette his hand once more. Lafayette took it without hesitation and moved closer. Washington’s hand on his waist felt like a heavyweight, but it was not unpleasant. It causes Lafayette to blush as his thoughts traveled to parts of his mind he usually ignored.

“Same as before, follow my lead,” Washington instructed. His voice was soft and the words were a suggestion instead of a command. Lafayette still obeyed, sure that he would always do what Washington said without a moment’s pause. Lafayette followed each step Washington took. When he messed up and stepped on Washington’s feet, the General’s hands tightened and prevented Lafayette from escaping.

“It’s okay,” Washington assured him every time. “You’re getting much better. Do not let it throw you off. Move through your mistakes.” Outside night fell and the moon rose in the sky. The flickering light of the candles made their shadows dance on the walls of the bedroom. Lafayette raised his head, trying this time to move without watching his feet. He messed up three times in a row, squeezing his eyes shut, but soon found the same rhythm he had before.

“Open your eyes,” Washington suggested softly. It took Lafayette a moment, but he opened his eyes once more. He nearly stumbled on the next step at the smile on Washington’s face. The General looked relaxed, more carefree than Lafayette had seen him in weeks. Lafayette found himself grinning back. Lafayette wished that the moment would never end. That they could simply continue dancing until the war was over and all was well again.

“You have improved greatly,” Washington commented, bringing their dancing to an end. Lafayette tried to keep his face neutral to hide his disappointment at stopping. “I believe your confidence has already grown. Learning to reaction to your partner's movement is only the first step of dancing. Return to me tomorrow after dinner and I will teach you more.” Lafayette gave the General a surprised look.

“Sir, your time should be used for more important things,” Lafayette suggested as politely as he could. One time was enough for him. It had been an honor and honestly it had been an enjoyable experience. Lafayette didn’t trust himself not to mess everything up. He always made a fool of himself in the end.

“I have already explained my reasoning, Lafayette,” Washington reminded him, his tone stern and leaving no room for an argument. “I will see you in the morning and I expect you to make an appearance after dinner.” Lafayette took it as an order, which he could not refuse in good conscious.

“Yes, Your Excellency,” Lafayette answered, bowing his head towards the General.

“Return to your quarters, Lafayette. Try to get some rest. I need you, - and the others, to be at your best,” Washington ordered. Lafayette did not let himself dwell on the pause Washington had made as he collected his jacket from the desk chair.

“Please rest as well, General. We need you more at the end of the day,” Lafayette replied, sliding his arms into his jacket.

“I shall,” Washington promised lightly. “Go quickly now, before it gets any colder. I do not wish for you to freeze.” Lafayette agreed. He gave Washington a quick bow, opening the bedroom door and slipping out quickly. Lafayette allowed himself to rush down the stairs, but at the front door he paused. He glanced back towards the stairs as a thought appeared in his head.

Lafayette was returning to his friends. To Hamilton and Laurens and Mulligan. He was never lonely with his friends around. They distracted him from even thinking about feeling lonely.  Lafayette wondered if General Washington, a great man, ever felt lonely when he was by himself in such a great house. It seemed extremely unfair.

Lafayette forced himself to look away. It was not his place. It would never be his place. He sighed, opening the front door. The cold wind attacked his ears and nose right away, sending a shiver down his spine, but he stepped out into the cold anyway. He wrapped his arms around himself to try and stay as warm as possible as he started his journey back to the barn and his friends.