#label3

Dragon Age, and in particular Gaider’s style was not complex at all. It was a light, simple writing style, yet it was enough to catch you. Thanks to him I’ve started to write, because with his books, he showed me that you don’t need to be a Shakespearian linguist to write a story. Your English can be simple, yet you can develop a lot of tension and interest in what your write. It was a fine discovery. In Spanish you really need to have certain basic skill with the language to write properly.

But this person who has written Destiny’s Edge has not idea about the difference between “simple and interesting writing style” and “Boring, repetitive, and lack of elegance at all writing style”.

For starting, the very first sentence of the book says something like “Logan put his hand in front like a fan”. That was the start of the annoyance. Really, hands are not so versatile. There are not SO many ways to put an extended hand in front of something. You are writing an epic battle, in the first sentence of the book... and your best metaphor goes for a hand and a.... fan?. A fan. A fuckgin fan.

And I’m not talking about the contractions all over the book, in the narrative. It’s supposed to be right if you have contractions in the dialogue. It’s a way to show details of your char’s speaking way; but.... you can’t use contractions in the text. In the description, in the narrative itself. “Tyrias isn’t a simple land. It’s surrounded by danger... blablabla”. Really?. It’s painful, and it’s not even coherent. Sometimes it goes with contractions all around the narrative, other times it goes with the full non-contracted expression. It’s painful. Truly.

Another thing is the constant repetition of the same structure, with the same subjects sometimes. “Garn barked to the bad guy. Eir smashed the bad guy. The bad guy answered to them with another blow. Garn hauled. Eir swore to the Wolf Spirit and....” The worst happens when the author is repeating the same fuckgin verb all along the next 5 sentences: “Eir’s eyes glowered with anger. The anger was glowering from her inside out. Her hands glowered as well, and hit the bad guy, who was glowering”. FUCK MAN. Use Thesaurus!!! for fuck’s sake.

I’ve reached the page number 30. The metaphors are.... SO fuckgin PAINFUL.

“Eir couldn’t sleep that night. She was conceiving ideas as another woman was conceiving children”.... WHAT?. WHAT?.  Fuck you, this is an epic story?. Have you the slightest idea about metaphors and epic genre?. And this person was paid for writing a book, in this horrible way?. God. I want to cry.

Maaaan, I’m a non-native English speaker, I enjoy simple English, because it has flow, and easy words for me to know and not to break my reading all the time to check words in the dictionary. But this is a torture. Painful. Horrible. Argh.

Today, in English class, the teacher, this woman that thinks that is better to learn English by thinking in a rover as a girlfriend,told us that Spanish speakers tends to use words that even though we consider natural, English-speakers perceives them like snobbish because their Latin origin. For example, for us, is by far easier to use and remember the verb "prohibit" than "ban", because in Spanish, that action is written as "prohibir". Another examples she gave us: obligate, sombre [instead of dark] or the constant use of non-phrasal verbs, because Spanish speakers can't perceive a real meaning for them [they are the fuck of confusing] . Besides, why are you going to use a confusing verb of 2 words when you have better verbs in just one word?. So, that's why instead saying.... uh... figure out?, we prefer to use realise, or something like that. Instead put out a fire [I had to look for that... there is too elaborated to think in out, after putting fire on a place, and then you took it out... it's... weird! it is longer xD] we could use another word more natural for us: "extinguish"; but, according with my teacher, that sounds weird for native English speakers... more if you are speaking about a cigarette.