Managed to get feedback from a few different people this afternoon, i'm just going to jot down the main points i've picked up so I don't forget.
1) Keep the yellow pearlised paper, for some reason the yellow works
2) Keep the yellow headers
3) Use thicker paper stock such as cartridge paper for front and back cover, this will have a nicer texture and colour that the cheap tesco stuff I used in my mock up but will also strengthen the book! Or try a blue paper stock?
4) Experiement with type on the cover
5) Change the image all together on the front cover, perhaps move this to the inside page and change the centre opacity to a darker hue?
6) Perhaps bring in one of the Dashed text boxes, to an all type cover?
All in all, there isn't much to change, but I do have sketchbook work to attend to, as its lacking in annotation. No rest for the wicked.