#ketsugi chie

They all turn to stare at him.

“Dear? How do you know that?” Okaa-san says.

Otou-san shakes his head and sits down heavily on the stairs. “The manufacturer for those weapons is in Yukigakure. Just like the incriminating ryo left at the scene of that theft.”

Oh.

Oh sweet Merry.

She mutters, “Shika said—when we were talking about the theft, he said it had to be an inside job, because an outsider couldn’t know anything. But if they were like me—if they’d read the comic based on Konoha in their past life, they would know. They’d know almost everything even if they never set foot here.”

She swallows, throat suddenly dry. “If it was plot-relevant, then they’d know more about what was valuable and how it was defended than people who’d lived here their whole lives. They’d even know the weaknesses of the ninja sent after them, if those ninja were major characters.”

Otou-san nods. “And if he or she needed to finance the manufacture of those weapons, what could be easier than to steal something from here and sell it to another hidden village?”

She sits down heavily on the stairs.

Her heart’s pounding too fast. The side of her head is throbbing in time with the beat.

“Well.” Okaa-san coughs. “That’s mildly terrifying.”

She lets out a humorless chuckle at the understatement.

Horror wars with elation in her brain. Elation at the knowledge that she isn’t alone here.

Horror at the idea of someone knowing everything about this place and deciding to use that knowledge for their own gain. If robbing Konoha wasn’t low for them, would they stoop to manipulating Naruto, Sakura, Uchiha? To hurting them to get their way, change a narrative they don’t like?

“But Iruka-sensei said Yukigakure gave us those guns for less money than they gave them to other villages.” Naruto says suddenly. “Maybe that’s the not-Mayu’s way of making it up to us?”

“You think villains who would commit such an unyouthful action would be capable of feeling guilt?” Lee says doubtfully. “Shouldn’t we tell Gai-sensei about this?”

“We can.” Otou-san sighs. “But I’m not sure how helpful it would be. Nara-san said Yamanaka-san knew about the Yuki connection between both the theft and these “guns”. For all we know, the price reduction could be a concession negotiated between the Hokage and the thief, and we just have a morsel of knowledge about that deal which would endanger Mayu more than it would help the village.”

She fidgets, tracing the scar on her lower lip.

Lee’s brows are furrowed, his mouth pulled down in a frown.

Okaa-san reaches out and smooths a hand over his hair. “Why don’t we get Ichiraku’s and sleep on it? I think Sanji would agree we’ll all make better decisions with some ramen in our bellies.”

Naruto springs to his feet. “Yeah! Ramen’ll fix everything, believe it! C’mon, I’m hungry, let’s go, let’s go!”

It doesn’t quite fix everything, she reflects later as she descales and fillets the pike for the offerings tomorrow. There’s still another reincarnated person who robbed the village, had her father take the fall for their crime, and is now mass-producing the very weapon that killed her past self, which they can do next to nothing about.

But ramen smoothed out the crease in Lee’s brow when they all agreed it was better to tell Gai-sensei than not. It lightened the mood and made everything this day had thrown at them seem a little less important in light of the celebrations planned for tomorrow.

Their small garden is now even smaller thanks to the a large wooden structure that sits next to the back fence.

It’s a bit like a cross between a shed and a greenhouse, if it only had three walls and no doors or windows. The roof is curved and the walls are sturdy, to protect the shrines inside from the elements.

There’s a length of thick white rope fastened with red twine inside the front gable, which is meant to ensure that the shrines are protected from malicious spirits.

Each one of the shrines has a small building that is sealed automatically once the shrine has been assembled, keeping a small object for the deity to inhabit safely locked away from prying eyes. There’s a small recess before this structure, for offerings to be placed, and a little column that puts them above the eye level of a kneeling person.

They’d debated setting aside a space for the shrines in the living room inside the house, to ensure they could be protected and cared for. But she kept getting impulses of outside, of wind and rain, freedom, that eventually they decided it was better than keeping them cooped up inside.

Plus this way, Luffy can’t raid the fridge as easily.

She’s already found certain small cuts of cooked meat have gone missing. If he’s anything like the manga, then she’s not giving him the chance to clean out the entire fridge.

They’ve been working on constructing it and the shrines on weekends and in the mornings during training. According to Gai-sensei, it’s excellent practice for C-rank missions.

Now all that’s left is to paint the structure and the ten shrines housed within.

Working out what to set out as offerings for tomorrow had been a challenge and a half.

For the most part, the Strawhats can be grouped into small sections of what they will and won’t eat.

Nami and Chopper are fruit lovers. Sanji, Zoro, Brook and Usopp are partial to seafood. Luffy, Franky, and Robin are happy with beef and other land-based meats.

However, Zoro, Sanji and Brook like varieties of seafood that are difficult to get in Konoha— octopus, lobster and prawns are expensive and hard to find, while sea king meat just doesn’t exist here. At least Zoro is happy enough with a traditional plate-2-bowls meal with rice.

Robin prefers sandwiches, and she’s not quite sure if the burgers Franky loves fit into that criteria. Chopper can’t stand spicy or bitter foods, but Zoro and Robin dislike sweets.

She’s just thankful that Luffy, Nami Usopp, and Merry are so easy to feed. Pike’s one of the few fish that Konoha doesn’t need to import, so it and tangerines relatively inexpensive.

There’s no chance of combining all their preferences into one dish. Her head hurts just imagining the clash of flavors.

So she had to somehow come up with a way of creating a meal that would (hopefully) make each of the pirates she idolizes happy.

No pressure.

Chouji ended up being her savior in this respect.

And maybe Uchiha did as well, but only a teeny tiny bit.

She’d been brainstorming different versions of meals she could try making that would satisfy everyone, but kept coming up short.

The added tension from Sakura’s friendly-again-but-still-not-quite-sitting-back-at-their-table thing at this time wasn’t exactly helping her think either.

“I’ve got cola, coffee, tea, heck even sake, but still no idea on what to pair any of them with.” She complained, tapping her pencil against the list in front of her.

Chouji had leaned over, a thoughtful look on his face. “Why not make them lunchboxes? That way you can make lots of things in smaller amounts and personalize each lunchbox for each of them.”

“Hm. That is a good idea.” She gnawed on her lower lip. “Only downside is working out when I can cook what and how much time the preparation of each portion is going so everything in the bentos is relatively fresh for when it’s offered... how much d’you think eleven more lunchboxes would cost?”

She’d just begun sketching out lines for a tentative timetable when Uchiha complained, “Why do you think you’ve gotta do everything on your own?”

She looked up, a little offended. “I’m not praying for help with this, are you mad? That’d be like asking someone to bake their own birthday cake.”

“What Sasuke means,” Chouji intervened. “Is that we could always split the work three-ways between us, and bring it to your house on the day?”

She blinked. “You...you guys would help me like that?”

Chouji smiled, then made a squeak of surprise when she lunged over the table to hug him tightly. “Thank you.”

“I have lunchboxes to spare.” Uchiha drawled. “Plus someone’s got to make sure you don’t mess up.”

She had then let Chouji go so she could boot Uchiha in the shin.

As a result of this arrangement, when she wakes up on The Day, all she has to worry about is preparing the pasta for Sanji, Nami and Usopp’s lunchboxes after training with Gai-sensei.

She’s almost worried that her timining be a little delayed because Gai-sensei grabs her in a bone-creaking hug when she arrives at training and spends about three minutes weeping over how youthful she is.

He then makes them run fifty times around the village balancing the paint pots they’ll be using later to ensure that the paint is agitated enough “so its most YOUTHFUL colors will shine through!!”

They nearly lose the purple when Naruto fumbles slightly over a root.

She bolts down her food at breakfast.

She puts on more rice again in preparation for the sesame onigiri, and pulls out a pot to fill with water that’s set to boil and a pan to gently heat some oil on the stove.

She smashes a clove of garlic and drops it in when the oil has begun to smoke gently, deseeding and dicing up some chilis and tossing them in as well for flavor.

She can’t help her grin when the heady spicy-savory scent fills the air, finely chopping capers and anchovies to toss in once she’s fished out the smashed garlic.

The scent mellows somewhat when the diced pike hits the pan as well, and she pushes it around until the fish is almost-but-not-quite cooked through.

Then in with a generous glug of wine and the heat is turned down to a gentle simmer to let the alcohol cook off.

Just in time for the rice to have cooked and cooled enough to begin mixing with yellow and black sesame seeds and begin forming into ten onigiri.

They don’t have any fillings other than the sesame, because they’re designed to take the edge off the stronger flavors of the pasta (her) and the takoyaki (Chouji), as well as serve as a substitute for a sesame topped bun accompanying the hamburger steaks (Uchiha).

The others begin to arrive at around ten.

Sakura and the Harunos arrive first alongside Ino and her dad.

She shouts a hello as Naruto and Lee lead Ino and Sakura through the kitchen to the back garden, nails orange with peeled tangerine.

Ino darts forward and steals two slices, chortling in response to her indignant “Oi!” and passing one to Sakura, who grins as she nibbles on their way out.

Yamanaka-san is totally at home chatting with Gai-sensei and Otou-san, but he snickers when Nara-san immediately gravitates towards him when he arrives. Shikamaru gives her a nod as he follows the adults outside and she puts the pasta on to boil.

She’s set aside two extra tangerines for when Shino and his father arrive. After all, she, Chouji and Uchiha are making enough to feed eleven deities and many many people, so shouldn’t their insects also be able to eat as well?

Shino’s dad stares at her inscrutably when she explains her reasoning, before accepting the fruit with a nod and a “thank you” barely audible over a loud buzzing.

Shino shifts from one foot to the other during this exchange before gently tugging his father’s sleeve. It occurs to her as she drains the pot-full pasta and adds the sauce alongside a cup of boiling water to emulsify everything that this might be the closest she’s ever seen him to being embarrassed.

Chouji and his dad arrive as she’s sprinkling in some parsley as a finishing touch.

They’re both carrying huge containers full of takoyaki and cooked spring greens, and she spares a small moment to be envious of all the amazing things Chouji’s family can afford to do.

Then she launches Chouji another hug to thank him for all his help once he’s set his cargo down.

He squeaks like he did last time and Akimichi-san laughs loudly, for some reason.

Iruka-sensei and Uchiha arrive with eleven lunchboxes, two dogs, Kiba and his mum, and Hinata in tow.

Uchiha keeps sneaking what appear to be morsels of meat to Akamaru and Kuromaru.

There’s also a pale-eyed frowning boy who Iruka-sensei introduces as Hyuuga Neji, Hinata’s cousin who’d been sent along to act as her chaperone.

The boy sniffs disdainfully when they greet him and goes to stand in a corner of the garden near Mebuki, completely ignoring Lee when he waves to him.

She doesn’t think she likes Hinata’s cousin very much.

The lunchboxes Uchiha brought are black lacquer decorated with gold and red tomoe, much fancier than anything she’d been expecting.

When questioned, he just shrugs and says, “It’s just old stuff from New Year’s. It’s just taking up space at home, so it’s better off here.”

She knows better than to say anything like “sorry”, so she just pats his shoulder and says “No, that compartment’s too small for the onigiri, put it in this one.”

“That’s way too big, it looks tiny in that one.” Uchiha snaps, but with a bit less bite than usual.

Iruka-sensei looks mildly overwhelmed by all the people in the back garden. Okaa-san comes along, hands him a drink, pats his shoulder and says “They’re in my house,” in a sympathetic tone.

Iruka-sensei gives her a pitying look and knocks the sake back in one go.

Adults here can be weird.

Finally they’ve finished serving and she calls out “Food’s up!”

The adults come in to help take the larger platters of food outside, a huge plate of pasta, several smaller hamburger steaks in the style of what they’d call “sliders” in her world, and mound upon mound of takoyaki and spring greens and tangerines.

There’s a clamor outside as people begin getting their portions.

She, Chouji and Uchiha are each balancing either three or four lunchboxes per person as they take them outside.

Sakura is helping Kiba paint a pattern of cherry blossoms across Chopper’s already vibrantly pink shrine. Evidence of her handiwork on Robin’s shrine is clear is the decoration of swirling petals and the streaks of matching purple paint all over her forehead.

Ino and Naruto obviously have had a battle over the orange judging by the splashes on their hands and clothing. On the plus side Nami and Luffy’s shrines are looking particularly colorful.

Shikamaru and Hinata are splotched with green, light blue and black-and-white. Lee is smudged with brown, cyan and white paint and beaming proudly.

Shino has yellow paint on the end of his nose and is looking at the detailed illustrations of insects on the sides with pride.

The only shrines that aren’t quite done are Sanji’s, which has a blue overcoat but no decoration, and Zoro’s which doesn’t have half its roof painted yet.

“We were waiting,” Naruto says, holding out two buckets of green paint and blue respectively, “For you guys to add your bits.”

She beams at him.

Of course, Uchiha has to ruin it by immediately grabbing the green.

“What?” He says, offloading his three lunchboxes onto Kiba. “I’ll give it back once I’m finished with it.”

Ino rolls her eyes and shoulders her paintbrush, adding another orange splotch to her outfit. “Ugh. I’ll help Mayu-chan, it’s better to get it done quickly. Let’s go before the food gets cold.”

Orange, red, and yellow fish on the blue background are much more vibrant and eye-catching than green, though Uchiha does “help” by flicking the paintbrush at her while she’s distracted.

In thanks, she smears yellow on the back of his neck.

After the extra decorations are finished, Lee, Sakura and Kiba redistribute the lunchboxes to make their offerings.

The only problem is there’s eleven of them and ten lunchboxes.

“You all go ahead.” She steps back. “I’ll do the next bit.”

Each one of them place the pirate lunchboxes down in front of the shrines and step back.

For some reason, she feels like traditional prayers and chants appropriated from the sage guy won’t really be all that welcoming to them.

But then, what? What could help them feel at home at these shrines, so far from the sea?

Her gaze falls on Brook’s shrine.

Oh.

Oh, well it’s obvious when it’s put like that, isn’t it?

She just hopes she remembers the words correctly. She doesn’t want to butcher them on accident.

“Yohohoho, yohohoho~ Yohohoho, yohohoho~”

Her voice sounds frail and quiet, and she can feel everyone’s eyes on her. Still, she stumbles through the last two refrains of yohohoho’s to the first verse.

“Binksu no sake wo, todokei ni yuku yo, umikaze, kimakase, namimakase~ Shio no mukou de, yuhi wo sawagu, sora nya, wao kaku tori no uta~”

Naruto joins in on the next verse, singing along slightly out of tune and mixing up some of the words.

His cheeks look as flushed as hers feel, and it’s hard not to giggle when they catch each other’s eyes. Somehow they both manage to keep singing.

Gai-sensei and Lee boisterously shout DON alongside them as they join as well, Gai-sensei’s voice strong and sure, while Lee’s volume makes up for any deficiencies in wording. She almost can’t hear Okaa-san’s melodious voice and Otou-san’s decidedly tone-deaf one join in on the second set of Yohohoho’s over their noise.

Sakura and Ino’s voices are both high-pitched, but they carry the tune well enough. So does Kiba, though he’s pitching up to a falsetto for some reason. Hinata’s voice is soft, but she’s genuinely singing, unlike Shikamaru and Sasuke who’re mumbling through all the bits apart from the yohohoho’s. Shino is monotone if precise and enthusiastic, while Chouji has a surprising set of pipes on him.

Akamaru is just howling to the beat. And with that accompaniment, how could anyone stop themselves from singing along?

It feels like more people than could possibly fit into their house and garden are bellowing Bink’s Sake together by the time they’ve reached the third set of Yohohoho’s.

It can’t exactly be called “harmonious”. Everyone’s a little out of tune, a little off beat.

But the mixing of all the voices of her family and friends feels so right, it makes her voice stronger, lets her sing louder.

She opens her eyes and nearly chokes on the next note.

Hovering in front of the brightly painted shrines, slightly faded but gaining color and substance with every passing moment, They stand.

Merry appears in all her glory, as if in mid- sail. Brook is playing his violin, a foot tapping to the beat. Franky is winding up for his SUPA pose, grinning broadly. Robin is resting a hand on Chopper’s hat. Chopper himself is peeking at them the wrong way round from Robin’s leg.

Sanji’s tapping out his cigarette with a grin and giving a small salute. Usopp is waving to them, like a captain would to his 8,000 followers. Nami’s blowing a kiss as if to adoring fans.

Zoro...is climbing over the garden fence and jogging to take his place in front his shrine next to the others. Nami shoots him a Look while Luffy laughs at him, sitting in mid air and clapping his feet together.

The Captain of the Straw Hat Pirates then turns to her and gives her a wide grin.

She blinks away tears as he and his crew fade away with the last notes of the song.

The food in the lunchboxes is gone.

The food on Naruto’s plate is also gone.

In fact, all the food in the immediate vicinity appears to be gone.

It’s just that Naruto looks down at his plate and yells in indignation first.

She opens her eyes.

There are insects on her face.

Oh Luffy, there are so many insects on her face.

It’s only years of practice and the knowledge of how upset Shino will be with her that prevents her from swatting wildly.

“Why are there insects on my face.” She mumbles, moving her lips as little as possible and lifting a hand to her cheek so some of them can scuttle off and onto her fingers.

She doesn’t want any falling into her mouth on accident.

“Because my kikaichū are capable of injecting small doses of chakra into your system, which restores your reserves and helps return the body to homeostasis.” Shino extends his hand and the remaining insects begin flitting off her face back up his sleeves.

Her confusion must show on her face, because he sighs. “Chakra injections to help you wake up.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

Shino inclines his head as he retracts his arm, all insects safely retrieved.

She struggles to sit up. One side of her head throbs a little.

“How are you feeling, Ketsugi-chan?” Iruka-sensei asks. “Do you feel dizzy or nauseous at all?”

She shakes her head. “No, Iruka-sensei.”

He purses his lips and tilts her head to the side, before pulling a small flashlight out of his jacket pocket and shining it in her eyes. “No bumps, and your pupils seem normal...what caused you to collapse, Ketsugi-chan? Can you remember?”

Her breath stutters in her throat at the thought.

“I don’t. Like them. The g— them. Those.”

Iruka-sensei blinks. “The weapons? They upset you?”

She nods mutely.

“Seriously?” Uchiha mutters. “First chakra and now this?”

“Sasuke-kun!” Iruka-sensei scolds, though his tone is slightly exasperated. “Well, if you feel bad again, be sure to let me know, okay Ketsugi-chan?”

Her mind won’t stop racing, even after they return to the classroom.

How, how, how, how can those—those things be here?!

This world is supposed be a ninja story, where people use taijutsu and chakra and kunai and katana to fight.

She’s pretty certain none of the flame wars in her past life ever talked about any characters bringing shitty g-firearms to the mix.

And not just any firearms either.

Nothing like the older models found in One Piece and museums of her old world, where the bullet and gunpowder needed to be inserted separately into the barrel of the g— of the weapon before firing.

The existence of that older type of weapon here might make a small amount of sense at least.

No, those were high-tech, modern firearms, the kind with cartridges that are inserted at the bottom of the handle, with bullets that have gunpowder built into the casing, that are pointed so they can pierce—

She only narrowly keeps herself from retching.

Naruto keeps shooting her worried glances as the day goes on.

He’s resorted to scribbling what happened?? on the edges of her notebook by the time the last lesson of the day draws to a close.

She does her best to placate him with weak smiles and shaking her head discreetly, but that seems to have the opposite effect judging by the way his brows furrow.

Shikamaru keeps staring at her as well.

However, it’s not the same as the concerned looks that Chouji, Ino, Hinata, Sakura, Shino and even Kiba keep giving her.

He’s staring at her like he knows something isn’t right.

Like he suspects something.

She does her best to avoid his gaze when they leave the classroom.

Lee meets them outside the Academy.

His greeting trails off as Naruto grabs his hand and drags the pair of them over to the tree swingset.

“Naruto-kun, what’s going on?” He asks, brows furrowing.

“Mayu passed out when she saw the weapons from Yuki.” Naruto accuses, arms crossed over his chest and brows furrowed. “And don’t say it’s nothing, ‘cause you’re still pale and shaky. Not even chakra has ever done that to you, believe it.”

She glances down at her trembling hands. She squeezes them together to try and make the tremors stop.

“Mayu-chan.” She looks up when Lee claps his hands on her shoulders, staring her dead in the eyes. “Are you okay?”

She starts to nod.

Lee raises an eyebrow.

She doesn’t end up shaking her head but it’s a near thing.

“I’m—” She cuts herself off. “I’m not alright, but. It’s not something I ca-need to talk about. Can we just go?”

Naruto’s brow furrows even further and he makes a face. It’s the same face he made when confronting Ami over bullying Sakura, or confiding his worries about Uchiha’s diet in her. It’s his “I’m not happy and going to do something about it” face.

Lee’s frowning too, now gripping her hands tight. “You can talk to us about anything, Mayu-chan. You know that, right?”

Unseen stares from the surrounding trees bore into her as she nods. She very carefully does not look up.

She flounders for something, anything to make them understand.

“It’s a Tamara thing.” She hisses quietly.

It takes them a moment, but then sweet, merciful understanding flashes across Naruto and Lee’s faces, the pair of them stiffening like they’ve been pricked with pins.

“Ah! Is that so!” Lee’s laugh is too loud, too boisterous to anyone who knows him well. She prays to Robin that the masks don’t. “Well thank Luffy it’s nothing to worry about, right Naruto-kun?”

“Y-Yeah!” Naruto agrees, hesitating a fraction of a second too long for comfort. “You shoulda told us that’s all it was earlier, Mayu-chan, I was worried over nothing, believe it!”

She feels an eyebrow twitch, but tries to contort her expression into an apologetic smile. “Sorry, it’s just a little embarrassing, you know,” She fakes a laugh. “Girl problems and all that.”

“I see! Girl problems! Of course!” Lee says, clearly not understanding at all.

She takes a moment to wonder what exactly the boys do while the girls are in kunoichi classes.

Naruto loops an arm around her shoulders. “Yosh! Let’s get home then! Oka— Mayu’s okaa-san will be waiting for us, believe it!”

“Well said Naruto-kun!” Lee loops an arm around her other shoulder. “Yosh! Onwards!”

The three of them frogmarch home, chattering loudly about nothing.

They could not be more conspicuous if they were dressed in animal costumes and singing a musical number.

The unseen stares following them now have an added side of judgement which she does not appreciate.

She’s already racing upstairs to grab her coats and yukata when they all tumble through the front door.

“Welcome ba—” Okaa-san gives her an odd look when she clatters back down the stairs, clothes in her arms. “—Mayu? What’s going on?”

“We’re home Chie-oba-san! Nothing happened at all!” Lee proclaims in the same breath as Naruto blurts, “Mayu passed out!”

Okaa-san blinks, then grabs her shoulder as she makes for the front door. “Not your nice yukata, young lady, I just finished ironing it again. Go get your towel instead. Then you’re all going to sit down here and tell me exactly what happened calmly. Understand?”

“Yes, okaa-san.” They chorus meekly

Naruto calls dibs on telling his side of the story first.

She begins to regret letting him a few moments after he opens his mouth and launches into an embellished retelling of how she made a wheezing noise at the mere sight of the weapons and dropped to the ground like a broken mast, startling everyone and interrupting Uchiha.

He’s tearing up as he continues, “An’, an’ Mayu just wouldn’t wake up, no matter what, even when I shook her an’ everythin’ believe it, an’ Iruka-sensei yelled at me because he said I mighta’ hurt you worse, an’ then Shino did his bug thing an’ you woke up but you were still so pale an’ shaky an’ scared but you wouldn’ say anything, an’, an’—”

Okaa-san pulls him into a hug as he trails off into frustrated hiccoughs, rubbing his back soothingly.

Lee’s grip on her hand is so tight it’s beginning to hurt a bit.

“Well, Mayu?” Okaa-san says, voice slightly strained. “Was that what happened?”

“K-kind of?” She shifts forward so she can give Naruto a one-armed hug. “Sorry I scared you, I was just...just really, really freaked out. I never meant to scare you too.”

“...s’okay.” He mutters into her hair. “Dun’ do it ‘gain, kay?”

She nuzzles into his shoulder, “I’ll try. Promise.”

Lee gives a cough behind her. “So...what alarmed you about those weapons, Mayu-chan?”

She stiffens, drawing back out of the hug.

“They— they aren’t right.” Her head throbs. “Maybe if it was earlier, a prototype model, maybe. But that kind of g—of weapon shouldn’t be here, shouldn’t even exist.”

Okaa-san’s brow furrows. “What do you mean by that?”

“I mean it shouldn’t exist!” She snaps. “This place prizes ch-chakra too much for their existence to make sense! You lot place a premium on throwing projectiles and close combat because chakra allows you to compensate. The existence of those kind of g— of firearm doesn’t make any sense, because there’s not a need for that kind here like there was in my world, it just, it just doesn’t make any sense, why is it here, why is it here?!”

Her breathing is ragged.

Her head hurts.

Everything’s so blurry she can barely see.

“Mayu-chan?” Lee’s voice sounds very small. “Does that mean those weapons are from your world?”

“I don’t wanna get shot again.” She chokes out. “I don—I—it hurt so much last time.”

Lee hugs like he’s trying to both squeeze the pain out of her and shield her from it ever returning.

It’s almost painful how tight his arms are around her shoulders, but it does help ground her somewhat.

Then there’s softness pressing against her side and Okaa-san’s arm is curling around Lee’s shoulders to pull them both to her, burying her face in the crown of Mayu’s head.

Naruto reaches over and threads his fingers with hers from where he’s curled into Okaa-san’s other side, squeezing as hard as he can.

They stay like that for a long time.

They startle when the front door snags on her winter coat when it opens.

“I’m baaa-ah? Darling, is the door broken?” Otou-san asks, poking his head through the small gap at the threshold.

“Welcome home Jirou-oji-san!” Lee waves.

“Otou-san! It’s coat and stair time!” Naruto yells. “You gotta come in right now, believe it!”

“Hang on, I need to get the door unstuck first!” Otou-san replies. “Hm...maybe if I unscrewed the hinges...”

Okaa-san gives a weak chuckle. “Mayu-chan, go pick up your coat before it rips or your father dismantles the front door.”

Otou-san smiles at her when she opens the door properly, coat in hand. “I’m home, Mayu.”

“Welcome back, Otou-san.”

The smile drops slightly when he gets a good look at her, and he reaches out to brush a thumb over her temple. “Ouch. How’d this happen?”

She winces slightly at the pressure. “I fainted at the Academy. It’s...a long story.”

Otou-san gives her a searching look, then turns that stare on the interior of the front hall, where her raincoat and towel block the entrances to the kitchen and the living room.

He closes the front door behind him and lays her winter coat back at the bottom of the threshold. “Well, I’d better hear it sooner rather than later, hadn’t I?”

She’s a little proud that she’s able to say, “I freaked out at the sight of the weapon that killed me in my past life” on the third try without blubbering.

Much.

Okaa-san drums her fingers on her arm. “How can you be sure that these weapons are from your world? After all, your world had katana and kunai and other weapons that are found here— maybe it’s just that our technology is beginning to catch up to yours.”

She shrugs in Otou-san’s hug. “I’d believe that if they weren’t so...so modern. This world relies on c-chakra a lot, which makes bladed weapons and thrown projectiles much more viable than they are in mine. We haven’t even been taught about the existence of g-firearms at the Academy before today. Yet, despite that, those things are just as if not more advanced than the ones from my world, with no precedent.”

“Yeah!” Naruto nods decisively. “What’s a preceden?”

“It’s when certain things have to happen first for something to exist.” Okaa-san explains. “Like you need to have eggs if you want to make omelette rice.”

Otou-san hums. “You’ve never spoken to anyone else about your past life, have you Mayu?”

She shakes her head. “Only you lot and Gai-sensei. And I wouldn’t tell anyone about...those things.”

“Where is Gai-sensei, anyway?” Naruto asks.

“He has a mission today.” Okaa-san says. “He dropped by earlier to say he would be back in time for training tomorrow morning.”

Lee nods, smile small and happy.

Then he leans against Okaa-san, arms crossed. “So if the guns are from Mayu’s past life, but Mayu-chan didn’t have anything to do with their creation, how did they get from that world to here?”

She purses her lips. She’d like to know that herself.

Naruto closes his eyes and tilts his head from side to side, like a dog trying to listen to something. “Hmmm...a wizard...no, a mindreader...Iwa nin...hmm...Mayu’s evil twin...magic teleporting frog...”

She snorts and opens her mouth—

Then freezes.

“Naruto, what did you just say?”

Naruto blinks. “Magic teleporting frog?”

“Wh-no! Before that!” She says, mind whirring a million miles a minute.

There’s a moment as Naruto’s lips work soundlessly, going back through what he said.

Then his eyes widen and he rears back. “What the heck?! Mayu—you—you have an evil twin and never told me?!”

“You think I would’ve noticed if that was the case.” Okaa-san mutters.

“Kaa-san!” She yelps, flustered. “And no I don’t have an evil twin—that’s not the point!”

“What is it?” Lee leans around Okaa-san to stare curiously at her.

“It’s just an idea, I don’t have any proof for it or anything,” She gently digs her teeth into her lower lip. “But when Naruto said ‘evil twin’, it made me think what if—what if there is someone out there who was like me? What if I’m not the only one who was reborn into this world from mine?”

The room goes still.

“If such a person did exist, why would they do this?” Otou-san asks carefully. “Why manufacture and export these weapons, if there’s no real need for them here?”

She shrugs. “Money? Power, maybe? I-I don’t know, I have no idea. It’s just— nothing else makes sense, does it?”

There’s a sharp rap at the front door.

They all freeze.

“Dear. Gai said he wouldn’t be back from his mission today until tomorrow morning, didn’t he.” Okaa-san says.

Otou-san stands, one hand on his bokken. “Yes. He did.”

He moves towards the door, while Okaa-sama pushes them behind her, hissing, “Go upstairs to the door of our bedroom. Do not come down until we call you.”

After a moment, her towel and coats are lobbed up after them.

The zip on her winter coat smacks her in the lip.

She pulls it off her head in time to hear her father faintly say, “...Nara-sama! What an unexpected surprise!”

“Geez, Nara-sama’s such a drag. Nara-san will do just fine.” The lazy drawl floats up to them as Naruto leans forward to try and get a glimpse of Shikamaru’s dad, towel wrapped around his shoulders like a cape.

“Thank you very much, Nara-san. Would you like to come in?” Okaa-sama asks as Lee fidgets with the zipper on her raincoat.

“Nah, we’ll be quick. Shikamaru here just wanted to check with your kid, see if this whole shrine thing tomorrow is still going on.”

“Oh! Well we haven’t discussed that with her yet, so we’ll call her down.” She only gets a brief moment to panic before Okaa-san is raising her voice. “Mayu-chan! It’s one of your friends from the Academy for you!”

She shoves the coat behind her and traipses down the stairs.

“Hello Nara-san,” She says, a fake smile plastered across her face. “Hey Shika.”

“Yo.” Shikamaru replies.

His eyes still have that assessing quality from earlier.

He knows nothing, she tells herself. He hasn’t figured out you’re reincarnated, he doesn’t know there’s anything to figure out, please, please Sanji don’t let him figure anything out.

“So,” Shikamaru says suddenly, startling her. “How’s the head? It’d be troublesome if you woke up tomorrow too hurt to fix up the shrines.”

She touches the bruised area. “It’s a little sore, but I should be fine for tomorrow!”

“Are you sure, Mayu?” Okaa-san squeezes her shoulders. “We could always reschedule for next weekend if you aren’t up for it.”

“But Okaaa-saaan,” There’s a series of thumps as Naruto slides down the stairs one step at a time. “We’ve been waiting ages for this! Oh, hi Shika!”

“Hey Naruto.” Shikamaru raises a hand.

“I’m sure,” She nods her head. “Plus I think they’re eager for the shrines to finally be done too.”

Okaa-san’s expression goes tight and unamused, like it always does when they interact with her without it being an emergency, or Mayu asking permission first.

It’s not quite fair because Mayu suspects they can’t really help it, and it’s not really anything too direct, just flashes of emotion that are a little too intense to be her own.

She’s just glad they’re excited about the shrines too.

Then Shikamaru says, almost too casually, “The guns really spooked you earlier, huh?”

She can’t help it. She flinches.

Otou-san lays a hand over one of Okaa-san’s on her shoulder. “Ah, that...we were just discussing it with Mayu. We’re sorry for any worry her behavior caused, but...well...”

“But what?” Nara-san asks, one eyebrow raised.

Otou-san looks down, face twisted as if contemplating a difficult memory. “We don’t...enjoy talking about the journey from our homeland to Konohagakure. The...trials...we all had to weather. We’re just thankful we all made it here in one piece.”

Okaa-san nods and returns Otou-san’s doting smile, pretending to discreetly dab away tears with the sleeves of her kimono.

Shikamaru’s eyes widen slightly and he shifts, scratching his cheek and looking away.

It’s all she can do to not gape at the scene.

Are they—are they insinuating that her reaction to those things stems from their escape from Iron to hide her reincarnation? To the Jounin Squad Leader of Konoha and his son, no less?

She gives silent thanks to Franky and Robin.

She has the best parents in this world. The best.

“So the fact that the manufacturer of these weapons is based in Yukigakure comes as no surprise to you?” Nara-san says.

Otou-san jolts behind her.

Then after a moment, he sags, scrubbing one hand over his face. “You know, it really doesn’t. Does Yamanaka-san know?”

“He knows.” Nara-san nods, seemingly disinterested. He does a much better job of faking it compared to Shikamaru.

She glances back and forth between them, but there’s nothing on either man’s face that gives away any meaning to these non-sequiturs.

At least Shikamaru’s calculating look isn’t directed at her anymore.

Instead, he squints at Naruto. “Why are you wearing a towel?”

“Uh.” Naruto says, eyes darting to her.

Usopp help.

“We...were deconstructing a pillow fort! In my room.” She lies.

“A pillow what?” Shikamaru asks, eyes...oddly bright.

“A pillow fort! It’s where you take a whole load of pillows and blankets and towels and stuff and you create a fort using chairs and tables, or a chair and your bed if you have a raised one.” She explains.

Shikamaru nods, like this is only logical, though his expression has gotten even more weirdly intense for some reason. “Is that so? What do you do once you’ve built it?”

She shrugs. “It depends. You can just hang out in it and tell stories? Or nap?”

A slow, almost vicious smile spreads across Shikamaru’s face. He turns it upwards towards his father, who’s gone a worrying shade of grey and is staring at her like she’s pronounced a curse on his clan.

“Why.” Nara-san says, tone despairing. “Why would you tell him something like that exists?”

She shuffles so she’s partially hidden behind Otou-san. “...Sorry.”

Nara-san sighs, tugging gently on Shikamaru’s ponytail. “C’mon you. Let’s get going before you get any more ideas.”

“Actually, Nara-san, I have a quick question.” Okaa-san steps forward. “Would it—would it be acceptable for me to write to my relatives in Water Country? Perhaps inviting one or two of them over?”

She blinks up at her mother. She knows she has relatives in Water, but this is the first she’s heard about potentially meeting them.

Nara-san cocks his head to the side. “Writing a letter isn’t a crime. Inviting them here, to this village, for a visit...that’s more dicey.”

Okaa-san nods, chewing on her lower lip. “I suspected as much. Is that the same for all of Fire Country, or...? Ideally, we wouldn’t want to travel very far from Konoha.”

“Ideally.” Nara-san sighs again. “There are some villages nearby that might suit your needs. For now, I’d just put in a request for mail delivery at the mission desk. They can help you with any questions you have from there.”

“Thank you very much, Nara-san.” Okaa-san bows at the waist. “I hope you and Shikamaru-kun have a pleasant afternoon.”

“You too.” Nara-san bobs his head and takes Shikamaru by the shoulder. “C'mon, say goodbye.”

“See ya.” Shikamaru says, inclining his head like his father before the pair of them begin to walk away.

“See you tomorrow, Shika!” Naruto calls.

“Remember to wear clothes you don’t mind getting paint on!” She yells after him.

Shikamaru raises a hand in acknowledgement, before turning back to say something to his father.

Otou-san lets out a heavy sigh once the door is closed. “Right. Lee, could you bring the coats down with you?”

Lee obligingly comes down the stairs with both coats in his arms. “Are your relatives coming to stay, Chie-oba-san?”

“Maybe not to stay.” Okaa-san says. “But hopefully my brother Ikei and cousin Mei will get to meet you all.”

“All? You mean me, an’ Lee an’ Gai-sensei get to come with?” Naruto pipes up as he finishes setting down the towel, a huge grin spreading across his face.

Okaa-san beams and gathers the two of them into a hug. “Of course. I can’t let them leave without introducing them to three of my four favorite boys, can I?”

Lee’s eyes are shining and Naruto’s grinning and giggling. Otou-san leans over Okaa-san’s shoulder, pouting playfully. “Then what am I?”

“You’re the fourth favorite, of course.” Okaa-san teases, planting a kiss on Otou-san’s cheek.

Her mother turns and shoots her a small smile. “I also thought we could ask them it they’d met anyone who behaves...well, like you do. We’re a large merchant family spread all over, so it’s not unlikely that one of them has met someone in your circumstances without knowing it.”

(Snake Summoner Mayu AU, because I have no control over my brain.)

It is bitterly cold in the mountains.

Ikuchi should not be here. She should be nesting down in a warm cave, belly fat and full, sleeping til the spring.

But the summoner has commanded she undertake this mission. It is a task beneath the summoner’s dignity, but the client is willing to pay good coin for its completion.

Enter the samurai nest. Find the hatchling of the client’s kin. Kill it.

She had been selected for her pale scales, her small size, her venom.

The summoner had remarked these made her perfect for infiltrating the snowy mountains the nest was hidden in with a cruel smile.

Manda is all too willing to swallow even small snakes like her who refuse or question the summoner’s commands.

She does not wish to be eaten yet.

So she slithers through another snowdrift, desperately praying to the Sage that she won’t freeze before she even arrives.

She stopped being able to see a while ago.

Her tongue feels like it will snap clean off if she tastes the icy air too frequently.

Only the faintest sensation of vibrations keeps her from curling in on herself to preserve whatever smidgeon of warmth she has left.

Only that makes her push her frozen muscles to keep going, heading towards rather than away as her instincts feebly hiss.

Where there are vibrations, there are humans.

Where there are humans, there is heat.

She will not freeze if there is heat.

She will not die on this Sage-forsaken mountain. She will not.

She forces herself to crawl forwards.

Ikuchi is so so cold.

She stiffly twines herself up and around something not-alive, slithering cautiously over new terrain with tiny bumps in it.

There is no snow anymore, thank the Sage, but it is still so so cold.

She cannot even taste anything anymore.

Her head bumps into something else. She noses it carefully.

Not-alive. Safe to climb.

She sluggishly heaves herself up the not-alive thing.

There are faint vibrations coming from above her. She needs to get to the vibrations. She’ll die if she can’t get to them.

If she could just heave herself over the edge of this not-alive thing—

Heat.

Lovely, warm, delicious heat.

She twines eagerly around the source, burrowing her head under where it is hottest, letting out a hiss of contentment as the cold burns out of her blood.

Aaaah.

The heat source rises and falls rhythmically, a gentle thud-thud-thud vibration filling her senses.

She shuts her eyes and lets herself drift in the warmth.

She is jostled awake when the heat source lets out a snuffly noise and wriggles slightly before settling.

As the heat source has saved her from dying an ignoble death via cold, she graciously decides not to bite it to stop it from moving.

Instead she retracts her head from the warmest spot to get a good feel for what exactly her new warmth generator is.

Her tongue flickers out over soft, faintly downy skin, over small features that scrunch up at the inspection before smoothing back out in sleep.

It’s a human hatchling. A very young one at that, barely a few days out of the egg at her best guess. Or was it weeks for humans? Or maybe months?

Humans are strange, Ikuchi reflects.

They’re so vulnerable for so long early in life, it’s a miracle that any of them even survive to adulthood.

That’s probably why the adult humans that are running around are so hardy. The summoner is proof enough of that.

Though other adult humans calling for the deaths of hatchlings, like the client, probably don’t help survival rates much.

Wait.

The client.

The mission.

Ikuchi pokes her head over the edge of the hatchling’s resting place and tastes the air.

A bigger human, also asleep.

Stuffy cloth.

Tatami mats.

Sharp metal. Lots and lots of sharp metal.

She retreats back down and noses over the hatchling, searching its cloth coverings until she finds what she was hoping she wouldn’t.

A stylized bird with wings raised, its beak piercing its own breast to draw blood.

The symbol of the client and his kin. The kin whose hatchling she’s supposed to kill.

Well.

Hm.

She settles her head back down in the warmest spot, burrowing under where the hatchling’s head meets its body and tries to think.

It’s...regrettable that the hatchling is what saved her from an icy death. But she has a job to do. A mission to complete.

It’s not like she particularly wants to do it. No, no, if she had it her way, she’d gladly bite the summoner and the client for good measure. Teach them for sending her to die in the cold for worthless bits of round metal.

But she has to complete the mission. Manda will eat her for failing the summoner otherwise.

All it will take is one tiny little bite. The hatchling will only suffer for a few moments.

...Okay, more like several minutes. It’s not like it’s her fault the venom will take longer because the hatchling is so big. She’s not a constrictor!

She flicks her tongue out irritably.

One bite.

Just one bite is all it would take.

Then she could be back in the caves with her brothers and sisters and never have to think about warm hatchlings and their weak, pathetic, pitiful death throes ever again.

The hatchling above her makes a little cooing noise and shifts above her, covering more of her coils in warmth as it squirms.

It even considerately takes some of its weight off of where she was beginning to feel a bit squashed.

She finds it distinctly annoying that this tiny human she’s supposed to kill has done more for her than her own summoner.

At this rate, she’d rather throw her lot in with it instead of continuing to—

Wait.

She pokes her head up again, considering the hatchling.

...Below average chakra reserves. But those should increase as it grows, right?

And she could help guide its growth.

Make it a much better summoner than her current one, or even his student.

Perhaps most importantly, she knows the Great Snake Sage will not let Manda eat her if she is contracted to another summoner.

He had thrown a tantrum when the summoner’s student had turned on him, but the Sage had not let him eat those snakes contracted to the student. She will be safe from his wrath.

In the caves at least. If they meet on the field of battle, she’ll be fair game.

But even one safe haven from Manda is better than none.

The scroll is heavy and difficult to unravel for a snake her size.

Still, she gets it open and props it up against the wall of the hatchling’s resting place.

After ensuring that the right segment is where she needs it to be, she twists around to look at the tiny human,

The hatchling looks back at her.

Its dark grey eyes do not focus on her, moving with the restless blindness of the very young.

“I am Ikuchi of Ryuichi Cave.” She hisses softly. “By your blood on this contract, we will become bonded. Do you accept?”

The hatchling gurgles.

Close enough.

She carefully pricks the hatchling’s finger with her lower fangs.

It wouldn’t do to poison her summoner.

Not yet anyway.

The hatchling whines, wiggling weakly as if that would make the pain stop. Blood beads on the appendage, bright red and hot.

She coils her tail around the tiny, soft wrist, and guides it to drag against the blank space on the parchment.

A rush of chakra.

A sensation not unlike a successful shed, useless dead scales sloughing away for gleaming new ones to take their place.

Ikuchi hisses in pleasure.

Ah. Her summoner is crying.

Squalling really, red-faced and snotty-nosed, thoroughly miserable.

The bleeding on its hand hasn’t stopped. It looks like it might have gotten worse, actually.

Ikuchi racks her brain for what little she knows about human physiology and healing.

Did the bastard summoner say it was saliva or excrement that slowed bleeding?

A shadow falls over the resting place.

She coils back on the chest of her summoner, ready to strike at the intruder. Did the client already send another assassin, despite paying the bastard summoner? Was betrayal planned from the beginning?

The adult human above them has its teeth bared in threat, eyes furious yet frightened.

“Get the hell away from my daughter.” It snarls, drawing a short blade from its midsection.

What?

Oh.

It’s trying to defend its hatchling.

Ikuchi reluctantly slithers off of her summoner’s chest and does her best to look small and unassuming.

The human scoops up her summoner in a flash, one hand cradling its head while the other bares the blade, ready to strike at any moment. It’s an instinct she approves of, even if it is completely pointless in this particular instance.

She curls up in the warm spot her summoner left behind, and announces, “I intend no permanent harm to the hatchling. It is contracted to me, and in my best interests to protect it.”

The human’s face creases in confusion, before its eyes land on the contract scroll.

Color drains from its face.

Huh. Ikuchi hadn’t known humans other than the bastard summoner could look like that. Maybe it was indicative of an emotion the bastard summoner felt all the time.

Thank you for the ask, dear anon!

They are crushing on him SO HARD, you don't even KNOW

The crush hasn't lessened as Lee, Mayu and Naruto have grown older. If anything, it’s increased in intensity as he’s basically become a co-parent to the pair of them, and so it gets easier for Jirou and Chie to daydream about him just staying forever instead of leaving in the evenings.

Surprisingly, Lee wraps his head around the idea of reincarnation from another world the easiest.

“It’s like when children at the Orphanage are adopted.” He explains blithely. “The parents who take them away give them new names, so you can’t ask to visit or see how Shinpachi is doing anymore, but the person who was known as Shinpachi still exists. He just has a new life with a new name somewhere far away.”

There’s a moment of contemplative and slightly horrified silence.

“Huh.” She says. “I-I guess it is kinda like that. I am Mayu, I just...remember being someone else before that. Somewhere very, very different.”

“Mayu—” Her mother pinches the bridge of her nose. “How-how do you know that this—this other world even exists?”

Well, she’d known they’d need proof to believe her, one way or another. Hopefully this will be complex enough that it should suffice.

She takes a deep breath.

«It’s the eye of the tiger, it’s the will of the fight, risin’ up to the challenge of our rival. And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night, and he’s watching us all with the eeeeeyyyyyyeee—of the tiger.»

Naruto grins. “Hey, it’s the singy thing!”

Lee gives a little round of applause. “You have a very nice voice, Mayu-chan!”

She tries not to blush and fails miserably.

Gai-sensei nods. “A most youthful tune, Mayu-chan. But do the sounds have any meaning?”

“Wait just a moment.”

All eyes turn to her father, whose head is hanging down, hair bracketing his eyes.

“Those sounds...aren’t they...”

She feels a drop of sweat slide down the back of her neck. Otou-san is the second son of a samurai clan after all; it’s no surprise that he can recognize a foreign language just by hear—

“They’re the noises you used to make when you were a little baby!!” Her father yells, pointing a dramatic finger at her.

“NO!!” She yells back, cheeks aflame. “Well, actually, yes, they kinda were, but they weren’t just baby noises!!”

Okaa-san gasps, pressing a hand to her cheek. “Dear, I can’t believe I couldn’t remember! You were so sweet, Mayu-chan, always going ‘aa dun uda’sta oo’.”

“That’s because I was trying to say «I don’t understand you»!” She groans, covering her eyes. “I didn’t understand this language back then! I just wanted to know what was going on!”

“Hey, hey, Mayu’s Tou-san,” Naruto says, eyes sparkling with mischief. “What was Mayu’s first word?”

Her father exhales and strokes his chin while looking off into the distance with a nostalgic twinkle in his eye. “Well, let’s see. She would’ve been about twenty months old or so—”

“IS NOW REALLY THE TIME FOR THIS STORY?!” She cuts in desperately. “I’m trying to prove the existence of another world by showing that I know a language that no one in this world has ever heard of and is far too insane for anyone with a brain to have made up!”

“Insane?” Says Lee, tilting his head in confusion.

“English is the pirate of languages.” She mutters darkly. “It goes around and beats up other languages and steals their words.”

“Is there anything about your past life that’s not related to pirates?!” Okaa-san asks, exasperation evident in her tone.

“I like pirates.” She says, hurt.

Her mother shoots her an unamused look. “Ketsugi Mayu...”

She holds up her hands in surrender. “Pirates were kinda mythical in my past life by the time I was alive. There were historical ones, but people romanticized them a lot. Like ninja.”

“What?! How dare they, that’s really rude, believe it!” Naruto fumes, crossing his arms. “...Kaa-san, what’s rom-an-ti-sized mean anyway?”

“It means they make up stories about them to make them seem...nicer.” Okaa-san explains. “Usually by pretending they aren’t as violent as they really are.”

“Oh.” Naruto thinks about this. “That’s dumb. Ninja are already cool, they don’t need to be nice.”

“Pirates are cooler.” She says.

“They are not—”

“Don’t start.” Her mother says in her scary week-long-ban-from-cooking voice.

“Yes Okaa-san.” They chorus.

“But wait.” Lee’s now frowning. “If the only ninja are historical, then how did countries in your past life defend themselves?”

“With armies of soldiers. Normal ones.” She replies. “ Though those might be replaced by flying robot drones by now. There used to be ninja in Japan—may still be even if only in name—but there wasn’t anything like chakra in my past life, so we developed technologically to fight each other instead. Now the world’s kinda in a stalemate peace because we’ve developed so far that the planet will become unable to support human life if we ever go all out.”

Lee stares at her, then drops his head, fists trembling in his lap.

Gai-sensei presses a hand to his shoulder. “Lee.”

She grows alarmed as tears begin to drip off of her friend’s face. Oh shit, she hadn’t meant to insult his dream. “Hey, Lee—”

“Mayu-chan.” His voice is surprisingly steady. “Did you mean everything you said? You aren’t making anything up?”

She hesitates but shakes her head, mouth twisting in consternation. “Yes. I did mean it. Lee, I’m sorry—”

Suddenly his arms shoot up in the air, fists still clenched. When he raises his head, his tears are sliding around a wide and dazzling grin.

“There’s a world of ninja without chakra.” He whispers, tone awed. “They don’t need chakra to become strong. To become ninja.”

Gai-sensei beams back and ruffles Lee’s hair into a haystack. “Of course! A youthful spirit and the willingness to work hard are what truly make a ninja!”

“And our Lee has that in spades.” Okaa-san says fondly, smoothing some of the now-haystack back into place. “You’ll be a fine ninja, I’m sure of it.”

Lee sniffs noisily. “Gai-sensei, Chie-oba-san...!”

“Yeah!” Naruto throws his arm over Lee’s shoulders. “An’ then you an’ me an’ Mayu-chan are gonna be on a kickass ninja team together, believe it!”

“I’m gonna be a pirate.” She interjects staunchly.

Naruto pouts at her for a moment, before he brightens again. “Fine then! Sakura-chan can be our third teammate, and Mayu’ll be the pirate mascot!”

“Sakura-chan?” Lee cries eagerly.

“Pirate mascot?!” She echoes indignantly.

Naruto sticks his tongue out at her triumphantly while her father and Gai-sensei turn away to muffle what sounds suspiciously like laughter.

She folds her arms and scowls at the stair in front of her while her mother pats her head consolingly.

Otou-san manages to get his chuckles under control enough to place a hand upon her and Lee’s shoulders. “We’ll always be very proud of you all, whether you’re a pirate mascot—” He fails to hide his snickering under her disapproving gaze, “—or a ninja. We just want you to be happy.”

“Jirou-oji-san!” Lee sniffs, eyes refilling with tears.

It takes another five minutes to get Lee and Gai-sensei to stop crying and hugging everyone in reach.

This is only exacerbated by the fact that her parents lose all rational sense and begin blushing and stuttering helplessly when they’re caught in Gai-sensei’s embrace.

Once everyone’s calmed down a bit, Naruto turns to her again. “So if this world was a story in your past life, does that mean you know the future, or any super cool jutsus?”

“No.” She says. “Because I never read that comic. I only ever read One Piece and argued with idiots who tried to say that that comic was better, which it obviously wasn’t.”

Her mother rolls her eyes at her as she lies, “I don’t even remember what that series was called, or any of the characters from it.”

Naruto narrows his eyes at her. “Then how’d you know you were here?” He fires back.

She stares at him as placidly as possible. He’s her best friend in this world—practically her brother in all but name. Lee is too, and Gai-sensei may as well be a third parent by this point.

She’s afraid of dying again, but she thinks that if it were for this family right here, her family, she’d face it with the kind of smile that only a D could muster.

She refuses to sentence Naruto to a miserable life of second-guessing and unearned guilt over things that he couldn’t possibly control.

Not this time.

Usopp, Nami and Robin give her the conviction to make this lie believable.

“The Hokage Monument.” She tells them smoothly. “It was in the background of almost every panel that idiots who liked the comic would try to show me. I didn’t remember where I recognized it from until I was about four years old though.”

Naruto doesn’t quite look convinced at first, but his expression becomes more accepting as he mulls it over.

Lee, bless him, just nods along trustingly.

Okaa-san tilts her head and stares at her with unnerving scrutiny.

Otou-san touches her mother’s arm, an eyebrow raised in concern, only for his wife to shake her head almost absent-mindedly.

Gai-sensei’s nose twitches.

She holds her breath.

His face breaks out into his usual beam. “I see! So the Will of Fire blazes strongly even in other worlds!”

She exhales, sending a mental thank you to the Rational Trio. “Yes. Any other questions?”

“Did you have a family in your past life?” Lee asks.

She flinches.

“Ah.” Lee’s smile is sad and understanding. “It’s okay if you didn’t—”

“I know it is.” She cuts in, grin feeling stilted. “It’s just—they weren’t anything to special. My Dad was a businessman and pretty strict. My Mum was a housewife and very spiritual. Kinda boring overall.”

Lee nods again, though he looks a little confused.

Okaa-san and Otou-san look...hurt.

She wants to hug them, but there’s a little part of her that whispers that doing so would be a betrayal. She forces herself to turn to a nicer topic.

“I did have a little brother, Harp.” She smiles to herself. “He’s a good kid, you guys would’ve loved him. He’s wizard at doing presentations and performances and things like that, really makes it easy to understand and believe what he’s saying, you know? He’s gonna be a famous actor when he grows up, or a politician, some really great speaker once—”

She freezes. “Shit.”

“Language!” Okaa-san says, but she barely hears her, knuckles white as her nails dig into her knees.

“I didn’t make a will.” She rasps. “I never made—and now they’ll get it all. They’ll take everything, and he’ll still be trapped.”

“Who will take everything?” Otou-san says, steely-eyed and serious. “Mayu, was someone you were related to threatening your family?”

She shakes her head. “Not—not threatening, exactly. S’just.” She makes an abortive movement with her hands. “Living with Mum and Dad was...not good. For me or Harp. They never got on with each other, and both of them were disappointed in us in their own way—anyway.”

“No, why were they disappointed?” Okaa-san says, eyes blazing. “I want to know what they thought was wrong with my little girl.”

“Okaa-san—” She tries to say, flattery and embarrassment warring inside her.

“Nothing’s wrong with Mayu-chan!” Lee interrupts, little chest puffed out. “She’s fine the way she is!”

“Lee—”

“Except that she does curry too spicy.” Naruto cuts in. “And argues with the Academy teachers a lot. But that’s not disappointing, believe it!”

She’s torn between the overwhelming desire to kick him in the shins and give him a great big hug.

Gai-sensei gives what, for him, counts as a discrete cough. “While I’m sure we can agree that Mayu-chan is one of the farthest things from disappointing there is, I believe you were in the process of explaining your dilemma?”

“Right.” She tries to will her cheeks to stop burning.

“Well, I had some money saved up so I could try to get Harp out—hire a good lawyer and see if, while Mum and Dad’s divorce was finalized, I could win custody so he’d get to live with me.”

“What’s divorce?” Lee asks.

“It’s when two people who are married decide they don’t want to be married anymore.” She explains. “So they go to a court of law to make it so they officially aren’t, and each person gets part of what they both owned.”

Naruto gasps, like the idea is somehow shocking to him. To be fair to him, the adults look equally scandalized, so she guesses that’s not exactly a common practice here. “You can do that?! But why? I thought married people were supposed to love each other forever.”

“Usually they do.” She says wearily. “But sometimes people fall out of love, or one person is hurt by the other, or both misunderstand the person they got married to. Dad thought a woman like my Mum would be very business-focused like he wanted. Mum thought a man like my Dad would be very spiritually enlightened like she wanted.”

Naruto looks confused but considering, so she moves on.

“Anyway, I had a lot of money saved up, but because I died without leaving anything that said how I wanted it to be used, Mum and Dad will take all of it, or at least argue over who should get the most of it in the divorce.” She clenches her fists. “And Harp’ll never see a penny.”

“Mayu-chan.” Naruto’s voice wavers slightly. “Did you not love your parents?”

For an awful moment, she’s struck by the paralyzing urge to say “No”.

Then the horror and guilt settle in her gut again like undercooked food and make her feel like she’s going to choke on bile.

“Wh—of course I loved them!” She sputters indignantly. “They were my Mum and Dad. You’ve got to love your Mum and Dad.”

“It’s okay if you didn’t!” Naruto holds up his hands placatingly. “They just don’t sound very nice! You said that they said you were a disappointment! And you didn’t want your little brother to be with them!”

He and Lee are staring at her wide-eyed, as if waiting for her to snap at them again. The same way Naruto and Kiba look around Sakura these days.

She takes a deep breath and tries to make her voice softer, gentler. “I’m sorry for yelling. It’s just, sometimes, you can love someone and know when they’re not very good at something, or in a position that they and other people aren’t happy they’re in. I did love my Mum and Dad, but they are the last people in that world I’d trust with a kid. It wasn’t their fault, but I thought if I could get Harp out, let him grow up happy—”

She shakes her head, worrying the scar on her lower lip.

She’d promised him she’d get him out.

She’d promised.

“How old were you?” Her father asks, voice low. “When...?”

She can’t bring herself to look at him, but he sounds weary down to his very bones.

“I was twenty years old.” She says to the stair in front of her.

“Is that.” Her mother hesitates for a moment. “Is that an old age to die at? Among the people of that world.”

She makes a face. “Nah. I’d been an adult for two years in the eyes of the law, but most people in my past life could expect to live until their lates eighties or nineties before dying of natural causes.”

She hears Gai-sensei whisper “late eighties or nineties” to himself in a tone filled with something like wonder.

It’s that wonder which spurs her to look up and say, “In fact, if you manage to live to your hundredth birthday, the Queen sends you a card wishing you a happy birthday and congratulating you. I had a friend whose great grandma got one.”

Only Gai-sensei looks as amazed by this information as she’d hoped they’d all be. Lee’s trying to muster up the same enthusiasm as their teacher, but he can’t quite. Naruto looks more confused than anything.

Otou-san and Okaa-san are just staring at her like they don’t recognize her.

It hurts too much to hold their gaze.

“How’d you die?” Naruto asks. “Were you fighting a bad guy?”

She rubs the back of her neck. “Not really. A man broke into the flat. I grabbed a knife. He freaked out and his gun went off. He said it was an accident.”

She hisses the last word with all the venom it deserves.

She doesn’t understand anymore why the One Piece anime tried to censor Belle-mere’s death by changing it from a headshot to a bullet to the chest.

A headshot is quick and painless, at least.

She’s so caught up in her own memories that she doesn’t hear her father’s question. “Pardon?”

“What was your name?” Otou-san’s voice is soft and understanding, even though his eyes are pitying.

“...The girl who died was called Tamara Kaur. Her friends called her Tammy or Tim-Tam for short.” She says, a mournful grin on her face. “My name is Ketsugi Mayu. I’ll be in your care, if you’ll have me.”

The quiet that follows this statement, half joke and half plea, is enough to make whatever hopes she was still desperately clinging to crumble like a sandcastle in the face of the tide.

There aren’t many more questions after that.

Aside from the pointed conversation that began with “so if the person Naruto mentioned really was a comic character, then who was the home invader?” and ended with her exasperated mother asking “What do you mean, you ‘accidentally created divinity’?”

She winces. “Kinda that? I just, I was praying to them for normal stuff, and then that day I prayed for help with cutting the lamb and ended up with an entire meal I didn’t remember cooking.”

Okaa-san stares at her for a long moment before burying her head in her hands. She makes a noise Mayu thinks might be a sob.

Otou-san pats her back awkwardly and shoots her what she thinks is meant to be a reassuring smile. “Your Kaa-san’s fine. She just...needs a moment.”

“So it was Sanji?” Naruto whispers to her.

She nods rapidly.

Naruto’s face splits into a grin so wide his eyes almost close. “Awesome.”

“I know.” She whispers back, hardly able to keep from smiling herself.

Okaa-san sends her to turn off all the taps and hang her clothes back up upstairs.

She supposes she has wasted enough water for one day.

She blinks in the mid-afternoon sun when she opens the door to her bedroom, ignoring the masks that are all but pressed against the shut window more out of habit at this point.

She feels too drained to even feel alarmed by their proximity to her home. Talking about her Mum and Dad always did that to her, even when she was in the same world as them.

A phantom hunger pang pierces her stomach.

She shudders at the memory. Oh Luffy, she hopes Harp got out quickly, that he didn’t have to grow up on meals that were either pigswill or denied to him entirely.

He’d be...what, eighteen, nineteen by now?

Reading about Sanji and the adventures of the Straw Hats used to help her get through those punishments.

She sends a prayer to them now that Harp didn’t have to learn how to do that himself.

Otou-san, Okaa-san, and Gai-sensei are discussing something in low, serious voices when she comes back downstairs.

They quiet down for a bit when she steps between Lee and Naruto to get to the kitchen.

When she returns to the hallway, Gai-sensei pats her shoulder with a little too much force, shooting her a megawatt beam and a thumbs up.

“Do not worry, Jirou-san, Chie-san! I am certain that there will be no cause for concern for yourselves or Mayu-chan!”

Otou-san heaves a sigh. “We have every faith in you. It’s just—”

Okaa-san lays a hand on Gai-sensei’s arm. “Please, Gai.”

He solemnly takes her hand in one of his own, reaching out to grab her father’s arm with the other. “Everything will be as it always is. I swear it to you.”

The adults’ eyes seem to glisten as they stare at each other.

She glances at Naruto and Lee, eyebrow raised.

Naruto gives a quizzical shrug. Lee’s almost vibrating as he stares at their parents, eyes wide.

She hates to break up the moment, but there’s an elephant in the room that needs addressing.

She coughs a little. “Um, Okaa-sama, Otou-sama?”

Her parents look over at her, shoulders stiffening.

She worries the scar on her lower lip. “I, ah, just wanted to say, that if you need some time to-to process what I’ve told you, and you don’t want me a-around for it, I can get out of the house, go somewhere else for as long as you need me to—”

Otou-san and Okaa-san stare at her, expressions of pure horror on their faces.

Shit, has she really overstepped by that much? “O-or if you don’t want me to come back, I could always try to find o-other living arrangements for myself—”

“YOU FOOL!”

The slap to the back of her head isn’t nearly as painful as most of the blows she’s weathered during training, but the sheer surprise of the attack has her clutching it and looking up in bewilderment.

Gai-sensei looks madder than she’s ever seen him.

“...Or I could leave the village entirely?” She meekly suggests, unsure of what to say to appease her teacher’s anger.

“And when did anyone ever say they wanted you to leave?!” Gai-sensei booms.

What?

She blinks in confusion. “But I’m not who you thought I was, I have—”

“Are you Ketsugi Mayu?” Her mother asks, voice drier than an over-baked cake.

“Yes—”

“And do you enjoying cooking and feeding people?” Okaa-san walks towards her and leans down.

“Well, yes, but—”

“And you have an obsession with pirates that leads you to act without thinking a lot?” Her mother reaches out and grabs her cheeks.

“It’s not an obsession—” She feebly tries to argue through pursed lips.

“Then you are my daughter.” Okaa-san says. “And you are going to stay right here where I can see you, and we are going to lay down some ground rules about contacting strange deities, do you hear me young lady?!”

She’s so alarmed by the sight of angry tears gathering in her mother’s eyes that she just nods her head as best as she can in this grip.

Okaa-san lets out a little sob and then she’s being enveloped in a crushing hug by both of her parents.

Otou-san murmurs, “Our family stays together, damn what anyone may think. Even if we have enemies on all sides, the Ketsugi clan will weather any blows. Didn’t we already tell you that?”

Then she feels Lee and Naruto’s little arms squeezing her from behind, and the gentle weight that means Gai-sensei has joined the hug too.

“Please don’t go Mayu.” Naruto says, sounding small and scared. “Please.”

The Parentals.

A sketch of Ketsugi Chie and Ketsugi Jirou from But I Like One Piece.

Chie was the eldest daughter of a promient shipping merchant family in Kiri and currently works as a server in a teahouse. Jirou was the second son of the Ketsugi clan of Iron, and is now a low level accountant. Their marriage was arranged, but they managed to bond and fall in love over their mutual interests in swordplay and martial arts.

They have acquired three children through various means, and are both secretly in love with the sensei they think is their eldest’s long-lost father, much to their youngest’s chagrin.

But will he ever return their feelings??