ANGER. FEAR. LOSS. GRIEF.

Heavy breaths wracked the boy’s small frame as he wrapped his arms around himself in a desperate attempt to ground himself. He couldn’t move – couldn’t muster the strength to push himself to his feet. He doubted his legs would support him even if he did manage it. It was like he’d been punched in the gut and all the air had been knocked out of his lungs.

The emotions he currently felt were not his own but they were suffocating him all the same. A wave of raw emotion had crashed over him and knocked him from his feet. It was so overwhelming he could barely breathe. He just wanted to shrink away – wanted it all to stop because it wasn’t fair. He couldn’t control it. He couldn’t pick and choose when he could sense what he’d been told were Force Echoes and the ability was so rare that none of the Order really knew how to deal with him.

Not even Master Yoda possessed Psychometry. It wasn’t something that could be learned but young Cal Kestis had been born with the ability all the same and it had only grown stronger as he grew and became more attuned to the Force.

One day it might be a useful ability but for now it was just a burden.

It was too quiet. He knew that for certain. Even though Amara had taken Issa out into the city to gather supplies, still there should have been something besides the silence. Perhaps Cal laughing at something in a holovid. Or the sound of him tinkering with some of the loose parts Gav keeps in the little shared workshop. Or, even more likely, the boy trying to parkour through the cargo hold again. 

Instead, there is complete silence, and that cues Gavril that something is very wrong.

He gets up from his desk in his room and goes down the steps to the conference room and then down the other steps to the cargo hold.

With no sign of the boy there, he proceeds through the little hallway and knocks at the door of Issa and Cal’s shared room.

He always keeps an ear to the ground. Or rather, to the various Imperial transmissions, and specifically those that pass between the Inquisitors and their Master. For one such as him with a life as he has lived, for having been considered by the Emperor to be not only a threat but an admitted rival, it is wise to do so. To know if he has been discovered. To know if his operations will be disturbed.

The most recent transmission, while it seemingly had nothing to do with him, did pique his interest. Two Inquisitors dispatched to a nearby scrap planet called Bracca. As loathe as he is to return to such a place, there is only one reason that springs to mind for such a missive to be sent.

Either a hidden Jedi or a force-user had been discovered and they were to be dealt with in short order.

Were it a Jedi, it would certainly be no loss to him. The Jedi had their chance and they had, unsurprisingly, squandered it. Beyond that, he had extended a hand to them. Had tried to save at least some from their dismal fate and he had been rebuked, scorned, and imprisoned.

Were it simply a force-user, however… That could prove useful.

Redirecting his ship, he soon descends towards the surface of Bracca. Only to see a TIE-Interceptor and troop carrier. A carrier for Purge troopers.

And a chase. 

He could leave before he was noticed, however…

He swoops in closer, throwing the ship onto autopilot and rushing to the cargo bay. With the ramp dropping, he leans out of the ship and calls out to the one being chased, one hand outstretched as the other holds to the mechanism for the ramp.

“I’m...worried, Master Kenobi.” The padawan admitted with a soft sigh. “What I can do. It’s dangerous.”

It didn’t help that psychomtry was such a rare ability amongst Jedi that he’d had little training in controlling it. He wouldn’t have changed his Master for anything, but in an ideal world, Tapal would have had more knowledge of pyschometry. He’d always been good at helping him through the episodes though.

“I fought an Inquisitor. I touched her lightsaber and…it was horrible. I felt such anger and pain and hate as if they were my own emotions. It was overwhelming. I’m worried that one day, something else will happen and the feelings will overwhelm me completely. That I’ll fall to the Dark Side.”

these concerns are not unfounded,   and obi - wan wishes that he could do more to help.    he is wary of cal’s presence here,   not out of anything that has to do with the other jedi himself,   but due to his own shortcomings,   the fear that he will only fail this boy as absolutely as he had anakin.    

“   the light is strong in you,   knight kestis,   ”      he says,   expression carefully placid.    they have been meditating together most evenings,   and in truth,   he isn’t sure what he’ll do when cal leaves.    it has been a great relief to have a friend here,   another jedi.    he would like to believe that he will be content in the knowledge that cal is still out there,   but he cannot convince himself of it.      “   i have utmost faith in you.   ”

He doesn’t like the idea. Already he has lost one padawan to this war. Really, he hadn’t even been able to see to Nadhar’s training. Not properly. They had reassigned the padawan to a different Jedi when his duties left the training to the wayside.

And yet, now the Council––despite his protests––has seen fit to assign him another padawan, Cal Kestis, and assured him that this time would be different.

The boy is bright to be certain, and he is talented without question. In fact, he is perhaps one of the most gifted of the younglings who have been admitted in recent years where his studies are concerned. 

No, it isn’t the boy’s qualifications or skills that he questions but his own ability to teach. 

Regardless of his doubts, the Council had spoken and, as such, he has little choice. Pushing his doubts from his mind, he walks to where he is to meet the boy and sees him already there, waiting for him.

That bright smile for which he’s known so easily appears, as though his dark thoughts were far gone, he waves and calls out to greet the young one as he approaches.

Cal had thought he was safe.

After Master Skywalker’s Temple was burned to the ground and the majority of the students were killed, the Jedi had gone into hiding - blamed himself, he supposed. A wooden beam had knocked the boy out, but against the odds, he survived. By the time he awoke, however, he was alone.

He knew it was no longer safe for Jedi.

With Luke gone and the birth of Kylo Ren, the First Order became grew in strength and they were hunting - whether to use them or kill them, Cal didn’t want to find out.

He had been careful but apparently not careful enough. Perhaps someone had seen him…

It didn’t really matter how they had found him, but they had.

“Get back. I know how to use this,” he warned him, his voice wavering slightly and he did know. To some extent.

“If I intended harm to you, do you not think I could have inflicted it before you even knew of my presence?” he questions, voice quiet and even. 

Slowly and carefully, he raises his hands up and to his sides, showing that they are empty and devoid of weapons.

Guilt was a funny thing.

It wasn’t something the Jedi preached – it was an emotion too close to those that led to the dark side. It still existed though even if the Order liked to pretend it didn’t. The Order was gone though and the young Jedi had more things causing him to feel more guilt than ever. His master was gone – he’d died to protect him. The Jedi were dead – most of them at least – and he was still there.

The latest addition was Prauf. The guy who had taken him under his wing when Cal first arrived on Bracca. Even after discovering he was a Jedi, Prauf hadn’t turned him in.

And now he was gone.

Like the Order. Like Jaro.

Survivor’s guilt wasn’t something that was easy to deal with. If he didn’t confront it soon, it probably would eat him alive.

“Are you worried about me, Maul?”

“I’m not worried.... It’s just an observation.” Maul admitted as he looked back at Cal. He was fully aware of the Jedi’s teachings and it wasn’t exactly the most healthy outlook on life.... Not that the Sith was either considering how Maul himself turned out and jumping directly to anger once someone as much as mentioned Savage. Or frankly even sugested there was something the Zabrak felt guilty for. If that even was the right word to use for someone like Maul. “I asume it wasn’t all to high on the list of things that the Jedi wanted to talk about with the younglings huh?” He added with a raised eyebrow.

To say Quebec and his brothers of the 13th Attack Battalion was used to it just being them and General Tapal wouldn’t be much of a lie, they never thought things would change and that Tapal would get a padawan. When their General first broke the news to them, that was the first time they ever heard the word padawan and after the word was explained they were actually excited about getting a new member of their battalion, especially since the new member was close to their age.

Quebec paced back and forth with his datapad in his hands as he awaited the padawan. He stopped pacing in the port area when a ship landed nearby. The ramp lowered as the door opened. Quebec clipped his datapad to his belt and hurried over, his helmet clipped to the other side of his belt.

“Cal Kestis, I presume? My name is CC-7575, but everyone calls me Quebec or Commander. General Tapal is in a meeting right now but i’ll be showing you around before you can meet him.”