Stick around for the after party, he told Cas, instead of killing him.
"Took you long enough to find me," he told Cas. He wanted to hurl his emotions at them. He wanted to be heard.
He wanted them to hear him. He wanted to vent the only twisted, ugly emotions he has left. His nihilism.
The thing is, he's not wrong about Chuck. Amara, by all appearances (the face caressing, the torture) appears to have been a person that caused Lucifer incredible hurt and pain.
(His abuser? Perhaps, but one who is encouraged to move past her crimes of destroying-to-get-God’s-attention. Who is allowed to change and offered forgiveness for her crimes!)
Chuck said anything to get Lucifer on his side, used him in the fight, and then when Amara ripped Lucifer free of Cas, Chuck and Amara left Lucifer in the ocean. Cas was probably the first stability he'd had in thousands of years, perhaps the only roommate he'd ever tolerated (liked?). And Cas ACTUALLY gray-rock tolerated him in return.
Cas said of Lucifer: "He mostly leaves me alone."
That Cas was Lucifer's most stable "family" is a pretty horrific thought. And on the heels of being torn from Cas and discarded by Chuck, Lucifer becomes a little bit like Crowley in s10.
In s10 after role-playing "Sal" on a cross-country roadtrip ("Bitch." "Jerk."), Crowley was SUPER OPEN to Rowena, even when she was using him. He wanted family THAT badly.
That's where we find Lucifer here. He's being Lucifer, of course, doing Lucifer things, as he looks for "worship" to fill the void. But it's still rooted in PAIN.
He's actually talking about himself, too. "DESPERATE TO FILL THE VOID." It's the black hole of grief again. The deep dark nothing that can't be filled with food, with sex, not even with WORSHIP.
But another reading is that he was waiting... for Cas and the boys. "Took you long enough."
He wanted to vent and be understood by THEM specifically.
It's NIHILISM. The echo of, "I just want it to be over." This is what sets him up to get the idea that creating JACK will fill his own void. (Not the reason anyone should have a CHILD, but he's not exactly alone in that.)
ANYWAY. Lucifer said nothing mattered, but after cosplaying his rock star, he went after a philanthropist.
In theory, someone with a lot of power... and a lot of purpose.
Celebrities.... Captains of industry....
What Lucifer really wanted was unconditional love from his father.
At first, Lucifer's bored by the presidential position. It's just more politics, which ihe is neither GOOD at nor LIKES. (Remember, he made CAS do that part in s11...)
Lucifer was never all that popular OR good at politics OR people OR fitting in. (As he'll later complain about to Anael in s13.)
Lucifer pretends to be Jeff in every day, indulging in human things he's never indulged in before:
And doing this, Lucifer stumbles upon a purpose, but it's actually just... borrowing Kelly's purpose:
And so comes the idea of having a captive loved one, a son who will fill the narcissistic wound in Lucifer.
After conceiving/deciding to conceive Jack, he starts taking more aggressive steps to both keep his current position AND take out threats... Sam and Dean.
A pre-emptive elimination of the thorns in his side, then.
And poor Kelly, trying to give her boyfriend "the benefit of the doubt."
Sometimes we gets weird when he's spun out. He's STRESSED.
And okay, the Bible burning is so cliche, but I’m going to put that into the "sons have the ability to destroy the father's book" category, kinda akin to Cas blowing up the library and sending pages flying when he gets his grace back in s10.
Side note/ /Say what you will, but I love that it's Sam and Rowena magicking Lucifer's ass as a team, while Dean and Cas hold the doors open:
pay no attention to how stupid their egg looks guys~
DEAN: "Sam! ... Rowena, now!"
And I feel like together, they're working to try to break Jack's destiny, like how this mirror breaks here:
And in the next episodes, I feel like Jack actually takes weird-control of the story, ensuring his emergence by literally taking away everyone's competence and luck while in utero.
Funnily enough (and maybe somewhat alarmingly), Jack echoes this theme of "finding purpose" when talking about Kelly.
"I hope someday... I'll have her sense of purpose."
MRS KLINE: I know it’s nutty, but, Jack here kind of looks like her, see? [She holds up the book again]
JACK: I don’t know. But, I hope some day to have a little of her courage and purpose. I didn’t mean to intrude. [JACK stands to leave]
