🎣 A shallow seeker sinks horizontally, exhibiting a natural kicking action to attract a variety of fish.🐟 ME: Chaotic SPN/SPNwin meta writer who’s been sharing my thoughts since 2023. I'm a little contrary (in good fun), and I enjoy in-world meta shenanigans. STUFF:👬 pro-DeanCas (I have eyes) // 🤩 Mary stan //⭐ Jack stan // 🕮 Sam / Donatello / Metatron-coded
I'm Shal. I watched SPN off and on as a teen, but I didn’t join Tumblr or the fandom until late 2022, when I was bedridden due to a heart condition.
That’s when I started reading fics like american oracle by @handsliketruth & @whiskeyjuniper, The Black Dog Ache by @winchester-reload, and Redux by @valleydean... and I was hooked. Ficlets, meta, shitposts, the whole nine. (I'm still obsessed with all of these stories, if you care.)
⭐ Shal's fave re-readable Dean-Cas fics ⭐
(I need to update this so badly, but you folks keep poking me.)
Anyway, I also have my bookmarks but they are forever a mess, and I keep my macaroni trash comfort porn in there, so read at your own risk.
Anyway, I'm happy to say that my heart condition is much more stable now, and I’m no longer bedridden, but I’m still on Tumblr and still having an amazing time!
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discord @ shallowseeker
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TAGGING / WARNINGS
I’m not anti-anything, but I have a real soft spot for imperfect characters. If they come across as too polished or boring, I love digging into their flaws and exploring their Achilles' heels. (For example, I’ve paralleled Lisa Braden’s struggle with understanding grief against Jody Mills’s deeper, lived understanding of it.)
Anything I think could be challenging or a bit of a downer, I tag with #complex at the beginning—#complex john, #complex sam, #complex dean, and so on.
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META
The meta-organization will go here... eventually. (I'm working on a #shal spn rewatch.)
Over the past couple of years, I’ve written a lot of opinions, some of which people still request. My meta tends to focus on later SPN seasons, with deep dives into Jack Kline—aiming to add variety to the ecosystem by highlighting the real, complicated Jack over the "fanon (toddler) stereotype."
A few people have called me TFW-positive, and I genuinely love Team Free Will, even when I'm mentally wringing their necks. My core focus is on Sam, Dean, Castiel, Jack, Mary, and Rowena/the MacLeod family.
Side Goals: @spnwin-reader @wheretheloveisstored
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FICS
I post my fics on Ao3 under shallowseeker, and the new Tumblr page for them is here. (I post a lot of rapid-fire ficlets and ideas in my Tumblr posts, too.)
I write to improve my cognitive dysfunction, and I’m fascinated by religion and natural phenomena (avalanches, sinkholes, etc). My writing style has been described as chaotic, random, and weird—"like one long manic episode."
PSA: My meta thoughts = / = my fic. Sometimes fic is just me goofing off, or horny drivel, or melt-in-your-mouth cotton candy. Don't expect that My Thoughts (TM) will align with it. I reserve the right to be lame and incomprehensible. TY~
= O N G O I N G =
For your crimes against the most high (5 of 14) = "Cas isn't real."
= C O M P L E T E D =
Proper adornment (1/1) = Cas gets obsessed with Dean + jewelry
The facts of life (and death) (1/?) = Chuck VS Symbiote
Blackout on the eastern seaboard (2/2) = Victory sex tango
Truth & despair (15/15) = Dean misremembers the confession
Mirror, mirror (1/1) = The empty peeks into the bunker
I will not be diminished (1/1) = Chuck VS Jack
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OTHER STUFF
👬 pro-DeanCas (I have eyes) // 🤩 Mary stan //⭐ Jack stan // 📚 Sam / Donatello / Metatron-coded (and was told by a friend: Kevin Tran-coded)
My username @shallowseeker is a type of fishing lure, so I thought a Dean and Jack fishing theme would fit perfectly this time around!
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i guess this very well could be cas trying to break into zach’s mini fantasy fortress
he’s trying to warn dean smith, which just would only serve to make dean more and more paranoid (a voice telling him not to trust anyone? to run? i mean, yikes)
this culminates in cas breaking into the world but majorly incognito, as a very “inconspicuous” character, maybe a janitor
cas ambushes the admin assistant, and apologizes profusely for the ‘almost-miss’
all the while fucking up the lids of dean smith’s coffee
so when dean smith inevitably takes a drink, there’s -predictably- a huge (very hot) mess
cas positions himself perfectly, as the closet building mgmnt to dean’s office, and as soon as he hears the pained yelp, he’s on his way to clean up the coffee catastrophe
he doesn’t want to spook dean ofc or blow his own cover, so mostly he’s collecting details on what might be keeping dean here (as it turns out: bobby, ellen, jo).
Oh Janitor Cas is definitely getting surprise-kissed, and he’s like mmmmmmmmm? leaning pleasantly into it before he REMEMBERS
so Cas ofc breaks it off and Dean Smith panics, thinking he just dangerously outed himself and misread everything, Cas tries to soothe the distress with a half-truth, like:
“Dean, if you really knew me, you wouldn’t want this…”
And that somehow backfires, bc Dean Smith gets all starry-eyed, “So come to the hospital with me tomorrow, and we’ll grab lunch after… get to know each other…”
Horrified, she whisks the body away and puts him in a suspended Sleeping Beauty state to buy herself some time.
But the surprise is that Sam's ghost is hanging out there like, "OH MY GOD YOU KILLED ME?"
And Rowena is like
😬😬😬😬😬😬😬 "NOT ON PURPOSE, SAMUEL I AM GOING TO FIX THIS"
ANYWAY, when Dean gets suspicious, her cover story is that she and Sam are working a witchcraft case together, but her falsetto is T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E and we all know how bad her acting is... and Dean's not buying it.
So Sam musters his ghost powers and crackles into the receiver, all staticky, saying they need some time because—because “Think of it like a sock on the door, okay?”
....
So now Rowena is locked in her apartment with Sam's corpse and ghost-Sam, pretending she and Sam are on some kind of wild, passionate, romantic getaway.
#Sam and Rowena Weekend at Bernie's type situation with this via @kerryweaverlesbian
Yes!!!!
Side note: Transporting Sam's huge, gangly body must be such a logistics nightmare.
Side side note: I like to think that during her brainstorming sessions, she dresses Sam in better outfits and at one point paints his face with both sparkly butterflies and a curly black moustache.
Sam isn't even mad at this point, he's died and come back so many times. The cause being a relatively friendly witch who clearly wants him to get back to being alive and also the only "deal" is not mentioning this to Dean ever for both their sakes?
Sure he's down.
Plus, being a ghost is kind of even a little bit fun without all of the apocalyptic nonsense hanging over his head. He floats Rowena's spell ingredients into the pot. He makes the room cold at inconvenient times.
It isn't until he gets back, and realized that Dean thinks he and Rowena are a thing, that it really sets in.
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#spn 14x02#spn 14x19#spn season 14#THEY ARE THE SAME#at the molten core anyway#very unfortunate for the both of them actually#jack dean#jack has qualities of everyone too but this is a painful one
Cas finds the suggestion mildly maddening. From what little he can see, the journal is written in Enochian too—his mother tongue, as it were.
“Not yet,” he says. “Sam told me how little he’s been sleeping, and this is Enochian. Unless it contains a viable way to track Jack, there’s no reason to wake him for something I can read myself.”
He steps closer and flicks two fingers upward. “Hold it up.”
Dean looks dubious, but does as told.
Cas gets as close as he can, until his eyes begin to sting. After a few pages, he says, “According to this, the collar is worn around the neck.”
Dean nods gravely. “Great. Huge breakthrough. Next page says shoes go on feet?”
Heat pricks unpleasantly at the back of Cas’s neck. “If you’re finished.”
Dean gives him an innocent look and lifts the journal higher. “Floor’s yours, Professor.”
Cas resists the urge to clear his throat. “Loosely translated: once activated, it binds to supernatural kinetic output and acts as a kind of tap, restricting that output whenever it couples with heightened emotion.”
“Meaning?”
Cas tries to frame it in human terms. “Think of it as less a collar and more a muzzle. It restricts your… mojo, unless you remain precisely sundered from your emotional state.”
Dean frowns at that. “So… a Jedi teacher’s wet dream.”
“Turn the page.”
I have not known peace since @shallowseeker worded "Zachariah is angel detention" because, every couple of days, my brain pictures this little Cas trueform, sulking at a school desk (half plopped on it) while Zachariah is monologuing at the board.
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one of my favorite genres of destiel is when they're arguing/bickering and sam agrees with one of them and then they both immediately drop the argument to team up on him
cas: that's now how the keurig works, dean, you're going to break it
dean: i'm not going to break it just let me do it
cas: dean-
cas: give me the cup, cas
cas: it won't work
sam: cas is right
dean&cas:
sam:
dean&cas:
sam:
cas: dean makes the best cup of coffee in the world, sam
sam: i-
cas: and frankly, you should be a little more grateful
sam: what
cas: i mean, how many cups of coffee has he made you over the course of your life?
sam: cas-
cas: and another thing-
Jack talking about Sleeping Beauty in the beginning of s14 and then nearly becoming Sleeping Beauty at the end of s14:
Back at the bunker, Jack is in the process of leaving, having left a goodbye note on his bed. As he walks towards the stairs, he overhears Cas. Cas and Jules are making a spell as Jack opens the door. On the bed is the girl."
Jack: Who is that?
Cas: It’s a girl. She’s been enchanted.
Jack: Like Sleeping Beauty.
And then 14x19:
Cas: Even after hearing what I said, you want to keep Jack sealed in a living death?
BITING YOU ALL
In Sleeping Beauty, the princess is cursed to fall into a deep, eternal slumber, a state often described as a "living death." While not a direct phrase from the original fairy tales, this concept resonates deeply with the myth.
The curse she endures is not a physical death, but rather a suspension between life and death, where she remains alive yet trapped in a death-like sleep. This state of limbo has long been associated with the idea of being "alive but not truly living," which echoes the emotional weight of the tale. It is in this tension between life and death that the heart of the myth resides—a princess poised on the edge of both, awaiting to be awakened from a suspended existence.
Horrified, she whisks the body away and puts him in a suspended Sleeping Beauty state to buy herself some time.
But the surprise is that Sam's ghost is hanging out there like, "OH MY GOD YOU KILLED ME?"
And Rowena is like
😬😬😬😬😬😬😬 "NOT ON PURPOSE, SAMUEL I AM GOING TO FIX THIS"
ANYWAY, when Dean gets suspicious, her cover story is that she and Sam are working a witchcraft case together, but her falsetto is T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E and we all know how bad her acting is... and Dean's not buying it.
So Sam musters his ghost powers and crackles into the receiver, all staticky, saying they need some time because—because “Think of it like a sock on the door, okay?”
....
So now Rowena is locked in her apartment with Sam's corpse and ghost-Sam, pretending she and Sam are on some kind of wild, passionate, romantic getaway.
#Sam and Rowena Weekend at Bernie's type situation with this via @kerryweaverlesbian
Yes!!!!
Side note: Transporting Sam's huge, gangly body must be such a logistics nightmare.
Side side note: I like to think that during her brainstorming sessions, she dresses Sam in better outfits and at one point paints his face with both sparkly butterflies and a curly black moustache.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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oh—there’s something in season 10 with how cas just wants to be an angel and dean likes the disease it’s about not feeling anything
and there’s something about crowley disliking the girl dean is trying not to have emotions for, and crowley telling dean, something something, “rolling stones, no distractions.” and then you have cas telling hannah, “only mission, no distractions.”
disinhibition (demon dean) and inhibition (angelic cas) are two sides of the same coin of emotional numbing huh
and the thing is, those both handcuff free will—a lobotomy isn’t freedom, and neither is a roofie
