My parents 💖💖💖💖

subaru-kun subaru-kun subaru-kun subaru-kun subaru-kun subaru-kun I love love love love love love you

(don’t you think he’s cute?)

Rem finding out what telling him he's a hero turned him into.

Ram finding out everything that went wrong at the Sanctuary, that she's been holding against Subaru all this time, was all almost entirely Roswaal's fault.

Beatrice, who never moved on from That Person, finding out they never even existed.

All the non-Emilia Camp members comparing the past and the present wondering what the fuck happened. And then finding out.

Bonus

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NATSUKI SUBARU, MY BELOVED, MY LOVE, BEST BOY, THE MOST AMAZING CHARACTER, THE GREATEST, SUBARUUUUU

Please have Pridebaru as the comic relief no one takes seriously, and Slothbaru trying to help in between showing everyone pictures of his kids for the 15th time today

I’m gonna assume that these IF!Barus got sent back in time with all their. Issues.

Ayamatsu: They’ve kinda got to take him seriously enough to make sure that he doesn’t Do That again, and it’s not really comic relief anymore if he’s Right There and not just something out of a bad fanfiction. But — yeah, they might be able to. They’ve just got to get it through his thick skull that the world he is in is real and populated by real people whom he should be treating with respect. This isn’t something that would happen immediately, and they’d probably need to keep him under lock and key, but they might be able to figure it out eventually.

Oboreru: They capture him and release him into a maximum-security cell decorated with a large bed, plenty of blankets and pillows, and an army of soldiers right outside the door. If they can make Subaru feel that this room is safe and secure, then they can eventually use it as an anchor from which he can be escorted out and slowly readjust to the world around him. Wrath!Baru main problem is that he is this paranoid mess of a man that is constantly afraid of being betrayed, and his main threat to them is his Pleiades organization. If they can put him in a position where he can’t leverage his criminal organization against them (because it doesn’t exist), then they don’t have to worry about him killing them and can focus on helping him recover. And if they can construct an environment that is quiet, secure, and predictable, then recovery may indeed be possible.

Sloth:IF: Honestly Sloth!Baru never even really did anything wrong, his only real sin was that he could never come to terms with what happened that day he left. Even if he had never gone back in time they could help him: just get him in therapy to confront his inner demons and realize that 1) the Witch Cult was not his fault and 2) him running to the other side of the world to live a long, safe, and happy life with Rem is EXACTLY what Emilia would have wanted him to do, and he doesn’t have to feel guilty about keeping himself safe. The main issue is honestly that if he goes back in time he loses his wife and kids and — the grief from that would legitimately break him.

Kasaneru: I actually think that things can still be fixed in canon!Kasaneru. Nobody is dead, and so things can still be fixed, because healing is always possible so long as you’re not dead yet. I actually really like the idea of Greed!Emilia learning about RBD and — instead of letting it break her further — finally finding the strength to grow and break free of her chains on her own, leading everyone against Subaru so that he can finally be forcibly resigned and put to rest. In a time-travel scenario, meanwhile, their main issue is keeping Greed!Baru away from anything he can use to kill himself and making sure someone is watching him at all times as they force-feed him therapy about the value of his life. Constant surveillance and plenty of security measures and they indeed might manage to pull it off. —And also they’d need to destroy his connection with Echidna, if possible.

Probably more Greed!Baru than Natchuki Subawu, but like. Natchuki Subawu was very much an echo of Greed!Baru in a lot of ways.

He was an echo of ALL the Sin Route Subarus really, in a way that was established through his actual actions (declaring himself the Strongest Existence, a total lack of empathy for and understanding of other people’s POVs, taking the easy route to victory (because yeah, reliance on RBD has been consistently framed as the easy way out), forcing a smile in a mirror before turning to cheerfully greet Emilia after Returning By Death, cheating through supernatural means to gain intimate relationships with other people and constructing the Perfect Natsuki Subaru that appeals to them, specifically—) and symbolically (wishing the main antagonist a Happy Birthday during the final confrontation, leading an organization of mercenaries named after the Pleiades constellation + Halibel + Cecilus + arguably the whole Vollachia alliance in general, coparenting a daughter named Spica with Rem + Halibel again, abusing RBD to get the perfect ending + Roswaal’s explicit approval, the connection with both Louis Arneb and the Corridor of Memories—) to the point where it’s just. It’s so blatant. It’s horrifying, lol. I’m really looking forward to seeing how THAT gets resolved. (Fucking hell the next arc opened up with him being sealed away by the exact same spell as the Witch of Envy, Jesus that was pointed.)