#karnissposting

Szarkai. Bizarre scars. Apparent Eillistraean traits. Speculative biology stuff (both sexual and non-sexual). Gender stuff. His name. His trauma repeating itself. You can just... keep digging and finding new things for a long, long time, and you can start to build fairly elaborate theories, before you even really start stretching.

Two years after the defeat of the Absolute, Astarion has made his way with Tav in the Underdark, trying to do right by some 7,000 vampire spawn--but between the looming threat of the Drow, and his own disorganization, it's starting to drive him crazy. Desperate for a bit of time to himself, he takes on a routine reconnaissance mission; but his plans go awry when he runs into an old enemy with questionable motives. Each wary of the other, but each in dire need, he and Kar'niss manage to strike a deal--but Astarion may (or may not) live to regret it.

*incoherent screeching*

Do YOU want to read a completed, 25k-word Astarion-Kar'niss buddy dramedy??? Sure you do. Get in there, champ

I really wanted to get this done on the 7th when @obisooth declared International Kar'niss Day, but at that point it still needed another edit pass and a beta read, unforch. Oh well there's always next year

If you're not familiar with the DnD lore, drow get turned into driders when they fail a test of Lolth, or (to her perception) insult or defy her in some way. So Kar'niss was already a second-class citizen born into a high-control religious group, and due to an unknown incident, was forcibly outcast from that group and cursed with a form that denotes total disgrace.

So he was thrown out, rejected by his goddess, forced into solitude, and suddenly along comes a new perceived goddess who has use for him? It makes total sense why he was easy prey for another cult--especially with his uhhhh obvious mental problems.

(Interesting side note: the drider transformation is specifically said not to affect one's mind, aside from probable amnesia. So Kar'niss went insane for natural psychological reasons, not magical ones.)

I've seen soooo many people talk about how they specifically avoid killing him, but man is it going to suck when he wakes up. Lantern is gone, shadow curse is gone, cult is gone, he can't hear the Absolute any more (if he ever could? IDK) and he's alone and still crazy and back to square zero. Now what.

God, this guy's VA must have had the single funnest day at the office ever. All the growling and snorting and screeching and HERETIIIIICS!!!!! He barely sounds human half the time and that's before they added the weird croaking overlay that I think is supposed to represent whatever's happening in his creepy-ass... spidery... lungs. (I don't know spider anatomy ok)

It ended up at almost 25k words and seven chapters, and I blasted it out in exactly two weeks. I think I worked out most of the logistical stuff as I went, so at this point, it really just needs a pass or two for clarity and style--and even then, really only on the last couple chapters or so, because I have a horrible habit of wanting nice pretty sentences during a first draft.