#kaayafaye

When I saw people talk about their dreams, I felt so inadequate because I had no dream. They would talk about being a famous celebrity, have swanky houses, run a billion-dollar business; and me? Well I just wanted to laugh, to feel safe, and have enough to buy that expensive lipstick or phone without feeling guilty about it later. When asked, I would think about how I could be a business person, or a famous poet, or a sought-for content writer. But honestly, deep down in me, there was no zest for achieving these superlative dreams. I would just close my eyes and watch myself sitting in the veranda of a small house by this seashore. I would just watch myself run with a puppy on the beach while in the background the sun set. No one in the place would know me except my closest neighbours. We would spend the festivals together by exchanging gifts, dishes, or say smiles? Not even in a single dream was I wearing a pant-suit or a 60K bodycon dress. I was in comfortable casuals. And then, last week, I realised it. This is my dream. To be happy, in a serene place, with people who love me, near a seashore that would always inspire me to write beautiful poems. Just because it isn’t about being filthy rich or insanely famous does not mean it isn’t a dream. Do not let the simplicity of your vision confuse you. Do not, even for a day, think you are dreamless. Dreams can mean different things for different people. When someone says dream “big”, you get to decide what “big” means to you. Is it money, is it love, is it happiness, is it a sense of safety, is it freedom? Whatever it may be; however simple it may sound; it is your dream. Go after it and achieve it. Don’t let anyone tell you how small your vision is. As long as it means something important to you, it is important. #kaayafaye #dream #ihaveadream #peptalk https://www.instagram.com/p/B3RXszTnaZs/?igshid=zu2gttf04kjb

When I decide to chase my dreams, When I muster the courage to swim upstream, May my mind never get in the way of my heart. When I attempt to do my best, And force quieten the critic in me to rest, May my mind never get in the way of my heart. When I rejoice in the efforts I make, Doing what I have always wanted - to create, to write, to dance, to paint; May my mind never get in the way of my heart. When I set my foot off the comfort zone, And nervously take a step into an exciting unknown, May my mind never get in the way of my heart. When I dare to believe in myself, To be hopeful about tomorrow And feel worthy of love and wealth, May my mind never get in the way of my heart. #kaayafaye #englishpoetry #poemsaboutlife #positivethoughts #followyourheart #daretodream #believeinyourself #you'reworthy #poetryquotes #positivequotes #positivethoughts #iwish #dream #ihaveadream #peptalk https://www.instagram.com/p/B3ZYuLPn-8s/?igshid=rt5cdxk4t8s9

But isn't it true? In the grand scheme of things, you're nobody. No one knows you, know one knows who you are, from where you belong - you could be anyone! You could do what you want to do. Remember how people play the game "What would you do if you were invisible?" and many answer they would dance like crazy, they would get out of the house more often, they would play, they would run like a child, they would be superheros helping others, they would do all the things they are afraid to do in front of people. But who are these people that stare at you when you wear that dark lipstick and walk nonchalantly? Who are these people who care too much about what color goes with your complexion? Who are these people that gawk when you eat half a burger in one bite just to win a bet? They don't even know you. You are a nobody to them. You might as well do what you want. You might as well speak your mind. You might as well wear whatever color or shade you like. When you get tired of pleasing them. When you get tired of making sense of those stares. When you stop finding the proof of your being in others and truly embrace the boon of being a nobody, you achieve freedom to be yourself. You are a speck of dust. That speck of dust might as well sparkle. #kaayafaye #peptalk #iamnobody #believeinyou #beyou #beyourself https://www.instagram.com/p/B3bUZ6LHM4C/?igshid=bbx716p4fdhg

When I wake up each morning, My ears ache for earphones, My eyes crave for the latest posts. But I am determined. I do not want to fill the silence, With songs playing on the speakers, Or a thousand posts on Instagram. I want to stand on the balcony And breathe the fresh air, Listen to the neighbor's bike start, A nearby temple's bell ring, The cry of a pet cat two buildings away, The chirping of the birds, That sit on the tree outside my balcony. When the thoughts come pouring into my head, I do not wish to silence them. I want to let them flow ceaselessly, And observe them unbiased. When the morning comes again, I do not want to fill the silence, But embrace it Without resistance. #kaayafaye #poetry #englishpoetry #silencepoems #igpoems #igpoets https://www.instagram.com/p/B3mTsd4ngnq/?igshid=n1vnzlj82usq

Closing my eyes. #kaayafaye #poetryquotes #poetry #shortquotes #quotes #eyesquotes #igpoems #igpoets #igers #igdaily https://www.instagram.com/p/B3pIi4qH5ov/?igshid=5uakmn3hww29

I’d rather trace my fingers Through the map You drew on me last time Than wait for you To miss them again. I’d rather mark My own territories Than wait for you To want to touch And redraw on me. I’d kiss my own fingers And call my own name I’d pleasure my own self And keep doing it over All the same. Read the full article

“Teen din hue aaye Durga apni Kaki ke saath na baithi tu.” the old woman was braiding her hair. “ke hua chhori? Kal tak toh chupp na baith sake thi, aaj itni gumsum kaise? Durga smiled and turned to look at her Kaki. Her dewy eyes filled the old woman’s heart with sorrow. After a very long time in life, she was questioning her work and what she made Durga do. “It is a part of our life. This is who we are. Do not be ashamed of yourself.” is all she taught every girl in the house, including her soft-hearted, kind Durga. She had ready herself for being blamed, accused, punished, and even banishment but never for the tears of her beloved Durga. She had not prepared herself for benevolence and forgiveness. She held Durga close and caressed her forehead until she fell asleep curled in the grey dupatta of her Kaki. She remembered the day Hassan had sold Durga to her. “Her parents cannot afford raising another girl, Ambika. But, look at her. She promises to grow up in beauty and grace.” “Kya daam lagaoge?” “60 me doonga. Lena ho toh lo nahi toh aur bhi kothe hai.” “Je toh ghana moongho daam btayo se, Hassan.” “Nijjar daal toh sahi, chhori ghani futari dikhe.” Ambika bought Durga was the price Hassan had asked for. He is a fool, she had thought later that day, I could have given him double the price for a girl like her. Durga’s complexion, eyes, and the color of her hair were just like of the man who Ambika had once known. Her love for him had faded away or rather she had always known that women like her are not to fall in love - part of the duty. But, what was wrong with keeping a bit of it? She raised her teaching how to acquit herself, how to move gracefully, how to charm men with her voice, how to sound irresistible, and so on. She forgot to teach Durga how to guard her heart. The girl always wore her heart on sleeves. When she was feeding the birds, dancing for men, singing, talking to a friend, kneading her Kaki’s legs, all this time. I wish I had taught her how to keep her fragile heart safe from being nipped at and torn. Her soft hair were twisted in the fingers of Ambika’s fingers just like her fate and Ambika could not help but feel both guilt and compassion. Her most beloved girl was mournful - mournful for a man who wasn’t even thinking of her and probably would never do. I hope he never does, not again. I cannot forget those beautiful eyes, honest smile, and polite gestures. I will never be able to forget those lips I kissed. Inappropriate! Inappropriate! Inappropriate! Get a hold on your thoughts, you have wives, family, and people who you are accountable to. It cannot be justified. This is anyway not love. It’s …it’s infatuation for sure. I will forget her in a day or a two. Such childish attitude does not suit a Raja like me. Her thin, long fingers will be forgotten and their touch, definitely will wash away from mine. The colour of her pink lips forever faded from my eyes. Her olive skin will no more tempt me to touch it, feel it, and run my hands along that curvaceous waist. Her light voice will be mute upon my deaf ears and I will never again think of listening to her long at length. It is not love, certainly not. This is lust. I only want what others want from a kanchani like her. After all, what she had for me was a part of her job. It was all very fake and make-believe. Of course, it was. But, then why I doesn’t it feel so then? Well, I am Raja. I am the ruler. I have the power, I can certainly find out. Madri! Ji, hukum? “Go to the girl’s house who was here 3 days before and give her this letter.” Ji, hukum. “Make sure you give the letter to the girl and not to anyone else.” Ji, hukum. Madri took the letter from his master and walked away in his gray robe. Madri? I have never seen you wear gray ever before. Is something special today? “No, sarkar.” he smiled looking at Raja sa compassionately. “Rest as I go give your letter to her.” Read the full article