#justneededtorant

But only because I start to realize when Zach is at work, I don't have anyone to hang out with. I kind of dismissed myself from other people a while ago. I generally picked shady people to hang out with, but still. My best friends are my cats, and Zach. Not that I'm complaining that my boyfriend happens to be my best friend. But I also wish I had a girl that I could sit with and bullshit about whatever came to mind at the present time. I miss having that so much. But the last girl I had broke my heart by making me just some convenient option, someone to only go to when no one else had the time. Someone who shit talked me because it made her feel better, someone who gave up everything to fit in with the rest of the world.

 I almost cried...not because I was really sad but because I cry when I get aggravated and how disrespectful is that? My mom bought those for me because I don't have anyone else to buy me chocolates and you're just going to snatch them out of my hands because you think I'm overweight and don't want me to eat them... go suck a fuck, dad. 

Tomorrow seems like a good beach day. Maybe I'll break out my favorite medium? Watercolors! :D

As one of those actors that goes around as characters and takes pictures with people. 1.) It would just be fun 2.) I could put it on applications for better acting jobs. My dad was totally okay with it and supportive, but my mom (rather rudely) was like, "What actors do you know that worked at Disneyland? Be realistic here." And she wonders why dad is my favorite parent.

I seriously don't know where to begin. Why wouldn't you tell me? I'm your best friend. I'm your girl friend. Shouldn't i be one of the first people to know that you might be moving back to Georgia. Also why would you do this to me? You haven't even told me. I had to go on facebook to know about this. This. This exact fucking reason is why i don't trust people or actually like someone. I always get fucked over. You swore that you wouldn't be the one to end things that you think it would be me. You wouldn't even be willing to do long distance for me. I'm not worth it! God this is all a big fucking waste of time man. What did i fucken do to deserve this. I always lose the people that i love. Why? I just want to be happy for once. God, why can't you let me be happy. Fuck man i don't think i'll be able to sleep tonight.