#just... you know

That the only thing holding him back is the memory of himself going dark with the demon blood powers years ago.

(Sorry, I couldn't resist.)

And how he drops that restraint the moment he finds out that Lily is not talking about any dark powers, but about angelic, divine ones.

I mean, look at how interested he suddenly is.

This is just an assumption on my part, but I think his posture and facial expression mean he is so willing to pay the price?

He even puts the angel blade away he'd been fiddling with up to this point.

He's willing to pay the price until he finds out that this price also includes going back to one of his other deepest regrets—the time he was soulless and completely unhinged and without any remorse.

Which gives them yet another thing to bond over? Something nobody else would truly understand.

Listen, I'm not actually shipping Sam/Lily. I'm honestly not even completely sure what my point for this post is. But I'm just intrigued, you know?

They somehow put Sam's dark past with the demon blood powers and the soulless era and the desperate hunt for revenge for the deaths of Mary and Jess all into one conversation?

That and magic!

Then Lily's "You don't trust me, I understand" is like a throwback to one of the first things Sam said to Rowena: "I don't trust you, and I never will."

And then Lily, as if she already knew Sam in and out from the short time they've spent with each other, brings up the one thing that actually has the potential to make him go down that soulless road again.

Dean's death.

We know it's possible.

Just like Dean's fate was what made Sam drop all his restraints to team up with Rowena, it could do the same thing again, couldn't it?

If Ishim had managed to kill Dean and Cas that night, Sam would have wanted Ishim dead with very little regard for whatever personal sacrifices Sam would have had to make for that. Even if, for some reason, that would have been an eye?

We know that.

Lily knows that.

And Sam knows it, too.