#juniper study.

L   :   LOVE.   who does your muse love?

maybe probably elliot @withbeasts :) nobody else in any other verses really!

O   :   ODE.   does your muse have a way with words?

i think so, but she doesn't. so she's probably just normal and not very exceptional with her words.

V   :   VALENTINE.   how does your muse feel about valentine’s day?

she loves holidays, consumerism, tradition, gifts, american culture. is also into galentine's day as a concept.

E   :   EMBRACE.   does your muse like hugs? what are their hugs like?

🫀 : what emotion scares them the most?

CAIN.

lust? the impulse to behave manipulatively or selfishly? excessive indulgence? though when it comes to indulgence/gluttony, he is less scared and more openly dismissive and judgmental.

JUNIPER.

juniper is scared of any and all intense emotional displays. she does very well with calm and rational people. charisma goes far too. that aside, she is particularly frightened of other people's fear because she is of the mind that being a scared little boy motivates harris to behave the way he does and his survival instincts are easily triggered.

SAMIRA.

anger! her own anger. there's a scene in s1 where samira gets very stern and angry with a patient bc he is refusing to acknowledge he is addicted to pillz and may die quite soon with little to no regard for his family. i think this scene shows samira's propensity for self-righteousness and also that she isnt as over the death of her father as she later tries to say (which is pretty obvious bc she is constantly suppressing her emotions until she crashes and burns). anyway i also think samira is afraid to acknowledge her resentment of the healthcare system she now works within and wants to reform.

even in s2 by the end of everything she goes through, she's just exhausted. not quite resigned, but worn the fuck out. sitting with anger is hard for her.

AOIFE.

aoife is not scared of anything except for maybe some rats.

[ 💢 ]ㅤ.ㅤwho have they never forgiven and never will ?

lila really doesnt know that many people. i dont think she knows/remembers enough about her childhood for her to never forgive dr max theyer for, like, doing experiments on her, causing her to go deaf, and scheduling her for termination.

maybe harris. she's always been a somewhat helpless observer to his abuse towards the woman, especially juniper obviously. lila is attached to juniper to the point of codependency and probably resents harris a) for demanding juniper's time, attention and obedience b) hurting juniper and c) diminishing juniper's self-worth so much, because lila thinks the world of her.

at lila's age, she is very conscious that she believes she will never forgive anyone she resents.

[ 🫀 ]ㅤ.ㅤwho taught them what love is ? did it hurt ?

juniper! juniper has shown her the purest maternal, big sister love in the whole entire world. it has been very healing for juniper to raise lila (even though it has fostered such an extreme attachment and they struggle when apart/have a really hard time going their separate ways long term)

i would say it was really painful for juniper because juniper was so conscious of her own mother's mysterious, dismissive, neglectful presence in her life—and of course the burden of learning what her parents did to the human experiments. she wants to be a different sort of presence in lila's life—create a new legacy. lila is less aware of the lab because she doesnt have any memories of it, so she doesnt have a point of comparison.

the most painful part about being loved so much by juniper is loving her back and watching her get increasingly lost in harris—not only juniper getting more entrenched, but lila becoming more aware of harris's impact as lila gets older and more discerning, too.

[ 🧭 ]ㅤ.ㅤwhere would they go if they could disappear tomorrow ?

wherever juniper wants to go—me and my dog and an impossible view!

i dont think she dreams much of travel or exploring. she's very much a homebody partially because of her attachment to juniper, partially because the world is really strange and overwhelming to her after so much time with Just her family living their feral, itinerant lifestyle that they lived before finally settling down.

what are some features of others that arouse them, or they find arousing in a sexual situation?

strength, sturdiness, reliability turn her on.

she likes clear, precise communication. a man who knows what he wants. though many situations might seem like it's necessary or optimal for juniper to make the first move in order to make her demonstrated interest abundant, she actually prefers when her partner initiates. she likes that confidence and that display of desire.

she is exceptionally aroused when the above traits give way to vulnerability and open-mindedness and she is allowed, in rare form, to take control and enact her own desires. their willingness to accept her, her willingness to reveal herself to that level, really get her going - since she's usually so withdrawn and, at the risk of repeating myself and being cliche, repressed.

she likes muscles. she likes expertise in a particular trade or skill area, especially if that lends itself to passion. she likes being physically on top/riding her partner even though i would generally consider her more on the submissive side overall.

how satisfactory has their sex life been thus far?

juniper is not very sexually active. (i say this when canonically she ends up having a kid with one guy, scotch @codecx and then, essentially a year or less later, a kid with another guy @eviji , so like, clearly, at at least one point in her life, juniper is able to get it on well and good. i think her relationship with scotch empowers her to be more open and separate from harris in future relationships.)

that being said, i have so many different verses for her bc most interactions are different verses. she's like, the same in each, it's just new and separate dynamics. i think the default starting point is that she's had unremarkable sex once or twice and doesn't seek sex out by using dating apps, partying, etc. her relationship with harris/her home life also make it difficult for her to have relationships, let alone relationships that lead to sex. she is unsatisfied and capable of intimacy but typically has other priorities.

DMITRI

what kind of future do they crave, and who’s in it ?

answered

do they have a favourite lie they like to hear ?

@eyeshone a lot of the times joey hypes up his competency, intelligence, strength, or dominant capabilities, even though i feel like i know joey is being earnest, i feel like it's such an absurd perception of dmitri, of all people, that i feel like (and dmitri sometimes feels like) it counts as lying. but, fuck, it feels really good.

JUNIPER

do they have a dream or goal they have given up on ?

i havent written about her pursuing her ged in awhile! that would be really fun to keep exploring, because i don't think she's necessarily given up on it, but i do think her priorities have evolved as lila gets a little older as well - ensuring lila has a safe place to become a young woman in the world mostly capable of taking care of herself.

i do think juniper has given up on a proper reconciliation with spirit. she has resigned herself to experiencing spirit's animosity and resentment.

when did they feel the safest ?

just as lila is co-dependent on juniper, juniper is co-dependent on lila. juniper feels safest when they're on the couch eating junk food and watching old-timey romantic cinema. she would say out loud if asked about this that she feels safest when harris comes home after a long night.

ANDY

do they have a sound, like a song or voice, that they associate with peace ?

nicky cooking - food sizzling, being sautéed. i think nile's voice, of all their voices, makes her feel the most at peace—or at least makes her feel like she should be the most at peace. @choicescreen

JACQUELINE

what’s a truth about themselves they refuse to admit ?