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Charlie: Ugh, being a human sucks. Juniper, what do you humans order when they're in a bad mood?
Juniper: It depends. Vincent likes whiskey, Tommy gets mango juice. I've usually seen Hailey order a chocolate sundae.
Charlie: I'll have twelve chocolate sundaes.
Juniper: Uh, people don't usually---
Charlie: I'm in a really bad mood.
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Juniper: Yeah, after all we've been through, I get pretty nervous when large objects pass by. I think I might be a little megalophobic.
Thorin: *tears welling* What did Sans Undertale do to you?
Juniper: The way stories differ from life is the "ending." In real life, things just happen...there may be no exciting climax, no resolution, no answers....
Juniper: I'm helping someone move out and I poured 8 bottles of expired coke into the toilet, but when I flushed it nothing cool happened.
Dorkus: coke expires??
Ezra: Your average pineapple, peeled and cut makes about 4.5 cups or 36 ounces of pineapple chunks. Cans of pineapple come in a variety of sizes the most common being 20oz and 46oz. Meaning a single pineapple generally won’t fill up a single can perfectly, wich also means everytime u eat pineapple from a can somewhere someone else has the can that has the rest of that same pineapple. Meaning u can share a single fruit with a stranger from hundreds of miles away and I think that’s beutiful
Juniper: How much sleep are you getting?
Ezra: Not enough my guy
Murder God: Someone will die.
Thorin: Of fun!
Juniper: Aww.
*Three years later*
Charlie: Someone will die.
Ozolthog: Of fun!
Juniper: Suddenly this is no longer reassuring.
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[texting]
Juniper: Answer your phone
Dorkus: Wait a minute, I can’t find my phone
Juniper: Understood
Juniper: You’re a terrible person. You know you’re killing me. You’re killing me, Dorkus.
Percy:Â Do you think different paints have different tastes? Ezra:Â They do. Juniper:Â ...Why did you say that with such certainty?
