#jungwon thoughts

he isn’t angry or jealous, not exactly. but there is a quiet intensity in the way he looks at you, like he needs to remind you—remind himself—that this thing between you is real, raw, undeniable. jungwon knew the consequences of having a pretty girlfriend, of course boys were going to hit on her and flirt with her, trying to steal you away. but he didn’t mind any of it, his confidence in your loyalty stayed strong.

although tonight was different. the way that guy invaded your proximity ticked a radar off in yang jungwon— until he couldn’t take it anymore.

you’re only his to touch.

“hmm?” he hums, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers brushing past your cheeks, “jungwon what?”

“you don’t have to be jealous, you know,” you sigh, your breath hitching once again.

jungwon finally leans in, until his cologne hits stronger in the air, mingled with his hot breath falling over your neck.

his fingers brush against your jaw, tilting your chin up with a touch so gentle it sends a shiver down your spine. “i know you,” he murmurs, voice low, intimate. “you weren’t interested in him. but still, seeing someone else act like they could have you?” his thumb traces the corner of your lip, lingering, before his fingers slid lower, ghosting over your pulse. “i didn’t like that.”

your lips part slightly, and that’s all it takes.

jungwon immediately leans in, capturing your lips in a kiss that was unhurried and intense. it isn’t rough or rushed—just deep, deliberate. his hands find your waist, fingers spread over the fabric of your shirt before slipping beneath, palms warm against your skin. he kisses you like he has all the time in the world, savoring, making sure you feel every bit of his presence, his need.

you melt into him, fingers sliding into his hair, and the quiet sigh you let out had him pressing closer, his body molding against yours. he deepens the kiss, his lips brushing against yours in a way that sends warmth pooling in your stomach. when he pulls back slightly, his lips barely an inch from yours, he lets out a soft chuckle, his breath warm against your skin.

“i don’t have to be jealous,” he whispers, eyes never leaving yours, “i already know you’re mine.”

your chest rose and fell with the weight of his words, his touch. “you sound so sure.”

his smile is slow, confident. “i don’t have to sound sure.” his lips ghost over yours again, teasing, coaxing. “i just know.”

he giggles into another kiss as your hand flies to cup his cheeks, well you back, you squeeze them together, cooing, “jealousy does look cute on you, love.”

and now it was time for him to be flustered.

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Jake– one of the bombshells from Casa Amor– had pulled him aside the morning after, carefully delivering the news of his chat with you to him. He saw the way Jungwon’s face fell, the way tears piled up on the rims of his eyes, the quivers of his bottom lip despite the force with which he bit down on it. It was hard to watch for Jake– someone as upbeat as Jungwon rarely ever got upset considering how much usually went down in the villa, but you always had a way of playing with his composure, and then was no different.

“Listen bro, I’m sorry,” – Jake put a hand on Jungwon’s shoulder, awkwardly rubbing at it– “You know you’re my man.” The gesture did nothing to comfort Jungwon, his heart hammering inside his chest. He nodded quicker than he had liked, springing up from his seat to walk away.

Jungwon had no desire to talk to you, his nerves eating him alive. He was worried about what you’d say, if you would call your connection off if Jungwon got honest with you. More than anything, he really wanted to keep you by his side, despite how you treated him, but he knew that he had to say something, and soon.

Everyone knew how he felt about you, and they also knew about what happened last night, news traveling like rapid fire around the villa. No matter what kind of smile Jungwon tried to put on his face, it was always the same greetings and comments,

You okay, Won?

You’re good, Jungwon.

Want to chill with us, Jungwon?

Want a hug, Jungwon?

It was starting to kill him– the pity, the embarrassment he felt. To him, it felt as if you had already broken off your connection with him, as if the other islanders knew something he didn’t. They looked at him as if the decision had already been made, that you no longer felt for him what he felt for you. 

He suffocated under the gazes of the islanders, their worried smiles and useless words of encouragement only making him want to throw himself into the ocean outside the villa. Suddenly, he straightened, a newfound determination rushing over him. This wouldn’t do for him– he couldn’t do it anymore.

You were talking to Riki in the kitchen, and Jungwon made a line to you, his steps charged and purposeful. You looked up from your conversation to meet eyes with Jungwon, whose face twisted with a kind of disappointment you’d never seen on him. “Jungwon?”

“We need to talk.” His voice was dull, cold and closed off. There was no smile on his face, no warmth in his presence, nothing. This had been out of character for him, and your heart immediately dropped. He knew. The tension in the air froze the kitchen over, and Riki cringed, speed-walking towards the gym area. You stammered, “Jungwon, listen–”

“You know,” Jungwon chuckled bitterly, “after all this time, I still can’t tell what it is you want from me.” Your lips pursed, unable to speak. You played with the strings of your bikini bottoms nervously as you let him continue. “I pour my heart out to you every single day, and you tell me that our connection is special, that you can see a future for us outside of this villa,” his voice cracked despite himself, “and then you go and make out with another man in the Speakeasy. Are you serious, Y/N?”

You’re nearly rendered speechless if not for the urge to explain yourself, to justify your actions. “Jungwon, we agreed that we would be open to exploring new connections–”

“We’ve been in here for nearly a month, Y/N! How much more exploring do you need to be sure of us? What is it going to take for you to come up with a clear opinion on our connection?” He pointed to himself, “I’ve explored connections, I had more than enough time to do that. I tried talking to the Casa girls, and none of them compared to you.” Jungwon felt the will to speak draining from his body little by little, his voice growing more dejected by the second. “I don’t feel for anyone else what I feel for you, and I’m done pretending that I don’t care about you exploring other men!”

Confusion fills you, the effects of the misunderstanding finally gaining on you. Your brows furrowed, and you shook your head. “Jungwon, we aren’t even closed off! The whole point of Love Island is that we explore, and I’m doing that! I’m putting myself first!” You made a gesture to the both of you, “And you know I adore our connection, but I’d be doing myself a disservice if I didn’t explore every possible connection.”

“That’s not my problem–”

“You just said it was!”

“Do you have to make out with every single man you feel something for to test out your chemistry?” Jungwon exhales, exasperated. Your eyes widen in shock, anger suddenly flipping your demeanor. Offended, you argue back, “It’s not that serious, Jungwon! Kissing is another way of learning about someone– it’s how I test my connections!” You point to him, “My conversation with Jake literally made me certain that I want you, Jungwon! I want you!” 

“That’s bullshit!” Jungwon’s face contorts in disgust, his voice now the loudest in the villa. “You wanted the both of us to give you all the attention in the world, you wanted us to put everything on the line for you, and then choose which one of us you like more!” Tears are falling freely down his cheeks, and nearby islanders are frozen at the sight. “It’s disrespectful to me, to Jake, to Jake’s own connection! What if you decided you liked Jake’s kiss more than mine? Would you really be willing to throw everything away? Every conversation, every good time we spent together? Over a kiss?!” 

“Why are you being like this, Jungwon?! We aren’t even–”

“I don’t care! I don’t care that we aren’t closed off, you never gave me a chance to ask!” He pauses, as if to stop himself from going completely off the rails. A stressed hand runs through his hair as he continues, “Honestly, Y/N? I’m jealous– I’m so fucking jealous of all the men who get to connect with you because I really like you and I’ve wanted to close things off for a while now,” his voice quiets, “but everytime I try, you’re off exploring a new connection.” He sighs, void of any lasting fight he had in the past. 

You feel as if someone landed a clean punch at your stomach, knocking the wind out of you. The confession is gutting, all of the raw emotion in his voice left you stunned. You didn’t know what to say– you weren’t even sure if there was anything you could say. Jungwon’s voice had become no louder than a whisper when he finished, “I just wish that you showed up for this–for us–  like I did. Like I still do.”

He looked down at you expectantly, waiting for any answer to leave your lips. He didn’t care what it was– he just wanted to hear you, but you never spoke. You stayed silent, tears falling in a steady stream from your eyes.

you had been counting down to christmas all year, the days marked not with numbers but with quiet, vivid imaginings. you’d pictured you and jungwon sitting together wrapped in a soft blanket in the living room, surrounded by fairy lights whilst sipping on hot chocolate. a day spent outside building a snowman, recording the chaotic process with your ancient camcorder. jungwon is all you want for christmas, but it’s already christmas eve now, and jungwon isn’t here.

"gosh, i miss you so much wonnie," you say, pouting. "can't believe i'm left behind in this stupid boring town whilst you're in the city. there's nothing to do here- more sheeps than humans, i swear."

jungwon's laugh makes you smile despite your sadness.

"i miss you so much as well. i've got to go now, y/n. i promise i'll see you soon, okay?"

you roll your eyes, leaning back in your chair frustrated. "yeah, when is soon, jungwon? when is soon-"

jungwon ends the call, the line disconnecting with a little beep. you stare down at your dark screen in disbelief before letting out a huff.

asshole.

you wonder for a split second whether he's not coming back because he's not interested anymore. perhaps he found a prettier, smarter, nicer girl in university whom he's going to spend time with for christmas.

no, jungwon won't do that. he loves you.

right?

but if he did, would he really not come back for christmas without a proper explanation as to why?

and the way he ended the call with you so abruptly- maybe another girl was with him, holding his hand as he called you.

you throw your phone down on the sofa next to you, shaking your head.

"no, jungwon won't do that. he loves me." you say to yourself, saying it out loud as if it'll help convince you.

but can you really blame jungwon if he's found someone else? you aren't that pretty, and you don't even go to university with him.

amid your worries, there’s a knock on the door.

it’s soft, almost hesitant, but it breaks through the stillness like the first note of a song. your brows furrow.

you get up from the armchair, wondering who it is. it's definitely not the delivery man- you haven't ordered anything recently. a friend, maybe? no, they're all away, some of them to the city, some to the beach and some to warmer countries to flee from the biting cold of december.

so who is it?

"coming!" you call out, walking over to the door. you take in a deep breath, bracing yourself for the gust of icy cold air that's sure to blow in if you open the door.

you turn the door knob, immediately met with the cold wind and blizzard. and then you see him.

jungwon.

his cheeks are flushed pink from the cold, his dark hair peeking out of his knit beanie. he stands there, bundled in a thick coat, a dust of snow covering him and a small, gold wrapped box in his hands. he looks impossibly perfect against the pale winter backdrop, his smile soft, a little shy, but warm enough to melt away all your doubts and worries and frost in an instant.

“umm, merry christmas,” he says, his voice gentle and soft.

you stare for a moment or two, your breath caught somewhere between disbelief and relief, before stepping forward and throwing your arms around him. jungwon’s laugh is muffled against your shoulder as he lifts up from the ground to swing you to and fro like a little kid before putting you back down.

“you’re here,” you whispered. “i thought you couldn’t come.”

he pulled back from the embrace justice enough to look at you properly, and he sweeps away your hair from your face. “of course i’m here,” he murmurs. “i’ve been busy with university, couldn’t even talk to you on the phone that much, but i had to come.”

you feel your cheeks grow warm. “i thought you found someone else.”

“what?”

it sounds silly now, but you continue. “i thought you found a smarter, prettier girl at uni. thought you weren’t coming for christmas because you’re spending it with her.”

jungwon just laughs now. “you think i would replace you? princess, you overthink too much. i would never go off with another girl when you’re so perfect.”

he leans down to give you a sweet little kiss on the lips, and you smile.

“alright, let’s go in now before all this blizzard and cold gets in. let’s make a snowman together, and we can watch old disney together…”

Jungwon would definitely hold you against his bike to kiss you, caressing your waist & hips with a small smirk as he pinned you, so you couldn’t move. He’d press his body against yours, completely trapping you so you have no chose but to give in. Gloves are OFF because he wants to feel you underneath him

Would let you wear his jacket, and would take pictures of you wearing it telling you how hot you look. It’s his motivation before a race, the image will boost his already soaring confidence 🆙

If he noticed you were feeling stressed, he would offer to take you on joyrides around the countryside to ease your mind. Jungwon likes nature walks, so a racer jungwon would love joyrides! makes sense 💯

Would take great care of his motorcycle, like that’s practically his baby (second to you). Jungwon is very meticulous, so he’ll spend a lot of time making sure it’s clean, and drives well

Would never rev up his engine when he’s coming to pick you up late for a date or random outing. As much as I love cocky Jungwon, he’s NOT impolite! He would turn off his headlights, and shut off the engine so the neighbors, or anybody that lives with you could sleep peacefully. Then he’d just text you that he’s here

Weird, but he’d have you kiss both of his dimples before a race as a good luck charm. I dunno, i just see it

Jungwon looks so good in all leather, so if you tell him he does— he’ll show up everywhere to see you, decked in leather head to toe. Leather bomber jackets, FUCKING LEATHER PANTS😭 u get the picture

Uses his money he wins on races to spoil you. He’ll set aside a good amount of money dedicated to his number 1 fav person, YOUUU!! will buy matching jewelry, matching clothes, matching helmets, matching shoes, etc.

When you’re done with a joyride, or just chilling somewhere, Jungwons will set you sitting right infront of him. He’s loves when you lean onto him, and his hands will wrap around you, planting kisses on your earlobes, head, and cheeks. Mans content with life cause he has: racing, and the love of his life

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