#junebro

Balatro: The Game That Should Have Won Game Of The Year Because It Is Ten Times Better Than The Bullshit That Got The Award

alright, welcome back to another belated and severely late installment of this review thing i do, called JuneBro. real quick, i wanna apologize to the bros (albeit small in number) who saw the last review as that shit was NOT in character and was just written in a way I hated. gonna work on keeping it brotastic here and making sure im actually writing like a cool person instead of some dumb homo tool (homo as in homo sapiens, i respect the gays).

anyways, so lets talk about this card game. when i first heard of balatro honestly i kinda thought it was just gonna be another "flavor-of-the-week" game ala Lethal Company or Content Warning (both are great games but its also like DAMN did those games fall off holy SHIT). i decided impulsively at some point that i was gonna try it since im an apple one subscriber and got the game for free due to apple arcade. so this game is sitting on my phone now and im like, so this is about poker or some noise? im not that into card games, ive played a round of rummy or two in my time (as a bro typically does) but ive barely played poker and i wasnt expecting much to be honest. from what ive seen online a lot of cats seem hella pumped about it, and so i start the game and for some reason, it hooks me in. i dont know how, something about seeing the funny blue and red number go up just awakens something in a motherfucker. but i very quickly realize that the vanilla experience for this game is okay, but when do you get to BREAK some shit? like while youre playin cards or whatever, wheres the satisfaction of knowing youre greatly exploiting the game to your fucking will? wheres the satisfaction of having joker combos that you had a hand in manipulating? when do you get to shove the chips and mult system over the railing and just go to town? how do you get all the luck? all very important and thought provoking questions. were doing so much goddamn thinking over here were turning into the fucking thinker.

so thats when i decide to get it on PC and install a like, FUCK ton of mods. im talking at least 20. and honestly? yeah, i know that some bros are gonna look at me and say "well youre doing it the cowards way, you should finish vanilla balatro before you mod it" and you know what? i dont give a fuck honestly. i dont care that i feel like i need stuff like incremental jokers that give times mult. sometimes you gotta just rig shit in your favor because if it works for politicians and fucking lawmakers then it works for me. back to the review, when you install the right mods on this thing, man you can turn the whole game into a particle accelerator and really fuck some shit up. i wanna eventually get into modding the game with my own mods. i wanna add homestuck jokers, valve jokers, all the fucking jokers. theres gonna be so many goddamn jokers that hollywoods gonna have to make a jokerverse movie because theres that many fucking jokers.

anywho, i decided to give this game a 4.75/5 shades to keep it real.

allllrighty bros, sorry for the long ass wait in between reviews, i havent like finished a lot of things and i really was racking my empty ass skull for some shit to review when it suddenly hit me. i was all like "dude, squid game has finished, you should like write a review on each of the seasons or something!!" to myself, i then responded "woah thats like such a sicknasty idea dude, youre so awesome" and then i proceeded to glaze myself in order to compensate for the past few months of just dragging my candy ass nuts through the self hate fields. getting back on track, i cannot believe that squid game has been exploited as much as it has, considering its message is against one of the worst economic systems to ever grace the human presence, motherfucking Capitalism. man do i hate it. im sure you bros at home do too. maybe.

anyways so lets go back to 2021, when i was a fucking goober ass fool doing goober ass fool things, and you probably were too. unless youre some cool cat that had their shit together. i actually wasnt allowed to watch this show when it came out due to my bitch ass parentals at the time thinking it was "too gorey" for me when like, i have already seen isis beheadings and dudes being shot to death on reddit and shit. so i did what any dumbass teenager would do and i secretly watched it when i could. am i gonna tell you what method i used or go into specifics? FUCK no, weatherboy, you and your fed friends are NOT getting my ass today. so anyways, this show is sitting on the tv about to be played, and the intro made me think "so this is about squids or some noise? the only other squid related media i know about is splatoon, and this shit does NOT look like splatoon." and yeah, past me was right, this shit was NOT splatoon.

the show started off slow like most do, and if youre looking for a recap of what the season was like, this is not the review you should be reading. i dont know why you are realizing that a whole three fucking paragraphs in but the rest of this review is gonna be short and sweet, no carpenter. obviously the character deaths didnt hit me as hard as it did others due to my fucked suspension of disbelief skills, but i was secretly rooting for my boy GI-Hun to pull through, and by gods he did. but the story was engaging, and we gotta hand it to netflix for hearing the shows creator out (that is the ONLY props im giving netflix since its an evil ass company damn near cock full of evil larrys and shit). this show made me hate the upper class more than i already do, considering that honestly i feel like we as a like, society or whatever, are really fucking close to doing some shit like this. hell, with mr. breast 6000 existing, we kinda already ARE there. i GUARANTEE you jimmy donaldson could start killing bitches in his challenges and we would somehow just fucking allow it. maybe sewerslvt is right man, the world, well no more like the country, is FVVVVVVVCKED dude. like big time. sorry to be a debbie downer at the end but someones gotta tell it like it is around here.

anyways, i give this season a 4.25 shades out of 5 to always keep it the realest.

TW: This review mentions suicide, murder, horror films and contains spoilers for Unfriended and Unfriended: Dark Web.

welcome bros to this double issue review of the two unfriended movies that have been made!

little known fact about me, i like getting scared sometimes, which is why i like shit like rollercoasters and some horror films. these two films are part of a genre called "screen life", which is where the entirety of the film is told thru a computer or digital interface. i *LOVE* these kinds of films as they just scratch an itch in my brain i didnt know needed to be scratched. ANYWAYS, lets snap into this double review like motherfuckers in your local walmart be snappin into slim jimsssss.

Unfriended (2015)

the basic premise of this film is that a group of friends caused this girl laura to kill herself, and i guess the spirit of laura comes to kill said friend group a year after laura shot herself. i do like the fact that this movie was made when mac os x was NOT in its somewhat sleek era, as it was a good callback to the mac os i used to use when i was but a lil girl. overall this film being so old did kinda make me a little detached from the narrative, but it was still a good watch. kinda wish i didnt spend 4 fucking dollars renting it tho. i decided to start a plex server after this desicion because i want to never pay a streaming platform EVER again. overall i give it a 3.5 out of 5 shades to keep it one hundo.

Unfriended: Dark Web (2018)

ok. this film was SO much better than the first unfriended. we follow our boyfailure matias as he steals a laptop that belongs to this dark web group, and the dark web group decided to just, kill him and all his friends for funzies! its game night, of course! what else are a bunch of sweaty kiwifarm chuds supposed to do on a friday night? jerk off? hell nah man they already DID that this morning! joking aside, the execution of this film was AMAZING. i was on the edge of my seat, and this was the first horror film in a WHILE to get my bitch ass to JUMP at the scary parts and actually feel like i was witnessing some horrid shit. MAJOR kudos to the team that worked on this film, you guys did so goddamn well. this shit made my adrenaline rush as well, it was like a universal coaster but in a movie. this movie got a 4.5 out of 5 shades because it fucking deserves that. period.

WARNING: Contains Spoilers!

Fallout 4. It was indeed quite the video game. Being the first major Bethesda game I've ever completed and honestly? I enjoyed it. Obviously after installing 10+ mods to make the game enjoyable, I did indeed enjoy not only progressing my character (Nate's wife, who Nate loves so so so SO much) through the game, but the mindset changes I went through while playing this game. Going from being the Wasteland's bitch to Joining the Institute to eventually becoming the God of the Wasteland and Director of the Institute, I felt the changes in firepower, level and the satisfying feeling of killing the Railroad and the Brotherhood of Steel. That being said, not every game, ESPECIALLY a Bethesda game, is perfect. Theres so much I could say about Bethesda's engine, but I'm not making this long ass Tumblr post about Bethesda's stupid janky engine, its a FALLOUT POST dammit!

Overall, the story was fairly good. The MacGuffin quest I went on to find my son only to find he's in charge of the Institute, which aparently is hated for some reason, but also an old ass man was quite satisfying.

As a woman myself, I def reccomend getting frozen for 220 years, halfway through witnessing the death of your husband and the kidnapping of your baby, eventually thawing and following a series of clues with the best robot ever (Nick Valentine my beloved....), finding the guy who did the things youve witnessed, killing him, taking his gun and dismantling both a small rebellion and a robo-racist JROTC kid filled faux millitary. It beats the other ending where you blow up a nuclear reactor in a populated area and basically turn Massachusetts into Chernobyl.

I have a few more qualms about this game, but I'm making a video to accompany this silly post so look for that.

I give this game a:

3.8/5 shades, to keep it above 30 RADS

Reviewers Note: The Brotherhood of Steel is a BITCHASS MOTHERFUCKER, THEY FUCKED MY WIFE!!!!

hey, im rune strider (tho most of you can call me june)

im a 19 year old transsexual woman whos also a lesbian (woah)

im also biracial! its a thing ive hidden for a bit and i feel weird about that so yea, im an eighth black from my moms side whos a quarter who gets it from my grandpa whos half.

i mostly will just kinda post my thoughts here, this blog is just meant to be my personal lil slice of tumblr

my interests are mostly homestuck, deltarune, the walking dead, half life, deadlock, tf2, content creation, game dev, music (both making and listening) and old tech!!

i consider myself a soft butch tomboy, and dont really have a preference for either butches or femmes

i am currently (as of 12/10/25): single! not looking to date tho unless you catch my eye in a certain way

my asks and dms are always open, especially if youre from nebraska or are a fellow queer

my blog wont be primarily nsft, it will drift there a few times tho so minors, scram!!!

i dont really talk about kinks publicly so theyre only available upon request

my main tags are:

#rune's ebubbles for my thoughts

#junebro for reviews on games and stuff

#rune.jpg for photos of me

thats about it tho, thats me

JUNEBRO: Album Review of I'M DOING IT AGAIN BABY!

I'M DOING IT AGAIN BABY! by girl in red is her second studio album and goddamn it hits. its a bop after bop and I am so happy this album exists, ive been wondering what this new album would be like and i feel like this is a perfect continuation of the sound that her first album had, albeit more refined now. def a good album ill be putting on repeat. did feel weirdly short but thats fine, i sure as hell dont have any ground to stand on when it comes to album lengths lol.

rating:

4.5/5 shades (to keep it real)

reviewer notes: