joyce and lonnie fascinate me. the fact that she called him. in season 1, after he was already out of their life (and we never find out whether he left or was kicked out, but the evidence is pretty strong that he was the one who left, considering he has a new girlfriend), when she felt like there was no one she could turn to and no one listening to her, joyce called lonnie. and it wasn't the first time she called him in the season, either!! she called him about will and he didn't even bother returning the call. but when she called asking him to come, he did.
i just want to do an autopsy on what happened there. obviously lonnie sucks (and if you go by first shadow canon, he has Always Sucked) but he's still a whole guy. he had a whole relationship and marriage and two children with joyce. what the hell went on there. did joyce see something in him that no one else could? did she get knocked up young and feel pressured to marry him? was he more tolerable before he had children who didn't live up to his expectations? lonnie was and remains a terrible father, but he must think he cares about his family. he came when joyce called. he talks about jonathan visiting more and tries to parent him even when jonathan repeatedly dismisses and berates him. clearly some part of him "cares" about his family, he just doesn't actually care about them, he cares about the imaginary versions of them that he's constructed in his head who rely on and look up to him. he doesn't care that will doesn't like baseball, he doesn't care that jonathan doesn't want him there, he doesn't care that joyce is better off without him. he chooses to believe he is valuable and important to the byers family unit. why? how does he convince himself of that, when joyce and jonathan have both made it clear it isn't true?
he must have had the occasional moment of being sweet or charming or seemingly a good father, right? because joyce isn't an idiot or a pushover, we know this. but we also know that joyce knows that lonnie called will gay slurs and had no idea where jonathan had wanted to go to college since age six. so there must have been something about lonnie. or maybe it was something about joyce. obviously the relationship was dysfunctional, but then, all throughout season 1 we keep hearing that joyce has "had anxiety problems in the past," that she's been "a few steps" from "falling off the edge" for "awhile now," and also that something runs in her family ("remember your aunt darlene?") - maybe paranoia, maybe schizophrenia, maybe hallucinations, maybe just severe anxiety, but something. jonathan knew it, and lonnie did too.
we meet joyce in season 1 at a point in her life when she generally believes she and her sons are better off without lonnie. ("oh, brother, i have not needed you for a long time.") but we don't meet her at a point where she's sure about that. because she did call him, still. at her lowest. and he, thinking finally he could step in and restore some order and normalcy to the shitshow that had become of the byers name since he left, came to her. maybe a part of him came for the money. but i think a part of him felt so self-important, too. and on both counts his motivations for coming back to hawkins were not related to actually caring about joyce or jonathan. his twelve-year-old son died and he took that as an opportunity to insinuate himself back into their lives. telling himself yes, it took a tragedy, but they had realized their mistake in letting him go. that they were finally willing to accept that boys need a father to model masculinity and a woman needs a husband to keep her crazy quiet. i would never justify lonnie byers, but i can't deny his characterization intrigues me. he's the best kind of villain because it is so clear he think he's right, and that makes him suck even worse.
did joyce stay with lonnie so long because he was already used to her "crazy"? was it inertia? did he convince her that no one else would love her if not him? did he make her believe that when the whole world turned on her, only he would be there? because the whole world turned on her, and she called him. and i want! to know! why!!!!!!!!!
