#journal 21

Who: Higgs When: Writing year unknown Where: Unknown

I've got Amelie, fucking finally. She's trapped in Edge Knot City— a horde of BTs all round. She's not going anywhere now. No, I'm gonna go take good care of my sweet little angel of death. My extinction entity. We got plans, me and her...

As for you, Sammy boy... You're gonna learn what it means to really suffer.

·  diseñar sticker sheets

·  portfolio de libro de texto MEGALINDÍSIMO

·  terminar de leer Stormbringer

·  formatear /más o menos/ el móvil shghsg

·  solicitar entrar al zine 🧍‍♂️

·  conseguir un nuevo alumno

 FAVORITOS DE NOVIEMBRE DE 2021

❤  las galletas de animal crossing

❤  el pelucho de akutagawa <3

❤  la update del animal crossing

❤  el anuncio de la temporada 4 de BSD!!!!!!

❤  el anuncio de los nendos de akutagawa y atsushi!!!!!!!

·   tener nuevas commissions

·  colección de papeles de naruto

·  parte 1 del curso de patrones

·  abandonar el carnet de conducir

·  terminar de escribir el nekoma study AU

·  empezar a escribir el fic de sugawara brujito

·  hacer muchos vídeoedits

·  terminar el peluche de napstablook

·  terminar el manga de hunterxhunter

·  encontrar un gato perdido

·  pintar con tinta

·  reconectar el escáner

  FAVORITOS DE OCTUBRE DE 2021

❤  esperar el autobús en las rocas del mar

❤  pintar en gouache azul

❤  el comeback de dazai y fyodor!!!

❤  los animes de bakuman, kimetsu (el onding (!)) y one piece

❤  la agenda y el bolígrafo de muji!!

❤  el fantasma de cerámica

❤  la ropa nueva suave

❤  el anuncio de la temporada 3 de mob psycho (!!)

❤ el manga de haikyuu!!!!!!  

Five years from now is a long time. So much can happen in one year, so five years is quite the gamble. This year I graduate from college with an Associates in Information Technology and will promptly be looking for a job.

With how I want things to pan out after graduation, in five years I see myself working a stable enough job in the field I chose to major in. Hopefully, in a location here I not only can work in what I specialized in, but also better myself in that specialty.

Putting work aside, I also want to be in a good place with my family. Hoping to be on good terms with everyone and that they are all healthy and doing good. If possible, I would like to be able to start supporting my family like they have supported me for my entire life.

There’s a lot I want to do and am looking forward to. I am not going to set goals just yet until I work some things out, but I think that this is loosely what I want to at least START to see in five years.

---

I have a class in my college that helps with the graduation process. This also includes doing interviews. One of the questions that I was looking into was this one. Where do you see yourself in five years?

I realized I never really put much thought into what I want from my future. In my junior of high school year, I was convinced I was never going to even enter college. Now that I’m in college, I have no idea what I’m going to do when I graduate.

It’s like… I’ll have this degree I worked so hard towards and yet, my future is still such a blur. And mostly? It’s my fault. I hate planning things and setting goals. Especially ones so far into the future. I’ve always had this belief that if I set too many goals, I will be disappointed if I don’t reach that goal for one reason or another.

Maybe the way I look at things needs a little bit of reevaluating, but I’ve found that the slight mystery of things adds a little interest in life. I notice that I am not hellbent on only one thing, but rather, I embrace what comes at me.

So, I don't know what the fuck has been wrong with me since I got here but I cannot fucking sleep.  Like, I go to sleep and wake up at 5 in the fucking morning! Like, what am I supposed to do at 5 AM?  Sit and talk to myself.  And I usually go to sleep at like 2 AM so what the fuck am I only sleeping 3 hours for?

Enough about that. Now, as you guys already know, I am gay.  I was on Facebook today and someone on the Harvard page asked if anyone was gay cuz her friend was too shy too.  I just want y'all to read some of the shit I just read, then I'll tell y'all what I said. Just read this:

"Yeah and a rude one as well I mean to ask for someone's sexual orientation like that is just insulting I don't go around asking people if they're straight"

And I'm just like: What the fuck? Would you rather someone assumed your fucking sexual orientation? That's what's rude.  Its not rude to ask.  Most people don't fucking care.  I sure as hell don't. I said "I'm gay and don't care.  It's not like its a secret."

And then this guy was like: "For all you homophobes out there: He's a chill muthafucka". And I felt good about it. Also, I told some of the guys I met that I was gay today and they didn't give one ounce of a fuck. Because most people don't fucking care.  Maybe every once in a while you find some asshole who's like, "Oh my God, you're gay, get away from me."  And with those bitches, you can just wave them off because you have a bunch of other people who don't give a fuck and who will even support you. 

Like, Rodell Jefferson III, Kai Pitts, Sabiyah Turner and Elexis Emon Evans are some of the best people I've ever met because they don't give a fuck and they don't care when I talk about wanting a boyfriend and they even engage in the conversation with me and they support me because they are my friends and they love me.  And really, that's all you need.  People who love and respect you no matter what your personal preferences may be.  They are literally they four greatest people I have ever met in my life.

Okay, that's all for tonight.  I have class tomorrow so I should take my ass to sleep.