i pull up to the tma party and slowly make my way up towards the stage. everyone turns their heads curiously towards me but i am determined. they look at me, faces slowly distorting into disgust, as i whisper ājonelias is better than jmartā into the microphone. i leave covered in tomatoes.
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I am so weak for the 'Jon looking for comfort in Elias bc everyone else thinks he is a monster' trope.
"Elias, am I still human?"
"Oh Jon⦠You are so much more. Can't you see?"
Additional points for Elias adoring Jon like a God. Looking at him as if he were a miracle. Taking pride in Jon developing new powers.
Elias letting Jon use compulsion on him. Elias feeding Jon his own statement from the past.
Jon getting accustomed to the fact that Elias is always watching. It starts to bring him peace. It shifts from being watched to being watched over. Protected, under care.
"I will be watching." Said Elias with a smile.
"I know," Jon answered gratefully.
And Jon sees him. For the first time, he truly sees Elias. He sees Jonah Magnus. He sees his flaws, anxieties, dreams, nightmares, and fears. He sees his devotion and determination. He sees himself through Elias' eyes, and it's so different from how he perceives himself.
And he takes it all in, accepts it all in, and through that accepts himself as he is.
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I havenāt read a whole lot of TMA fic, so Iām sure this already exists somewhere, but I really want a time travel fic where Jon goes back to Gertrudeās era.
So itās 2007-ish, before his younger counterpart has started working at the Institute, but years into Elias and Gertrudeās tenure. Theyāre having a normal day serving the semi-omniscient fear god when a fucking full-fledged avatar of the Beholding - complete with a small mountain of tapes - falls through a rift in space-time and crash lands on Gertrudeās desk.
(Season 5 Jon might have decided not to kill Helen and instead used her to get here. If he ever sees her again theyāre going to have A Talk⢠about her choice of transportation.)
For the record, a hot mess of a man falling from the sky indoors is only like... the eighth most interesting thing to happen to Gertrude this week. Still, itās clear heās not entirely human - one gets a sense for these things, even without a giant eyeballās help - and sheās got a knife on him faster than you can say āStatement.ā This doesnāt seem to faze the man.
That annoys the fuck out of Gertrude.
Meanwhile, Elias has nearly passed out from the supernatural alarm bells going off in his head because the Ceaseless Watcherās special little boy is here!!! What does that mean? Hell if he knows, but this man is ALIGHT with the Entitiesā marks, just dripping with the power of the Eye, and Elias finds he has the sudden urge to drop to his knees before this stranger, something heās only ever done post-Watcherās Crown.
(This might be a Jonlias fic, whoops.)
Elias, seeing The Archivist for the first time: ššššš
Gertrude, seeing The Archivist for the first time: šŖšŖšŖšŖšŖ
So after introductions Jon is all, āYes, Iām an eldritch monster thatās forced to feed off the trauma of others, but Iām your eldritch monster. Please, Gertrude, Iād like nothing more than to carve out Magnusā heart with you so he canāt destroy the whole fucking world.ā
And at first Gertrudeās like hell no, not having any more goddamn avatars in my archives thank you, but then the trio passes young intern Sasha James (shhh donāt worry if that fits the timeline) and Jon looses it. The hold that the Stranger had on him in his original timeline has broken and heās able to recognize this as the real Sasha - her face, her voice, her very panicked looks towards her bosses as this random man sobs into her shoulder. And Gertrudeās like dammit, clearly The Archivist still has some of his humanity left. No true Fear monster would ever willingly be that embarrassing.
After prying Jon away from Sasha and promising her a raise to avoid any HR reports, they get the whole long, traumatic story out of him, but any plans to just permanently kill Elias kinda... sputter out. Itās a little bit of a Web thing, a little bit of a time travel thing, and a little bit of Jon just feeling... wrong when he considers it, no matter what heās told Gertrude. Itās similar to when he let Annabelle live, though Elias has done absolutely fuck-all to earn his mercy. This confuses Jon, though itās pretty far down on his list of worries.
The good news is that Jonās mere presence puts a permanent wrench in Eliasā plans. Heās never going to repeat the ritual to open the door, obviously, and good fucking luck marking another archivist while heās Watching. Given Jonās suspicions that he became semi-immortal after waking from his coma, heāll be Watching a damn long time, you megalomaniacal bastard.
The bad news is that since Elias can no longer plot an intricate manipulation, heās decided that the next best thing is to just convince Jon to bring about the end of the world willingly.
By wooing him.
Elias: āWe can be Kings of a ruined world together, Jon~ā
Gertrude: āI am not paid enough for this.ā
So begins the office romance comedy of Jonās nightmares, where instead of hating him for ruining his world domination plans, Elias is smitten - in a suave, very creepy kinda way - and has decided that heāll simply wait Jon out, wearing him down until the inevitable day when he realizes that they were meant to be. A full-fledged Archivist was dropped into his lap, ranting about how he out-foxed a future version of Elias, tormented by his own monstrosity, and people expected his narcissistic ass to not fall head over heels with his own creation?? As if.
Jon is Not Having A Good Time.
Originally when he landed here he was all, āWhere is my Martin whom I love so dearly? Where is the support and companionship that I crave?ā But after ābumping intoā him a few times outside the Institute, Jon comes to the bitter conclusion that whatever connection they had is gone. He recalls Martinās firm belief that they never would have become a couple without all the trauma theyād been through and though this time around Jon definitely doesnāt hate him... he doesnāt love him either. Oh, he loves that he exists, seeing Martin whole and blissfully ignorant of the Fears helps heal something in Jon, but it takes him a very long time to admit that heās too nice. Too caring. Too tentative in his insecurity. Jon grinds his teeth and admits in the privacy of his own thoughts that he was attracted to a bastard version of Martin, one who showed off a little bit of his own monstrosity, was connected to his own domain, could cut just as cruelly with his words as Jon could with his powers... Meeting with him now over coffee, inches away, Jon has never felt farther from him. This Martin simply isnāt a part of the world that created Jon.
Good, he decides and firmly steers Martin away from the Institute. Thanks to some blackmail and Peter Lukasās money, Martin finds himself with a caretaker for his mom and the promise of a full ride through whatever creative writing program he can get into.
Meanwhile, Elias is of course stalking and spying on Jon whenever he can, doing the metaphorical equivalent of doodling hearts in his notebook whenever he catches a glimpse of why Jon no longer connects with Martin. Heās a bastard avatar with shitty morals and, frankly, far better taste in poetry. Open your third eyes, Jon!!
Gertrude, who avoided sacrificing Michael after a stern talking to from Jon: āYou sure you donāt want the Spiral to eat you, kid? Anythingās better than watching this clusterfuck.ā
Michael: ššš
After a while the Institute settles into a new kind of normal. Jon, Gertrude, and Michael defend the archives from the slew of enemies theyāve both amassed, stopping the occasional ritual in their free time. Jon has long come to the conclusion that the Fears couldnāt have originated here - not with the Eye being unable to see its own creation - so starving them in this reality at the expense of their world wouldnāt serve the greater good. The best they can do is continually contain them - which theyāve gotten real good at. Elias continues to bother Jon with a fervor thatās almost admirable (he can see how this guy managed plans for upwards of 200 years) and waffles between playing the Mysterious Boss archetype that heād used on Jon the first time around, and just giving in to the utter adoration he feels whenever Jon is in the room. Itās clear heās long since started worshiping Jon rather than the Eye and the Eye is... totally fine with that?
Gertrude: āHow did you get the Ceaseless Watcher to treat you like a favored child?ā
After seeing how much happier Martin is, Jon guides the rest of his former assistants away from the Institute, Sasha included. It helps, a little, but it also makes him even more isolated than he was the first time around.
Gertrude realizes this, so when Eliasā flirting - āIāve found a fresh statement for you, Jon. Oh do stop glaring, itās just a bit of chloroform. Sheāll wake up soon. You canāt be satisfied with stale writings for foreverā - starts inducing more fond annoyance than fear or horror, she becomes #Concerned.
Gertrude: āYou realize that desensitizing you to his actions was the point all along, right?ā
Jon: āMmhm. But is it still manipulation if I know itās manipulation?ā
Gertrude: āYou cannot possibly be considering this.ā
Jon: āWould it help if I admitted that dating Elias wouldnāt be the worst decision Iāve ever made?ā
Gertrude: āNO.ā
The thing is, Jon liked Elias before he revealed himself to be an immortal body-snatcher hell-bent on creating... well, hell on Earth. He liked the soft academic exterior, his careful words, love of organization and attention to detail, the dry humor, cutting intellect, those suits that likely cost more than three months of his salary combined... In fact, Jon is now in a place to vividly remember the embarrassment he felt while interviewing for the archivistās position, too busy avoiding looking at Eliasā lips to catch the hungry glint in his eye.
Of course, that Elias only exists as a veneer... though what was Jonās āIām just a normal man going grocery shopping, please ignore my scars and aborted grab as I resist demanding a statement from youā if not a veneer of its own? Where did their ārealā selves begin and their conscious choices end? The most awful thing about all this is that Elias is right. Oh, not about them being Kings of a ruined world, but about how no one but another avatar can truly understand an avatar. By this point Jon is years past his coma, fully at peace - or at least, as at peace as heāll ever get - with the fact that he chose to live as a monster rather than die as a human. That means Knowing things at his leisure... though he tries not to catch anything private. It means Compelling others to provide him with more knowledge... though heās careful with his questions around friends. It means Feeding off of othersā worst moments in life... though Jon restricts himself to statements that Gertrude has collected first, so that he never haunts anyoneās dreams. And it means spending the majority of his time with other monsters and monster-aligned allies... though Jon plants his feet firmly in his human morals and refuses to budge.
If he can navigate all that, why not this too?
Elias has said more than once that he would make Jon the worst version of himself - said with such glee and promise as to almost, almost sound like something Jon wants. Jon figures that the worst version of Elias, from his perspective, would be to look a bit more human.
āWe can bring out the worst in each other,ā he agrees one day, followed by a shark-like grin.
Elias hasnāt the faintest idea what heās just gotten himself into.
And that feels wonderful. Manipulating him into being a marginally better person who doesnāt bring about the apocalypse might actually be more satisfying than stabbing him. The Elias of Jon's original timeline would have HATED this and that makes Jon do a happy little wiggle whenever he thinks about it.
Gertrude: āYouāre leashing a fucking dragon, Sims.ā
Jon: āBetter than letting it roam free.ā
Gertrude: āJust so long as he doesnāt chew through the reins.ā
Jon: āYeah well, Iāll be the first one burned if that happensā and he holds up his charred hand with a shrug.
So begins the most messed up courting ritual the world has ever seen. Do they work as a couple? Oddly enough, yes. Amazingly well, in fact. Is it a healthy relationship? LOL yeah right. But then thatās rather the point. Jon gave up on that the day he acknowledged that, yes, a part of him liked being the most powerful being roaming a hellish landscape - liked not being vulnerable for once. Back when heād first joined the Institute, post-breakup with Georgie, Jon couldnāt even imagine someone liking him enough to grab a drink after work. Heās past pretending that having the cult-like devotion of a lover, the favor of a Fear god, and the grudging respect of everything else that goes bump in the night isnāt really fucking nice.
Sometimes Elias plays the part of a compassionate human for Jon, as a treat. Sometimes Jon letās Elias bask in anotherās terror, as a treat. Sometimes Jon is Jonathan Sims and sometimes heās The Archivist. āLetās rule a burned-out world togetherā becomes a staple request in their relationship, with Jon always giving Elias the equivalent of a pat on the head and a, āSure, honey. Maybe next week.ā They find something like balance that way.
Plus thereās Gertrude, perpetually in the shadows with an arsenal of weaponry and the promise to obliterate them both if they ever go too far. She reminds Jon of his grandmother when she threatens to fuck them up in the afterlife if they ever make her kill them.
Something, something, dysfunctional eldritch found families are beautiful?
Jon and Elias have achieved something akin to an uncanny, domestic bliss when Elias points out that this body wonāt last forever...
Jon Does Not Like the idea of Elias kidnapping another innocent.
However...
Jon: āYou know Jurgen Leitner is living in the Instituteās tunnels, right?ā
And they lived ever after. The āhappilyā is highly subjective.
Bonus:
Post-apocalypse!Jon meeting with Original!Jon to warn him away from the Institute, painfully thin ever since his coma, hip-length hair streaked unnaturally white, a slew of scars covering every available bit of skin, the slightest green glow behind his eyes, somehow looking supremely confident and powerful while also embodying the most Awkward Academic youāve ever seen: Hey.
Og!Jon: G-good lord!
Jon: Itās okay. You can say āfuck.ā Please say āfuck,ā Jon. We deserve it.
The reason i see jonelias as a twink 4 twink relationship even though elias is imo a fair bit taller is because jonah magnus. Well you know. Twink supreme. He just can't escape his past.