#jerric

Did a little art exchange with @carrionbeast at jemcon!

Just For Fun ~ ~

Who would’ve thought that that Wednesday was the last time that I would be able to talk to you? Your text message was so out of the blue. We haven’t talked for the longest time, and when you texted me, I knew or at least I hoped that we’re finally okay. But our conversation didn’t quite end at a good note. We both know that we wanted to be okay, but there was just something that was getting in the way. “thanks for the memories eventhough they weren’t so great.” I would never forget this line because this was your status message in YM the last time we talked. Eventhough you probably just picked this line from one of FOB’s songs, I knew this line was for me. I didn’t know how to react to it, I didn’t want to look guilty. But no matter what I say or do, I know that I can’t escape the truth. It was a bad night for both of us… I just wished that we didn’t let our pride get the better of us then. It’s been almost 6 months since you passed away… It took me this long to write about you. Until now, I honestly still can’t accept that you’re gone. I hate passing by Connecticut St because I hate seeing your car not parked outside your house anymore. I don't like going to the usual places that you go to and not seeing you there.. During weekends, I still think that you’re just out with your friends, probably in Embassy or Ankies. Maybe this is where regret comes in… If only I knew that my 21st birthday was my last birthday that I would be celebrating with you, I would have spent more time with you that night. If only I knew that New Year 07 was the last New Year’s celebration I would have with you, I would’ve gone with you to Mati even though it was already 3 in the morning. If I only knew that it would be your last birthday celebration last April, I would’ve stayed longer and had I know that this would happen, I would’ve given it another chance… but then again, things happen for a reason… I’ve learned so much from you and I haven’t thanked you for everything you taught me – from eating salad, loving life, to being silly, and to have fun. I’ve known you for almost 9 years and it’s really different not having you around. I’m thankful that I have memories of you, which I still remember vividly – our trips to Tagaytay, Boracay, Cebu, Batangas, etc. You took care of me when I was wasted, sick, looked kadiri after going to derma, visited me when I had chicken pox. You were very sweet and thoughtful, I miss waking up in the morning with a Sausage McMuffin at my bedside. I miss being your alarm clock and waking you up EVERY morning just so you won't be late for class. I miss accompanying you whenever you get a haircut. I miss bugging you, trying to wake you up after I go gym while you're napping so that we could grab a bite, and so much more… If only I had the powers to bring you back to life, just like Ned from “Pushing Daisies”, I would. Even though it would require me to never touch you again. It’s just that you deserve so much more. Life was just beginning for you. You were a great person – someone who looked after the welfare of his friends first. I swear, you’re the only person I know who would be there literally with just one text message, which says “Pnta ka dito, mya ko na sabhin y.” even though it was already 3 in the morning. I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but you’ve touched the lives of so many people. I know you’re in a better place right now, and you’re probably happier. Even though you’re no longer with us physically, I know that you’re still there, looking out for us. I miss you so much. Thank you for everything. You will always have a special place in my heart. This ain't goodbye, Jerric. I'll see you in the next. I’ll always love you. :)