As a dad, he’d be top tier. Almost to a fault. Having a loved one being pregnant is stressful to begin with; being the significant other can be the same and even 100 times more. He’d be nervous but excited. Every week to month excited to see what the ultrasound brings to the table.

Everyday mentally worried about how fast time had flown by. Rattled with anticipation, time had become an irrational fear; asking himself everyday if you both were ready or not. Of course you both were. But being new parents, you overanalyze every single thing. Although just as nervous, he’d be such a comfort. He can’t stop checking in on you and the baby throughout each day.

‘If you and the baby are alright, then I’m alright.’

He had to remind himself those exact words so often so, that whenever he began to seem even slightly tense, too quiet or just off; you’d simply say, “we’re alright.”

He sighed with relief every time he heard it. The way your face warmly smiled at him. Your endless reassurance to him, there was simply no fear that could outdo the twinkle in your eyes and the soothing tone of your voice. You’d always say it so firm but confident.

Without pause, he sat down close to you holding your hand in his. He tells you that he knew that you would be the most amazing mother. You were already the most amazing person to him to begin with.

Speechless, you just let the tears flow and rest your head on his shoulder as he pulls you closer to hold you. You can feel the drops of tears fall onto the crown of your head as he sheds his own happy tears with you.

Days that had been long filled with doubt and emotions began to fall in line with the same love those words held.

You’d both be able to finally enjoy the moments of each day that no longer passed with a painful anticipation; but in turn a grateful appreciation of every second. Laughing at your new bizarre cravings in unison. Sharing excitement in the new obscure object that the baby had grown to the equivalent of with each new ultrasound.

And of course being taken care of by him every single day. No matter what it was. Making your favorite comfort food. Being there to hold you while you cried when hormones got the best of you, resting your feet on his lap to ease the swelling. It was so simple and sweet.

He’d spend a lot of his free time in the nursery. He did it all, from assembling the crib to repainting the walls. Arranging all the gifts from your baby shower. Completely dedicated to organizing and detailing it just the way you would have wanted. Truly sparing no effort to make it a special labor of love. Both of you admired the love and care put into every aspect of it all.

One day in particular hit you the hardest. Whilst walking past the nursery you stopped and watched in silence. He sat cross legged on the floor with crafting supplies surrounding him, entirely consumed with focus. It was the simple but sentiment filled moment of seeing him baby-book every single thing that had brought you two together and to that very moment.

He was pulled out of his own focus from the sound of you sniffling. As he turned to see you, he scrambled to cover it in a poor attempt to hide it. Explaining how it was supposed to be a surprise, he finally caved with your endless begging to see it.

You both sat on the floor of the nursery page by page reminiscing over every detail- from the first date you shared, the first copy of the key he gave you to his place. To every anniversary, every holiday. And of course, the most recent pages had been filled with each ultrasound picture and doctor visit. Even all of your newest cravings.

Reaching the last filled out pages, you’re left with only the remaining blank ones. All you can do is smile ear to ear at him.

“I can’t wait to see what we get to put in the rest of all these pages together.” You remark, while he smiles even more. Sharing the same excitement,

Looking down at the kitchen floor you honestly think it seems like a good enough place to just lay down and fall asleep. You could probably fall asleep standing up if you closed your eyes for long enough.

Instead, you opt to grab a glass of water, some Tylenol, and ibuprofen. Even the stairs seem too much of a chore to go up to. Your bed just a dozen or so stairs away waiting for you; practically unused for two nights straight. ‘It can wait another night.’ your actions mirroring the notion as you shuffle over to the couch and carelessly fall back into the cushions.

Finally shutting your tired eyes. No tv. No sound. No nothing. Just an ironic poetic backdrop of nothingness to fall into as your dream contains of the exact same things. Just nothing, really. Even your brain is too worn down to think up anything memorable to show you in your sleep.

Checking the notifications on his phone for the tenth time, he’s kind of fed up with the pit in his stomach that’s been growing since the last time he’s heard from you earlier that day. Grabbing his keys, phone, and wallet. After making sure his own house is set, he’s already in his car. Tapping his fingers anxiously on the wheel to a non existent rhythm, he pulls into your driveway. Using his own key to unlock your door and let himself in like usual.

But it was unusually quiet and dark. ‘Not even a lamp on?’ He pauses briefly in place, immediately noticing a soft yet barely audible snore coming from the couch. His phone’s light leads the way to the sound. He can’t help but hurt a little (a lot) looking at you passed out on your couch.

Your phone’s alarms impeccable timing even blaring out at first, desperately labeled for you to ‘wake up’. But you being you, you press the lock button in your sleep silencing it. Even unconsciously not wanting to be woken up. You look so peaceful but so exhausted in the saddest way and at the same time.

“oh, sweetheart…” is all that’s said; spoken in a sad sigh composed of an empathetic heartbreak for you. He pauses again, effortlessly compiling a plan of action he knows you’d do for him and had done for him before. As you sleep like a rock- within 30 minutes Jeremy’s already placed a DoorDash order, set out your coziest pjs, and called your work letting them know there’d been a “family emergency” and that you “weren’t going to be in tomorrow”- something about a sick relative out of town. Of course writing down what was said, just in case anyone pestered you with details. Or rather, since you would probably worry people would pester you with details.

Soon after, he’s gathered your favorite go-to takeout making it look nice, and setting it on the coffee table along with turning on a dim but warm lamp. After staring at the choices on the tv he settles on a favorite comfort show for you. Before hitting play, he has another genius idea. He goes upstairs to snatch your favorite pillow and blanket from your room before bringing it back to gently lay it on you. He sets the pillow on his lap and gently rests your head down and you instantly curl up into him pulling the blanket up to your chin. Still blissfully asleep he’d rather you just get more sleep than bother you to wake up and eat right away.

He grabs the remote and presses play as you relaxed into him even more so while he’s absentmindedly trailing his fingers through your hair. He can’t help but look down in awe at how peaceful and comfortable you look. Not knowing how long it’s been since you’d slept he honestly didn’t care if it killed him not to move as long as you could stay as content as you looked right now.

After an episode had passed you’d started to wake up a bit. You can’t help but jolt awake with the feeling of panic. The fear-fueled list rushing through your head of everything that sleep had instantly devoured. It sped like a check list all at once; sleeping in to begin with, sleeping through all your alarms (again), ‘I forgot to reply to Jeremy’, what time is it?’ ‘am I late for work?’ ‘did I sleep all night?’

Everything just stopped though. As soon as you started to stir awake and heard, “hey hey hey, everything’s alright- you just took a short nap.” Your heartbeat finally beginning to slow down. An instant anvil amount of weight lifting off your chest, letting out the biggest sigh of relief. His calm and reassuring tone, the gentle waves of hair he’d resumed moving his fingers through helping put the air back into your lungs.

Your head fell right back onto the pillow on his lap. You rubbed at your eyes, resting your hands there. “I’m honestly so fucking sorry, I didn’t mean to sleep in, I meant to text you when I got home-“ “I know, I know, and it’s okay.” His face matched his voice in pure genuineness.

“How long has it been since you actually slept?”

“Probably about two days maybe…” answering as honestly as you can remember.

“I’m so sorry, hun.” His thumb rubbing circles on your hand as he sighed

“Well, you’ve got time to catch up on it now.” He adds

“I hope you don’t mind, but I kind of called off work for you tomorrow-“

“What? What’d you do?” The concern instantly returning to your face

“It’s fine- I just told them a family emergency came up and you weren’t gonna be able to make it in tomorrow, I wrote everything down. Don’t panic! I got our stories straight” With every ounce of sincerity, he still couldn’t help but chuckle a little, and you couldn’t help but laugh either.

“Okay, yeah, I think I can spin that.”

“I think you can- shall we continue?” He asks gesturing to the tv, jokingly.

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s continue.” You laugh back

Until he stops to stare at you seriously “Wait wait wait. Under one condition…”

“What’s the condition?”

“That you take some time off for yourself. I know you picked up more shifts than you needed to, and you’re genuinely working yourself too much. I want you to care about yourself as much as I do. Please?”

“You’re right, I’ve been ‘fuck it we ballin’ so much that I balled too much and it kinda fucked me. So yeah, easy deal. I accept the condition.” Saying it so seriously had the both of you laughing. Ending the night on a much better note than it had started.

It was your idea to go to a local record store after you were surprised by a beyond thoughtful Christmas gift from him earlier that holiday. He’d gotten you a new record player- not only new but a good one.

Your heart melted when you opened the wrapping paper to see that he’d gone so out of his way to get you something special and significant to you. You had an extensive collection of records from your favorite bands, even limited editions and pressings with incredible designs and colors. He thought it was so precious that you would show them to him. He’d sit there listening to you and looking at each one with a smile on his face. Whenever he’d stop in your office and both of you would fall into a rabbit hole of music, he’d always had remembered that when you would take them out, you wished you could play them, but you never did- you were too worried your old record player would scratch them and ruin them.

The mental note he took from that months ago leading up to the gift was so thoughtful. He hadn’t asked you about it or hinted at anything regarding it. He wanted it to be a good surprise. And it most definitely was. He spent a lengthy amount of time looking into ‘what the best record player was’, and especially the most reliable one, not wanting your records to get ruined. Just wanting you to finally be able to play them without worry; finally being able to just simply enjoy the music you loved so much.

After your excitement opening his gift and him setting it up with a good speaker, (and telling you “babe, let me do it I’m an expert, I promise.” sarcastically.) You’d started playing them all.

Over the days and months that would pass, he loved hearing your music echo throughout the house. No matter what he was doing, even while just on his computer and catching up on work, any small inconvenience would disappear as he listened to the sound of your favorite songs start playing. It made him smile ear to ear. Every single time.

And although he wasn’t much into music himself,

he was very much into yours.

After a while you’d asked while out on a random excursion in Vegas if you could stop by a record store and pick up some new stylus’ for the record player. He was more than happy to go with you and also explore the store with you as you both looked around. The amount of records was overwhelming to him as he browsed, so he went looking for what he really only knew well. Meanwhile, you went up to the store owner and asked for the specific part you were looking for.

After finding the replacement needed, you turn to see him flicking through the records absentmindedly. That was until he made it to the ‘G’ section and after moving a couple records you can see his hand stop. Pulling his other hand out of his pocket to reach out to pull the record out of the box.

You can see he’s holding a Gorrilaz album and you watch as he looks at it, flipping it over and reading the tracklist. His face in practical awe of his favorite albums of all time.

“Hey, whatchya find?” You ask him curiously

“Oh it’s- they have a Gorillaz album or two” he turns and replies but almost immediately stopping himself from trying to sound too excited.

“Did you, uh find the stylus?” He asks changing the subject.

“Yeah, I did I bought a couple replacements just in case.” You say smiling

“Awesome, where to next?” He asks smiling at you

“Well hold on. What about the Gorillaz album? Don’t you want it?” Asking him sincerely

“Oh uh- nah” he says casually. “Just checking out the artwork.” He adds while looking away.

His face is burning. And he’s praying you don’t notice.

But of course you do. You just don’t let him know it.

You don’t completely understand his reluctance to share something like an album with you. But knowing he isn’t that into music- you chalk it up to being maybe something he just didn’t want to open up to you about yet. It is sort of the ‘one thing’ he doesn’t have in common with you: that being an extensive love for music.

You choose not to push it… But keep a mental note of it. It’s honestly just so cute to you. The thought of him being too embarrassed to admit he wanted the album? You can’t. It didn’t need to make sense for it to absolutely melt your heart. Something you seem to find he makes new ways of doing every second you’re with him.

As the both of you leave to head out of the store, him being a gentleman, wordlessly shows an open palm to you, gesturing towards the bag you’re holding and motions a ‘gimme gimme’ to you with a sweet little smirk. You hand it over to him with a laugh, looking up at him with a big smile and a “thank you”.

As you continue walking, his other arm follows around the back of your waist and pulls you into him as he presses his lips onto your head.

“You’re welcome, love.”

———————————————————————————

Days went by as he’d stay clueless to during that day you’d have a surprise in store for him that upcoming Valentine’s Day. You had bought him the albums while checking out of the store, asking the store owner to charge you for them then and to put them aside for you to come and pick up the following day. The owner was more than happy to do just that.

That Valentine’s Day you’d surprised him with some red wine and both took a moment to laugh realizing he did the same thing. You both gave each other a glass of the wine from the bottle you’d bought for one another and gave a sounding clink and a ‘cheers’ to each other. You had made his favorite pasta for dinner that night for the two of you. You lit some candles on the coffee table, enjoyed your pasta together, and cuddled up with him watching a movie. Both of you loving a chill romantic evening together on the couch, just watching a movie and enjoying being in one another’s arms.

As the movie finished, you decide to play blackjack together. Watching his fingers shuffle the cards you couldn’t not stop smiling at him biting his lip like he always did while he’s focusing. Resting your face against your hand you told him that you’d ‘be right back’, and ‘that this deserved some good music.’ He smiled and chuckled at you as you got up to go upstairs to your record player. He agreed and went to fill up your wine glasses.

As he’s pouring the wine he asks you ‘what’s on the track list tonight, dj?’ You had to throw your hand over your mouth to stop from laughing, trying so hard to sound serious when you replied: “Well, I was gonna play some TV Girl, but shit! I think the record player’s broken- can you help me, babe?”

As he quickly thumped up the stairs he was mentally devastated by the idea that your new record player had broken- unbeknownst to him however, you quickly put the Plastic Beach record onto the turntable, turned the player on and waited till the perfect moment for him to come in the room.

You were holding the needle ready to place it onto the already spinning record as he turned the corner into your office with two wine glasses in his hands and a concerned yet sad look on his face.

Dropping the needle onto the right track (thank god, tipsy enough that you hoped it wouldn’t land on a different track, although funny, you wanted it to be a good surprise), the record player began playing ‘On Melancholy Hill’.

He stopped dead in his tracks and looked at you, then around the room. Looking at the candles you had lit, his brain finally realizing what you had been up to and what he was hearing.

He couldn’t help the smile and giggle he let out.

“Really?” He asked stuck in a hilarious disbelief you went through to this sweet extent to surprise him.

“Yeah, really” you chimed back to him while chuckling.

You walked up to him and gently took the glasses out of his hands while taking a sip out of one and then placing them on your desk.

Still stuck in surprise, his eyes following you and then down to your hand that was now reached out towards him. He chuckled at you as you motioned the same ‘gimme gimme’ to him with your hand.

He slowly walked over to you reaching for your hand and paused. Looking at you as sincerely as you’ve ever seen him do. He rubs his thumb slowly across your knuckles pressing his lips to them softly. Gently pulling the same hand to move you close to him while placing it onto his shoulder in a smooth motion. Winding another arm around your waist to hold you and begin to sway you slowly, not even to the beat of the song, but to the rhythm of his absolute joy in the moment. A beat you more than happily moved to along with him as your head rests against his chest.

The two of you slow dance in each other’s arms in the dimly lit room.

The only pause was Jeremy. Stopping to look you in the eyes, dead serious, to ask: “There’s nothing actually wrong with your record player though, right?”

You can’t stop laughing at his clueless but sweet question, struggling to answer “No, there was nothing wrong with it to begin with.”

But he gets the jist as he starts laughing himself.

He continues moving with you through the laughter to dip you to your surprise, taking the moment to laugh at your surprise. Then as he brings you back up, he places a soft hand under your chin tilting your head up and slowly leaning in to kiss you softly.

Maybe it was the wine, maybe it was being suddenly tipped over, but it was the sweetest, most butterfly-in-the stomach kiss you’d ever shared and it made your head swim in the best way possible.

As the night ended, you both went to bed late, you both had been too busy having fun listening to the albums you’d surprised him with, and the time spent together to care. Now in bed you both cuddled up together and before you fell asleep he pulled you closer to his chest, as he thanked you for the surprise all you could do was look up at him and tell him the same. Engulfed in his arms he rested his head on top of yours.

“I love you, y/n” he hummed into your hair

“I love you too, j” you replied wholeheartedly