Jae2 WIP
He likes listening to Youngjae breathe while he sleeps beside him; it was a sort of dreamlike experience to watch the light lift and fall of his partners chest, every breath inhaled and exhaled reassuring him that, yes, he is real. That his lover wasn’t going anywhere. It calms his uneasy heart to be able to reach out and know that he’d be there to grab on to. Sometimes, when the dark corners of his mind fight their way to the surface, he almost believes that a day will come when he’ll wake up without him by his side. He knows it’s an irrational fear of his, to be plagued with this shameful darkness each morning he wakes but there’s nothing he can do to stop the tight and suffocating feeling that crushes his chest whenever the thought arises. It becomes paranoia at times, when he starts believing that Youngjae really could disappear at any given moment, within the blink of an eye.
It’s become a habit to watch him, studying him till there was nothing else to memorize. Jaebum doesn’t know when he started this strange and, quite frankly, weird routine of gaping at his boyfriend’s serene expression. Maybe it was the fact that most days, he could hardly believe this angel in his arms wasn’t a figment of his imagination. Or maybe, just maybe, he feared the worst of his terrors would become reality, that he’ll wake one day and find nothing in his arms.
Yes, that was a truly terrifying thought.
(Something i may or may not expand on due to the lack of jae2 in my other fics @Kay_jay88 on ao3)
