5/24/19
“i’m sorry i’m blowing up your phone but it’s for whenever lmao fuck i’ve tried rehearsing everything i want to say to you for months now and nothing seems perfect because that’s what you are to me. i’m sorry i didn’t go yesterday i was kind of avoiding you because i am nervous out of my mind. i thought i was calm, cool and collected but i’m not. how could i be? you are the most amazing, tender soul i’ve ever been graced with in my short existence. i’m crying right now because i love you so much. i’m terrible at surprises, especially when it comes to you. when something happens to me you’re the first person i want to call but i stop myself. i’m not doing so great right now. i’m shaking like your mom’s dumb dog. you are the best thing in my life alexis arianna, my whole fucking world. i’ve haven’t been able to love somebody fully in such a long time it almost feels like i never have before. you’re a dream come true. you are so incredibly smart, i think you’re brilliant. you’re understanding beyond belief, you see the best even when others might not see anything at all. you thank me for being patient and amazing but i’ve always tried my best to be what you deserve. even if i’m not much now i promise you i’m time i will be something great. i haven’t had much to give since we met but i’ve given you whatever i had and i’ll always do that. you stumble on some words but i think that matches how you are. nothing keeps you from becoming the best you could be. nothing can keep you from what you want. you have this fire in your soul and now everything is in this new light. like you told me, you’re not the air that i breathe. but i don’t ever want to see a moment without you. i want to share the best things in this life with you. i know you can make yourself happy but i want to do that for you too. i don’t know how i ever went a day without hearing your laugh. you break me down in the best way. i am so so incredibly weak for you even if at times it doesn’t seem like it. especially lately because i’ve been trying to avoid you so i could stay chill for all of this but that didn’t work out lmao i see you and i fall apart. my brain blanks when we’re together and i can’t seem to figure out what to say or do. i’m saying all of this now because i want you to know and when the time comes i really don’t think i’ll be able to say anything without stuttering. i don’t want this with anybody else.”
my girlfriend proposed to me in May.
it’s a start of something beautiful ,
I know we’re going to do great things.
