this is something i do
i get too close, microscopic, to a level at which endearing flaws begin to make me nauseous and then i recoil and i hurt and i hurt them well i would hurt them if they were at all aware but it seems these people that i chew up and spit out tend to come with a persistent lack of perception
i should know when to leave things when to let sitting dogs lie far away from me because although this time it isn't sex that did it its still letting someone in, in that way that makes them think i mean something more than i ever will and its always been so easy to make em fall a little in love and prob a lil bit hate me because i would hate me too
but really what do you expect if we make plans to cook dinner and then your sink and counters are all covered in dishes and every pot is dirty and i wash two and scrape out a space to chop veggies and put these sausages in the cast iron skillet and make a stirfry and a little kohlrabi salad and then clean up the compost and put the leftovers into a bowl (which i also have to wash) and the only contribution you make is to get stoned and tell me i'm not cooking the sausages right with yr lovely bravado, yeah fluff your feathers and crack jokes with your friend who is also stoned and going on about his excellent farmlife diet start drinking and the best worst part is how can i be mad at you when this is who you are who i have always known you to be














