#iteacheighth

In order to show you what I mean when talking about influencing students lives I would like to share a story with you about a young man I connected with over the last year.

He is a kind young man with a big heart who was seeking acknowledgement in all the wrong ways. I am sure you know the type if you have ever been in a classroom. He would talk out, act silly, play the class clown, and just generally gave all this teachers a huge headache. But as you watched him you also saw the depth of his kindness towards others and a child seeking someone to show him love.

As the semester went on we finally got some of his behavior issues ironed out and he has become one of the best students in class, incredibly engaged, asking solid questions, and scoring better on his assessments. One of the things that has had such a major impact on his transformation is that he has recently found out he is going to be adopted. He has been in the foster care system for a long while now and had been carrying this fear of rejection. He was just waiting for this foster parent to realize he wasn’t worth keeping. I’ll never forget the day he came into class and said that he had been told he was being adopted. I had never seen his face so alive.

As the fall continued I began interviewing students for a project on harassment occurring at our school or in the community around. The students really got into this project. They dove head first into creating a campaign to raise awareness about harassment as well as to create skits and videos to help show others the types of harassment that occurs in schools. They also took this  a step further and did positivity speeches that built people up even after people have been speaking ill of them. This young man jumped into the project with full force! He was leading the charge; acting in the skits, writing the skits, speaking in front of a room of 200 parents, presented the project to 500+ parents, business partners, and community leaders. He also came in and shared an instance of bullying he had experienced. As we were talking he said “I’m not really sure if this fits into the project we are doing but I would really like to talk about something if that’s ok.” I had NO idea what was getting ready to be shared with me. This sweet young man shared with me how he was afraid to accept love from his future adoptive family because he was afraid they were going to leave like everyone else had done before. Insert my heart breaking and tears falling. I was completely unprepared for how this was going to impact how I viewed all the misbehavior from August and September. So I sat there with him telling him how he needed to be ok being vulnerable and allowing his new family to love him because they would see the same young man I was seeing in that moment. I talked to him through tears and in broken sentences trying to impart to him how special we all thought he was and how if he allowed them the chance they would see it too.

Since then I am happy to report they have set a date for his adoption, which is quickly approaching. His behavior has been a little off recently but he pulled me aside today to tell me that he is just so anxious he hasn’t been able to really focus on anything else over the last month. I pulled him into the hallway the other morning just to have a chat about him staying focused and he was just such a ball of nervous energy he could hardly stand still. I can’t imagine the level of excitement, fear, and anticipation he is facing right now. It makes me anxious for him but I know that this will be just the right kind of change and stability he needs to grow into a highly successful, kind, and intelligent young man.

Recently this young man received a letter inviting him to attend a youth leadership conference over the summer. This letter came directly following his ADOPTION! I think he was pleasantly surprised because he is often the student who is overlooked for things like this because he can be a tad excitable. The nominating teacher had moved schools over winter break so I asked the students to write a thank you letter if they wanted to and I explained to them that in the adult world it would be appropriate to thank someone for honoring you. Before sending the letters I wanted to read them to ensure no one wrote anything inappropriate (They are 13-14 after all). His was incredibly moving. He was so grateful in his letter and I sat and thought to myself about how something so small can make such a deep impact on students. That letter, which he may not even go to the conference, could have altered the path he will follow as he grows into an adult. Having had that boost of confidence may push him to achieve more and to push for academic success in the future.