#issavent

I’m not sure who crept inside of me and told me to hustle hard this week!! 

But i’m completely grateful. I’m finally in position to do something that I’ve been wanting to do for a while since I heard it was possible.

I am grateful for the humble beginnings of being lost and having to figure things out. I am no where near my beginning and I have a lot more work to do, but Ya’ll I’m grateful. 

I was afraid of this transition in my life. I felt like I was going backwards in life. I was ( and still a bit) sad about my previous relationship turn out, I moved back in with my family, I reached a stagnant point in my creativity, and I felt like I had to rebuild my perception of my self-esteem. I felt like this transition would be TERRIBLE. But to be honest I’ve grown so much from the whole ordeal. I’ve had unspeakable support from people that surprised me. I got to reconnect with my family in a way that I can’t help, but be grateful for.

And lastly the bonding time and healing time I’ve had with my sisters during this time has truly given me a new lease on forgiveness and life. I realized that I had a lot of unresolved anger and hurt stemming from fear of rejection and feeling like I wasn’t enough. I had time to look at my triggers. I had time to acknowledge my role in the life I was upset about. I had to learn accountability and practice empathy with the people closest to me. 

It’s been a good year in hindsight lol. I grew sooooooo much. I learned sooooo much. I even permitted myself to love in a way that I never thought possible. So i’m grateful. I did things that were new. I put myself out there and got to see a sample of what I was made of. I continue to pray that Yahweh keeps my head and steps, but I can’t help, but say Thank You.