to me, Relationships mean alot to me. Not just romantic, but friendships and family relationships too. The people close to me are so special to me and when they get close i become attached, slightly possessive and care deeply for them. And then when they turn their back on me i get angry fast and become hurt, so hurt that i want to cry and never talk to them again.
Sometimes,, i believe i am one of those toys that people enjoy then when all of the trick dont work anymore, people get bored of me, thanks lorde, and its true. I think when im around a person for too long they get sick of me and stop trying. and that makes me so mad, it makes me insides hot and makes me want to do something with my hands but i cant because im so hurt. I put my all into everything i do, including relationships, i want them to work, i want both of us to be on the same page, to be happy, but when one member of the party pulls back, makes other plans, cancels plans, i feel like at this point its a fucking broken record and im sick and tired of waiting around for someone who obviously doesnt seem to give a damn, {if they do they really fucking suck at doing it}, and start moving on to better things, better people.
It’s hard. when you know. when you can feel the separation and that feeling in your chest like everytime they turn you away, you feel the bond you once shared get thinner and thinner til theres nothing but a small string connecting the two of you. the question is, who will be the first to fix things?
