#intermitting

No, you definitely won’t; most people mind their own business and wouldn’t lose respect for you as a person just because of your first year grades. (Also, more people 2.2 than you realise: it happens, you’re not a failure!)

In any case I think it’s possible to opt out of appearing on the class lists: don’t know if it’s too late to arrange it for this academic year, but you should at least ask your DoS about it, your mental health/grades are your own business and there’s nothing wrong with keeping your privacy.

Oh no, honey, I’m so sorry to hear this! I think it may be worth emailing your tutor about this -- explain that you’re not sure you can do exam term without support, that you’re seriously considering intermission as a last-ditch option, but as you’d prefer not to, you were wondering whether there were any options still available to you. If you’ve got a tutor who isn’t great/doesn’t reply, get straight in contact with the senior tutor of your college. They should have a better, more detailed understanding of the avenues available to you, and should be able to guide you and help you make your decision. 

First of all, I’m really sorry to hear about your father. Our thoughts are with him, and with your family.

(part 2). I find myself craving a more *normal* uni experience, with less pressure. Thing is, I have had some really happy moments here, but at the end of the day I'm crying at least once every two days because of stress, and don't think I have the motivation to persevere with my subject. Obviously people have good days and bad days, but I've struggled mentally in the past, and don't want to jeopardise it, even if it is Cam. Do yo have any advice/thoughts on this? Sorry for the rant x

I don’t think it sounds arrogant at all, anon, not at all. And there’s no need to apologise.

You are not the first person to feel like they were pushed by family/teachers/friends into going to Oxbridge when they’re not sure it’s really what they wanted. There’s nothing wrong with feeling like that, I doubt there is any university in the world that would be an ideal environment for absolutely everyone, and it’s often difficult to follow your own feelings when the reputation factor is so strong.

That said, I think it’s still too soon to say whether this is just a tough first term, or a sign that you would be happier at a different uni. You may well have the power to overcome this and enjoy it far more later on. I definitely think you should talk to your personal tutor, or somebody else in college you feel comfortable discussing your feelings with: you do not immediately have to make the decision to intermit/drop out, but you can voice your worries and have somebody advise you on what things might help you settle in and manage the stress better. Things like being disorganised and struggling with the pace - it’s possible to learn how to be better at these things, I promise you are capable of it. It just takes time. There’s nothing to be ashamed of in deciding you’re not at home there, but I think it’s probably worth pushing on a bit further to see what happens.