#incoherences

·         Scars come in useful. I have one myself above my left knee which is a perfect map of the London Underground. (Why??? And another Map like the Marauders’? How is Harry’s scar useful? Is it related to the war against Grindelwald – you know how England had to go underground to protect themselves against bombs?)

·         Why did the snake in the zoo open its eyes when Harry came? Did it read Harry’s thoughts just then?

·         A snake can’t wink though? Except if it’s a magical species?

·         How can a snake speak Brazilian if it’s speaking Parseltongue? And if it never knew Brazil, then how did it know Brazilian words? Magic only?

·         How could Harry have been locked up in his cupboard for his longest-ever punishment from Dudley’s birthday until the summer hols without any mention of the teachers noticing? Did the Dursleys invent an excuse? How actually long was the punishment?

·         How are the Durlseys getting so many expensive things for Dudley???

·         If the Dursleys hate Harry so much, why do they try to keep him in the house instead of hurrying to send him away to Hogwarts? Why are they trying to stamp out “that dangerous nonsense “(magic)?

·         Why do they precise “The Smallest Bedroom”, and is it precised from how much time the person spend Harry in it the last day, or from what Harry considers his bedroom? Does this mean a letter can actually be sent to ‘The Toilet’ if you happen to spend your diarrhea-day on the seat?

·         Harry wanted to leave the house as to wait for the postman’s Hogwarts’ letters in the street, but how would he do this without the key?

·         Why is it that Hagrid knocked right at midnight, when there is clear suspicion he had been outside for five, three, two minutes? Why is he coming only for Harry’s birthday, not before? Is it because they waited for an answer until time was up? Also, if he knew Harry wasn’t getting his letters, why didn’t he come sooner or something? Did he really have to wait until the 31th of July?

·         Mr H. Potter, The Floor, Hut-on-the-Rock (How?!)

·         Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that – that school – and came home every holiday with her pockets full of frog-spawn, turning teacups into rats. (But magic’s not allowed out of school? Did Lily have a frog?)

·         Hagrid says he flew to the shack on the rock. Flew with what?

·         Hagrid is forbidden from doing magic and worse, he’s not supposed to do it since he’s got Harry, but somehow when he uses magic the Ministry doesn’t detect it. Maybe it’s because it’s in front of another Wizard only?

·         Hagrid is good at non-verbals, damn. Why though?

·         Gringotts vaults are hundreds of miles under London, then there’s no reason they’d be cold. The vaults are dug hundreds of miles underground – which is quite a feat as they would reach the asthenosphere in the superior coat at least and then inferior coat – then the temperature should reach 100 Kelvin by the first hundred of km; it reaches 1800K by 200 km, the pressure becomes unbearable, and London should fall without underground to support the buildings above, so the Goblins better make those warding cooling spells hard. Also is it why Dumbledore has a map of the London Underground…?)

·         Students may also bring an owl OR a cat OR a toad. (But Ron and his older brothers had a rat?)

·         A stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework. (Gryffindor already? Or phoenix?)

·         The train pulled out of the station. Harry wanted to watch Hagrid until he was out of sight; he rose in his seat and pressed his nose against the window, but he blinked and Hagrid had gone. (Did Hagrid just give the ticket to Harry with no explanation, then left alone an 11 yo boy in a train with lots of baggage – including funny-shaped packages and a sleeping snowy owl that people gawp at – expecting him to go back to the Dursleys safely, and directly???)

·         “Now, what’s the platform number?” said the boys’ mother [Molly]. (How can you not know???)

·         So Molly could afford new robes for Percy but not Ron’s own wand? Oh boy.

·         Can’t you just sell a gold Galleon somewhere in the Muggle World (in Romania if needed) and then convert all the money you’d get into Galleons? Can’t you duplicate common Muggle objects, eggs, etc, and sell them? Can’t you take Muggle money, duplicate it a lot, then have it converted into Galleons – if needed you exchange the banknotes/pieces with the Muggles’ so they won’t be found identical by the Goblins? Can’t you Reparo robes? Prepare Potions and cure people so you get money that you exchange? CAN’T YOU DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR MAGIC

·         Famous Witches and Wizards. I’ve got about five hundred, but I haven’t got Agrippa or Ptolemy. (How could they afford 500 Chocolate Frogs?)

·         I’ve tried a few simple spells just for practice and it’s all worked for me. (When did you try? You couldn’t have at home, and I’m not sure you can test them in Diagon Alley safely… Upon arriving in the train? How is it they instantly worked? Is it the difference between the longer spells – like Ron’s rhythmic one – and your simple ones? Anyway, pretentious)

·         Goyle reached towards the Chocolate Frogs next to Ron – Ron leapt forward, but before he’d so much as touched Goyle, Goyle let out a horrible yell. Scabbers the rat was hanging on his finger, sharp little teeth sunk deep into Goyle’s knuckle – Crabbe and Malfoy backed away as Goyle swung Scabbers round and round, howling, and when Scabbers finally flew off and hit the window, all three of them disappeared at once.

I think he’s been knocked out, Ron said to Harry. He looked closer at Scabbers. No – I don’t believe it – he’s gone back to sleep.

And so he had. (But Ron??? When you “go back to sleep” it means someone’s been knocked out???)

·         He says Malfoy’s father didn’t need an excuse to go over to the Dark Side. (What’s this formulation?)

·         Why doesn’t any child know about Hogwarts’ Sorting ceremony, although they know about Houses?

·         What looked like a fat little monk was saying, “Forgive and forget, I say, we ought to give him a second chance –“ (about Peeves.)

My dear Friar, haven’t we given Peeves all the chances he deserves? He gives us all a bad name and you know, he’s not really even a ghost. (A monk? A friar? How??? Aren’t they anti religious/Christian because of the hunts? Was he considered a heretic?) (Poltergeists are those who ruin the ghosts’ reputation)

·         Do ghosts who died hundred of years ago use ancient terms or learn the new language? Why isn’t the Wizards’ language more ancient though?

·         I’ll eat myself if you can find a smarter hat than me. (But you’re the only talking hat??? Dude?)

·         So many meals, where do they go when they’re not eaten? Where do they get the food?

·         No moderation for the children’ meals. It’s a wonder they didn’t start to fatten up too.

·         Scabbers because Scabby, because scabs on the toe? Or on the whole body?

·         Perhaps Harry had eaten a bit too much, because he had a very strange dream. He was wearing Professor Quirell’s turban, which kept talking to him, telling him he must transfer to Slytherin at once, because it was his destiny. Harry told the turban he didn’t want to be in Slytherin; it got heavier and heavier; he tried to pull it off but it tightened painfully – and there was Malfoy, laughing at him as he struggles with it – then Malfoy turned into the hook-nosed teacher, Snape, who laugh became high and cold – there was a burst of green light and Harry woke, sweating and shaking. (Why? What does that dream mean? What’s its purpose? How to interpret it in retrospection? Does it only serve to empathize how Harry chose not to be in Slytherin even though it was his destiny (really?), maybe a foreshadowing to the Horcrux, cast Malfoy and Snape as villains and potential threats? But why give Snape a laugh – he never laughed – why mockery when classes haven’t even started, why give him Voldemort’s laugh?)

·         Filch found them trying to force their way through a door which unluckily turned out to be the entrance to the out-of-bounds corridor on the third floor. (no warning sign?)

·         They had noticed that a funny smell hung around the turban, and the Wealsey twins insisted that it was stuffed full of garlic as well, so that Quirell was protected wherever he went. (1) students notice smells from a turban, 2) is Quirell’s head rotting?)

·         Why hasn’t Dumbledore given a finer house to Hagrid?

·         They can afford limitless amounts of food but somehow can’t replace the broomsticks?

·         Neville, his face tear-streaked, clutching his wirst, hobbled off with Madam Hooch, who had her arm around him. (Hooch, are you telling me that in a class where a student has every opportunity to fall off their broom you don’t have ANY medicine on you, like something for the pain or wounds or broken bones? You literally have magical potions in your world.)

·         Neville wasn’t back from the hospital wing for the night – why? A little Skele-Grow and everything’s fine?

·         Hermione had turned to the portrait of the Fat Lady to get back inside and found herself facing an empty painting. The Fat Lady had gone on a night-time visit and Hermione was locked out of Gryffindor Tower. (WHAT)

·         What do they think they’re doing, keeping a thing like that locked up in a school? Said Ron finally. If any dogs needs exercise, that one does. (The dog is forced to stay here… abuse?)

·         At seven o’clock it is meant to be dusk… And Harry’s going to fly in the night?

·         The goals are fifty meters high, which is the size of a 4 levels house (+ “base” room). It’s enough to kill, but it mostly harms a lot? They’re not that high compared to the movies.

·         The Snitch is difficult to see but Harry has no problem despite having to wear poor glasses? Were they ever repaired in PS? No. Occulus Reparo only appears in CoS. That was corrected in the films.

·         And there’s no time limit. Why the fuck haven’t they included a time limit? Three months! Three months of playing and sleeping only – were they students?

·         A thousand live bats fluttered from the walls and ceiling while a thousand more swooped over the tables in low black clouds, making the candles in the pumpkins stutter. (But bats often carry deadly diseases such as rage?)

·         I just thought – Hermione.

What about her?

She doesn’t know about the troll.

Ron bit his lip. Oh, all right, he snapped. But Percy’d better not see us. (BUT are you stupid Ronald??? Why not tell him???)

·         The key’s in the lock, Harry muttered. We could lock it in. (But it’s a goddamn 12 feet tall TROLL, a door and a lock won’t resist!)

·         Flushed with their victory they started to run back up the passage, but as they reached the corner they heard smoothing that made their hearts stop – a high, petrified scream – and it was coming from the chamber they’d just locked up. (Do they leave a key on the girls’ TOILET’S DOOR which can be closed from OUTSIDE?)

·         Harry then did something that was both very brave and very stupid: he took a great running jump and managed to fasten his arms around the troll’s neck from behind. (1) he did the exact same thing with Vernon, 2) did you just jump 12 FEET into the air?)

·         [The club] dropped, with a sickening crack, on to its owner’s head.

Is it – dead?

I don’t think so, said Harry. I think it’s just been knocked out. (What?! The sickening crack, nothing? Scabbers 2.0 but Harry’s the stupid one)

·         I went looking for the troll because I – I thought I could deal with it on my own – you know, because I’ve read all about them. (HERMIONE YOU FUCKING IDIOT, WHY ARE YOU EVEN DOING THIS)

·         Hermione Granger, telling a downright lie to a teacher? (WHAT IN THE NAME OF DUMBASSERY)

·         They didn’t have time to come and fetch anyone. (THEY HAD)

·         Well – in that case… said Professor McGonagall, staring at the three of them. Miss Granger, you foolish girl, how could you think of tackling a mountain troll on your own?

Harry was speechless. Hermione was the last person to do anything against the rules (ARE YOU SURE), and here she was, pretending she had, to get them out of trouble. (HOW – WHY DIDN’T YOU FUCKING TELL THE TRUTH?!!!!!!!!!!!)

·         Miss Granger, five points will be taken from Gryffindor for this, said Professor McGonagall. (SHE NEARLY KILLED HERSELF, MAYBE IT DESERVES MORE?! ALSO CONGRATS HERMIONE FOR LOSING POINTS USELESSLY)

·         Professor McGonagall turned to Harry and Ron.

You each win Gryffindor five points. Professor Dumbledore will be informed of this. You may go. (THEY SAVED HERMIONE’S ASS BEFORE YOU INCOMPETENTS GIVE THEM A LITTLE MORE DAMMIT!)

·         Good of her to get us out of trouble like that, Ron admitted. (HHOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW?!)

·         She had also lent him Quidditch Through the Ages, which turned out to be a very interesting read. (Does the book belong to her?)

·         OUCH – that must have hurt, hit in the back of the head by a Bludger. (WHAT. Bludgers can break fucking JAWS!)

·         Adrian Pucey (pussy???)

·         Once he caught a sight of a flash of gold but it was just a reflection from one of the Weasleys’ wristwatches. (But they can’t afford wands?)

·         Harry was faster than Higgs. (Harry… or his top-model broom?)

·         ‘All right, all right. Flint nearly kills the Gryffindor Seeker, which could happen to anyone, I’m sure, so a penalty to Gryffindor.’ (So Quidditch CAN kill students?)

·         Marcus Flint seized the Quaffle and scored five times without anyone noticing. (Why isn’t Hooch calling time out for heavens’ sake? A student’s broom is going berserk. Of course a Slytherin would try to score, it’s in their interest and it’s allowed. Don’t talk about nobility and fairness when you have literally anti Slytherin bias and Gryffindor favoritism everywhere.)

·         ‘Neville, you can look!’ Ron said. Neville had been sobbing into Hagrid’s jacket for the last five minutes. (It’s been 5 minutes Harry was being cursed and on the brink of death. 5 minutes where Snape didn’t close his eyes, supposedly.)

·         The few owls that managed to battle their way through the stormy sky to deliver post had to be nursed back to health by Hagrid before they could fly again. (Throwing a ruffle-looking owl into a storm isn’t good Hagrid; sending owls for mail when there’s a storm is quite the animal abuse. They should have invented other ways to communicate. The Floo perhaps? Packages charmed to reach a destination? Apparating near the destination? Plus owls can easily be lost. Great. By the way if you don’t have an owl you can’t communicate, so you’re forced to have one, which increased the risk of animal neglect and abuse.)

·         While the Gryffindor common room and the Great Hall has roaring fires, the draughty corridors had become icy and a bitter wind rattled the windows in the classrooms. (Why don’t you use magic to warm up the classroom and corridors and/or ward off the wind? You’re wizards! If Muggles can isolate schools effectively then you must as well!)

·         Couldn’t Hagrid have warned Dumbledore that the Trio knew about Flamel?

·         ‘What are you looking for, boy?’

‘Nothing’, said Harry. (Oh my God you idiot)

Madam Pince the librarian brandished a feather duster at him.

You’d better get out, then. Go on – out! [From the vicinity of the Restricted Section]

Wishing he’d been a bit quicker at thinking up some story, Harry left the library. (1) I don’t think you needed to leave the library and 2) you invent want to invent a story? Do you think Snape would be even more of a danger if he learned, by all hazards, from Madam Pince, that you searched for a book on Flamel? Idiot)

·         What they needed was a nice long search without Madam Pince breathing down their necks.

‘And you could ask your parents if they know who Flamel is’, said Ron. ‘It’d be safe to ask them.’

Very safe, as they’re both dentists, said Hermione. (Oh my God. And what does the fact your parents are dentists have anything to do with how they’re safe? Why not say “yes they’re away from Snape and they’re Muggles and/or they won’t interfere”? I feel it was a botched attempt from Rowling to tell the readers Hermione’s parents were dentists. The dialogue feels unnatural.)

·         His next present also contained sweets – a large box of Chocolate Frogs from Hermione. (She went to see her Muggle parents. How and when did she get the box of chocolate frogs? Why not send Muggle chocolate?)

·         An Invisibility Cloak allows a student to break rules/curfew more easily than before, and it allows them to spy and stalk. Hormonal teenagers can use it for very wrong things. And yet Dumbledore, who knows Quirell is a threat, gives the Cloak to Harry at Christmas and not later? Just in the name of legacy from the father? Didn’t he regret how James behaved at all?

·         “A grow-your-own-warts kit.” (WHAT. WHAT?)

·         Don’t cats in Hogwarts get into territorial fights?

·         Suddenly, Harry felt wide awake. The whole of Hogwarts was open to him in this Cloak. Excitement flooded through him as he stood there in the dark and silence. He could go anywhere in this, anywhere, and Filch would never know. (Why don’t they just lock the dormitories, checking if everybody is in there, ensuring a system of urgency allows them to get out while warning the professors?  Instead of leaving the portrait virtually open? They are ASKING for students to leave.)

·         When does Filch sleep? During the day?

·         But then [Harry] noticed that [his mother in the Mirror] was crying; smiling, but crying at the same time. (Is Lily being emotional? Why is she crying? It doesn’t make much sense – would Harry want to see her crying?)

·         It was only when he was back in bed that it struck Harry that Dumbledore might not have been quite truthful. But then, he thought, as he shoved Scabbers off his pillow, it had been quite a personal question. (Indeed, our deepest desire/fear is personal… Then why using Boggarts in front of everyone?)

·         Nicholas died around his 666th birthday, guess why?

·         Why would Snape want infinite gold and immortal life, Harry? What’d he do? Teach for the rest of his life? And to think Snape wanted to die.

·         [Neville] who couldn’t understand […] why they had both brought their wands to the match. (They don’t wear it constantly?)

·         They’d got the [Leg-Locker Curse] idea from Malfoy using it on Neville, and were ready to use it on Snape if he showed any sign of wanting to hurt Harry. (1) a leg locker curse on someone who’s riding a broom? 2) don’t you have any other spell? 3) are they really ready to hurt their teacher without warning the other adults? 4) since they didn’t use it, Snape showed no sign of wanting to hurt Harry, even when they searched for any clue, right? 5) you’re going to be seen?)

·         Hagrid breeds a Dragon, which is illegal and dangerous, he makes 3 students watch it, it’s dangerous; he requires those three students to transport the dragon up a tower at night, dangerous and illegal.

·         Why doesn’t Quirell just find a Dark Spell to kill the Cerberus? Why hasn’t he attacked earlier? Why doesn’t Snape know how to calm a Cerberus so he wouldn’t need to “keep [his] eye on three heads at once”?

·         Las’night. I was down in the village havin’ a few drinks an’ got into a game o’ cards with a stranger. (We now know it was Quirell, but are you telling me that Quirell, a Ravenclaw with the most powerful Dark Wizard of Britain on the head, was unable to find any other way to get pass Fluffy than to somehow find the egg of a rare dragon and play with Hagrid in a pub; not even trying to fire Hagrid out of the school by telling the authorities he possesses an illegal dragon, or trying to breed the dragon by himself so the dragon can hurt Fluffy, maybe kill it, at least distract it so he can get the Stone?)

·         They found Fang the boarhound sitting outside with a bandaged tail when they went to Hagrid, who opened a window to talk to them.

When they told him about Charlie’s letter, his eyes filled with tears, although that might have been because Norbert had just bitten him on the leg.

Aargh! It’s all right, he only got my boot – jus’ playin’ – he’s only a baby, after all.

The baby banged its tail on the wall, making the windows rattle. (How can Hagrid even sleep?)

·         How they managed to get the crate back up to the castle, they never knew. Midnight ticked neared as they heaved Norbert up the marble staircase in the Entrance Hall and along the dark corridors. (So Hagrid made 2 students break curfew, carrying a dangerous dragon, and made them do the job of carrying Norbert up the tallest tower alone, instead of either helping them or doing the job by himself. If the Cloak is able to cover two persons plus a crate the size of a dragon that barely fit Hagrid’s hut, then surely it can cover Hagrid if he’s careful. Also couldn’t Charlie’s crew take the dragon from… Hagrid’s hut? It’s far off from the castle, near the Forest, they can still lift the crate with their brooms, it’s in the night, less dangerous and less complicated. They wouldn’t be seen. This request is absurd.)

·         I’m disgusted, said Professor McGonagall. Four students out of bed in one night! I’ve never heard of such a thing before! (What about the Marauders – are you being truthful? Or have they indeed managed not to get caught one time? In this case, the detentions concerned only day trouble, and there are a lot. If the Marauders had been proven to wander at night… I think they would have been expelled.)

·         Nothing gives you the right to walk around school at night, especially these days, it’s very dangerous. (Because of the Stone and the incident in Gringotts? Then why will you give detention about sending students in the Forest, dammit?)

·         A hundred and fifty points lost. That put Gryffindor in last place. In one night, they’d ruined any chance Gryffindor had had for the House Cup. Harry felt as though the bottom had dropped out of his stomach. (Why do 150 points suffice to ruin all chances to win, when at the end of the year, Gryffindor are still behind Slytherin after winning 160 points? Is Slytherin THAT MUCH in the lead? Or is it a plothole – a failure in Rowling’s attempt to make the punishment tragic?)

·         Your detention will take place at eleven o’clock tonight. Meet Mr Filch in the Entrance Hall. Prof. M. McGonagall. (Ah yes. 50 points each + detention in the Forest, and Neville was there J along with Harry, Hermione and Malfoy. Though… does this mean Snape agreed with sending Malfoy to the Forest? Malfoy doesn’t hate him afterwards, so I guess it was McGonagall’s decision, but… it’s suspicious.)

·         Right then, said Hagrid, now, now listen carefully, ‘cause it’s dangerous what we’re gonna do tonight an’ I don’ want no one takin’ risks. (WHY ARE YOU MAKING THEM DANGEROUS STUFF WITH SEARCHING SOMETHING SO EVIL IT KILLS UNICORNS?????)

·         There’s nothin’ that lives in the Forest that’ll hurt yeh if yer with me or Fang, said Hagrid. (Except werewolves, you know. Oh, and Fang is a coward. Wanna go with him?)

·         Right, now, we’re gonna spilt inter two parties an’ follow thet rail in diff’rent directions. (HAGRID TU ME RENDS OUVE!!!)

·         All right, but I warn yeh, he’s a coward, said Hagrid. (MAIS JUSTE CINQ LIGNES APRES TU TE CONTREDIS)

·         So me, Harry an’ Hermione’ll go one way an’ Draco, Neville an’ Fang’ll go the other. (Hagrid favours Harry and Hermione – “All right, Harry, Hermione?” – as he sends away a student he despises and another he doesn’t know with the dog who won’t be able to protect them, both 11 yo and utterly scared. Is this intentional from Hagrid – taking revenge on Malfoy? There was no need to split the group. They could have gone there together.)

·         Could a werewolf be killing the unicorns? Harry asked.

Not fast enough, said Hagrid. (Ah. No denying that werewolves could be in the forest.)

·         There’s summat bad loose in this Forest. (L)

·         Nah, if yeh ask me, that was what’s bin killin’ the unicorns, never heard anythin’ like it before. (L L L He doesn’t even know what could be the danger)

·         Hagrid! Look! Red sparks, the others are in trouble! (*panting furiously* AND WHY SPARKS? Hermione had to tell Hagrid to look. If she hadn’t seen the sparks they wouldn’t have gone to check on Malfoy and Neville. You can only see sparks if you’re looking for them. Also, sparks in a forest were the trees get thick and when they can get lost far away? This is stupid Hagrid. Making a sound would have been better – the danger would already be there so no need for discretion anymore. But the best would have been to keep them together.)

·         You two wait here! Hagrid shouted. Stay on the path, I’ll come back for yeh! (NNNNOOOOOO)

·         They […] stood looking at each other, very scared, until they wouldn’t hear anything but the rustling of leaves around them.

Right, we’re changin’ groups – Neville, you stay with me an’ Hermione, Harry, you go with Fang an’ this idiot. (Join the groups already and don’t send Voldemort’s target away from your protection? Also Hagrid called Malfoy an idiot, he’s not an exception, and keeps taking care to send him away from him.)

·         Why has Voldemort “waited for years” to return? Couldn’t he have tried to get the Stone sooner? Couldn’t he have tried to possess someone sooner? To make them drink unicorn blood before? Doesn’t hold up – things only start when Harry starts when there’s little reason to. Bad logic.

·         He turned and cantered back into the depths of the Forest, leaving Harry shivering behind him. (Did Malfoy send the sparks? It’s not said if he ran away. We don’t have news about him. We only know that Firenze galloped for long before finding Hagrid.)

·         Also the punishment kept the children awake for the whole night, making them tired for the next day… preventing them to get their much need hours of sleep, children abuse much?

·         Professor McGonagall watched them turn a mouse into a snuff-box – points were given for how pretty the snuff-box was, but taken away if they had whiskers. (Ah. Positive and negative teaching. Also animal abuse?)

·         My scar keeps hurting – it’s happened before, but never as often as this.

Go to Madam Pomfrey, Hermione suggested.

I’m not ill, said Harry. (MAIS–)

·         But rest assured, no one can possibly steal it, it’s too well protected. (ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT – unless it’s about how the Mirror will make the difference, MIRROR THAT WASN’T PLACED AMON THE RIDDLES BEFORE)

·         So Hogwarts have separate dormitories for boys and girls, and the girls’ stairs aren’t accessible for boys, but boys and girls can get in the Common Room do things, and they can leave through the portrait to you-know. If they wanted to prevent sex they failed.

·         Oh, let’s kick [Mrs Norris], just this once, Ron whispered in Harry’s ear, but Harry shook his head. (animal abuse?)

·         Go straight to the owlery and send Hedwig to Dumbledore, right? (Why didn’t you do it before? And Harry, why didn’t you suspect the landing was hard, and wizards should use some way to levitate/soften the landing before falling, like the Cushioning Charm? You could have killed yourself)

·         He sprawled next to Harry. (I hope Harry moved away, which wasn’t mentioned, or else Ron would have landed on him?)

·         She landed on Harry’s other side. (How? Did Harry and Ron move???)

·         It’s Devil’s Snare! (Religious reference again?)

·         What was the use of the room used for the riddles before though? It looks like a nice place to spend time in secret.

·         Why weren’t the riddles solved by the time the Trio came?

·         Why is Charms associated with the flying keys and transfiguration about “giving life” to the giant chessboard? Why isn’t it the contrary? Charms are meant to animate objects, like making a pineapple do tapdance; transfiguration modifies an object. Charms should have animated the chessmen while Transfiguration would make wings sprout from keys. Or is it because transfiguration doesn’t “give life” to chessmen but merely makes them big – as they’re already kind of sentient in their little forms – while Charms make keys fly constantly and thus require wings to apparate?

·         This isn’t magic – it’s logic – a puzzle. A lot of the greatest wizards haven’t got an ounce of logic, they’d be stuck in here for ever. (I hope they’re clever enough to solve a child riddle though?)

·         Harry deduced by looking at the tiny bottle (no mention of the contents) that there was hardly one swallow to pass the fire. Well then, if Quirell had drunk it, Harry would have found an empty bottle, right?

·         Grab brooms from the flying-key room, they’ll get you out of the trapdoor and past Fluffy – go straight to the owlery and send Hedwig to Dumbledore, we need him. (Isn’t Fluffy ON the trapdoor? Why haven’t you sent an owl to Dumbledore before? Between then and now, the only thing that changed is that you are right among the riddles, you haven’t seen Snape yet. You could have asked someone to send an owl the moment you saw the door open, which meant somebody had gone past Fluffy, at least possibly.)

·         I might be able to hold Snape off for a while, but I’m no match for him really. (Dude, even in 6th you’re a joke to him)

·         Now, wait quietly, Potter. I need to examine this interesting mirror. (WHY DON’T YOU TRY TO KILL HIM THOUGH)

·         AND Quirell somehow doesn’t mind saying “Lord Voldemort”… Why?

·         This mirror is the key to finding the Stone. (Or it could be a lure?)

·         What I want more than anything else in the world at the moment, he thought, is to find the Stone before Quirell does. So if I look in the Mirror, I should see myself finding it – which means I’ll see where it’s hidden! (This logic is convoluted. Harry doesn’t have any reason to think he’d know where the Stone is hidden, since 1) Quirell just said he was watching himself giving the Stone to his master and yet doesn’t find it, and 2) the Mirror doesn’t show reality, doesn’t show you a truth, but what you wish for, meaning Harry could have seen himself finding the Stone easily, but he’d know that in reality the Stone wouldn’t be found as easily as in the Mirror. I think Rowling failed in her logic. She wanted to give both a motive for Harry to look into the Mirror and an explanation as to how the Mirror works, an explanation meant to be not far from the truth, although Harry doesn’t understand why Quirell wasn’t getting the Stone but he did.)

·         Use the boy... Use the boy… (Does Voldelamort know the Mirror would work with Harry? Why?)

·         I winked and put the Stone back in its pocket – and as it did so, Harry felt something heavy drop into his real pocket. Somehow – incredibly – he’d got the Stone. (SOMEHOW yes. ???? Why did Dumbledore use such system…)

·         Master, you are not strong enough! (Quirell thinks Voldemort is not strong enough to talk directly to Harry – somehow – but he still feels threatened by him. He is incoherent, self-contradicting. Either he was too afraid/conditioned to feel helpless to oppose Voldemort, or he really started to believe Voldemort’s speech)

·         And once I have the Elixir of Life, I will be able to create a body of my own… (How? How do you know? It only says you can lengthen your life, not create a body. Unless the Elixir restores the body continuously? But even then how could you know the Elixir can create a body of your own?)

·         Better save your own life and join me… or you’ll meet the same end as your parents… (So… if Voldemort asks you to join him, if your refuse, he kills you?)

·         I always value bravery… (Is this how he convinces people?)

·         Quirell raised his hand to perform a deadly curse, but Harry, by instinct, reached up and grabbed Quirell’s face. (He wasn’t going to cast the Avada though? Even Voldy had to use a wand to do that)

·         (So in the movie I was always surprised that when Voldemort asks Quirell to kill Harry, he doesn’t use his wand/magic to do it. He does it… Muggle-style. But in the book it’s more logical: Quirell did as Voldemort told, seized Harry, and that’s when Harry noticed that touching Quirell hurt him. So Harry grabs Quirell’s arm and doesn’t let go. Doesn’t that hurt Voldemort though?)

·         We must have crossed in mid-air. No sooner had I reached London than it became clear to me that the place I should be was the one I had just left. (Huge plothole. Dumbledore could have Flooed directly to the Ministry, but he used a broomstick. Not only that, but Quirell/Voldemort expected Dumbledore not to use Floo, or to spend a long time in the Ministry because reasons, leaving him enough time to steal the Stone. I’d think Dumbledore did it on purpose, considering what’s said next… but since Quirell falls into the plothole as well – by thinking Dumbledore would be out long enough for him to escape with the Stone before he returns – it feels more like Rowling’s fault.)

·         I feared I might be too late. (Well next time don’t put an 11yo in mortal danger)

·         The effort involved nearly killed you. For one terrible moment there, I was afraid it had. (sigh… also would Harry die and revive without his Horcrux or would he really die at 11? Daaamn)

·         They have enough Elixir stored to set their affairs in order and then, yes, they will die. (Let’s assume they can’t use the Stone in one go to store Elixir for a long time, and that the Stone can only be used little by little…?)

·         Nicolas is 665 or 666 in 1991-92, meaning he’s born in 1326. On wiki, Nicolas is believed to be born in the 1330 or 1340 and have died in 1418 (“in the Muggle world”) at 70 or 88 years (that’s very long for a Middle Ages man

After his death, Flamel developed a reputation as an alchemist believed to have discovered the philosopher's stone and to have thereby achieved immortality. These legendary accounts first appeared in the 17th century.

We know either from the books that Wizards withdrew in the 17th century as well. Let’s say the books’ history follows pretty much the Muggles’, just a thought. Why isn’t there anything from before the 17th century? Because Wizards destroyed evidence? Why wouldn’t there be scripts about Nicolas’ Stone from the Middle Ages, when there are so many other tales left to the Muggles (to be disbelieved) as well? Or were there scripts about Flamel (in France?) in the 17th century which started to scare Wizards even more?

Also Nicolas and Perenelle were said to be Catholics – is this the case in HP or were they pretending?

And: Perenelle is probably from a derivation of "Petronille", meaning "stone", “little stone”; or “everlasting”, from the word “perennial”.

·         After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure. (Why? Why would wizards think that heavens truly exist, that there’s not just oblivion in death, and that objects related to death are just illusions? It comes from religious doctrine, and wouldn’t wizards reject that? Also this can be used in suicidal ideation)

·         Call him Voldemort, Harry. Always use the proper name for things. Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself. (Well Harry has just meant Voldemort on the back of his teacher’s putrefying skull and been nearly killed, and he knows that his parents were killed as well, so I don’t think a name is going to make that much of a difference. Also, please don’t Dumbledore. This puts Harry in unnecessary danger. If you really want to cheek Voldemort, at least make people call him Tom, or Riddle. Voldy can’t use a taboo on those names, unless he wants to get they-dared-use-my-name sms all day. Funny how the Leaky Cauldron’s bartender is called Tom as well.)

·         The truth. Dumbledore sighed. It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution. However, I shall answer your questions unless I have a very good reason not to, in which case I beg you’ll forgive me. I shall not, of course, lie. (…….???? Thank you Dumby that was uncalled for. Also you did lie.)

·         Voldemort said that he only killed my mother because she tried to stop him killing me. But why would he want to kill me in the first place? (He didn’t say that. He didn’t say that he wanted to kill you in the first place. He said that your mom wanted to protect you and she died because she kept opposing Voldy. Why would you conclude that he wanted to kill you personally, instead of thinking that he only wanted to finish the job like a good little villain? I see it came from “She needn’t have died… She was trying to protect you…” but uh, why would you directly conclude that he wanted to kill you in the first place? So quickly and naturally? I feel it’s a little stretched from Rowling.)

·         To have been loved so deeply, even though the person who loved us is gone, will give us some protection for ever. (Well, until you turn 17 Harry, and the blood wards fall. But… hasn’t anybody casted sacrificial protection before? Wasn’t this ever heard, or recognized as a love-curse-protection? Also sacrificial protection doesn’t only work on love: Harry was able to cast it on everybody in Hogwarts in HP7, but would you say he loved them all really deeply, like a mother to her child, or that what he had in mind, was to die so they wouldn’t die, and not that he had to die because he was a Horcrux? No. In this case, why didn’t Lily’s sacrifice work to protect everybody since 1981, preventing Cedric from dying for instance? Plus it’s tragic. You’re not protected because you deserve it, or because you’ve done good things – you’re protected because you’ve been loved. It depends on the love of others. And… well, what to think about children who were betrayed by their parents one way or another?)

·         Quirell, full of hatred, greed and ambition, sharing his soul with Voldemort, could not touch you for this reason. (Dumbledore presents things as though it is the fact that we are loved that repulses villains and makes them suffer. In reality it is the sacrificial protection speaking against Voldemort, who cannot touch Harry, while Crouch Jr, Pettigrew and other DEs can, if I remember well. Was Quirell full of hate, greed and ambition of his own? I’m not sure. Why is ambition presented as bad? That’s not that ambitious to want to serve a Master who treats you like shit. And uh… I don’t like this. In real life, people who should go to Hell will always be able to touch you, and drive pleasure from it sometimes. Love cannot protect you alone. This message in the book is a bit dangerous as it could make abused people think that if they’re not loved by others, then they’re worthless; and it hurts to be reminded that evil people can touch you in real life.)

·         Your father used [the Cloak] mainly for sneaking off to the kitchens to steal food when he was here. (Really, even though there are festivals each dinner at Hogwarts? Also, how do you know he mostly went “to the kitchens” – did you see it, or did he tell you that? Oh and, I love how Rowling shames Dudley for being fat and eating in excesses, but in Hogwarts every child is allowed to eat A LOT, sometimes they even want to steal from the kitchens. Dudley comes from a family where Petunia doesn’t get fat, Vernon doesn’t eat exceedingly, Marge is fat – so it suggests that their overweight comes from genetics – but people like James, precised to be “thin”, won’t get fat at all even if they eat like ogres – the advantage of genetics, you know. It’s hypocritical and fat-phobic.)

·         How did I get the Stone out of the Mirror?

Ah, now, I’m glad you asked me that. It was one of my more brilliant ideas, and between you and me, that’s saying something. You see, only one who wanted to find the Stone—find it, but not use it – would be able to get it, otherwise they’d just see themselves making gold or drinking Elixir of Life. My brain surprises even me sometimes… (But… this is just a huge plothole. Quirell didn’t want to use the Stone for its power. We could just stretch to think he wanted to use the Stone to save himself from Voldemort’s wrath; but at no point he wanted to use the Stone by himself, for himself. Second, we know what Quirell saw in the Mirror, and it wasn’t either making gold or drinking Elixir of Life, but “I see the Stone… I’m presenting it to my master…” The Stone trick only worked by chance. Also, it assumes that when someone goes to find the Mirror, which is supposed to show your deepest desire, if you want to get it out, you really have to have that wish desperate. Which is great because it means that even if Quirell/Voldy had understood this, they could have wanted to torture Harry so his wish would turn into getting the Stone – although here again it would be fair to say he’d want to “use it” to make the torture stop… Besides, it means that if Nicolas or Perenelle wanted their Stone back to prepare the Elixir, they wouldn’t be able to. They’d have to ask somebody, and their wish would be “I want the Stone and “use it” to give them to the Flannels” or something… Why aren’t they said to be selling Elixir of Life by the way? Anyway, plotholes.)

·         [Hermione:] Oh, Harry, we were sure you were going to – (die?)

·         ‘I always said he was off his rocker’, said Ron, looking quite impressed at how mad his hero was. (Hum – Dumbledore, a hero, really? Or is it Harry?)

·         [Hermione:] ‘We were dashing up to the owlery to contact Dumbledore when we met him in the Entrance Hall. He already knew – he just said, Harry’s gone after him, hasn’t he? And he hurtled off to the third floor.’ (If Ron & Hermione went from the third floor to the Entrance Hall so as to go to the owlery, then it means that it’s located on the level of the grounds, or that it’s not accessible with the staircases/corridors from the third floor’s door somehow. I always thought that the owlery was in a tower.)

·         ‘Please cheer up, Hagrid, we save the Stone.’ (No you didn’t, you made things complicated and put yourself in danger uselessly. If you hadn’t intervened Quirell still wouldn’t have had access to the Stone and he would have been probably stuck. Unless he decided to destroy the Mirror – what would have happened to the Stone then? Would destroying the Mirror free the Stone?)

·         [To Hagrid:] ‘It’s not a stoat sandwich, is it?’ (A stoat translates to “hermine” in French and now I’m having questions)

·         What are Dumbledore’s excuses for the points he gave though? Ron has played chess, Hermione has solved a child riddle, Harry has been more bold than “brave”; and Neville, who actually wanted to stop them, doesn’t get as much points as a Ron who plays chess well, but is still used to win over Slytherin. Why is Dumbledore doing that? I keep thinking that he forced Gryffindors to win the Cup so Harry would start to love him, and/or that he wanted to “teach” him that putting his own life in danger to fight Voldemort even if he’s too young deserves reward – a psychological conditioning to make Harry seek adventures.

·         They had hoped that Goyle, who was almost as stupid as he was mean, might be thrown out, but he had passed, too. It was a shame, but as Ron said, you couldn’t have everything in life. (How did Goyle pass, if he was that hopeless? And can you really get thrown out if you don’t pass exams? What’s this system? Who are those correcting 1st year exams – considering the students pass the tests with their teachers, are their exams corrected by them?)

·         Fred and George wish the school would forget telling them not to do magic outside school, and we can guess it’d give them an excuse to do it. The thing is, if they do it – when they’ve been taught by everyone that it is forbidden, it is not the school that’ll punish them, when they know it’s forbidden – it’s the Ministry who punishes. Whether you’ve been given your “Do not do magic outside school” card or not. This holds little logic…

·         Is flying on a broom or brewing potions considered using magic by the Ministry? Or are children’s use of magic covered up by the presence of their parents? (The Ministry didn’t know Harry hadn’t used the Hovering Charm in CoS so maybe they can’t know who the real casters are).

·         A wizened old guard was up by the ticket barrier, letting them go through the gate in twos and threes so they didn’t attract attention by all bursting out of a solid wall at once and alarming the Muggles. (Don’t you have a more effective hiding system? Rowling really has depicted Muggles as stupid.)