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Peeta had a long day in class, he could feel his head pounding and the only thing he wanted to do was lay down, but of course he had other plans, he had promised to head over to his.. friends? Girlfriends? Room and help her with her math homework, why he had done such a thing, well that could only be summed up to he never said no when it came to Emmie. It was a real problem.
He headed across campus quickly finally making it to her door and knocking. "I swear you better have coffee!" he calls through the door a small smile playing on his lips.
“Some infinities are simply bigger than other infinities.”
He was late, but then again when was he not late? He was Peeta Mellark and after 5 years together she knew better than to expect him at the time he had set. He of course was rushing, that was nothing new, but as an intern, in a hospital there was no rushing. A patient was a patient and she had come to understand that.
Dinner was getting cold. He knew it was so when he opens the door to their apartment only to see her waiting for him in the big red chair he always sat at when he was late, the glass of wine in her hand, he knew he was in trouble.
"You are late.." is all she whispers, her teeth running over her plump pink lips. She isn't mad, not anymore, she knows him, they know each other, but he should have known better than to be late to their anniversary dinner.
He was still in his scrubs, the button up he had bought for the occasion still in the closet and yet none of that mattered, not right now.
His blue eyes lock on hers and he looks at her, just looks at her for a minute before stepping closer once more, his hand coming up to cup her face gently, stroking her cheek bone. He presses his lips to hers and after a second she kisses him back, her arm wrapping around his neck. "Why do you stay with me.." he murmurs against her lips gently.
"Because.. You are my big shot and I can't seem to stop loving you.." she sighs.
He smiles against her lips before pulling back, his eyes bright. "I wanted to make this big, wanted to do something cheesy and romantic.. but honestly.. this is us, this me and you, this is all I know anymore Em, and this is all I want to know.." he takes a deep breath before dropping to his knee, pulling out a red box and popping the lid open causing her to gasp.
"I know i am not easy to deal with, I know i put you through a lot.. but I wouldn't want anyone else beside me every morning.. Marry me?"
Her eyes fill with tears and she quickly pulls him up, kissing his lips roughly once more. "You are a fucking idiot.." she whispers still crying. "Yes.. I will marry you.." she laughs happily and he pulls back sliding the ring into place. Where it would stay, for the rest of their lives.
❄❄❄❄ 8 Months Later
He was late, but he was always late. She didn't really worry at first, even if he had taken the stupid bike to work today. She wouldn't worry because he was just with a patient. He was just with a patient and he was fine. He wasn't answering his phone because he was with a patient.
Minutes passed and then hours, and before too long she was pacing, her heart beat racing as she dials his phone for what felt like the millionth time.
Her heart stops when it goes to automatic voice mail and she curses his name once more.
She sits in her chair and starts to count, knowing that any minute now he would walk through the door and it would take everything in her not to cancel the wedding that was only 2 months away.
She waits and she waits and eventually her phone rings, his name flashing in her screen.
"Where the fuck are you?" she all but growls into the phone but when she doesn't hear his automatic reply she knows something is wrong.
"Peeta?" she asks and what she hears scares her all the more.
"Em... you have to get down here" she knows that voice, that is Finnick's voice. Why did Finnick have her fiance's phone.
"Finn.. where"
"Get down here.."
The line goes dead and she is already moving, her hands set into motion as she pulls her coat on, her boots and wraps a scarf around her neck.
She is careful on the icy roads but eventually she pulls into the hospital rushing inside. Finnick is in the lobby and he shakes his head reaching for her hand.
"What happened.." Finnick simply leads her to the elevator pressing the trauma floor. He holds her hand the whole time and walks into Peeta's room with her.
Her breath catches in her throat as she takes him in, a lot paler than he should be, laying on stark white sheets, his face bruised but his bright blue eyes focused on her. "Hi.." he whispers and thats all it takes, she is rushing to him tears in her eyes taking his hand. "What the hell did you do.."
------------------------------------
Peeta knows what is wrong, he was a surgical intern in this same hospital after all, but knowing does not make the situation any easier when your clearly hysterical fiancee asks you what is going on.
He wasn't sure how it happened, all he did know was that one minute he had been on his way home and the next he had fallen off his bike, paramedics where everywhere and they had shocked him back to life, his injuries were bad but he was stable, none of that was what worried them.
He tried to explain to her, to the best of his ability, what was going on, wiping at the tears as they fell down her face. He knew he had a brain bleed, a bad one at that, he was going under the knife the next morning after his heart rate stabled and he had a 50/50 chance.
She cries harder and as she throws herself against his chest she whispers one thing.
"You can't leave me or I will never forgive you.."
"For dying..?" he asks lightly trying to make her smile.
"For making me love you..." she sobs before pressing her lips to his own once more.
She cries and he soothes and eventually she falls asleep, too tired from her crying to stay awake. Finnick is still in the room and Peeta only asks for one thing. As she sleeps he watches her, wanting these last moments with her, but he writes, he writes a letter he hopes she will never have to see.
He holds her hand until the last second and pulls her in to what he hopes wont be their last kiss, kissing her as if it was, needing her to know it was going to be ok, with or without him.
----------
The next morning he is taken into surgery and she is told to wait, the surgery should take three hours but when she sees his doctors walking out of the room only 45 minutes later she knows, she just knows and there is no point in anything or to anything.
Finnick takes her into his arms and yet she doesn't feel him, doesn't feel anything. The only person who could help her was gone and her world was falling apart, tearing at the seams. Finnick waits, as she cries, for what feels like hours and when her sobs die down, silent hiccups taking their place he presses the letter into her palm.
He wanted you to have this.
Freshie..
I feel like I need to write this, just in case I never get to tell you these things again, I want you to have them with you, because they will never be anything more true than what I am about to tell you...From the moment I met you i knew you were it, I knew I was done and there was no reason to keep looking because you were the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with..
You became everything I wanted, everything I thought about, any minute away from you felt like hours and hours felt like day.. Waking up to you was a blessing, one I took for granted for so long and now as i lay here looking at you and wanting nothing more than one more day I wish I could go back and appreciate every minute of it..
I have very few regrets, you know this.. but if I die tomorrow I will always regret not seeing you in that dress.. Not making you my wife.. I am going to regret the moments we wont share and the kids we will never have.. the blue eyes, blonde haired babies we wont watch grow up and the years I wont spend next to you growing old with the one person I know I love..I am sorry.. so so sorry for not being here to watch you become the most beautiful bride or the most amazing mother but hopefully where ever I am now I can still protect you..
I will never be sorry for making you fall in love with me.. and that is just something you will learn to forgive in time..
Please try to be happy..I know it will take time and I know that it will be hard but I want you to be happy.. for me..
I said I would love you forever and always.. no matter where I am this has not stopped being true..
I just wanted you to know that if love were enough, that if love were enough that I'd still be here with you..
I wont be the one who lets you go ∞ Peeta || Emmie
Well I am not sure what this is going to be, but with my eyes closed you are all I see..
Having your girlfriend live in Europe, no matter how brief her stay was to be was harder than he would have ever imagined. He had been with Em since he was a sophomore and now two and a half years later he was so used to having her around each time something happened he would subconsciously turn to laugh with her only to remember that she wasn't there. It was probably for the best, this was his last semester in the state school, he was waiting to hear back from each med school he had applied to and he kept telling himself he had to get used to this, she wasn't going to be in med school with him.
Skype and long phone calls that rang up his phone bill became the norm and more often than not he fell asleep still in front of his computer screen laughing about the fact that she could no longer get a decent burger around the corner, or the latest sleazy italian guy who had tried to hit on her.
It was hard, yet they always knew it would be, he could pretend for her sake that he was fine, but when the cameras were off he was a mess and all his friends knew it.
It was late for him, almost 3 am but that only meant that it was 9 am for her and he was holding up his latest acceptance letter for her to see.
"John Hopkins huh big shot?" she smirks into the camera sarcastically clapping her hands. "That is even more impressive than Yale Medical school huh? What is it? Third in the country?" her smile was teasing but he could see the fondness behind her eyes, he could see how truly proud she was of him and that made it all the more real.
He had dreamt of going to JHMS from before he even knew he could and now it was finally coming true, if only he could take his little bird with him.
"I told you I was smart no?" he teases back leaning back in his chair putting his letter back on his desk.
"How is what's her name?" he asks referring to her bitchy roommate, which only causes Em to roll her eyes and for them both to laugh.
"I miss you, I miss sleeping over" she sighs wistfully. "You snored less than she did" she jokes and he places his hand over his heart.
"Aw that is so romantic babe" he teases sitting up to poke his tongue out at her. "So.. thanksgiving in two days? Any big plans?" he asks biting down on his lip. He knew she wouldn't have any, she wasn't coming home and they had spent it together the last few year.
He watches as she sombers then shakes her head. "I will probably have a turkey burger or something" she jokes feebly and he nods knowing better than to continue to prob at this.
"I will see you soon no? Christmas is just around the corner" he nods, a sly smile playing on his lips.
The conversation ends two later just like it always does, her blowing kisses at the screen before heading off to class and him going to bed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Its Thanksgiving day and Peeta pulls his winter coat closer as he quickly makes his way up the narrow steps, all but running towards the door with the shiny number 207 in the front. His gloved hand comes up and he knocks once, then three times in a row, the way he always did back home.
He hears shuffling inside and his smile widens as a very surprised Emmie suddenly pulls the heavy door open. Her light eyes are wide and her mouth is agape as she takes him in.
"I was about to skype you.." is all she mutters as she continues to stare at him.
"I wasn't going to let you eat that whole burger by yourself.." he smirks. She takes another moment before jumping in his arms, her face buried against his neck. "God damn it big shot you are going to make me cry"
Peeta chuckles wrapping his arms around her tightly and kissing the top of her head. "Yeah yeah freshie its ok" he mutter before pulling away slightly tilting her face and kissing her, deeply, trying to make up for the two months of hell. "Now. Don't ever leave me again got it?" he jokes kissing her once more.
