#iedolas

Either because he didn’t want to cause a succession conflict or out of love for his late wife, Iedolas never remarried. That backfired when his son and sole heir died in battle. 

“He wished for immortality, that he might reign on eternally.” 

Meaning that without anybody to take the throne after him, he thought it’d be better if he didn’t need succession in the first place. Stupid. People died. With somebody dumb enough not to understand that at the helm, it was no wonder the country was foundering. 

“Thus, I merely cast a bit of magic for him...”

Cast magic? That shady chancellor? The hell? 

“But it seems to have had a most unfortunate effect.” 

Whatever it was he’d done, it must have been something lousy. Ardyn Izunia had come to the Empire thirty-four years ago, she’d heard. From what the adults said, ever since then the Emperor had been a changed man. He’d gone from a benevolent ruler to a tyrant. There were people who held to the more generous theory that it was because he’d lost his beloved wife, but Aranea suspected it was the chancellor’s doing.

The main thing was there were always a bunch of ridiculous rumors following him around. The rumors that people who got on his bad side vanished one after another, or that he embezzled as much of their hard-earned tax money as he wanted, eh, people in power got those, and he was hardly the only one they said that about. 

Ardyn: Yep!

Iedolas: ....you went on a walk through the forest at midnight...

Ardyn: Yep!

Iedolas: ...You killed a well meaning oracle...

Ardyn: Dead!

Iedolas: ....and then you turned someone into a daemon....who happened to be a....

Ardyn and Iedolas: ...Big tittied...

Ardyn: ...High Commander. Yes! It’s like I didn’t just get through explaining this! Now if you don’t mind, I’ve got things to do.

Iedolas: What things? You don’t do things!

Part 1

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So Gladiolus Middle-Name Amicitia lights the black candle on Halloween Night

Gladio!!!

Yes, he is a virgin

Mistakes were made

Ignis: “Gladiolus you bloody twat”

Prompto is the only one not freaking out when the house begins to shake and glow and Bad Things are Clearly Happening

Because he is TOO PISSED TO BE AFRAID

He keeps his promise. He curses Gladiolus with an eagle tattoo that spreads from his back to his chest and shoulders.

IT STARTS TO SQUAWK

Gladio: “WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO”

Prompto: “WHAT HAD TO BE DONE”

Gladio’s Tattoo: “SQUAWK”

Ignis: “CAN WE FOCUS ON THE FACT THAT THERE IS GREEN FOG RISING UP FROM THE FLOORBOARDS”

Noctis: “GLADIOLUS YOU STUPID FUCKING VIRGIN”

Iris: “THE KITTY TALKS AND IT SAID A SWEAR

It’s time to stop screaming and start hiding when they hear voices outside

In come the Sanderson Brothers

Ardyn, the eldest. Slick and slimy with an awful air of charisma that draws people to him...

Iedolas, the middle sibling (even though he looks like a grandpa). Basically a walking punchline. Neither of his brothers take him seriously. Useful only because he’s got the ability to pick up a scent like a daemon hellhound. 

Loqi, the youngest. Conceited. (I mean. Fair-- he’s very pretty.) Wants to be in charge, but also acknowledges that Ardyn is Quite Scary so he’s okay with his second fiddle. Sings like a hearthrob rockstar and moves all the girls and boys to tears.

Ardyn: “Welcome back, boys. It is time to Feast on the Life Force of the Young People”

Iedolas: “I smell a witch”

It’s PROMPTO OH NO

They find him hiding behind the cauldron

Loqi: “What century did you crawl out of”

Prompto: “Uh. The 21st”

Loqi: “Honestly. 21st century witches. No style”

Prompto: “Honestly. 18th century witches. NO TEETH” *Punches Loqi in the face*

He tries to get away as Loqi reels back, but Ardyn catches him and shoves him deeper into the room. Things don’t look good for Prompto. He’s no good at offensive magic and Ardyn’s powers are LEAGUES above his own

They’ve got Prompto pinned against the wall. He’s young enough that the Brothers aren’t above stealing his life away so that they can stay young forever

Gladio: *Jumping out from behind a bookcase* “HEY! ASSHOLES!”

Gladio’s Tattoo: “SQUAWK”

Gladio:

Also Gladio: “FEAR THE RESULT OF MASS POLLUTION! ACID RAIN!!!!!!!” *Sticks a lighter under the smoke detector, which turns on the sprinklers*

He grabs Prompto in the confusion and everyone runs for their lives

Noctis tells Ignis to grab Ardyn’s spell book on the way out

Noctis has the bright idea of going to the cemetery since witches can’t step on hallowed ground

Prompto: *A witch who can’t step on hallowed ground* “You guuuuuuuuuuuuys”

Also Prompto: *Sighs* “Good thing I brought my broom”

Ignis suggests that they meet up somewhere else once they feel safe, but Prompto doesn’t want the group to split up. He’s not the world’s cleverest witch, but he’s better protection than nothing

Plus he doesn’t want to be alone eeek! Ardyn is fucking terrifying

So. Yes. Prompto flies on his broomstick alongside the others.

Iris wants a ride!!!

Gladio: “Absolutely not”

Gladio’s Tattoo: “SQUAWK”

Also Gladio: “IS THIS FOR FUCKING EVER??!?!??!??!?!?!”

Prompto: “Um”

Also Prompto: “Have you tried putting your hand over its beak”

Gladio: *Does so*

Gladio’s Tattoo: *Muffled squawking*

Gladio: “WHAT THE FUCK”

Prompto: “IOU... one roll of duct tape”

It doesn’t take long for the Sanderson Brothers to catch up

Since they can’t set foot in the cemetery, Ardyn brings Ravus Nox Fleuret back from the dead to help capture them

Ravus doesn’t seem particulary excited to help but he chases after them anyway

The group escapes in the sewers

Prompto has no idea if he’s still on hallowed ground or not. The tunnels are too narrow to navigate a broom

Ignis carries Prompto in his arms

Gladio: “God, I wish that were me”

Noctis: *Wading through filthy water so he can lead the way out of the sewers* “Same tbh”