Fireshade Diaries - Tell Him
She sat in a booth in a dark corner of the club. She didn’t know why, but there was comfort in this spot. She felt like she could hide in the shadows, hide from the disappointment and concern. Atheona felt like she was getting better, moving past “The Forgetting”. As she sat enjoying her bourbon, the space was filled by a handsome stranger. Meeting his eyes, her heart began to beat faster. She recognized him but she wasn’t sure how. But he obviously meant something to her...or at least he did. His eyes never left her as he took a seat across from her. She couldn’t help but squirm under his watchful gaze.
“She told me you didn’t remember. I wasn’t sure I believed her until now.” She tilted her head as his voice rumbled over her. Her body quivered just at the dulcet tones of his voice and she idly wondered what else he could make her body do. “I’m sorry,” she said, truly meaning it. She wished she remembered this gorgeous man. Atheona watched as he pulled a cigar out of his blazer pocket and patted his other pockets in search of a lighter. She smiled, amused, and felt a sense of deja vu. She felt heat at the end of her finger and looked down to see a flame waiting silently as if ready to light his cigar. “Well that’s never happened before.” He grinned, finally finding his lighter, and things low in her body tightened. He was beautiful when he smiled. “Repressed memory is not a loss of memory, kitten. You just need the door cracked open.” Atheona’s heart fluttered when he called her “kitten”. But why would he call her that? She shook her head and sighed. “I’m afraid if the door is cracked the demons will push their way through,” she whispered. No one would understand why she did what she did, but she stood by her decision. He leaned back in the booth, tapping his lighter on the table. Atheona watched as he seemed to fight a battle within himself.
“You’ve never been afraid of demons before. You’re the kind of woman that makes demons keep their distance.” He stopped and muttered, “And there’s a good man out there who I’m sure misses you.” Atheona’s heart almost soared out of her chest. Surely this man couldn’t mean himself? Her luck would not be that good judging by her latest scorecard. She swallowed, begging the butterflies in her stomach to subside. She wanted to argue the point that taking the pills was her way of pushing the demons damn near off the planet but she knew it wouldn’t be any good. “If I have a man, I’d sure as hell like to know where the son of a bitch is,” she muttered, taking a sip of the bourbon she had in front of her. She watched him over the rim of her glass, a ghost of a smile gracing his lips and she couldn’t keep her mind from wondering what it would be like to kiss him. He lit his cigar, puffing out the sweet smoke. “The white knight is out conquering his beast so he doesn’t kill us both if you...” He laughed sadly, a sneer crossing his face. “He’s doing what he needs to. I can’t help but respect that.” She almost spat out her bourbon as she realized he was talking about John. “You mean John,” she asked shaking her head. “From what I’ve heard, he and I are over. Though for the life of me I can’t think why.” “You got tired of the boy scout act,” he said with a smirk. “But nothing is forever.” Atheona watched as his face fell, his hand clenching as if he was angry about something, or hurt. He cleared his throat, taking another drag from his cigar. “You love each other. I think you’ll remember that when you see him again.” She wanted to scream protestations but she was confused as to why. Atheona’s heart broke at his words. She felt something with this stranger, something that wasn’t just superficial. As she watched him, a flash of a memory came to her. A moment. A cave. Candles. Passion. Heat. Fire. Claws. Love.
Her eyes met his and she felt a fire inside her ignite. “Did we...have we...” She cleared her throat, struggling to phrase the question she desperately wanted an answer to. “I mean, I just got a flash of.....something.” He nodded, a minute movement of his head. “We have.” Heat flared deep in her as she watched his body tense, she thought he was remembering their time together. But his face betrayed nothing. She itched to touch him but she didn’t know why. She didn’t know the man but she also didn’t want to question her instincts. Still though, she gripped her hands into fists. She was afraid if she made a move toward him he would shy away. “Did things end with us too,” she asked, hanging her head a bit. He took a few puffs of his cigar and Atheona’s heart sank as she began to fear she had ruined yet another seemingly wonderful relationship. “There was nothing to end. We shared a few...intimate moments. Nothing more.” Atheona felt like her heart was being ripped from her chest. She could feel the tears welling and refused to let this wolf see her cry. She could hear the smirk in his voice when he said, “Pissed off your shining knight enough to satisfy my need to make him miserable.” Anger flared through her, a hot burning rage that almost turned into an inferno. She wiped away the tears before she turned back to face him. “So you like to use women then.” The cold smile that crossed his face was unapologetic and she fought the urge to slap it off his face. “When it suits me,” he said, tapping his cigar on the table and taking another puff. Something didn’t sit right with her. She may not remember him but her heart knew him, and this asshole facade was not convincing. “Explain to me why you would want to piss off John.” “It’s an alpha thing,” he said, a condescending tone piercing his voice. A tight smile graced Atheona’s lips. “Taya was right,” she muttered, grabbing the glass of bourbon she’d been drinking. She downed the last of the amber liquid and slammed the glass on the table with more force than she’d intended. A curse crossed her lips as the shards of glass pierced her hand. Addan dropped his cigar and grabbed her hand, pulling towards him. His features creased in concern as he grabbed a napkin and began pulling out the pieces of glass. “You need a stitch or two,” he said, looking at the gashes that marred her hand. “Or I can lick it, your choice.”
The moment Addan had touched her hand she had felt her eyes go red. The embers that had ignited when she’d seen him were now a full-fledged inferno raging through her. She closed her eyes as she was flooded with memories: sharing a bottle of bourbon, him ravaging her when he knew she’d rejected John’s mark, nights spent strategizing about the Moon King before he took out the DeVandalls. Panic, love, fear, and heartache broke her into a million pieces as every moment they had shared washed over her. She tried to steady her voice, tried to keep her expression neutral. But he would see her red eyes and he would know. “Lick please,” she said tentatively. She watched as his eyes shot to hers and he smirked, lifting her wounded hand to his mouth. A shudder ran through her as his tongue stroked over her skin. She fought the flames that threatened to overwhelm her. She bit her lip as she let out a soft moan. The man had such power over her, if only he knew.
As his eyes came up to meet hers, she closed them from his intense gaze. Her free hand involuntarily rose to stroke through his hair but she pushed it back down. She tried desperately to push the pieces of herself back together. Clearing her throat, she asked, “How goes the research with the librarian?” Immediately, his eyes snapped to hers and he leaned back. “You remember.” Pulling her hand from his grip, running her thumb over where he’d licked, she sighed. “I remember us,” she said, waving a hand between them. “Or whatever has been going on here.” She narrowed her eyes. “And you can stop being an ass now, jerk.” He let out an exasperated sigh. “The research goes nowhere.” She folded her arms and leaned back. She still wanted to feel him, to touch him. His tongue on her was enough to make her want more. “Could that have anything to do with you going AWOL?” That only earned her a glare which she shook her head in response. “What’s happened to you?” This was not the Addan she’d known. This was a man on the brink of giving up, hopeless and scared. Whether he would admit that or not. Picking up his cigar again, he took a few draws from it. “Working my way to the seventh stage, I suppose.” His snarky comments were no longer something she cared to hear and she knew he was being an ass on purpose. Her anger and frustration flared once again. She reached out and knocked the cigar from his mouth. “Bullshit! You need to get your ass in gear. So what if the research with the professor is going slow. Get up and go see the pirate!” “There is nothing,” he roared, slamming his hands on the table. His anger startled her and she tried to back away or at least give herself room to make a run for it should he lash out at her. “And even if there is, even if I get free, what of my daughter? If she dies, it’s all for nothing.” She watched him run a hand through his hair, his eyes meeting hers. “I’m tired Athie.” She felt for him. She knew the frustration, the not knowing, the timeline was all wearing on him. She blinked back tears. She didn’t want to see him give up. “Do you want me to go?” “I never want you to go,” he said, his face softening a bit. But then sheer determination replaced the soft look he’d given her. “But I should. You had something good going here before I came along, Athie. I might not like John, but he’s a good man.”
In that moment, her anger boiled over. She was tired too. She remembered people pushing her to choose John, to choose the safer route. But she loved Addan. “No,” she yelled before she could stop herself. She bit her tongue, drawing blood. She hung her head, burying her fingers in her hair. She was tired of always saying goodbye, always wondering when she would see him again. Couldn’t he see how much she needed him? “Please,” she mumbled. “Please don’t leave me again.” Atheona felt him take her hands, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. “Alright, alright. I’m right here,” he said soothingly. “Maybe we should go somewhere more private though. I don’t want to end up in the Keep Herald again,” he said, a tentative smile playing on his lips. She let him pull her up to stand, squeezing his hand. “I’ll go wherever you want.”
TO BE CONTINUED....
