Temporary Home Chapter 20 In Which Claire Admits Her Feelings
Claire had went home, feed Adso and showered changed her clothes and headed into the office. She still had work to do today. Gellis wasn't there. Off doing visits, she knows. She decides to take a paper day and try to catch up on the pile of files on her desk. She pulls Fergus' first. She records what had transpired, expect for the kisses. The kisses. She shakes herself, refocusing. When Gellis returns a couple hours later, right before five., she had made some process. The stack was noticeably smaller. Gellis leans against the wall and watches her for a moment.
"Micah is settling well." She says getting Claire's attention. She looks up and smiles.
"So, they still wish to adopt him?"
"Aye. They are in love with him, they and their children." Micah who, at a mere two weeks old was found abandoned at a local church, was now a year old and had been in the same foster home since being taken into custody. He was the one Claire had asked Gellis to check on.
"That is excellent news."
"Aye, have my report right here." She hands it to her. "Now spill lass. You spent the night with Jamie Fraser, something had to happened."
"Come Gel just because you are perpetually horny doesn't mean that two adults can't spend the night together and have nothing happen."
"But, something did. Yer face gives ye away everytime."
"Bloody hell," she curses her glass face before sighing."Okay, we didn't have sex but there was some intimacy."
"I ken'd it."
"My nightmare came back."
"Oh lass." Gellis drops in a seat by her and takes her hand.
"Yah, it was ugly. Woke Jamie but thank God, not Fergus. He held me and spoke Ghaildhig over me until I calmed. Then asked who Frank was."
"Ohh."
"Just so. I told him. Told him everything. I have only bared my soul to you like that."
"It means something." Gellis says.
"I know. And that terrifies me. I think.."
"Aye?"
She changes her mind. "We kissed."
"Ohhh, how was it?"
"It was..it was the barest touching of our lips..and it had my heart pounding so hard."
"Oh Claire!"
"He told my of his parents. That they knew right away. That when a Fraser finds the one it is forever. He wasn't just talking about his parents."
"Nae."
"And, I know how he feels but.."
"But?" She wouldn't help her. She has to figure it out herself.
"But..you know how love is a four letter word to me. I am not sure I can give him what he needs."
"Claire, close yer eyes. Go on. Close them." She does. "Now picture him. Got him?"
"I do."
"Ye are smiling lass. Now picture him walking away. He doesn't look back and now he is gone, forever."
"Ohh," Claire feels her heart reaching out to him.
"What do ye feel?"
"Bereft, lost, heart broken."
"Ye ken that is the answer, don't ye?"
"I love him. I am in love with him." She whispers.
"Aye lass, ye are."
