#hyperindependence

August should receive an award for incredible decision-making

Hyperindependence is a trauma response, okay? One you might reasonably develop if you have been forced to survive without any meaningful external support. If you witness that and your response is to praise them for doing it, calling their desperate survival ‘strong’ or ‘independent’ or ‘inspiring’, in any context where it is very much implied that they don’t need help and you won’t provide it, it is not a compliment.

If you call someone who has been forced into a state of hyperindepence ‘strong’, in any way inplying that they don’t need help and you won’t provide it, it’s not a compliment, it’s gaslighting.

The desire to disappear is rarely about wanting to die.

Sometimes it is just the fantasy of no longer being emotionally responsible for everyone.

Some people dream of fame.

Others dream of anonymity so complete that nobody expects anything from them anymore.

No achievements. No performance. No constant reliability.

Just existence without pressure attached to it.

You do not want to vanish.

You want relief.

Relief from being the dependable one. The mature one. The person everyone leans on without asking if your legs are shaking too.

There is something deeply comforting about imagining a quiet life somewhere far away.

A small apartment. Rain against the windows. A phone nobody expects you to answer immediately.

A version of life where your worth is not measured by how useful you are to other people.

Because exhaustion changes people.

Eventually, even high-achieving people begin fantasizing about becoming invisible.

Not out of sadness.

Out of emotional overcrowding.