#huntercollier

It’s kinda difficult to describe how it is to have family, especially parents, you are estranged with. Part of you feels like you should love them like you might others in your life. When you don’t, sometimes you might feel a bit guilty about it. You don’t want them around you, but you don’t want them just to not exist either. You can want them to be happy but also no where near you. When friends talk about doing everyday normal things with their parents, you find yourself unable to relate. And the fix isn’t to try to force a relationship. Sometimes it’s better just to keep that distance. Making a relationship happen can do more harm than good. And when someone in that family feels like they are owned that love can be even more destructive. Blood really isn’t thicker than water. (And if you are a Star Wars family, really you’re just kinda fucked.)

I don't know that Theron would necessarily grieve for Satele if she dies. Not in the way some of us might assumed. I’m not a fan of stories that have an adult character love their parents unconditionally when they meet them for the first time. The truth can be much more complicated. That is the case for Theron. Which is a breath of fresh air. 

In Annihilation; Theron makes it really clear he didn't want a relationship with either of his parents. He didn't wish them harm but he didn't seek to have them in his life. When Jace meet him for the first time, he did so after almost 30 years and Theron’s reaction boiled down to a stoic "no” “I already told you, Master Zho was my father" and a walk out the door. Jace and Theron’s relationship seemed to almost become friendly but it was clear Theron didn’t want to have a father/son relationship with him and drew a line when it came to certain intimate parts of his life that he flat out refused to speak with Jace about. Then came the heated exchanged they had when Theron left the SIS and neither of them attempted to speak to the other until Iokath. 

And as for Satele, in Lost Suns when Master Zho died, Theron broke into her apartment to tell her their former Master was dead. But refused to tell her who he was and quickly left. It is made pretty clear they both knew that the other was aware of who they were, but the conversation was treated with a very strict level of formality. For Satele’s part, she does keep a locket-holo of a young Theron that the Commander can find on her ship but in a codex entry we find that Theron tried to contact her once when all hell broke lose with Zakuul which she never responded to. And as for Theron, when Tython is attacked by the Empire (heh, by the Imperial PC. Sorry Theron) he does tap into security footage to spy on Satele to make sure she was not on Tython. However, their relationship with each other is stand-offish at best, virtually non-existent at worst. His attitude towards her is one of exasperation. And she is stoic and remote towards him.

Neither of them have anything anywhere close to a relationship that can be considered “family.”

So I'm not sure he'll grieve in a "traditional" way if Satele dies to save him. I doubt he will have a revelation moment where he realized she always cared about him because I believe he already knows she does in her way. I can see him being upset she would be willing to die for him because he doesn't want that, and never would ask someone to do that for him. Her being his mother would be almost inconsequential. Hell, a Jedi Commander had a closer relationship with Satele than Theron does. Theron and Satele are barely better than strangers. They just happen to have a blood relation. I'm pretty confident that is how Theron feels about her.

If this goes down like that, I could see Theron having the immediate reaction of shock. Then probably going straight into angry at her. Eventually, I could seeing him having a solemn drink and a contemplate his relationship with those he cares about. Needing the Commander to be there for him for weeping, probably not. I think he would be more physically upset if it was the Commander or Lana to dies instead.